Finding balance between gaming and other activities
keeliebean@...
Hello all,
We've been unschooling for just over a year now. My son is 7 and went to school for 3/4 of the year before deciding to stay home. Although my son is happier at home I feel like we are not fully tapping into the joyful side of unschooling.
He is heavily into gaming and we're supporting that interest - we bought a new gaming laptop a few months ago and heaps of new games in the last Steam sale. We've also progressed onto more mature games including finally allowing him to play GTA 5. My son really enjoys playing and watching gamers on YouTube. We've also connected with a few other unschoolers online. I watch and play with him as much as possible although it's hard to find the time because my 14 month old is very active and if we're sitting in front of the laptop he wants to touch everything in range. If I'm not with him I'm usually close by.
Although it's not always easy to see what he is learning I'm confident that he is learning. We've been unschooling for just over a year now. My son is 7 and went to school for 3/4 of the year before deciding to stay home. Although my son is happier at home I feel like we are not fully tapping into the joyful side of unschooling.
He is heavily into gaming and we're supporting that interest - we bought a new gaming laptop a few months ago and heaps of new games in the last Steam sale. We've also progressed onto more mature games including finally allowing him to play GTA 5. My son really enjoys playing and watching gamers on YouTube. We've also connected with a few other unschoolers online. I watch and play with him as much as possible although it's hard to find the time because my 14 month old is very active and if we're sitting in front of the laptop he wants to touch everything in range. If I'm not with him I'm usually close by.
My DH has not read much about unschooling so it's hard for him to fully accept the amount of gaming. So he criticises and then my son - who has quite a prickly character anyway - responds badly. He also thinks that DS should be spending more time with kids his age at school. I think this is partly some resentment that he has to go to work everyday while DS gets to do whatever he likes at home.
I really want to respect
his right to choose what he does without it creating disharmony in our
family as opposed to the peaceful joy I read about here. I wish he was a
bit more rounded in his choice of activities. It's hard to reassure his
dad that he is learning when I'm still in leap of faith mode. I set up a
private FB page for his dad so I could post pics of things we are up to
every day but I'm kind of scrapping for moments when he's not gaming or
watching YouTube so I can present something different.
I also sometimes feel like I don't have the energy to offer more and be a really good unschooling mum to him because the baby takes so much of it. So I worry that he's not doing much because I'm not offering enough. That said, a day when we stay home all day and he gets to do whatever he wants on the laptop is what he describes as a perfect day at the moment.
I also sometimes feel like I don't have the energy to offer more and be a really good unschooling mum to him because the baby takes so much of it. So I worry that he's not doing much because I'm not offering enough. That said, a day when we stay home all day and he gets to do whatever he wants on the laptop is what he describes as a perfect day at the moment.
I'm not sure what I'm asking for really. Some
reassurance that gaming all day is okay. Some ideas of how to create
more peace in our house and assurance for my DH that what we're doing is
okay.
Thanks,
Keelie
DS 7, DS 1Sarah Thompson
Don't look for balance. Look for fun ways to get some physical activity while gaming. XBox Kinect, WiiU, and maybe PS4 (I'm not sure) all have features that allow you to play physical games. Trampolines or jumping on the bed are great while watching youtubes.
My son was very much like this at 7. He got into karate at 9 1/2 and now he divides his time between the two. Efforts to get him to be physical just for the sake of it were met with the response you would expect from someone being told "your choice of activity is inferior," if even for a moment. Work on trust, and play.
My dh felt the same way as yours, I think. He tried all sorts of things to get Wallace off the computer. It was mostly a disaster. I mediated it as best I could, and pointed out all the good as often as I could, and was respectful and honest with my husband about his concerns and his right to an opinion on the matter, and he eventually relaxed. We bought some games that he enjoyed, thay they could play together, as a way to connect. The more my son saw his dad taking an interest in his choices, the more respected he felt. Then, when dh asked him if they could do something together that *wasn't* on the computer, Wallace knew it wasn't just to get him to stop with the computer, and he was more interested.
It was all about relationships and respect, in my home, not ideas about what "should" be happening. When we embraced the former, worries about the latter fell away.
Sarah
K Pennell
Was your husband involved in the decision to begin unschooling?
I ask, because it sounds as if he may not have been, but perhaps I'm misreading or just not getting the fullest picture. Was he part of the decision for DS to leave school? If he feels a bit out of the loop, he might feel he has valid concerns that aren't being heard or addressed. If he's open to reading about unschooling, there's lots of great information. If he isn't, though, maybe there are some compromises you can make that could make life more joyful and peaceful for everyone.
If DH has concerns about his lack of interaction with other kids, would his concerns be eased by knowing about the online friends? If not, is there a local homeschool group or unschool group you could meet with? If a couple of hours once a week would set your husband's mind at ease it might make home more peaceful the rest of the time. If your son isn't interested in it, perhaps you could entice him (maybe money for Steam or pizza or something). If there isn't a homeschool group of interest, perhaps there is a 4H club (my sons did a robotics themed 4H club for a while).
Other things we've done to include Dad: making and launching model rockets, family movie night, evening read alouds (including audio books), nature documentaries, and making Christmas gifts for extended family.
From: "keeliebean@... [AlwaysLearning]" <[email protected]>
To: [email protected]
Sent: Monday, January 4, 2016 11:49 PM
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Finding balance between gaming and other activities
Hello all,
We've been unschooling for just over a year now. My son is 7 and went to school for 3/4 of the year before deciding to stay home. Although my son is happier at home I feel like we are not fully tapping into the joyful side of unschooling.
He is heavily into gaming and we're supporting that interest - we bought a new gaming laptop a few months ago and heaps of new games in the last Steam sale. We've also progressed onto more mature games including finally allowing him to play GTA 5. My son really enjoys playing and watching gamers on YouTube. We've also connected with a few other unschoolers online. I watch and play with him as much as possible although it's hard to find the time because my 14 month old is very active and if we're sitting in front of the laptop he wants to touch everything in range. If I'm not with him I'm usually close by.
Although it's not always easy to see what he is learning I'm confident that he is learning. We've been unschooling for just over a year now. My son is 7 and went to school for 3/4 of the year before deciding to stay home. Although my son is happier at home I feel like we are not fully tapping into the joyful side of unschooling.
He is heavily into gaming and we're supporting that interest - we bought a new gaming laptop a few months ago and heaps of new games in the last Steam sale. We've also progressed onto more mature games including finally allowing him to play GTA 5. My son really enjoys playing and watching gamers on YouTube. We've also connected with a few other unschoolers online. I watch and play with him as much as possible although it's hard to find the time because my 14 month old is very active and if we're sitting in front of the laptop he wants to touch everything in range. If I'm not with him I'm usually close by.
