Toney , Cynthia Hammontree

Hello everyone, is this a group to get helpful advice??? If so I need some help. I'm thinking about unschooling my 2 boys ages 14 & 16. I've never tried this before. We have used Abeka, Bob Jones, made my own curriculum, & now using Switched on Schoolhouse. I have heard that unschooling is where you just let them learn what they want to learn, is this correct? If so how do you get 2 teen boys to learn when they are not going to choose to learn anything unless they are made. How do you teach them math or english? They ask me all the time why do they have to learn the things that Switched on Schoolhouse is trying to teach them when they don't see they are ever going to use it in life, especially the History lessons. This is just a few questions I'm concerned with. Any help would be greatful, Cynthia


---------------------------------
Yahoo! Shopping
Find Great Deals on Holiday Gifts at Yahoo! Shopping

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Joanne

Hello and welcome Cynthia...

If you're interested in unschooling, I suggest reading some of the
older posts on this list. You'll find a lot of information.
May I also suggest http://www.unschooling.info/
Take some time and let it sink in.
I think the first step, at least for me, was changing my way of
thinking.


~ Joanne ~
Mom to Jacqueline (7), Shawna (10) & Cimion (13)
Adopted into our hearts October 30, 2003
http://anunschoolinglife.blogspot.com/

Alyce

--- In [email protected], "Toney , Cynthia
Hammontree" <ushamntres@y...> wrote:
If so how do you get 2 teen boys to learn when they are not going to
choose to learn anything unless they are made.

Why should they need to learn things that don't interest them? If
they memorize the stuff for the sake of passing a test, it will be
forgotten soon after. Anything that matters to them will stick.

>>How do you teach them math or english?

You don't teach them. They learn it just by being awake, reading,
talking to people, watching TV. I'd be willing to guess they speak
and understand the language pretty well at this point. I'd also be
willing to guess they know enough math to balance a checkbook and
take care of other daily tasks that adults deal with. If they
should develop an interest in rocket science and decide to pursue
that, they'll be exposed to, and learn, very high level math by
virtue of the need to use it in their exploration of that. If they
like building things, they'll use geometry without necessarily
labeling it as such. Anything they need to learn or know to
function and pursue their true interests will come into play. If
they have no interest in anything requiring more than the ability to
count their money, they really don't need to learn it, do they? Do
you sit around writing up geometric proofs in your daily life? I
don't! :)

>>They ask me all the time why do they have to learn the things that
Switched on Schoolhouse is trying to teach them when they don't see
they are ever going to use it in life, especially the History
lessons.

I hated history too until I got the History channel and read some
really well-written books that included history as part of the
story. I remember those things I picked up there, but not the stuff
I had to memorize in school.

It's about learning what interests you, and remembering same. You
don't need to memorize a bunch of stuff that doesn't apply to you.

I am sure others will respond to this much better than I did. :)

~Alyce

Robyn Coburn

<<<<I hated history too until I got the History channel and read some
really well-written books that included history as part of the
story. I remember those things I picked up there, but not the stuff
I had to memorize in school. >>>>

A great book on this is "Lies My Teacher Told Me" (also available as a
book-on-tape lecture series), a very interesting critique of the teaching of
History in school, and of history text books. It includes a lot of
fascinating, and very new to me as a non-American, history by way of
illustrating the negatives of the teaching and the political agendas behind
text book writing.

One of the things that the author notes is just how much real and vivid
depictions of history, a vibrant branch of study at higher levels of
academia than high school, are enjoyed and sought after by adults. The
History Channel and all kinds of historical dramas are so hugely popular.

I didn't like history in school either - why? Because I could never get a
handle on what the assessors wanted in our essays. I could write an English
or art history essay to get 90's, but my results in history were less good.
Now that there is no test to pass, I am freed to truly enjoy it. It is a
huge collection of topics really, not just one homogenous subject.

Robyn L. Coburn

--
No virus found in this outgoing message.
Checked by AVG Free Edition.
Version: 7.1.371 / Virus Database: 267.13.13/199 - Release Date: 12/13/2005

Deb

--- In [email protected], "Alyce" <alyce13j@y...>
wrote:
>
> I am sure others will respond to this much better than I did. :)
>
> ~Alyce
>
You go girl - you did a fine job explaining things Alyce

--Deb

Robyn Coburn

<<<< If so how do you get 2 teen boys to learn when they are not going to
choose to learn anything unless they are made. >>>>>

One of the first steps is to do some reading on the nature of real learning.
I suggest Frank Smith "The Book of Learning and Forgetting", maybe Daniel
Pink "Free Agent Nation", John Holt anything and, especially as your kids
are teens, "The Teenage Liberation Handbook".

