Overcoming Pressure from Conservative Christians to Spank

Parenting in Jesus' Footsteps

Hi Sandra,

I just heard about your website at Mothering.com and so I came over to check it out. I'm so glad you are addressing the problems of the Pearls and other Christians who advocate spanking children. It's a big problem, much bigger than most people realize.

You might want to add my website to the others you have that are Christian and anti-spanking: http://www.parentinginjesusfootsteps.org/

We have a petition on the site too:

May you be blessed in your work,

Sue Lawrence

Christians for Nonviolent Parenting

Christians for Nonviolent Parenting is also linked from the nospank.net site, but I thought Christians who come here might want reassurance that there is good Biblical support for being gentle and kind to their children.


Christian Unschooling: Encouragement and resources for Christian unschooling, relaxed/eclectic home educating families–living in freedom in Christ.

Most other parents can get nonspanking support, it isn't readily available within conservative christian realms....it's encouraged and even pushed.


Ren, I just had to share. I was given a wooden spoon as a baby shower gift for my second child. I almost fell over! They even scheduled a talk on "how to use it biblically" during the shower. Can you imagine!? I was horrified!

Unfortunately, we did spank off and on (mostly off) for the first several years of parenting. It has never worked for us. But we were repeatedly convinced that we must use it.

Now, we don't and it's great to feel fine about it.


Absolutely true. I was hounded for years because I didn't spank Lanora, was given many dire predictions, mainly that she would grow up to be a brat. The fact that she was honest, calm, polite, enjoyed being with me and other adults only seemed to make it worse.

Unschooling and the progression towards no punishment eventually made it almost impossible for me to continue in the company of these people. It was a good move in the long run, I've since found dear friends who have made my life and Lanora's so much richer, some Christians, some just spiritual.

Kris (Louiseam)

In response to "Let's not forget that different people have different ideas of abuse" :

Only regarding children.

No one would consider it acceptable if I spanked, yanked or swatted an elderly parent in my care.

No one would think it was ok if I spanked or swatted a coworker, doctor, teacher, or bus driver if they were not behaving the way I liked. No one would think it was ok if a man turned his wife over his knee in Wal-mart and let her have it.

That's abuse. But the littlest people can get that treatment and we're still calling it parenting.


This page will be added to as other sources are discovered, and if any reader knows a good website or book or wants to offer a personal testimonial, write to [email protected].

More on not spanking and on other parenting issues for unschoolers
Being a mindful parent —learning to be thoughtful and calm and present with your child Parenting Peacefully