Looking for some advice about focusing close and less broadly.
lisajceledon@...
I was writing in to lean a bit on other thriving models. What are some good tips for getting going again in the middle of a hard time in the family? It can be unspecific. There's lots around about happiness and hard times, I am looking for more about what people are thinking about it right now. Especially cultivating a detached cheerfulness when necessary (the fake it til you make it, I suppose it is, but well-grounded too). I'm doing well with the kids, but more looking to boost myself, since that helps everyone else too.
Thank you!
Lisa Celedon
Sandra Dodd
-=-There's lots around about happiness and hard times, I am looking for more about what people are thinking about it right now.-=-
Please clarify.
Do you mean about current international politics?
Be a mammal. Be like a mom fox, or mom monkey. Find a warm place to sleep. Watch for current danger. Groom your offspring. Share food with them.
They’re not watching the news.
If the question isn’t about current news, please clarify so others can give better answers.
And thanks for writing—this group let February pass without a real post. :-)
Sandra
Please clarify.
Do you mean about current international politics?
Be a mammal. Be like a mom fox, or mom monkey. Find a warm place to sleep. Watch for current danger. Groom your offspring. Share food with them.
They’re not watching the news.
If the question isn’t about current news, please clarify so others can give better answers.
And thanks for writing—this group let February pass without a real post. :-)
Sandra
Jo Isaac
==What are some good tips for getting going again in the middle of a hard time in the family?==
Get out of the house. Start a new (fun) book. Start watching a new (fun) show. Start a new project if you are crafty. Start a new exercise class. Learn something completely different.
Don't sit and dwell and stew.
Don't sit and dwell and stew.
From: [email protected] <[email protected]> on behalf of lisajceledon@... [AlwaysLearning] <[email protected]>
Sent: 11 March 2018 22:24
To: [email protected]
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Looking for some advice about focusing close and less broadly.
Sent: 11 March 2018 22:24
To: [email protected]
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Looking for some advice about focusing close and less broadly.
I was writing in to lean a bit on other thriving models. What are some good tips for getting going again in the middle of a hard time in the family? It can be unspecific. There's lots around about happiness and hard times, I am looking for more about what
people are thinking about it right now. Especially cultivating a detached cheerfulness when necessary (the fake it til you make it, I suppose it is, but well-grounded too). I'm doing well with the kids, but more looking to boost myself, since that helps everyone
else too.
Thank you!
Lisa Celedon
semajrak@...
***Especially cultivating a detached cheerfulness when necessary***
I don't think of it as a detached cheerfulness so much as attaching my attention to things that have the potential to bring me joy.
When things were a bit more difficult (we had moved, my dad died, Doug's new job wasn't going well, my mom's health was deteriorating, I was having some minor health issues myself) I would make sure to notice the moments in each day that were easier and simply beautiful even if there were only a few. In those easier moments I would say "thank you," sometimes aloud. In the simply beautiful moments I would say something to acknowledge the beauty. "This feels so good," was something I said (still say) a lot, again, sometimes aloud as both Doug and Ethan would confirm. ;-)
When things were a bit more difficult (we had moved, my dad died, Doug's new job wasn't going well, my mom's health was deteriorating, I was having some minor health issues myself) I would make sure to notice the moments in each day that were easier and simply beautiful even if there were only a few. In those easier moments I would say "thank you," sometimes aloud. In the simply beautiful moments I would say something to acknowledge the beauty. "This feels so good," was something I said (still say) a lot, again, sometimes aloud as both Doug and Ethan would confirm. ;-)
For example, if I was driving to the grocery store and I happened to notice how beautiful the clouds looked, I'd linger a moment longer to notice the relief I felt from simply observing that beautiful sky, and the feeling of joy that I could draw from that humble observation. It sounds kinda corny as I type this, but it was/is a really powerful tool for me. Noticing ease, noticing beauty and spending a moment to reflect on how good that can feel when I acknowledge it was/is a bit like remembering to breathe.