I suspect that when you write "learn anything" what you mean is "learn
certain overtly academic stuff that I approve of and is at least
commensurate with, if not surpassing, the standards of the public schools in
my State".

I suspect that when you write "not going to choose to learn anything" you
may mean not choose to "memorize to the tests at the end of the chapter" or
"be able to recite information to my satisfaction".

Please head on over to www.sandradodd.com/unschooling and read there. Also
follow the link to Joyce Fetterol's beautiful site.

<<<<<How do you teach them math or english? They ask me >>>>>

Well if they are speaking to you I guess they are a long way forward on
learning English....seriously one of the big parts of Unschooling is
focusing on what is great about our kids, what they are doing and achieving
for themselves, rejoicing in their unique brilliances, supporting their
definitions of success and aspirations - not seeing their educational
"deficits" in terms of subjects that need your attention to redress.

Lots of reading. Enjoy!

Robyn L. Coburn



--
No virus found in this outgoing message.
Checked by AVG Free Edition.
Version: 7.1.371 / Virus Database: 267.13.13/199 - Release Date: 12/13/2005

simplemom3

If so how do you get 2 teen boys to learn when they are not going to
choose to learn anything unless they are made.

Cynthia,
Go to www.unschooling.com and click on the side bar that says "articles
and essays." There is some very enlightening reading material there
that will help you to understand what "unschooling" is to everyday life
circumstances. Sandra Dodd also has a website with tons of great stuff
on it. Just google "understanding unschooling" and you will get a
treasure-trove of hits.

Hope this helps.

Sharon

Joyce Fetteroll

On Dec 13, 2005, at 11:00 AM, Toney , Cynthia Hammontree wrote:

> I have heard that unschooling is where you just let them learn what
> they want to learn, is this correct?

Yes, except that the learning looks different than it does when
they're doing school.

In a way it looks like weekends and summer vacation except without
the avoiding things that look like something they might be made to do
in school ;-)


> If so how do you get 2 teen boys to learn when they are not going
> to choose to learn anything unless they are made.

If you were to start right now, yes, they will avoid learning
anything that, to them, reminds them of something they would be made
to learn.

First they would need to deschool (or deprogram as someone recently
called it.)

They would need to gain confidence that they won't be made to learn
something they don't want to, and gain confidence that if they do
pick up something that might be learned in school that they can do so
without anyone commenting or breathing a sigh of relief ;-) and they
can put it down also without comment or tension.

They would need time to catch up on all the living they've had to set
aside for school work. Imagine if someone made you spend your time
doing things you felt were pointless and only let you read for 10
minutes a week (or something else you love). And then they removed
all restrictions and you could do whatever you wanted. It would take
a long time to get your fill of reading :-)

They also need time for things that are taught in school to loose
that patina of boring that school (and school work) paints them with.
They need time to discover those same things within and through
things they already love.

Rule of thumb is 1 month for each year they've been schooled.

> How do you teach them math or english?

You don't. They learn by using it.

How did they learn to talk? Did you teach them? All they did was live
life and use English as a tool to get what they wanted. Saying "Ook"
for milk worked better than crying. :-) And they get better at it as
a side effect of using it.

> They ask me all the time why do they have to learn the things that
> Switched on Schoolhouse is trying to teach them when they don't see
> they are ever going to use it in life, especially the History
> lessons. This is just a few questions I'm concerned with. Any help
> would be greatful, Cynthia

And parents and teachers have been lying to kids for *years* trying
to convince them that it's because they'll need it in the future even
if they can't see that now.

If you honestly look back and think of all the things you learned
that you've never had to use, you can see how big of a lie that is.
What you *do* need are the things that you use. And you get better at
them, again, as a side effect of using them.

