Laundry and Cleaning Rooms
Amanda's Shoebox
We've been unschooling for a few months now. I'd like for our family to move to a more radical unschooling type of lifestyle. I've been practicing radical unschooling principles with my husband, although not as perfectly as I would like to, lol.
I've been racking my brain trying to figure out how to introduce the concepts to my husband in a practical way (he doesn't like to read, so I can't hand him a book or anything). After a situation where the girls forgot to give the dogs water and then hearing the girls argue about whose job it was to take out the trash, it hit me... chores! Get rid of the chores!
So, I talked with my husband, he said it was fine to give it a try and starting yesterday I took over their chores. Taking over feeding the dogs, dishes, taking out trash etc. is no problem. But the "personal chores" ... I'm not really sure how to handle them. Should I ask the girls to come get their clothes once I've folded/hung them or should I put their clothes away? Should I clean their rooms? Should I clean the bathroom and computer room that only they use? Or should I stay out of those spaces that are theirs and let them deal with them?
How do you all handle things like that? Oh, and our girls are 14, 13, and 10... the 10 and 13 year old share a room.
~ Amanda
I've been racking my brain trying to figure out how to introduce the concepts to my husband in a practical way (he doesn't like to read, so I can't hand him a book or anything). After a situation where the girls forgot to give the dogs water and then hearing the girls argue about whose job it was to take out the trash, it hit me... chores! Get rid of the chores!
So, I talked with my husband, he said it was fine to give it a try and starting yesterday I took over their chores. Taking over feeding the dogs, dishes, taking out trash etc. is no problem. But the "personal chores" ... I'm not really sure how to handle them. Should I ask the girls to come get their clothes once I've folded/hung them or should I put their clothes away? Should I clean their rooms? Should I clean the bathroom and computer room that only they use? Or should I stay out of those spaces that are theirs and let them deal with them?
How do you all handle things like that? Oh, and our girls are 14, 13, and 10... the 10 and 13 year old share a room.
~ Amanda
Su Penn
On May 1, 2010, at 1:29 PM, Amanda's Shoebox wrote:
I often ask the kids if they would like to do something. I don't say, for instance, "Eric, put your clothes away," but I often say, "I folded the clean laundry, it's on my bed, do you think you'll have a minute to put your stuff away?" or "It would be a big help if you'd take your dirty plate to the kitchen," or "I'm going to do laundry, would you like to take a minute and check your room for dirty clothes? You can just toss them in my hamper or put them in the hall outside your door."
Carl finds it easier to help than Eric does. On the other hand, as he approaches his ninth birthday Eric seems to be getting really interested in helping and in being independent (just now, when I complained that it was hard for me to watch our two-year-old and cook dinner at the same time, he offered to walk her to the park and push her on the swings. And now they've been gone long enough I finished getting my stew simmering and had time to check e-mail!). What I try to do is give them _opportunities_ to help, which they sometimes take and sometimes don't. At the same time, I offer my help. When there's something that needs to be done, we usually present a "helped by parent" version and a "do it self" version.
So it doesn't have to be, "This is always my job, and that is always your job." It's more fluid than that at our house.
Su, mom to Eric, 8; Carl, 6; Yehva, 2.5
tapeflags.blogspot.com
> But the "personal chores" ... I'm not really sure how to handle them. Should I ask the girls to come get their clothes once I've folded/hung them or should I put their clothes away? Should I clean their rooms? Should I clean the bathroom and computer room that only they use? Or should I stay out of those spaces that are theirs and let them deal with them?Have you thought about asking them what they prefer? They might like you to clean their rooms; they might prefer their privacy be respected even if it means their rooms get messy. They might like to take care of things themselves with the understanding that they can ask you for help if they need it.
I often ask the kids if they would like to do something. I don't say, for instance, "Eric, put your clothes away," but I often say, "I folded the clean laundry, it's on my bed, do you think you'll have a minute to put your stuff away?" or "It would be a big help if you'd take your dirty plate to the kitchen," or "I'm going to do laundry, would you like to take a minute and check your room for dirty clothes? You can just toss them in my hamper or put them in the hall outside your door."