My DH has not read much about unschooling so it's hard for him to fully accept the amount of gaming. So he criticises and then my son - who has quite a prickly character anyway - responds badly. He also thinks that DS should be spending more time with kids his age at school. I think this is partly some resentment that he has to go to work everyday while DS gets to do whatever he likes at home.
I really want to respect
his right to choose what he does without it creating disharmony in our
family as opposed to the peaceful joy I read about here. I wish he was a
bit more rounded in his choice of activities. It's hard to reassure his
dad that he is learning when I'm still in leap of faith mode. I set up a
private FB page for his dad so I could post pics of things we are up to
every day but I'm kind of scrapping for moments when he's not gaming or
watching YouTube so I can present something different.
I also sometimes feel like I don't have the energy to offer more and be a really good unschooling mum to him because the baby takes so much of it. So I worry that he's not doing much because I'm not offering enough. That said, a day when we stay home all day and he gets to do whatever he wants on the laptop is what he describes as a perfect day at the moment.
I also sometimes feel like I don't have the energy to offer more and be a really good unschooling mum to him because the baby takes so much of it. So I worry that he's not doing much because I'm not offering enough. That said, a day when we stay home all day and he gets to do whatever he wants on the laptop is what he describes as a perfect day at the moment.
I'm not sure what I'm asking for really. Some
reassurance that gaming all day is okay. Some ideas of how to create
more peace in our house and assurance for my DH that what we're doing is
okay.
Thanks,
Keelie
DS 7, DS 1Jo Isaac
Hey Keelie [😊]
Firstly, over the past 9 month since we've lived here I've seen your DS at various things - parties, trampolining, swimming - both being active and being with friends...he always seems like a happy, friendly kid.
Second - it's only been a year since you started unschooling/properly deschooling. And he's at the age when kids start to get *really* into gaming...I'd think both those things combined make it likely that yes - gaming is going to be his preferred activity. Also, you said he's never been all that active anyway - but after a good long while of deschooling, and being able to play his games unhindered by school or whatever, you might find he'll want to do more things out of the house eventually.
We did get Kai a mini-tramp, but to be honest he doesn't use it much anymore - he did in the start, but not now the novelty has worn off. There are less options to be active when kids mostly play on laptops - like your DS and Kai do. But I don't worry anymore - Kai's been predominantly gaming on his laptop most days for at least 2 years - he's still healthy, happy, and more and more keen to do other things outside the house now - like swimming, walking and karate. But it's not 'balanced' - or not how an outsider would see 'balanced' - he still games for the better part of most days.
It might help to ask your husband if he thinks that DS would be anymore active if he were at school, sat at a desk all day long? He'd likely be just as stationary. Is it mostly the lack of activity that is worrying your DS? I know your DS has friends, both online and IRL. For many introverted kids, having friends online is so much easier for them anyway - how fantastic they get that opportunity, and aren't forced to 'socialize' with big overwhelming groups of kids everyday! [😊]
Really, it's still early days for you all. If you want to post things on the Facebook page for your husband, what about screenshots of things DS is making/doing in his games with exciting captions of what is going on? Is DS interested in going to Eltham H/S park day at all?
Jo
________________________________
From: [email protected] <[email protected]> on behalf of keeliebean@... [AlwaysLearning] <[email protected]>
Sent: 05 January 2016 04:49
To: [email protected]
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Finding balance between gaming and other activities
Hello all,
We've been unschooling for just over a year now. My son is 7 and went to school for 3/4 of the year before deciding to stay home. Although my son is happier at home I feel like we are not fully tapping into the joyful side of unschooling.
He is heavily into gaming and we're supporting that interest - we bought a new gaming laptop a few months ago and heaps of new games in the last Steam sale. We've also progressed onto more mature games including finally allowing him to play GTA 5. My son really enjoys playing and watching gamers on YouTube. We've also connected with a few other unschoolers online. I watch and play with him as much as possible although it's hard to find the time because my 14 month old is very active and if we're sitting in front of the laptop he wants to touch everything in range. If I'm not with him I'm usually close by.
Although it's not always easy to see what he is learning I'm confident that he is learning.
The issue we have is that he is not very physically active and apart from visiting his friends he rarely wants to go out and do anything. He never has been a very active child to be fair but it really worries my DH who thinks it's unhealthy for him to be in front of the computer all day.
So I try to introduce other things but generally it's not met with much enthusiasm. A trip out of the house can be spoiled by moaning and continuously asking to go home even with incentives like ice cream and burgers. I invite him to do activities in the backyard and he's not interested. He has few interests outside of gaming. He doesn't want to use our pool, he doesn't like sports, doesn't want to go the beach, doesn't want to read stories. Says he likes drawing but never uses the materials I leave out for him.
My DH has not read much about unschooling so it's hard for him to fully accept the amount of gaming. So he criticises and then my son - who has quite a prickly character anyway - responds badly. He also thinks that DS should be spending more time with kids his age at school. I think this is partly some resentment that he has to go to work everyday while DS gets to do whatever he likes at home.
I really want to respect his right to choose what he does without it creating disharmony in our family as opposed to the peaceful joy I read about here. I wish he was a bit more rounded in his choice of activities. It's hard to reassure his dad that he is learning when I'm still in leap of faith mode. I set up a private FB page for his dad so I could post pics of things we are up to every day but I'm kind of scrapping for moments when he's not gaming or watching YouTube so I can present something different.
I also sometimes feel like I don't have the energy to offer more and be a really good unschooling mum to him because the baby takes so much of it. So I worry that he's not doing much because I'm not offering enough. That said, a day when we stay home all day and he gets to do whatever he wants on the laptop is what he describes as a perfect day at the moment.
I'm not sure what I'm asking for really. Some reassurance that gaming all day is okay. Some ideas of how to create more peace in our house and assurance for my DH that what we're doing is okay.
Thanks,
Keelie
DS 7, DS 1
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Firstly, over the past 9 month since we've lived here I've seen your DS at various things - parties, trampolining, swimming - both being active and being with friends...he always seems like a happy, friendly kid.
Second - it's only been a year since you started unschooling/properly deschooling. And he's at the age when kids start to get *really* into gaming...I'd think both those things combined make it likely that yes - gaming is going to be his preferred activity. Also, you said he's never been all that active anyway - but after a good long while of deschooling, and being able to play his games unhindered by school or whatever, you might find he'll want to do more things out of the house eventually.
We did get Kai a mini-tramp, but to be honest he doesn't use it much anymore - he did in the start, but not now the novelty has worn off. There are less options to be active when kids mostly play on laptops - like your DS and Kai do. But I don't worry anymore - Kai's been predominantly gaming on his laptop most days for at least 2 years - he's still healthy, happy, and more and more keen to do other things outside the house now - like swimming, walking and karate. But it's not 'balanced' - or not how an outsider would see 'balanced' - he still games for the better part of most days.
