Mary Hickcox

Amanda,
One thing I do in regards to chores is to keep them but change the way we approach them.  My boys like to earn money so we keep the usual chores (the ones they had before we embarked on this journey:) but they are not mandatory.  They haver the option of doing them if they want.  Usually in the beginning of the day I ask them if they want to do the chores today and they let me know.  Sometimes they change their minds and that is OK but I don''t want to do it if they were planning on it to earn money.  This has worked really well, they like having the option and we all like no arguing/yelling/etc to get them done in a "have to" way.  I also find that even for things not earning money they are more likely to help me out!  I also try to give them option about personal hygiene and even with boys they usually take enough showers or pool swimming.  When they feel dirty, they want the shower.  It is just a matter of letting go what is comfortable to us
and excepting that they have a different level of cleanliness:)  
Also if it is something like cleaning the room and it has gotten to where I am uncomfortable, I just clean it up a bit.  I do tell them to keep food/drink stuff out when done with them.  (we live in the tropics and the bugs/ants are amazingly aggressive:)  Other then that, they clean it when they are disgusted and if my disgusted level is before theirs I just straighten it up with no word!

Mary mama to Dylan (11), Colin (6 1/2) and Theo Benjamin (2 1/2)
"Be who you want your children to be."    Unknown   "Each morning we are born again.  What we do today is what matters most."    Buddha

"Men will never be free until the last king is strangled with the entrails of the last priest."
    Denis Diderot






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