Carl finds it easier to help than Eric does. On the other hand, as he approaches his ninth birthday Eric seems to be getting really interested in helping and in being independent (just now, when I complained that it was hard for me to watch our two-year-old and cook dinner at the same time, he offered to walk her to the park and push her on the swings. And now they've been gone long enough I finished getting my stew simmering and had time to check e-mail!). What I try to do is give them _opportunities_ to help, which they sometimes take and sometimes don't. At the same time, I offer my help. When there's something that needs to be done, we usually present a "helped by parent" version and a "do it self" version.
So it doesn't have to be, "This is always my job, and that is always your job." It's more fluid than that at our house.
Su, mom to Eric, 8; Carl, 6; Yehva, 2.5
tapeflags.blogspot.com
Sandra Dodd
My kids are scattered and doing their own laundry now, but when I did
it all, I would sort it into baskets and help the little kids put it
away, but for older kids would deliver the basket and say "Let me have
the basket back when you can." Sometimes that was within an hour.
Sometimes it was two days. My solution to that was to buy more
laundry baskets. Sometimes a kid would live out of the laundry basket
one week, and Marty sometimes still does for socks and underwear even
though he's doing his own laundry.
For a few years Holly and I would watch Desperate Housewives together
on Sunday nights and sort laundry together during commercials.
Sandra
it all, I would sort it into baskets and help the little kids put it
away, but for older kids would deliver the basket and say "Let me have
the basket back when you can." Sometimes that was within an hour.
Sometimes it was two days. My solution to that was to buy more
laundry baskets. Sometimes a kid would live out of the laundry basket
one week, and Marty sometimes still does for socks and underwear even
though he's doing his own laundry.
For a few years Holly and I would watch Desperate Housewives together
on Sunday nights and sort laundry together during commercials.
Sandra
Joyce Fetteroll
On May 1, 2010, at 1:29 PM, Amanda's Shoebox wrote:
to be no thanks. :-) My daughter nearly always helps when I ask.
Occasionally she'll say later. Occasionally she'll let me know she's
involved with something. But she's always been allowed to say no.
My mother swore her kids wouldn't have chores because of how much she
hated them as a kid. So she did it all. But she never invited us into
her world to be with her or help and be useful. Our "job" was to play.
Which was cool! But we were disconnected. And I think she was baffled
why we didn't spontaneously help when we were teens.
actually put the clothes away it will build resentment in you when
they don't. If you are fine with whatever system works for them then
why not. As Pam has said, don't set your kids up to fail.
If you're asking because you've done all the folding and in the back
of your mind you think they should do part of the job, then I'd work
on getting past that.
Invite one or more along to help fold. Tell stories, talk about stuff.
Or do it while you watch TV and ask if someone would like to do
something easy like matching socks. (Though tasks I thought were easy
weren't so easy before my daughter reached puberty. I think she'd get
overwhelmed by the size.)
deteriorate to the point of being overwhelming.
Offer as a gift to clean up. Let it be their space but do them the
favor of giving them order occasionally. They'll see your techniques
for tackling a big problem. They may not right now appreciate it as
much as the effort it takes, but that's because
1) it's not near the top of their priority list so while they will
probably appreciate the end result, the amount of work needed to get
it there is more than it's worth to them right now and
2) kids assume that adults never do anything they don't want to do so
clearning will seem like the way you want to spend your time. And
since adults don't have anyone telling them and making them, why would
kids assume what we do is anything but a free choice? And, really, it
is! Everything we do is a choice. Here's a good page:
http://sandradodd.com/haveto
Dawn Adams expressed cleaning up as like giving them a fresh canvas:
http://joyfullyrejoycing.com/influencing%20kid%20behavior/chores/convincingthemtopickup.html
There are several pages about chores if you scroll down the right hand
side.
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> Taking over feeding the dogs, dishes, taking out trash etc. is noDo invite one along to help or keep you company but allow the answer
> problem.
to be no thanks. :-) My daughter nearly always helps when I ask.
Occasionally she'll say later. Occasionally she'll let me know she's
involved with something. But she's always been allowed to say no.
My mother swore her kids wouldn't have chores because of how much she
hated them as a kid. So she did it all. But she never invited us into
her world to be with her or help and be useful. Our "job" was to play.
Which was cool! But we were disconnected. And I think she was baffled
why we didn't spontaneously help when we were teens.
