DaBreeze21

That was amazing. I'm sitting here crying. Thank you so much for
sharing it! If only more people lived life this way.

One quote from the his lecture about having fun that really hit home,
he said, "I'm dying and I'm having fun". wow.

Susan

Jenny C

> Randy Pausch died today of pancreatic cancer. At his home in Virginia.
>
> If you are unfamiliar with The Last Lecture, it is here:
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji5_MqicxSo
>
> It's over an hour long; but if you have the time, you will be
inspired.


I watched this a while ago. What I truly found inspiring about him, is
that he never ever claims to know it all. In fact quite the opposite.
He found clever ways to find the answers and get what he wanted.

I love how he talks about his parents. How they supported his dreams
and ambitions. This is my favorite part of unschooling. Saying "yes"
and finding ways to make it happen, helping my kids get what they want
in life.

We know a lot of parents that say "no" a lot and belittle their
children's dreams and ambitions and force their kids to focus on the
parent's narrow view of success and what is "right".

I want my kids to feel empowered, so I empower them. I don't want their
view of the world to be tainted by "can't", "shouldn't", "wouldn't", and
the like. I want their world to be full of "yes I can", I shall find a
way to do what I want to do with my parent's blessing and help.

So many parents set their kids up where the kids have to defy their
parents to get what they want in life. That is such a huge obstacle and
burden for a young person, almost to the point of self defeating. Some
young people don't have that strength of character or drive to jump that
hurdle and so, stay stuck in that world.

Sandra Dodd

Jenny, what you wrote is beautiful. I added all of the end of it to
the page on "yes":
http://sandradodd.com/yes


Over the past few week or so I've heard several direct examples and
some stories of the kneejerk "no" so common to parents. Maybe the
balance will tip. My nephew broke up with a girlfriend because she
had a young son she was lying to, and as he said "She would be
telling me a story she had already told me three or four times, and
tell him to stop interrupting." He wants to be with someone who is
kind and honest. Good for him.

It's hard for my kids, too, to be around people saying "No" for no
good reason. I'm not glad they'll have that tension, but I'm glad
for what it means about their lives, and how it will improve their
children's lives.

Sandra

Jenny C

> Over the past few week or so I've heard several direct examples and
> some stories of the kneejerk "no" so common to parents. Maybe the
> balance will tip. My nephew broke up with a girlfriend because she
> had a young son she was lying to, and as he said "She would be
> telling me a story she had already told me three or four times, and
> tell him to stop interrupting." He wants to be with someone who is
> kind and honest. Good for him.


I have a really hard time being around people that don't let kids
interrupt a conversation because the "adult" is talking. I've been
known to let the adult continue with what they are saying, respond with
a pat reply and then give my complete full direct attention to the child
that had interrupted. I've been hugely surprised at the content which
the child had to put out there with thoughts and words, and it is very
very often part of the adult conversation that they'd been listening to
and "interrupting". I've been glad, every time that I've done this.
Partly because I get to hear more and indepth aspects to conversations,
but also, generally the parent that did the shushing will not do it
again and will actually acknowledge the child as part of the
conversation from that point onward.

>
> It's hard for my kids, too, to be around people saying "No" for no
> good reason. I'm not glad they'll have that tension, but I'm glad
> for what it means about their lives, and how it will improve their
> children's lives.


We get the extreme examples of parents saying "no" because of Chamille's
friend, which I've written about a few times. We have a family joke
now, when someone is being extreme and unreasonable/illogical,
hypocritical, we call them "george" Or "pulling a george". Sorry for
anyone who is named George, who is nice and not all those horrid things
mentioned.... but still that is our big joking insult here.