No one needs to learn to be a gourmet cook in order to start cooking.
You just start and make mistakes and learn what you need as you need
it. Same with everything. :-)

How do boys (usually! ;-) learn to work on cars? By messing around
with them. By reading about them. By talking to other people about
them. No one needs to make them learn. They keep pulling themself
along through new territory because it's interesting. They learn new
things because they're interesting and they need something to
understand something even more interesting. It's like building a
foundation beneath you as you go along and then you look down and
you're ten stories up in the air without realizing how you got there :-)

But unschooling is much more than just stopping school. It takes
being your child's partner in helping *them* get where *they* want to
go, do what *they* want to do. It takes parents being interested in
life just because they think it's interesting.

Joyce

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

Welcome Cynthia. I'm glad you found your way here.

>>I'm thinking about unschooling my 2 boys ages 14 & 16. I've never tried this before.>>

We all had to start someplace. I gave a talk a few years ago about my journey to understanding unschooling. It may help you now. Here's the link: http://sandradodd.com/gold/journey

>>I have heard that unschooling is where you just let them learn what they want to learn, is this correct?>>

Unschooling is supporting them in their learning. It's understanding that we are all hard wired to learn new things and children and teenagers are no different. The learning won't look like schoolwork but that's okay. Schoolwork is irrelevant outside of school. We surround our children with an interesting, supportive, engaging life and help them pursue their interests wherever they lead.

>>How do you teach them math or english? >>

We all learn by doing and reading and experiencing and playing with and trying and asking and watching and thinking.
--
~Mary, unschooling mom to Conor (16) and Casey (11)

"Just today I'm going to be utterly present for my children, I'm going to be in their world (not just doing my own thing while they do theirs), I'm going to really hear them, I'm going to prepare myself to be present starting right now."
~Ren Allen




[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Lesa McMahon-Lowe

Did anyone mention the Teenagers Liberation Handbook to Cynthia?

Here's the link at Amazon.com for it... http://www.amazon
com/gp/product/0962959170/qid=1134736627/sr=8-1/ref=sr_8_xs_ap_i1_xgl14/102-4
88483-9062532?n=507846&s=books&v=glance

Lesa
-------Original Message-------


On Dec 13, 2005, at 11:00 AM, Toney , Cynthia Hammontree wrote:

> If so how do you get 2 teen boys to learn when they are not going
> to choose to learn anything unless they are made.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

-----Original Message-----
From: Toney , Cynthia Hammontree ushamntres@...

Hello everyone, is this a group to get helpful advice???
-=-=-=-
We like to think so.
-=-=-=-=-
If so I need some
help. I'm thinking about unschooling my 2 boys ages 14 & 16. I've never tried
this before. We have used Abeka, Bob Jones, made my own curriculum, & now using
Switched on Schoolhouse. I have heard that unschooling is where you just let
them learn what they want to learn, is this correct?
-=-=-=-
You might want to do some side reading along with this list. Most of these books are in your library:
Frank Smith's _The Book of Learning and Forgetting_
John Taylor Gatto's _Dumbing Us Down_ and _The Underground History of American Education_
Daniel Pink's _Free Agent Nation_
Grace Llewellyn's _The Teenage Liberation Handbook_
Mary Griffith's _The Unschooling Handbook_
All books by John Holt, the father of unschooling (I suggest reading them all, in order, so you can watch
him leave school reform and start touting unschooling. Others say just _Learning All the Time_)

These books are new and probably NOT in your library---all are available from the authors---just google:
Valerie Fitzenreiter's _The Unprocessed Child_ Sandra Dodd's _Moving a Puddle and Other Essays_ And my favorite, Rue Kream's _Parenting a Free Child, an Unschooled Life_ There are two magazines: _Life Learning_ and _Live Free Learn Free_ both devoted to unschooling. Websites: www.SandraDodd.com www.borntoexplore.com Joyce's (Sorry---I don't know that one by heart---help?!)-=-=-=-
If so how do you get 2 teen boys to learn when they are not going to choose to learn anything unless they
are made.
-=-=-=-=-
You first change your thinking! Teenage boys naturally LOVE to learn. Unfortunately, Bob Jones and ABeka
can turn even the most avid learner against learning ANYTHING! They need time to heal--to deschool or
deprogram from all that drivel. What are their passions?

-=-=-=-
How do you teach them math or english?
-=-=-=-
By living a life full of both. You "teach" by example---by modelling the behavior you'd like to see. Are
YOU interested in math and english? Do you get into fractions and percentages? Do you talk about adverbs
and noun clauses. Not unless you need/want to is my guess. They're no different.

Mostly I think they already KNOW english! They probably already know most of the math they'll ever need.