> But the "personal chores" ... I'm not really sure how to handleDepends. It depends on your expectations. If you expect them to
> them. Should I ask the girls to come get their clothes once I've
> folded/hung them or should I put their clothes away?
actually put the clothes away it will build resentment in you when
they don't. If you are fine with whatever system works for them then
why not. As Pam has said, don't set your kids up to fail.
If you're asking because you've done all the folding and in the back
of your mind you think they should do part of the job, then I'd work
on getting past that.
Invite one or more along to help fold. Tell stories, talk about stuff.
Or do it while you watch TV and ask if someone would like to do
something easy like matching socks. (Though tasks I thought were easy
weren't so easy before my daughter reached puberty. I think she'd get
overwhelmed by the size.)
> Should I clean their rooms? Should I clean the bathroom and computerI suspect if you let them take care of them they won't and they'll
> room that only they use? Or should I stay out of those spaces that
> are theirs and let them deal with them?
deteriorate to the point of being overwhelming.
Offer as a gift to clean up. Let it be their space but do them the
favor of giving them order occasionally. They'll see your techniques
for tackling a big problem. They may not right now appreciate it as
much as the effort it takes, but that's because
1) it's not near the top of their priority list so while they will
probably appreciate the end result, the amount of work needed to get
it there is more than it's worth to them right now and
2) kids assume that adults never do anything they don't want to do so
clearning will seem like the way you want to spend your time. And
since adults don't have anyone telling them and making them, why would
kids assume what we do is anything but a free choice? And, really, it
is! Everything we do is a choice. Here's a good page:
http://sandradodd.com/haveto
Dawn Adams expressed cleaning up as like giving them a fresh canvas:
http://joyfullyrejoycing.com/influencing%20kid%20behavior/chores/convincingthemtopickup.html
There are several pages about chores if you scroll down the right hand
side.
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
keetry
==But the "personal chores" ... I'm not really sure how to handle them. Should I ask the girls to come get their clothes once I've folded/hung them or should I put their clothes away? Should I clean their rooms? Should I clean the bathroom and computer room that only they use? Or should I stay out of those spaces that are theirs and let them deal with them?==
There's no harm in asking for help as long as you are willing to accept, "No," for an answer. My 2 younger children are almost 3 and 6.5 years old so I wash, fold and put their clothes away for them most of the time. There are times when they join me and help or my 6 year old will do some on his own. I clean their room most of the time. Sometimes I ask for help. Sometimes they will help. Sometimes not. Sometimes they see me cleaning and decide to help without being asked.
With my oldest son, who is 19 now, I pretty much leave his room to him. If I notice we are running low on glasses, I'll ask him if he'll bring the dirty dishes from his room to the kitchen. If I see dishes in his room, I'll grab them if I can. When doing laundry I'll tell him so he can throw stuff in if he wants. I usually can't get his dirty clothes out of his room because most of the time they are mixed up with the clean ones and I can't tell which is which. If he has dirty clothes in his basket, I'll grab those. If I wash them I also fold them and put them away. Sometimes I've just left his clothes on his bed. I've had people ask me why I do his laundry since he's capable of doing it himself. I respond that I do my husband's laundry (most of the time) as part of doing the family laundry so why wouldn't I do my child's? He can and does do his own laundry, too, when he feels the need.
If I begin to feel the need to clean his room, I'll tell him. "Hey. If I can get to it, I'd like to clean your room sometime soon." If he really doesn't want me to, he'll say so. Most of the time, though, he doesn't mind. Although, he does say he doesn't like it that he can't find things after I've cleaned in there. I don't take things or rearrange things. Mostly, it's just cleaning up trash, dirty dishes and getting clothes off the floor so I can vacuum. The other night I was lying in bed and I saw his bedroom door open and a small bag of trash being tossed out. He was cleaning his room for his own reasons and to his own satisfaction.
My 19 year old also has a bathroom that is pretty much exclusively his. I approach that the same way as the other stuff. Sometimes I clean it. Sometimes I ask him to clean it but I don't get angry or upset if he says, "Not now." A lot of times I can't get to his bathroom because I am more focused on keeping the common areas of the house clean. Yesterday I noticed that his bathroom was particularly dirty. He was heading out the door so I knew he didn't have time to really clean it. I asked if he'd just throw away the trash that was in there. He said, "Before I leave?" I said that would be appreciated. He did it, quick and easy.