It might help to ask your husband if he thinks that DS would be anymore active if he were at school, sat at a desk all day long? He'd likely be just as stationary. Is it mostly the lack of activity that is worrying your DS? I know your DS has friends, both online and IRL. For many introverted kids, having friends online is so much easier for them anyway - how fantastic they get that opportunity, and aren't forced to 'socialize' with big overwhelming groups of kids everyday! [😊]
Really, it's still early days for you all. If you want to post things on the Facebook page for your husband, what about screenshots of things DS is making/doing in his games with exciting captions of what is going on? Is DS interested in going to Eltham H/S park day at all?
Jo
________________________________
From: [email protected] <[email protected]> on behalf of keeliebean@... [AlwaysLearning] <[email protected]>
Sent: 05 January 2016 04:49
To: [email protected]
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Finding balance between gaming and other activities
Hello all,
We've been unschooling for just over a year now. My son is 7 and went to school for 3/4 of the year before deciding to stay home. Although my son is happier at home I feel like we are not fully tapping into the joyful side of unschooling.
He is heavily into gaming and we're supporting that interest - we bought a new gaming laptop a few months ago and heaps of new games in the last Steam sale. We've also progressed onto more mature games including finally allowing him to play GTA 5. My son really enjoys playing and watching gamers on YouTube. We've also connected with a few other unschoolers online. I watch and play with him as much as possible although it's hard to find the time because my 14 month old is very active and if we're sitting in front of the laptop he wants to touch everything in range. If I'm not with him I'm usually close by.
Although it's not always easy to see what he is learning I'm confident that he is learning.
The issue we have is that he is not very physically active and apart from visiting his friends he rarely wants to go out and do anything. He never has been a very active child to be fair but it really worries my DH who thinks it's unhealthy for him to be in front of the computer all day.
So I try to introduce other things but generally it's not met with much enthusiasm. A trip out of the house can be spoiled by moaning and continuously asking to go home even with incentives like ice cream and burgers. I invite him to do activities in the backyard and he's not interested. He has few interests outside of gaming. He doesn't want to use our pool, he doesn't like sports, doesn't want to go the beach, doesn't want to read stories. Says he likes drawing but never uses the materials I leave out for him.
My DH has not read much about unschooling so it's hard for him to fully accept the amount of gaming. So he criticises and then my son - who has quite a prickly character anyway - responds badly. He also thinks that DS should be spending more time with kids his age at school. I think this is partly some resentment that he has to go to work everyday while DS gets to do whatever he likes at home.
I really want to respect his right to choose what he does without it creating disharmony in our family as opposed to the peaceful joy I read about here. I wish he was a bit more rounded in his choice of activities. It's hard to reassure his dad that he is learning when I'm still in leap of faith mode. I set up a private FB page for his dad so I could post pics of things we are up to every day but I'm kind of scrapping for moments when he's not gaming or watching YouTube so I can present something different.
I also sometimes feel like I don't have the energy to offer more and be a really good unschooling mum to him because the baby takes so much of it. So I worry that he's not doing much because I'm not offering enough. That said, a day when we stay home all day and he gets to do whatever he wants on the laptop is what he describes as a perfect day at the moment.
I'm not sure what I'm asking for really. Some reassurance that gaming all day is okay. Some ideas of how to create more peace in our house and assurance for my DH that what we're doing is okay.
Thanks,
Keelie
DS 7, DS 1
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Hurn Family
My 8 year old daughter is the same, but with minecraft. Her perfect day is a home day playing the game and watching her favourite YouTubers and I find she doesn't like going out as much as she used to.
The thing I've learnt about gaming is that it has the potential to branch out in so many different directions, it's up to me to expand on what my daughter already loves.
So here is what I've done:
- Accepted that we are in a home phase and focused on making home interesting, comfortable and fun for them.. she cannot resist if I have created a water park in the yard that we are enjoying.
- Appreciated that staying home has so many benefits, like saving money, wearing only underwear which reduces laundry, and having the time to get the home organised and comfy
- Helped her maximise her minecraft experience by installing it on the ps4 and the PC. She has learnt to type and learnt about servers and mods and computer stuff. She watches her favourite Youtubers and is learning heaps from them. We have created her own YouTube channel and we record videos together. She has made friends on the homeschooling server and interacts with them and others on the gaming servers. She plays minecraft story mode which is different still! We have minecraft Lego we play. I find other kids who like minecraft and tee them up for minecraft play dates. I buy her minecraft books that she can't put down! She has recently picked up textas again and enjoys drawing her favourite characters and draws plans for what she will build.
- Get involved in the game so I can see what all he fuss is about, minecraft has been fun for me too.
- Appreciated that her love of minecraft means I have the opportunity for quality time with my 4 year old son, eg we play Lego in the lounge while she plays happily.
My son likes to go out sometimes so we have had to figure out ways to accommodate everyone. We have shops and a playground within walking distance, so if my daughter doesn't want to leave what she is doing, we leave her home with a phone while we walk , this gives my son the change of scenery he enjoys and my daughter is happy.
When considering an outing ask yourself if it will make everyone happy, if it doesn't, scrap it and think of another plan.
Giving some advance notice when we need to take the car out helps.
We have worked out a loose schedule for our week and I have it on the fridge, this includes one trip to the swimming pool for fun, one mail pick up. Sometimes I order small, cheap things online so the mail pick up often involves a parcel for the kids to open so they enjoy coming.
Depending on what your husband is like, you could print off an article for him to read on what the benefits are of the game your son is playing. I know for minecraft there are heaps of amazing benefits and skills she is learning by playing.
"My son really enjoys playing and watching gamers on YouTube"
Try and think positively about this, because it means he is actually splitting his time between two activities, not just one.
I hope this helps in some way.
Sarah
Sent from my iPhone
On 5 Jan 2016, at 3:19 PM, keeliebean@... [AlwaysLearning] <[email protected]> wrote:
So I try to introduce other things but generally it's not met with much enthusiasm. A trip out of the house can be spoiled by moaning and continuously asking to go home even with incentives like ice cream and burgers. I invite him to do activities in the backyard and he's not interested. He has few interests outside of gaming. He doesn't want to use our pool, he doesn't like sports, doesn't want to go the beach, doesn't want to read stories. Says he likes drawing but never uses the materials I leave out for him.The issue we have is that he is not very physically active and apart from visiting his friends he rarely wants to go out and do anything. He never has been a very active child to be fair but it really worries my DH who thinks it's unhealthy for him to be in front of the computer all day.Hello all,Although it's not always easy to see what he is learning I'm confident that he is learning.
We've been unschooling for just over a year now. My son is 7 and went to school for 3/4 of the year before deciding to stay home. Although my son is happier at home I feel like we are not fully tapping into the joyful side of unschooling.