Another thing I do regularly is seek out activities that have the potential to bring me joy. For me, that's being with my family, being in nature, going on mini adventures, and making things. Going on mini adventures is especially effective at giving me a boost. Maybe that means going to a place close to home that I've never been before, or going at a time of day I've never been before. It could mean giving myself a silly challenge like finding as many round things as I can find around the house and taking pictures of them. Maybe I'll paint a few rocks and sneakily leave them for others to find. Being quietly playful and simply adventurous brings me a great deal of joy.
Tap in to the things that bring *you* joy and find ways to do more of them. Simple ways and bigger ways when you can. Make sure to take an extra moment notice that joy you feel. Let yourself savour it.
Karen James
Another thing I do regularly is seek out activities that have the potential to bring me joy. For me, that's being with my family, being in nature, going on mini adventures, and making things. Going on mini adventures is especially effective at giving me a boost. Maybe that means going to a place close to home that I've never been before, or going at a time of day I've never been before. It could mean giving myself a silly challenge like finding as many round things as I can find around the house and taking pictures of them. Maybe I'll paint a few rocks and sneakily leave them for others to find. Being quietly playful and simply adventurous brings me a great deal of joy.
Tap in to the things that bring *you* joy and find ways to do more of them. Simple ways and bigger ways when you can. Make sure to take an extra moment notice that joy you feel. Let yourself savour it.
Karen James
Crystal D'Angora
Thank you, Karen!
This is a perfect and beautiful reminder for us all, but especially as parents. It’s so easy to get wrapped up in noticing what is hard, what hurts, and where we need to grow. Taking the time for simple play and placing our attention on what is working, however, really does allow for more joy and for us to be with our children and ourselves in a refreshed and present way.
Gratitude!
Crystal D’Angora
--
Crystal D'Angora, MA, MFTi 46889
Crystalleedangora@...
cdguidance.com
818 439-4655
Sandra Dodd
-=-For example, if I was driving to the grocery store and I happened to notice how beautiful the clouds looked, I'd linger a moment longer to notice the relief I felt from simply observing that beautiful sky, and the feeling of joy that I could draw from that humble observation. It sounds kinda corny as I type this, but it was/is a really powerful tool for me. Noticing ease, noticing beauty and spending a moment to reflect on how good that can feel when I acknowledge it was/is a bit like remembering to breathe.-=-
Karen James wrote that.
It reminds me to share something I uploaded yesterday, and I’ll probably quote Karen on that page, maybe, I hope, later.
http://sandradodd.com/hsc/happiness
Probably I’ll add Karen’s here, instead, and make it an easier-to-find happiness page. Yeah. Sorry. I’m talking to myself. A couple of you might not mind overhearing my muttering. :-) Both pages are new this weekend.
Sandra
Karen James wrote that.
It reminds me to share something I uploaded yesterday, and I’ll probably quote Karen on that page, maybe, I hope, later.
http://sandradodd.com/hsc/happiness
Probably I’ll add Karen’s here, instead, and make it an easier-to-find happiness page. Yeah. Sorry. I’m talking to myself. A couple of you might not mind overhearing my muttering. :-) Both pages are new this weekend.
Sandra
Sandra Dodd
-=-
Probably I’ll add Karen’s here, instead, and make it an easier-to-find happiness page. Yeah. Sorry. I’m talking to myself. A couple of you might not mind overhearing my muttering. :-) Both pages are new this weekend.-=-
Where?
Here:
http://sandradodd.com/happiness
Probably I’ll add Karen’s here, instead, and make it an easier-to-find happiness page. Yeah. Sorry. I’m talking to myself. A couple of you might not mind overhearing my muttering. :-) Both pages are new this weekend.-=-
Where?
Here:
http://sandradodd.com/happiness
Sandra Dodd
If cheerfulness feels too far a stretch, maybe aim from calm.
http://sandradodd.com/calm
From calm to happy might be only a stap, not a leap.
Sandra
http://sandradodd.com/calm
From calm to happy might be only a stap, not a leap.
Sandra