I think this has been mentioned on this list before (sometimes I get the places where I read things mixed up) but I'll say it again. Just a couple of years ago I had an epiphany from something I read on one of these unschooling discussion groups or an offshoot of one of them. I think it was the Peaceful Partners (or is it Partnership?) yahoo group but I can't remember for sure now. Anyway, it was the realization that if something bothered me, it was my issue, my problem. Since it was mine and I could be responsible for it, I could enjoy dealing with it however I chose. All of a sudden I looked at the messy bathroom and thought, "I want to clean it," rather than, "Ugh. Why do I have to clean this filthy room?" Cleaning the bathroom became enjoyable.
I choose home much or how little effort to put into anything. I don't have to fold the laundry and/or put it away. I could leave it in the dryer. I could leave it in the basket. I could toss into drawers without folding it. I don't have to do it according to anyone else's schedule or standards and neither should my children.
Alysia
There's no harm in asking for help as long as you are willing to accept, "No," for an answer. My 2 younger children are almost 3 and 6.5 years old so I wash, fold and put their clothes away for them most of the time. There are times when they join me and help or my 6 year old will do some on his own. I clean their room most of the time. Sometimes I ask for help. Sometimes they will help. Sometimes not. Sometimes they see me cleaning and decide to help without being asked.
With my oldest son, who is 19 now, I pretty much leave his room to him. If I notice we are running low on glasses, I'll ask him if he'll bring the dirty dishes from his room to the kitchen. If I see dishes in his room, I'll grab them if I can. When doing laundry I'll tell him so he can throw stuff in if he wants. I usually can't get his dirty clothes out of his room because most of the time they are mixed up with the clean ones and I can't tell which is which. If he has dirty clothes in his basket, I'll grab those. If I wash them I also fold them and put them away. Sometimes I've just left his clothes on his bed. I've had people ask me why I do his laundry since he's capable of doing it himself. I respond that I do my husband's laundry (most of the time) as part of doing the family laundry so why wouldn't I do my child's? He can and does do his own laundry, too, when he feels the need.
If I begin to feel the need to clean his room, I'll tell him. "Hey. If I can get to it, I'd like to clean your room sometime soon." If he really doesn't want me to, he'll say so. Most of the time, though, he doesn't mind. Although, he does say he doesn't like it that he can't find things after I've cleaned in there. I don't take things or rearrange things. Mostly, it's just cleaning up trash, dirty dishes and getting clothes off the floor so I can vacuum. The other night I was lying in bed and I saw his bedroom door open and a small bag of trash being tossed out. He was cleaning his room for his own reasons and to his own satisfaction.
My 19 year old also has a bathroom that is pretty much exclusively his. I approach that the same way as the other stuff. Sometimes I clean it. Sometimes I ask him to clean it but I don't get angry or upset if he says, "Not now." A lot of times I can't get to his bathroom because I am more focused on keeping the common areas of the house clean. Yesterday I noticed that his bathroom was particularly dirty. He was heading out the door so I knew he didn't have time to really clean it. I asked if he'd just throw away the trash that was in there. He said, "Before I leave?" I said that would be appreciated. He did it, quick and easy.
I think this has been mentioned on this list before (sometimes I get the places where I read things mixed up) but I'll say it again. Just a couple of years ago I had an epiphany from something I read on one of these unschooling discussion groups or an offshoot of one of them. I think it was the Peaceful Partners (or is it Partnership?) yahoo group but I can't remember for sure now. Anyway, it was the realization that if something bothered me, it was my issue, my problem. Since it was mine and I could be responsible for it, I could enjoy dealing with it however I chose. All of a sudden I looked at the messy bathroom and thought, "I want to clean it," rather than, "Ugh. Why do I have to clean this filthy room?" Cleaning the bathroom became enjoyable.
I choose home much or how little effort to put into anything. I don't have to fold the laundry and/or put it away. I could leave it in the dryer. I could leave it in the basket. I could toss into drawers without folding it. I don't have to do it according to anyone else's schedule or standards and neither should my children.