He is heavily into gaming and we're supporting that interest - we bought a new gaming laptop a few months ago and heaps of new games in the last Steam sale. We've also progressed onto more mature games including finally allowing him to play GTA 5. My son really enjoys playing and watching gamers on YouTube. We've also connected with a few other unschoolers online. I watch and play with him as much as possible although it's hard to find the time because my 14 month old is very active and if we're sitting in front of the laptop he wants to touch everything in range. If I'm not with him I'm usually close by.
My DH has not read much about unschooling so it's hard for him to fully accept the amount of gaming. So he criticises and then my son - who has quite a prickly character anyway - responds badly. He also thinks that DS should be spending more time with kids his age at school. I think this is partly some resentment that he has to go to work everyday while DS gets to do whatever he likes at home.I really want to respect his right to choose what he does without it creating disharmony in our family as opposed to the peaceful joy I read about here. I wish he was a bit more rounded in his choice of activities. It's hard to reassure his dad that he is learning when I'm still in leap of faith mode. I set up a private FB page for his dad so I could post pics of things we are up to every day but I'm kind of scrapping for moments when he's not gaming or watching YouTube so I can present something different.
I also sometimes feel like I don't have the energy to offer more and be a really good unschooling mum to him because the baby takes so much of it. So I worry that he's not doing much because I'm not offering enough. That said, a day when we stay home all day and he gets to do whatever he wants on the laptop is what he describes as a perfect day at the moment.I'm not sure what I'm asking for really. Some reassurance that gaming all day is okay. Some ideas of how to create more peace in our house and assurance for my DH that what we're doing is okay.Thanks,KeelieDS 7, DS 1
Tori Bart
My nine year old daughter is also in this home-phase with everything that is roblox and minecraft. Sarah's message almost mirrors where we are at right now, which is also reassuring. I'm relieved I'm not the only one who likes to take the opportunity to make our home cosy and welcoming, organised and inspiring.
We have recently (this week) adopted a young dog who has been kennelled all of his two years so we have a lot of work to do with and for him. This is enriching for our girlies too (9 and 12). We're all learning so much. So here we are at home, a lot, for his sake. I feel confident that both our daughters are making good use of this semi-confinement and they are sourcing all their own entertainment. Finding their own balance I think. Well, they keep finding me to tell and show me everything they've done or have found out and its always with huge smiles. I do sit with them occasionally, when they want me to.
My 9 year old has made her bedroom in to her office, with a desk and 'proper' chair and for the past two days she's squirreled herself away occasionally coming down to tell us something "AMAZING" she's learnt or made on the servers. And how funny her favorite you tubers are. I like them too. I take her up nibbles and drinks and she shows me all that she's done. I'm super impressed by it all anyway. There's so much joy on her face when she gets to tell us all about it. And as my oldest tells me "honestly Mum, it's true; when we're laughing, we're learning". Can you tell I have Joyce Fetteroll's tea tin on quotes. Grin.
My youngest is DESPERATE to have her own you tube channel. I have tried and failed to get one for her (I am not good at that though I have tried hard). Would anyone please offer a link to advise how to?
Warmest regards
Vic, Milly and Hettie
Anna Black
Hi Keelie 😄 I'm going to echo what Jo said - I've seen your son at various events and he seems like a happy, friendly kid with a great sense of humour. I still remember that birthday card he made and the way he described it. I don't have much extra to offer in the way of suggestions, except maybe he'd enjoy starting to make his own YouTube videos? Even just for fun without uploading them, Abby went through a big stage of doing that for a while. If he's as happy as he seems staying home and exploring all his games and YouTube, I think he's doing wonderfully. Abby sometimes has days where she mostly watches YouTube and plays Minecraft, but she tends to be miserable and cranky by the end of the day and really perks up with social interaction and doing something physical with me. She's a big extrovert though, so quite different. As he gets older, maybe your son will enjoy getting together with other kids to game, or move further into gaming with others online. Does his dad play his favourite games with him? That might be a good way for them to connect. As for not wanting to go out, can he bring his games with him? Then he could come and go a bit more. |
Sandra Dodd
For dads, there are two books that might help. You can get them cheap or free, in e-books. They’re not too long to print out. :-)
Pam Laricchia, Free to Learn
http://www.amazon.com.au/Free-Learn-Joyful-Unschooling-Joyfully-ebook/dp/B007GS3TBQ/ref=sr_1_fkmr0_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1452148021&sr=8-2-fkmr0&keywords=unschooling+dads
(That’s Australian Amazon; others should look at their own place.)
Unschooling Dads, Skyler Collins
http://www.everything-voluntary.com/p/book-project-iv.html
Sandra
Pam Laricchia, Free to Learn
http://www.amazon.com.au/Free-Learn-Joyful-Unschooling-Joyfully-ebook/dp/B007GS3TBQ/ref=sr_1_fkmr0_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1452148021&sr=8-2-fkmr0&keywords=unschooling+dads
(That’s Australian Amazon; others should look at their own place.)
Unschooling Dads, Skyler Collins
http://www.everything-voluntary.com/p/book-project-iv.html
Sandra
Sarah Thompson
To set up a youtube channel, the easiest thing to do is to make a gmail account. That account will automatically have a linked channel.
Sarah
Jo Isaac
Instructions on making a YouTube channel
http://www.wikihow.com/Make-a-YouTube-Channel
|
www.wikihow.com
How to Make a YouTube Channel. Starting a YouTube channel, eh? YouTube is a great way to get noticed on the internet and, if successful, earn a living! However, you ...
|
Jo Isaac, PhD
Post-Doctoral Research Assistant,
Centre of Tropical Biodiversity and Climate Change,
James Cook University, Townsville.
Scientific Writer and Researcher: http://joisaac.wordpress.com
Post-Doctoral Research Assistant,
Centre of Tropical Biodiversity and Climate Change,
James Cook University, Townsville.
Scientific Writer and Researcher: http://joisaac.wordpress.com
From: [email protected] <[email protected]> on behalf of Sarah Thompson thompsonisland@... [AlwaysLearning] <[email protected]>
Sent: 07 January 2016 17:54
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [AlwaysLearning] Finding balance between gaming and other activities
Sent: 07 January 2016 17:54
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [AlwaysLearning] Finding balance between gaming and other activities
To set up a youtube channel, the easiest thing to do is to make a gmail account. That account will automatically have a linked channel.
Sarah
redheadmom11@...