Do you think they need to know *everything* before they're 18? Did *you*?

They have their whole lives ahead of them! Real learners never stop learning! Unless forced to learn---
THAT's a real turn-off!

-=-=-=-=-
They ask me all the time why do
they have to learn the things that Switched on Schoolhouse is trying to teach
them when they don't see they are ever going to use it in life, especially the
History lessons.
-=-=-=-=-=-
Smart boys!

You may find that they already have a passion for a certain time in history (my 17 year old is really
into the '60s and 70's right now (wow---my life as history! <g>), it just may not be Elizabethan England
or The Russian Revolution. History's a BIG subject. They'll find parts of it when they're ready. History
of art or weapons or cultures or war or fashion or architecture---it's ALL related, really!

Unschooling IS about letting them learn what they want to learn. But it's MUCH more than that. It's also
about respecting them and their choices and trusting that they are learning creatures who are naturally
curious about their world. It's about not forcing them to learn what isn't interesting to them *now*. It's
about believeing that they *will* learn in time all they'll need to know.

It's harder than it sounds! <G> Because, as parents, it means challenging ourselves every day to trust,
respect, and believe in our children to a higher degree than other parents. It's so simple when you
finally understand it, but it takes a while to get there! You NEED to trust them---and that's not something
our culture/society likes! It's going against the mainstream. Unschooling's not for every parent. Every
CHILD can THRIVE---but it's a hurdle for most parents!

Any other questions? <g>
~Kelly


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]


Rebecca DeLong

Rue, can your book only be ordered online, or can you get it from Borders?

We don't have a credit card and I'm having a hard time finding it at a store.

Thanx

~Rebecca





You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocketship underpants don't help."
-Calvin





---------------------------------
Yahoo! for Good - Make a difference this year.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Deb

--- In [email protected], Rebecca DeLong
<elfmama_2@y...> wrote:
>
>
> Rue, can your book only be ordered online, or can you get it from
>Borders?
>
> We don't have a credit card and I'm having a hard time finding it
at a store.
>
> Thanx
>
> ~Rebecca
>
You can probably just send a check to Rue and she'd send the book -
email her at rue@... and I'm sure you can arrange
something - right Rue?

--Deb

Rue Kream

>>right Rue?

**Yup :o). ~Rue

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Toney , Cynthia Hammontree

Hello, I've been reading post now for a while and have questions. I think I'd like to try unschooling but have no idea how to do this. Can someone give me a lesson plan type of thing for the day or week so I can get an idea of how unschooling is done? How do they learn math and english? Any other advice will be appreciated!!
Thanks, Cynthia


---------------------------------
Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. Make PC-to-Phone Calls to the US (and 30+ countries) for 2¢/min or less.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Michelle Leifur Reid

On 9/4/06, Toney , Cynthia Hammontree <ushamntres@...> wrote:
> Can someone give me a lesson plan type of thing for the day or week so I can get an idea of how unschooling is done? How do they learn math and english? Any other advice will be appreciated!!
> Thanks, Cynthia
>


Cynthia, have you read any of the articles at
http://www.sandradodd.com/unschooling ? There are quite a few
articles there about how people learn math and English without having
a lesson plan. Every unschooling family is going to look different.
There is no "lesson plan" or "checklist" to unschooling. The first
thing I would do is to deschool. Some children will deschool quickly
while other children will take months or years to get to a point where
they can trust that you aren't going to "go back to the old way." You
and any other adults in your house are also going to have to deschool
yourselves. You've most likely had 12+ years of schooling yourself
and you have to get rid of that schoolishness, too. I would also look
at some unschooling books and see what "the experts" have to say.
There is no blueprint. Start finding ways to say yes more and no less
and help your children discover their passions while you work to
discover your passions at the same time.

--
Michelle
Michelle Leifur Reid
YOUR Pampered Chef Consultant
850-474-0817
http://www.pamperedchef.biz/michellelr
Check out my homeschool cooking classes!

Solé

Hello Cynthia,

well lesson plan... unschooling is about *not* having them. But there
are still some helpful texts to get you started:

I find this very helpful: http://home.earthlink.net/%7Efetteroll/
rejoycing/ (Joyce Fetteroll)

(it's a loooot to read though and quite overwhelming!)