Alysia
Sandra Dodd
-=-All of a sudden I looked at the messy bathroom and thought, "I want
to clean it," rather than, "Ugh. Why do I have to clean this filthy
room?" Cleaning the bathroom became enjoyable. -=-
My dishwasher is broken and my repair appointment isn't until
Wednesday. So I got some of the leftover paper bowls and plates and
cups from the January symposium (they're taking space in the garage)
and some plastic cutlery, and put it in a box on the counter under a
sign on the cabinet that says "Use disposable if you can."
Big sin?
Not in New Mexico, where water is more valuable than paper. And we
burn used paper plates and cups to start the hot tub anyway.
It's not that I don't know how to wash dishes by hand, it's that one
one side of the sink is the microwave and on the other is a breadmaker
and toaster. I'm not set up to wash dishes. And when I was a kid
that's one of the things I was made to do, so it's easy to feel
martyrly about it. I never even had a dishwasher in my life until
after Marty was born.
I've washed dishes twice since it broke last week, and both times I
psyched myself up for it and was grateful for the small amount of
dirty dishes, because Keith and Marty and Ashlee his girlfriend were
actually using paper, and eating things that didn't need dishes. I
made egg salad and tuna salad and made sure there was bread.
Sandwiches have been common, and leftovers that can be heated in a
paper bowl.
If we couldn't get the dishwasher fixed, I would rearrange the
counters and get a draintray and dishrack and all that good stuff.
It's doable, but not worth doing for one week. (My dishrack is wired
into a tree off the deck, holding a tray of birdfood.)
Unschooling helped me with all of this decision making. It doesn't
make me a bad mom or crummy wife to say "use paper plates if it's all
the same to you."
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
to clean it," rather than, "Ugh. Why do I have to clean this filthy
room?" Cleaning the bathroom became enjoyable. -=-
My dishwasher is broken and my repair appointment isn't until
Wednesday. So I got some of the leftover paper bowls and plates and
cups from the January symposium (they're taking space in the garage)
and some plastic cutlery, and put it in a box on the counter under a
sign on the cabinet that says "Use disposable if you can."
Big sin?
Not in New Mexico, where water is more valuable than paper. And we
burn used paper plates and cups to start the hot tub anyway.
It's not that I don't know how to wash dishes by hand, it's that one
one side of the sink is the microwave and on the other is a breadmaker
and toaster. I'm not set up to wash dishes. And when I was a kid
that's one of the things I was made to do, so it's easy to feel
martyrly about it. I never even had a dishwasher in my life until
after Marty was born.
I've washed dishes twice since it broke last week, and both times I
psyched myself up for it and was grateful for the small amount of
dirty dishes, because Keith and Marty and Ashlee his girlfriend were
actually using paper, and eating things that didn't need dishes. I
made egg salad and tuna salad and made sure there was bread.
Sandwiches have been common, and leftovers that can be heated in a
paper bowl.
If we couldn't get the dishwasher fixed, I would rearrange the
counters and get a draintray and dishrack and all that good stuff.
It's doable, but not worth doing for one week. (My dishrack is wired
into a tree off the deck, holding a tray of birdfood.)
Unschooling helped me with all of this decision making. It doesn't
make me a bad mom or crummy wife to say "use paper plates if it's all
the same to you."
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
keetry
> Unschooling helped me with all of this decision making. It doesn'tOnce something becomes a choice with several options it's not so much of a chore.
> make me a bad mom or crummy wife to say "use paper plates if it's all
> the same to you."
When my husband was deployed last time I hired a mother's helper over the summer. She came 3-4 times a week for an hour or two to play with my kids and/or do some light housework and/or babysit while I ran an errand or two. When school started she got busy and couldn't come much anymore. I hired a cleaning service. I could only afford to have them come once a month but it was a huge help. I also hired a lawn service.
Alysia
Mirjam Koopmans
I was talking with my friend about Sandra's book and we both have husbands
(like Amanda's) that won't easily read a book about parenting/homeschooling
etc. We were wondering if there's a 'Big book of unschooling' audiobook, or
maybe it would be an idea for husbands who travel a lot and could maybe
listen it in the car?