Since we're discussing gaming and balance, I wonder if anyone has had a teen like my son. He's 15 and says that he hopes to become a planetary scientist, so he aspires to go to college. At this point, however, he has been completely involved in gaming (actually, this has been his main activity for about 4 years now). I've discussed with him that he's going to need certain skills for college, but he hasn't shown much motivation for preparing himself in this way. Another issue we have is eating. He eats very little because he won't stop his games long enough to eat a decent meal. I've tried keeping the house stocked with his favorite foods, and I will take the food to him while he's playing, but more often than not I end up throwing it away uneaten. Last year he was diagnosed with constitutional delay- at 15, he is 4'8 and 65 lbs. He has never been a big eater, and I fear his preoccupation with gaming is making it worse. I am desperate for advice- especially on the eating issue! Thanks so much!
Shelly
Alex & Brian Polikowsky
<<<<<Last year he was diagnosed with constitutional delay- at 15, he is 4'8 and 65 lbs. He has never been a big eater, and I fear his preoccupation with gaming is making it worse.>>>>
So I went to look up what Constitutional growth Delay was and what causes it and it has nothing to do with how much one eats or not.
My son is not a big eater either and is a pretty slender boy but on the tall side.Generally kids with your son's conditional will resume normal growth later and have average height or something be on the short side.That does not sound like anything terrible or that you should worry and nowhere did it say to make the child eat more food.Sure keep bringing him easy to eat snacks and food. Drinks he can sip while he games are helpful. My son drinks tons of chocolate milk and fruit smoothies in sports bottles or straws.Have things he loves for him to eat! Offer it and bring them to him lovingly.Don't pressure or expect him to eat .Make smaller plates with less food so you dont throw much out!Food should be enjoyable and not a chore!Make yummy stuff that smells good!Make easy to eat snacks! Finger food!Alex
Sandra Dodd
-=-<Last year he was diagnosed with constitutional delay- at 15, he is 4'8 and 65 lbs. He has never been a big eater, and I fear his preoccupation with gaming is making it worse.>-=-
Alex’s response was great. Please re-read it.
Eating doesn’t make people tall.
Affection, love, physical touch—if you wanted proof that the lack of something can cause stunted growth, children in orphanages, untouched, didn’t develop as well.
I’m NOT suggesting you causes anything, and I’m NOT suggesting that you could ‘touch’ him to being bigger.
I’m trying to say that blaming video games is unreasonable.
“Preoccupation” is NEVER kindly said or kindly thought. It’s critical and dismissive every time it’s spoken. Preoccupation is a bad thing.
If you change your words, you will change your thoughts. If you change your thoughts, you will change your actions.
http://sandradodd.com/focus
Please read there.
And
http://sandradodd.com/mindfulofwords
And read as much as you can about video games. Size doesn’t matter, with video games. Perhaps the best thing you could do is encourage and enable and provide in that direction. It not only leads to a world of learning, it can (easily, and increasingly) lead to jobs.
Sandra
Alex’s response was great. Please re-read it.
Eating doesn’t make people tall.
Affection, love, physical touch—if you wanted proof that the lack of something can cause stunted growth, children in orphanages, untouched, didn’t develop as well.
I’m NOT suggesting you causes anything, and I’m NOT suggesting that you could ‘touch’ him to being bigger.
I’m trying to say that blaming video games is unreasonable.
“Preoccupation” is NEVER kindly said or kindly thought. It’s critical and dismissive every time it’s spoken. Preoccupation is a bad thing.
If you change your words, you will change your thoughts. If you change your thoughts, you will change your actions.
http://sandradodd.com/focus
Please read there.
And
http://sandradodd.com/mindfulofwords
And read as much as you can about video games. Size doesn’t matter, with video games. Perhaps the best thing you could do is encourage and enable and provide in that direction. It not only leads to a world of learning, it can (easily, and increasingly) lead to jobs.
Sandra
redheadmom11@...
****"Size doesn’t matter, with video games."***
While yours and Alex's posts were both very helpful, that is the statement that hit me the most. I had never thought of it that way, and it's really opened my eyes to what my son is feeling. He is very self-conscious about his situation, and no matter how much I try to encourage him, it is HARD for a kid his age to go through something like this. That was really insightful. Thank you.
And regarding future careers involving gaming, I have mentioned to my son that maybe he'd like to look into how to be a video game tester. He seemed mildly interested but hasn't really explored that avenue yet. I had also mentioned to him that he could make YouTube videos of himself gaming, possibly with him and my husband together (he's also an avid gamer). They are an excitable pair and would be very funny to watch. Several months ago I had also told him about your son who got a job for Blizzard. He thought that was awesome. I could definitely see him doing something in this field in the future.
Anyway, thanks for your input. It's always helpful.
Shelly
Celeste Burke
-= He's 15 and says that he hopes to become a planetary scientist, so he aspires to go to college. At this point, however, he has been completely involved in gaming (actually, this has been his main activity for about 4 years now). =-
What skills does he need to go to college? Are you sure he doesn’t have them already? One core skill required in gaming is problem solving. Another is hand-eye coordination. Strategy, resource management, memory (both short term and long term), reading, math (often done in your head in real time), communication (especially in team games), decision making (both short term and long term) are all skills exercised while gaming. Look at it this way:
- Great Problem Solving Skills
- Great Resource Management
- Excellent Reading Comprehension
- Good with Numbers and Complex Math
- Good Communication Skills
- Great with Short Term and Long Term Strategies
It sounds like the start of an awesome résumé (or CV) doesn’t it? You said your son has been "involved in gaming" for 4 years but I don't get the feeling that you know much about what games he's playing and, consequently, what he's learning from them. The more you know about the games he plays, how he plays them, his gaming successes, his thoughts about the games he plays, the more you'll know about the skills he has and how he can apply those skills to whatever he decides to do in his life.
On Sat, Jan 16, 2016 at 1:12 PM, redheadmom11@... [AlwaysLearning] <[email protected]> wrote:****"Size doesn’t matter, with video games."***
While yours and Alex's posts were both very helpful, that is the statement that hit me the most. I had never thought of it that way, and it's really opened my eyes to what my son is feeling. He is very self-conscious about his situation, and no matter how much I try to encourage him, it is HARD for a kid his age to go through something like this. That was really insightful. Thank you.And regarding future careers involving gaming, I have mentioned to my son that maybe he'd like to look into how to be a video game tester. He seemed mildly interested but hasn't really explored that avenue yet. I had also mentioned to him that he could make YouTube videos of himself gaming, possibly with him and my husband together (he's also an avid gamer). They are an excitable pair and would be very funny to watch. Several months ago I had also told him about your son who got a job for Blizzard. He thought that was awesome. I could definitely see him doing something in this field in the future.Anyway, thanks for your input. It's always helpful.Shelly
sukaynalabboun@...
I have a question though - I sometimes find maintaining a good connection (with both kids - 7 and 1) quite exhausting. I'll have a really good day then I find myself wanting to zone out and play on my phone the next day. Does it get easier or do people find ways to manage this?
For me, wanting to BE with my kids, actively with them, became my priority.( It sort of already was in the first place, they have been my focus, but definitely much more intensely since practicing unschooling).