Then there is Scott, for changing they way you look at your
children :-) In the "Title list" you find all the articles, and if
you open them from bottom to top, you can kind of do the "lessons"
one by one. He often says in a post "Today, do xxx..." But this is
more for YOU, I think. http://www.enjoyparenting.com/

There is Sandra: http://sandradodd.com/ even more to read! (but to
start I'd try Joyce Fetteroll :-))

And this: http://sandradodd.com/strewing might be quite helpful to
understand unschooling

and Ren: learninginfreedom.com, describing the "stages" of
unschooling :-)

And what people have been told me here is to not say "we're
unschooling now, there are no limits, no bedtimes, you are free to do
whatever you want", cause that causes chaos :-) Start saying "yes" a
lot more (Joyce describes how you can do this even though you
actually want to say no, there are different kinds of yeses :-)...
and you'll see what happens.

My daughter is 7 and she got it pretty quickly that something had
changed and so we had a little chaos for a few days, but now it's
already great!

Thank you all, by the way - again :-)

greetings
Johanna





> Hello, I've been reading post now for a while and have questions. I
> think I'd like to try unschooling but have no idea how to do this.
> Can someone give me a lesson plan type of thing for the day or week
> so I can get an idea of how unschooling is done? How do they learn
> math and english? Any other advice will be appreciated!!
> Thanks, Cynthia
>
>

Elissa Jill Cleaveland

Here's your lesson plan to start.
Wake up early. (or not.)
Have some breakfast (or not)
Take a walk (or not)
Watch TV (or not)
Play a board game (or not)
Do the breakfast dishes(or not)
head out to a park(or not)
Swing by the consignment shop(or not)
Stop at the new Thai place for some lemon grass soup(or not)
head home to make your own lemon grass soup(or not)
Try some fresh figs at the local farmers market while picking up lemon grass(or not)
Head home to google lemon grass soup and raising your own figs(or not)
Watch Black Beauty(or not)
realize that you've read this recently and search the house for the book(or not)
help little one read the words on his Pokemon video game for the Fifty-eleventh time.(or not)
Kvetch about the rain to no one in particular(or not)
Decide to splash in the puddles(or not).

Beginning to move away from school is like the first day of summer break. Relax, have fun. Look at the world with eyes open to all the possibilities that are out there. What is out there is not "Math" or "Social Studies". What's out there IS numbers and time and distance and making more or less. It's interacting with people, exploring the neighborhood, chatting about the person running for county commisioner and does she really want "open space" and what does that mean? Does that mean helping the farmers to maintain their livelihoods or does it mean a new development of not less than 5 acres per parcel?
Life. your children and you are ready to live life, not live school.
For the next few months just Be. Explore, look for Joy. stay curious. Find things that interest you such as knitting, cooking, reading junk books, watching the entire run of Friends, starting a BeeHive, grab your old guitar and head to a local Open Mike night, bake a loaf of bread, whatever.
Do things with your kids, Do some things without your kids. Find your own passions. Dabble.
Most of all, read here:
www.sandradodd.com
and here:
www.unschooling.info
and here:
www.yahoogroups.com/unschoolingbasics (read the archives)
Have a wonderful time.

Elissa Jill
A Kindersher saychel iz oychet a saychel.
"A Child's wisdom is also wisdom." ~Yiddish Proverb

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Toney , Cynthia Hammontree

Wow Elissa & Johanna, you really know how to put it. I think you broke down unschooling in a marvelous way. I have been homeschooling for many years now and spoke to several people last year about unschooling but I just couldn't understand how they would do math or Grammar/Language. We kind of done school similiar to unschooling last year. I guess we formally homeschooled for about 4 months last year using S.O.S and it was too tedious for the boys so we unschooled for the remainder of the year. I was scared because I kept wondering what can they possibly be learning. Both boys want to hunt, fish, ride 4 wheelers, drive the jeep in the pasture, & talk on the phone. They do not like video games or t.v. very much. The youngest likes working on things that has wheels...because he likes to drive. Oh, they both have full time jobs also. They work with a friend of our in a scrap yard doing odds and ends. Everyone around here knows they homeschool so if little odd jobs need to be
done they call on the boys. After they have worked a long, hot or cold day they want to come home and do their own thing, not schoolwork. Thanks to both of you for the wonderful sites. I'll be reading, searching & looking for ways to have a fun unschooling time. Is anyone in the group close to the North Alabama area, including the tri-states?
Blessings, Cynthia


---------------------------------
Get your email and more, right on the new Yahoo.com

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]