Groetjes, Mirjam :o), met Adam (8), Boaz (5) en Levi (2).
http://www.leermeer.blogspot.com <http://www.leermeer.blogspot.com/>
_____
From: [email protected] [mailto:[email protected]]
On Behalf Of Amanda's Shoebox
Sent: zaterdag 1 mei 2010 18:30
To: [email protected]
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Laundry and Cleaning Rooms
We've been unschooling for a few months now. I'd like for our family to move
to a more radical unschooling type of lifestyle. I've been practicing
radical unschooling principles with my husband, although not as perfectly as
I would like to, lol.
I've been racking my brain trying to figure out how to introduce the
concepts to my husband in a practical way (he doesn't like to read, so I
can't hand him a book or anything). After a situation where the girls forgot
to give the dogs water and then hearing the girls argue about whose job it
was to take out the trash, it hit me... chores! Get rid of the chores!
So, I talked with my husband, he said it was fine to give it a try and
starting yesterday I took over their chores. Taking over feeding the dogs,
dishes, taking out trash etc. is no problem. But the "personal chores" ...
I'm not really sure how to handle them. Should I ask the girls to come get
their clothes once I've folded/hung them or should I put their clothes away?
Should I clean their rooms? Should I clean the bathroom and computer room
that only they use? Or should I stay out of those spaces that are theirs and
let them deal with them?
How do you all handle things like that? Oh, and our girls are 14, 13, and
10... the 10 and 13 year old share a room.
~ Amanda
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
(like Amanda's) that won't easily read a book about parenting/homeschooling
etc. We were wondering if there's a 'Big book of unschooling' audiobook, or
maybe it would be an idea for husbands who travel a lot and could maybe
listen it in the car?
Groetjes, Mirjam :o), met Adam (8), Boaz (5) en Levi (2).
http://www.leermeer.blogspot.com <http://www.leermeer.blogspot.com/>
_____
From: [email protected] [mailto:[email protected]]
On Behalf Of Amanda's Shoebox
Sent: zaterdag 1 mei 2010 18:30
To: [email protected]
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Laundry and Cleaning Rooms
We've been unschooling for a few months now. I'd like for our family to move
to a more radical unschooling type of lifestyle. I've been practicing
radical unschooling principles with my husband, although not as perfectly as
I would like to, lol.
I've been racking my brain trying to figure out how to introduce the
concepts to my husband in a practical way (he doesn't like to read, so I
can't hand him a book or anything). After a situation where the girls forgot
to give the dogs water and then hearing the girls argue about whose job it
was to take out the trash, it hit me... chores! Get rid of the chores!
So, I talked with my husband, he said it was fine to give it a try and
starting yesterday I took over their chores. Taking over feeding the dogs,
dishes, taking out trash etc. is no problem. But the "personal chores" ...
I'm not really sure how to handle them. Should I ask the girls to come get
their clothes once I've folded/hung them or should I put their clothes away?
Should I clean their rooms? Should I clean the bathroom and computer room
that only they use? Or should I stay out of those spaces that are theirs and
let them deal with them?
How do you all handle things like that? Oh, and our girls are 14, 13, and
10... the 10 and 13 year old share a room.
~ Amanda
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-I was talking with my friend about Sandra's book and we both have
husbands
(like Amanda's) that won't easily read a book about parenting/
homeschooling
etc. We were wondering if there's a 'Big book of unschooling'
audiobook, or
maybe it would be an idea for husbands who travel a lot and could maybe
listen it in the car?-=-
There isn't, but there are many things that could be listened to in
the car linked here:
http://sandradodd.com/listen
Those that are on the internet archive can be downloaded directly from
there, free.
http://www.archive.org/search.php?query=unschooling%20AND%20mediatype%3Aaudio
Wow. The Peaceful Parenting talk I did with Richard Prystowsky has
been downloaded over 11,000 times. Cool!
Several of those are marked as having been part of a conference I
hadn't heard of: unSchooling Oppression. It's something by University
folk from Ottawa, and you can read more about it here:
http://unschoolingoppression.wordpress.com/
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
husbands
(like Amanda's) that won't easily read a book about parenting/
homeschooling
etc. We were wondering if there's a 'Big book of unschooling'
audiobook, or
maybe it would be an idea for husbands who travel a lot and could maybe
listen it in the car?-=-
There isn't, but there are many things that could be listened to in
the car linked here:
http://sandradodd.com/listen
Those that are on the internet archive can be downloaded directly from
there, free.
http://www.archive.org/search.php?query=unschooling%20AND%20mediatype%3Aaudio
Wow. The Peaceful Parenting talk I did with Richard Prystowsky has
been downloaded over 11,000 times. Cool!