This group and Sandra's site were a bit of fresh air- finally some other people who thought it was not crazy to pay mindful, meaningful attention to our kids. I started out learning how much farther that could stretch, into all areas of our lives, and now it feels very natural and flowing. I honestly do not feel deprived of personal time, I feel fulfilled!
That said, your kids are still very young and it *is* hard to be patient and present. I would suggest maybe moment by moment, day by day.
http://sandradodd.com/nest
http://sandradodd.com/nest
About halfway down, there is a quote by Caren Knox (I think!) She talks about laying the foundations for future learning and unschooling. I think with a 7 and 1 y.o., you are still in that nesting and foundations building stage. For the tough times, this is helpful:
Sukayna
claramont@...
-=-I have a question though - I sometimes find maintaining a good connection (with both kids - 7 and 1) quite exhausting. I'll have a really good day then I find myself wanting to zone out and play on my phone the next day. Does it get easier or do people find ways to manage this?-=-
I’d love to read the answers to that. It was so different to attachment parent and unschool one person for 5 years: I was so available to dive in whatever project with him at any given time and focus 100%. With a similar situation to yours ages-wise (a 7 1/2 year old and a 2 1/2 year old), I’m realizing its a whole other reality. It can be frustrating at times for my son for us to constantly be interrupted by his sister (who’ve very active and talks a lot) when he wants to do something with me. Often when we read a book she talks non-stop, describing what she sees on the images - which he finds awfully sweet most of the time, but sometimes it does really prevent him from hearing the story, so we try to ask her to listen with us or we try to find something else for her to do, but 3 minutes later she comes back and interrupts again. Earlier he wanted to play cop and robber with me in the street, but we ended up not really doing it b/c she doesn’t run fast enough to be either cop or robber and she would step down the sidewalk with cars coming - he was very different at her age and never stepped down a sidewalk but with her we need to keep our eyes on her as she just runs anywhere. I tried to run with her in a carrier but she is really really heavy now and I couldn’t really run. I tried the stroller but she didn’t want to sit in it :) I ended up running at the same rhythm as her which he didn’t enjoy b/c of course he could catch us right away when we were robbers and we never caught him when we were cops. :) So we decided to wait for daddy to be done with work by which time it was raining :)
I told him we can look at Sandra’s page with suggestions for little ones, and choose some things to keep her really busy when we start a game or a project - though I realize that with her personality most things she’ll enjoy doing WITH US and not on her own for more than a few minutes.
Clara
Sandra Dodd
Sometimes it can help to ask one of the kids to help find something that both would enjoy.
semajrak@...
<<I have a question though - I sometimes find maintaining a good connection (with both kids - 7 and 1) quite exhausting. I'll have a really good day then I find myself wanting to zone out and play on my phone the next day. Does it get easier or do people find ways to manage this?>>
Maybe look away from feeling exhausted. Think of other, more positive ways to see how you're feeling. Try to find ways to think about how you feel that celebrate what you've accomplished instead of focus on how you've been depleted. That will make the next moment easier--maybe even something to look forward to, instead of something to be weary of.
A few weeks ago my husband, son and myself went for a bit of a hike. My son wanted to climb a big, steep hill that overlooked the ocean and had rocks at the top that he could climb and sit on. I looked up that hill and thought "Oh crikey! That's a steep hill." (I'm not in as good a shape I used to be.) But I could see that Ethan really wanted to climb it, and he really wanted us to join him, so I smiled and said "Let's go!" He's thirteen. I don't know how many more years I'll be invited (or have) to join him on his adventures. I choose to relish them now, while I still have the health and the opportunity to do so.
Ethan ran ahead, exited. My husband followed closer behind him. I took a deep breath and began walking too. Instead of looking all the way up the top of the hill, I looked at the ground as I climbed. I looked right and left and relished in the little details I found. Seeing the ground move steadily beneath my feet was encouraging, and made the climb seem not so steep. With every bit of progress I made, I thought "I'm doing it!" Even when my breathing was getting laboured and my steps were getting closer together, instead of thinking about how exhausted I was feeling, I thought about how good I was doing, and I how much I looked forward to seeing Ethan's excitement (and the view, of course) at the top.
I've climbed big hills (physically and metaphorically) like this for a couple of decades now. I don't look up and think "That's going to be exhausting." I look up to get a sense of where I want to go. Then I start walking. As I walk, I listen to my breathing. I watch my progress. I notice the beautiful details along the way. I look up every once in a while to celebrate how far I've come. I haven't made it to the top of every hill I've wanted to climb, but I don't let that negatively influence my next attempt.
It might not seem like it now, but those early years pass fast. I love all the happy memories I've made with Ethan these past 13 years. As he's growing more and more into his own interests, I can see the little boy he once was twirling on trampoline for the twentieth or more time saying "Watch me now!" landing with pride every time. I can hear the breathless laughs of a child who routed for the hundredth time for Tom the cat to catch that too-clever mouse Jerry. I know the brave spirit of that little person exploring the dark night and caves of Minecraft. I was there for all of it and more. Thousands of hours of dedicated focus. I don't regret a single moment. If anything, I wish I'd given more. I still have time, thankfully.
It did take a lot of my time, attention and energy, and there were times when I was really, really tired at the end of the day, and mornings when I was slow to want to embrace the day. But I see all that time and energy and attention as an investment--in my son, and in my own future. If I get to grow old, I hope these are some the moments that bring colour to my winters.
Karen James
Juliet Kemp
--- I have a question though - I sometimes find maintaining a good
connection (with both kids - 7 and 1) quite exhausting. I'll have a
really good day then I find myself wanting to zone out and play on my
phone the next day. Does it get easier or do people find ways to manage
this? ---
You could also think about whether you can build more recharge time into
those 'really good days'. Being with small children really is tiring,
and it being rewarding and enjoyable doesn't stop it from being tiring
too. What recharges you may not be what recharges me, but you can build
it into small moments if that's what you have right now. Just stepping
into the garden for a few moments (possibly with the 1 yr old in arms),
or micro-meditation (watching your breathing for just a few breaths), or
talking to another available adult (partner or friends or family) about
getting a little bit of regular downtime.
I sometimes suggest "snuggle up with iPads" time to my 3 yr old -- I'm
right there with him, and I'll glance at what he's doing/watching and
I'm there if he needs me, but I can read something or have a quick chat
on Facebook for a few minutes. Bonus points if I've managed to get a mug
of tea brewed at the same time ;) I find that can work well for both of
us and recharge us for the next round of running around / imaginative
games / etc.
