I have let her know that she is safe and has a voice in our family.Sylvia Woodman responded:
You saying it and her internalizing it are two different things. How are you letting her know? Through words?I expanded a little:
Hugely true and important.That made me think to create a page for future use. I found several Just Add Light posts to help create a quiet collection. The first quote below is also from the discussion quoted above here.People (even people who want to become unschoolers) will write things like
“We’ve taught them...”
“I’ve always told him…”
“In our family we believe…”
“He knows that…”
and then they complain to us with exasperation that the child seems NOT to have learned, understood, heard or believed the “truth” or simple fact.That’s a problem with the parent’s expectation and vision, more than with the child.
Unschooling takes a long time to learn. Rushing a child to understand something complicated while the parent isn’t even looking in the right direction to see unschooling is a problem that’s easily solved. Stop pressuring the child. Stop “communicating” the confusion. Quietly empty yourself of much of what you think you know. If it were working, there would’ve been no reason to ask us for help.
With a mind open to change, then, go here: Read a Little
Children need time to heal. Quiet time is probably better than constant noise, no matter how much the noise is intended to express love and reassurance.
Quiet enough to hear![]() "They don't need my direction much of the time, but they need me to pay attention to what is happening *in case* I'm needed. I need to be quiet so I'm not filling up their world with my noise, and so that *I* can hear as well." —Sarah Thompson Sometimes be quiet and wait![]() SandraDodd.com/peace/fightingcomments The quote isn't from there, but the information could be helpful. photo by Sandra Dodd Watch quietly
photo by Jennie Gomes Calm and quiet![]() Please take time for reflection. Take time for your mind to be calm and quiet. Take time to be open to input, not busy creating output. Don't respond, think. Take the ideas and let them "be" in your mind and go spend lots of time with your children and consider and observe how the ideas might play out in your own home with your own kids.
—Pam Sorooshian
photo by Sandra Dodd Quietly better
photo by Marty Dodd Look quietly
Shhhh
photo by Karen James Sometimes, wait.
photo by Sandra Dodd Quietly, lovingly now
photo by Sandra Dodd |