Several of those are marked as having been part of a conference I
hadn't heard of: unSchooling Oppression. It's something by University
folk from Ottawa, and you can read more about it here:
http://unschoolingoppression.wordpress.com/
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
keetry
I had a wonderful experience of how this works this morning. When I woke up and came downstairs my house was clean as if the cleaning fairies had come last night to rescue me. My 19 year old son was bored last night and decided to clean several rooms in the house. He cleaned the kitchen, living room and upstairs playroom. He even put the furniture back where I like it. (Furniture gets moved around a lot to make forts and special rides, as my 6 year old calls them.) He did it because he wanted to, not for me or to get paid or so he could use the car. It was still a nice gift.
Alysia
Alysia
Thea
"Chores" just sounds so...boring and awful. We handle the things that need to get done around the house like most of the others here, but at some point being the one who cared what things looked more than my DH and DS was making my to-do list pretty long. Then a friend introduced us to the concept of "broom dancing"...which is just putting on your favorite move-to-it music, cranking it up as high as you need it, and blasting around together (those who want to) getting things picked up and cleaned up for 15 or 20 minutes. That turned housework into something my then-11 y.o ASKED us to do ("can we do some broom dancing today, Mom?") and, now 16 with his own music collection, he makes new playlists with broom dancing in mind. And he's by far the best vacuum-er (vacuumist?)in the house.
It's so easy to have fun in this world...!
Thea
It's so easy to have fun in this world...!
Thea
Bernadette Lynn
On 1 May 2010 18:29, Amanda's Shoebox <amandasshoebox@...> wrote:
it clean and tidy - even when as a student I lived in their house in England
while they lived in Saudi Arabia - but since I got married it's been a
gradual slide downhill getting worse with each baby.
Today I tidied my 10-yeaar-old's room; she's in France with my parents and
is coming back tomorrow, so I thought a clean room to come back to would be
nice but I've been putting it off for three weeks. I found it unexpectedly
wonderful, though. Almost every time I picked something up it turned out to
be something she'd made; I picked up a cardboard box and found a beautifully
intricate pattern of beads glued inside it, some tiny scraps of paper on
closer inspection were tiny Polly Pocket sized ice-skates, a scrap of paper
and sellotape straightened out turned out to be a tiny night-time scene with
a minute fairy suspended on a thread over the top. I found such a wealth of
creativity, pictures, models, jewellery - I had no idea she'd done so much
and was blown away by the imagination and skill. She shows me things
sometimes, but usually when we're doing things as a family when she's rather
more slapdash. She's amazing.
Bernadette.
--
http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/U15459
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> Should I clean their rooms? Should I clean the bathroom and computer roomI hate cleaning and tidying. As long as I lived in my parents' house I kept
> that only they use? Or should I stay out of those spaces that are theirs and
> let them deal with them?
>
> How do you all handle things like that? Oh, and our girls are 14, 13, and
> 10... the 10 and 13 year old share a room.
>
> ~ Amanda
>
>
>
it clean and tidy - even when as a student I lived in their house in England
while they lived in Saudi Arabia - but since I got married it's been a
gradual slide downhill getting worse with each baby.
Today I tidied my 10-yeaar-old's room; she's in France with my parents and
is coming back tomorrow, so I thought a clean room to come back to would be
nice but I've been putting it off for three weeks. I found it unexpectedly
wonderful, though. Almost every time I picked something up it turned out to
be something she'd made; I picked up a cardboard box and found a beautifully
intricate pattern of beads glued inside it, some tiny scraps of paper on
closer inspection were tiny Polly Pocket sized ice-skates, a scrap of paper
and sellotape straightened out turned out to be a tiny night-time scene with
a minute fairy suspended on a thread over the top. I found such a wealth of
creativity, pictures, models, jewellery - I had no idea she'd done so much
and was blown away by the imagination and skill. She shows me things
sometimes, but usually when we're doing things as a family when she's rather
more slapdash. She's amazing.
Bernadette.
--
http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/U15459
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]