Juliet
connection (with both kids - 7 and 1) quite exhausting. I'll have a
really good day then I find myself wanting to zone out and play on my
phone the next day. Does it get easier or do people find ways to manage
this? ---
You could also think about whether you can build more recharge time into
those 'really good days'. Being with small children really is tiring,
and it being rewarding and enjoyable doesn't stop it from being tiring
too. What recharges you may not be what recharges me, but you can build
it into small moments if that's what you have right now. Just stepping
into the garden for a few moments (possibly with the 1 yr old in arms),
or micro-meditation (watching your breathing for just a few breaths), or
talking to another available adult (partner or friends or family) about
getting a little bit of regular downtime.
I sometimes suggest "snuggle up with iPads" time to my 3 yr old -- I'm
right there with him, and I'll glance at what he's doing/watching and
I'm there if he needs me, but I can read something or have a quick chat
on Facebook for a few minutes. Bonus points if I've managed to get a mug
of tea brewed at the same time ;) I find that can work well for both of
us and recharge us for the next round of running around / imaginative
games / etc.
Juliet
Sandra Dodd
Today a new group member was unhappy that I returned a post recommending that the child should be limited to two hours of game play. I wrote to her and sent links to good and happy information for becoming more familiar with unschooling, because she had said in the post I intercepted that she was new to unschooling.
She responded: "My suggestions were to do with all day screen time and not to do with unschooling.”
As those who have successfully moved into unschooling discover, it is only when there is no separation between life and learning that unschooling is working well.
Tonight, working on something unrelated, I found this:
http://sandradodd.com/limits/listening
It’s from a discussion in which a mom wanted to keep a child from listening to audiobooks so much.
It’s not so much about what a child would be doing, but why a parent would want to stop him. Learning doesn’t always show.
Sandra
She responded: "My suggestions were to do with all day screen time and not to do with unschooling.”
As those who have successfully moved into unschooling discover, it is only when there is no separation between life and learning that unschooling is working well.
Tonight, working on something unrelated, I found this:
http://sandradodd.com/limits/listening
It’s from a discussion in which a mom wanted to keep a child from listening to audiobooks so much.
It’s not so much about what a child would be doing, but why a parent would want to stop him. Learning doesn’t always show.
Sandra
Joyce Fetteroll
On Feb 29, 2016, at 12:03 AM, Sandra Dodd Sandra@... [AlwaysLearning] <[email protected]> wrote:Today a new group member was unhappy that I returned a post recommending that the child should be limited to two hours of game play.
Everyone who requests to join Always Learning gets an email describing what the list is about. Ideally no one should be let onto the list until they've read the description and replied.
But many people don't reply. Even though the 1st 2 words of the subject are a bold PLEASE REPLY. Maybe it gets routed to Spam folders for some. I don't know.
If you're on the list but didn't get the description or didn't read it, here it is:
==============================
The Always Learning list is DIFFERENT!
Unlike most unschooling lists where the focus is support and community, the Always Learning list digs into the inner workings of parenting practices. The list discussion focuses on what helps and hinders learning and relationships.
Everyone who posts -- whether a question or a reply -- should want to see their ideas analyzed under an unschooling light.
The list thrives on unschooling questions and discussion! :-) But it's also perfectly okay to sit back and follow the discussion. (All new members are encouraged to do just that for awhile to get a feel for the list.)
Many find the analysis helps them clear out hidden baggage, think more clearly and become the radical unschooling parents they want to be. Some find it uncomfortable.
If you’re new to the idea of radical unschooling, there is some great information at http://sandradodd.com/beginning Especially helpful is Pam Laricchia's introductory email series that's linked there.
If Always Learning sounds like a list you'd like to try reply "Yes". If not, reply "No," so your request can be removed from the pending queue and best wishes in your unschooling and finding a list that fits your unschooling needs.
Thanks!
Always Learning
===============================
Joyce
Sandra Dodd
-=-Everyone who requests to join Always Learning gets an email describing what the list is about. Ideally no one should be let onto the list until they've read the description and replied.
-=-But many people don't reply. Even though the 1st 2 words of the subject are a bold PLEASE REPLY. -=-
I suppose some or many reply without reading the e-mail.
I VERY MUCH appreciate your attention to that, Joyce—to helping people understand the discussion.
For anyone who’s here who didn’t read, or read quickly, tomorrow there will be a scheduled reminder. Probably people ignore that, too. :-) But even people who have been here a while might get a good idea or some inspiration from reading the introductory materials.
Notes on the Always Learning list, linked from the facebook group’s main page:
http://sandradodd.com/lists/alwayslearning
Two links in the upper right of that page:
For New Members of the Always Learning List
http://sandradodd.com/lists/alwayslearningNEW
About posting to the list
http://sandradodd.com/lists/alwayslearningPOSTS
I DO really love this group. :-)
I don’t really love telling people no, wrong, read the intro, please post clearly, and only what will help lots of unschoolers with unschooling.
Sandra
-=-But many people don't reply. Even though the 1st 2 words of the subject are a bold PLEASE REPLY. -=-
I suppose some or many reply without reading the e-mail.
I VERY MUCH appreciate your attention to that, Joyce—to helping people understand the discussion.
For anyone who’s here who didn’t read, or read quickly, tomorrow there will be a scheduled reminder. Probably people ignore that, too. :-) But even people who have been here a while might get a good idea or some inspiration from reading the introductory materials.
Notes on the Always Learning list, linked from the facebook group’s main page:
http://sandradodd.com/lists/alwayslearning
Two links in the upper right of that page:
For New Members of the Always Learning List
http://sandradodd.com/lists/alwayslearningNEW
About posting to the list
http://sandradodd.com/lists/alwayslearningPOSTS
I DO really love this group. :-)
I don’t really love telling people no, wrong, read the intro, please post clearly, and only what will help lots of unschoolers with unschooling.
Sandra
Sandra Dodd
Years ago, every response in a discussion was new, when we didn’t have a good way to link to older discussions in message boards, or when our platforms disappeared more quickly. Now, with Joyce’s site and mine being collections of some of the good parts of many past discussions, it’s a bit like a dispensary / pharmacy / apothecary, where people describe a problem and we prescribe links for them to read. So I DO hope that people ARE going to the links.
In side discussions (which I don’t like—I’m not inviting more side discussions), there were some posts not allowed through. The mom will stay in the discussion, and I think things will become more fluid and peaceful for her. So I don’t want anyone to claim these quotes, ever. Let them be “once upon a time there was a family…” examples and let them slide into history.
But first, a look and some prescriptions.
-=-has been similar with games for many years and has been banned more than once for months. He also has been very defiant in doing as I ask and from a young age would rather stay home even when fun places are suggested.-=-
Wanting to stay home shouldn’t be seen as defiance.
If home is the best place to be, be glad to have a home!
http://sandradodd.com/being/home.html
With a reminder that the stories are about before the family heard of unschooling, and this was not done by an unschooler…
-=-has been similar with games for many years and has been banned more than once for months.-=-
If someone toook my computer away from me, I would rather stay home than go out with her, I bet.
