What's so harmful?

On the Transgender Questions facebook group, someone kept going on and on, about how "harmful" it could be, discussing this in public.

On the side I had been told that she had left one of the private secret groups in a huff, and come straight to my group. That's interesting. :-) So she might have had some of the frustration and fury still upon her when she showed up, but that's all the defense I will make of it. I don't want to name her name, so I'm not leaving a link, either. It doesn't matter who, it matters that it was written in public.

This group that you've created here is putting a bad taste in my mouth. It seems to be very slanted in opinions and some of the things being posted here can end up being very harmful. It's not sitting well with me at all. There are a lot of blanket statements being made here that do not apply to all trans kids.

Idk what your experiences are with trans people Sandra and how many you actually know irl or how much time you've actually put into researching and learning and getting to know trans kids and their families.... I know this group was made because of a couple people and there seems to be somewhat of an agenda being played here.

I wrote:

In a group with 44 members, 230+ people have read some of the posts. SOMEONE is needing more information than they already have. (that comment is here, and some of the others around it)

You honestly dont know the harmful information that could be used in a very negative way.

Especially with this being a Public page. There are a lot of people reading this that don't have good opinions of what we, as parents of trans kids, are doing to help our kids. There's a reason why the suicide rate for trans kids is 41%."

(there is other discussion in there between)

We are not talking about the people actually posting here. We are talking about this being a Public page that anyone can come and read. Hence the 200+ that Sandra mentioned reading these posts.

(someone confirmed parents are being silenced in private groups and info should be shared)

This is not in the same realm as unschooling, which is what Sandra is trying to do because really, that's about the only experience she has in moderating Facebook groups. Dealing with issues with trans children is not the same. You can find tons of information and support without making all these issues and discussions public and open for just anyone to read.

I've come to the conclusion on here that none of this really matters but yes, I did mean attempt. I'm pretty much done here. I've seen the way that you conduct things on other forums Sandra Dodd and honestly, I'm done with your bull shit. You act like such an expert on things and this is NOT something that you should be holding the reins on. You've proven many times on this page that you really don't know the first thing about trans kids and their families.

Someone wrote:
-=-Being transgender is a verifiable medical condition.-=-

I responded:
It seems to me that people are using Barbie dolls as diagnostic tools, and an attraction to high heels as medical evidence.

--It seems to me that people are using Barbie dolls as diagnostic tools, and an attraction to high heels as medical evidence.-- What exactly do you mean by that?

[Name of critic now anonymous], instead of adults telling kids that it's quite normal for kids to like all kinds of different toys and clothes, the kids are reporting their preferences, and adults are telling them they were actually a girl, then, or a boy.

A boy who likes Barbie dolls and a girl who likes toy trucks are being promised they can have the other body, it seems, when it would be safer and easier to get them whatever toys they want and let them wear what they want to.

Me:
What is the scientific test for transgender? Blood test? Urine? Brainscan? It's talk of desires and preferences, as far as I know. Of wanting to be something different or of feeling or knowing. And the narrative presented as evidence involves... what sorts of things?

(Now-anonymous critic):
Because making comments like that is, in fact, harmful to the trans community and youth. Do you realize that THAT is the sort of thinking and opinions that parents of trans kids face on a constant basis? And why we are so defensive? Because, no, playing with certain toys or having certain interests do NOT make us parents run to the doc and say "My kid must be trans! They like Barbies!". That IS a ridiculous comment. I will not get into the actual, real struggles that my child has faced on a public forum but it sure as hell isn't because he was interested in "boy toys".

And this is exactly what I was talking about when I said someone like you, with no experience having a trans child or being heavily involved in the trans community, should be moderating a forum like this.

If hobbies, interests, clothes, preferences and aversions have nothing to do with it and I'm ridiculous, then what does evidence look like? Because people have pointed out to me in particular stories, "Oh, sure, ever since he was little, look...." and it's about interests and aversions.

If I name the people then they could be called ridiculous and danger too, maybe, but that's not answering any questions.

Me:
Who should be moderating a forum like this? Most people are afraid to say or ask anything for fear of losing their jobs, or being treated horribly.

-=-...and spout off opinions with no factual data to back it up?-=-

WHEN someone said "Most" or "none" I asked for backup. It was a statement of statistics I wanted evidence for.

When I asked what the hormones were, how they were made, and got answers on other topics, I asked for a return to the question.

I wanted a list of questions and then factual responses from people across the spectrum of opinion, so that there could be a neutral discussion, not polarized and private ranty discussions.

Perhaps what I want can't be had.

What is it they will hope to see?

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