If someone took anything from me for months, I would probably become defiant.
Being adversarial creates losers. When a parent loses to a child, or a child loses to a parent, I’m going to count that as three losses—each person loses, and their chance of being partners takes another hit.
http://sandradodd.com/partners/child
More, in another post.
Sandra
In side discussions (which I don’t like—I’m not inviting more side discussions), there were some posts not allowed through. The mom will stay in the discussion, and I think things will become more fluid and peaceful for her. So I don’t want anyone to claim these quotes, ever. Let them be “once upon a time there was a family…” examples and let them slide into history.
But first, a look and some prescriptions.
-=-has been similar with games for many years and has been banned more than once for months. He also has been very defiant in doing as I ask and from a young age would rather stay home even when fun places are suggested.-=-
Wanting to stay home shouldn’t be seen as defiance.
If home is the best place to be, be glad to have a home!
http://sandradodd.com/being/home.html
With a reminder that the stories are about before the family heard of unschooling, and this was not done by an unschooler…
-=-has been similar with games for many years and has been banned more than once for months.-=-
If someone toook my computer away from me, I would rather stay home than go out with her, I bet.
If someone took anything from me for months, I would probably become defiant.
Being adversarial creates losers. When a parent loses to a child, or a child loses to a parent, I’m going to count that as three losses—each person loses, and their chance of being partners takes another hit.
http://sandradodd.com/partners/child
More, in another post.
Sandra
Sandra Dodd
I posted this in the discussion:
__________
Tonight, working on something unrelated, I found this:
http://sandradodd.com/limits/listening
It’s from a discussion in which a mom wanted to keep a child from listening to audiobooks so much.
It’s not so much about what a child would be doing, but why a parent would want to stop him. Learning doesn’t always show.
___________
On the side, the mom who had recommneded limiting video games to two hours a day, the same mom who had removed access to games for months (more than once, perhaps) wrote this:
-=-My son listens to audiobooks ALL the time...do you think it's ok for children to barely go out and spend each day on computer games then?-=-
The elipsis was in the original. I didn’t leave anything out.
And, a reminder that this is prior to any understanding of unschooling.
When a question is asked in so defensive a way, in such a leading way, the mom should first relax.
http://sandradodd.com/breathing
The ideas there will do anyone good. Me, twice yesterday—once when I was seeing that my projects were piling up faster than I could complete them even if I stopped eating and sleeping, and once when I DID try to sleep and was having a hard time.
What I think, of the question above, is that video games are more stimulating and are likely to produce more learning and joy than the best of audiobooks. If it’s okay to listen to audiobooks all the time, but NOT okay to play video games for more than two hours, this shows fear and prejudice (and lack of knowledge) on the part of the mom. Deschooling could change everything for her (and I’ve already sent links to some good information on the side, for deschooling and moving into unschooling).
If audiobooks are being listened to outside, then maybe this mom’s insistence that every person must be outside every day or health is lost could be achieved in a two-for-one way. But some people live where it’s way too hot to be outside much every day. Some are in winter where it’s too cold. Some are in a dangerous urban area, and outside isn’t a daily thing. Some have houses with big sunny windows, screened porches, patios.
Principles are better than rules.
http://sandradodd.com/rules
Learning is better than control.
http://sandradodd.com/control
One person cannot “balance” another person’s life. Control works against relationships, against peace, and against learning.
http://sandradodd.com/balance
Worshipping books as a form, and a source, will work against unschooling. It will work against a person’s learning about learning.
http://sandradodd.com/bookworship
Some of those pages aren’t good on a phone. Readers view will give you 150 words or so, but there’s much more there. People who want to use this group as a resource for REALLY learning lots more about unschooling will probably do best to use a computer, rather than trying to rely on a hand-held quick-reference version.
One last thing, in one more message.
Sandra
__________
Tonight, working on something unrelated, I found this:
http://sandradodd.com/limits/listening
It’s from a discussion in which a mom wanted to keep a child from listening to audiobooks so much.
It’s not so much about what a child would be doing, but why a parent would want to stop him. Learning doesn’t always show.
___________
On the side, the mom who had recommneded limiting video games to two hours a day, the same mom who had removed access to games for months (more than once, perhaps) wrote this:
-=-My son listens to audiobooks ALL the time...do you think it's ok for children to barely go out and spend each day on computer games then?-=-
The elipsis was in the original. I didn’t leave anything out.
And, a reminder that this is prior to any understanding of unschooling.
When a question is asked in so defensive a way, in such a leading way, the mom should first relax.
http://sandradodd.com/breathing
The ideas there will do anyone good. Me, twice yesterday—once when I was seeing that my projects were piling up faster than I could complete them even if I stopped eating and sleeping, and once when I DID try to sleep and was having a hard time.
What I think, of the question above, is that video games are more stimulating and are likely to produce more learning and joy than the best of audiobooks. If it’s okay to listen to audiobooks all the time, but NOT okay to play video games for more than two hours, this shows fear and prejudice (and lack of knowledge) on the part of the mom. Deschooling could change everything for her (and I’ve already sent links to some good information on the side, for deschooling and moving into unschooling).
If audiobooks are being listened to outside, then maybe this mom’s insistence that every person must be outside every day or health is lost could be achieved in a two-for-one way. But some people live where it’s way too hot to be outside much every day. Some are in winter where it’s too cold. Some are in a dangerous urban area, and outside isn’t a daily thing. Some have houses with big sunny windows, screened porches, patios.
Principles are better than rules.
http://sandradodd.com/rules
Learning is better than control.
http://sandradodd.com/control
One person cannot “balance” another person’s life. Control works against relationships, against peace, and against learning.
http://sandradodd.com/balance
Worshipping books as a form, and a source, will work against unschooling. It will work against a person’s learning about learning.
http://sandradodd.com/bookworship
Some of those pages aren’t good on a phone. Readers view will give you 150 words or so, but there’s much more there. People who want to use this group as a resource for REALLY learning lots more about unschooling will probably do best to use a computer, rather than trying to rely on a hand-held quick-reference version.
One last thing, in one more message.
Sandra
Sandra Dodd
One more bit to set out and provide a link for:
-=-... feel he'll become more depressed and not go out at all if I allow him to go on computer games all day…-=-
Two links for that:
Pam Sorooshian’s explanation of economics as relates to these thing:
http://sandradodd.com/t/economics
“If I let him…”
http://sandradodd.com/ifilet
Sandra
-=-... feel he'll become more depressed and not go out at all if I allow him to go on computer games all day…-=-
Two links for that:
Pam Sorooshian’s explanation of economics as relates to these thing:
http://sandradodd.com/t/economics
“If I let him…”
http://sandradodd.com/ifilet
Sandra