Re: Growing with Unschooling
[email protected]
Hello,
I've been lurking for a while. I joined the group because we are an unschooling family and I needed to hear what other families were experiencing. My background is in teaching. I originally started homeschooling my ten year old daughter because she taught herself to read at four and was very active. I decided Kindergarten would be a boring frustration for her. I did not want to break her love of learning spirit. She never went to preschool but every year I started the year out with organized type learning activities for her to suit my teaching needs. This was before I really knew about unschooling. But, every year we quickly learned that she was much better off exploring her world and learning naturally without the typical "school" type activities so this only lasted for a while. I guess you should say my daughter taught me to be an unschooler. I also have a seven year old daughter.
This year my daughter asked me to give her assingments. We ordered some materials she was interested in and made ourselves a schedule. Of course, after six weeks this no longer worked. We dropped everything because I no longer saw her spark for learning and she seemed needlessly bored. So, now we are back to strict unschooling days which we love. But, somehow I feel it is harder to determine what my oldest (10 year old) is actually doing with her days. I can see what it is that the kids are doing when they are unschooling and younger. I can always feel safe because I "see" the learner taking place. They are learning to write, read and do math based on their every day needs and it comes naturally. Now as my older daughter ages I find it more difficult to document what she is actually doing. She writes easily and computates math easily when she needs to. However, she is not interested in pursuing mathematical or writing just for the fun of it likes she does with reading. She reads far beyond her age and a variety of fiction and nonfiction. She loves to read and she spends many hours reading. But, it's not like we discuss these books. She takes it all in her brain and usually I never even hear about what she is reading anymore. She still spends time each day telling stories and playing with her horses and little people. I love that she has not outgrown these and she can still enjoy playing with them. She enjoys playing with her younger sister, too. They are very good friends. We have a horse and we spend hours out at the barn. Both girls are involved in piano and theater. We explore, travel and spend times with friends.
I think I read somewhere at one time that unschooled kids hit a spot in their development where they may not look like they are doing anything important even though they really are growing in leaps and bounds. My question is could this be where my daughter is at the moment. I'm interested in hearing if other unschooling families have experienced this same sort of thing as there children pass into those tween years. And, how they came out on the other side. I know unschooling has worked up to this age and I would like for it to continue to work.
Thanks for you help,
Shannon M. Reichard
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
I've been lurking for a while. I joined the group because we are an unschooling family and I needed to hear what other families were experiencing. My background is in teaching. I originally started homeschooling my ten year old daughter because she taught herself to read at four and was very active. I decided Kindergarten would be a boring frustration for her. I did not want to break her love of learning spirit. She never went to preschool but every year I started the year out with organized type learning activities for her to suit my teaching needs. This was before I really knew about unschooling. But, every year we quickly learned that she was much better off exploring her world and learning naturally without the typical "school" type activities so this only lasted for a while. I guess you should say my daughter taught me to be an unschooler. I also have a seven year old daughter.
This year my daughter asked me to give her assingments. We ordered some materials she was interested in and made ourselves a schedule. Of course, after six weeks this no longer worked. We dropped everything because I no longer saw her spark for learning and she seemed needlessly bored. So, now we are back to strict unschooling days which we love. But, somehow I feel it is harder to determine what my oldest (10 year old) is actually doing with her days. I can see what it is that the kids are doing when they are unschooling and younger. I can always feel safe because I "see" the learner taking place. They are learning to write, read and do math based on their every day needs and it comes naturally. Now as my older daughter ages I find it more difficult to document what she is actually doing. She writes easily and computates math easily when she needs to. However, she is not interested in pursuing mathematical or writing just for the fun of it likes she does with reading. She reads far beyond her age and a variety of fiction and nonfiction. She loves to read and she spends many hours reading. But, it's not like we discuss these books. She takes it all in her brain and usually I never even hear about what she is reading anymore. She still spends time each day telling stories and playing with her horses and little people. I love that she has not outgrown these and she can still enjoy playing with them. She enjoys playing with her younger sister, too. They are very good friends. We have a horse and we spend hours out at the barn. Both girls are involved in piano and theater. We explore, travel and spend times with friends.
I think I read somewhere at one time that unschooled kids hit a spot in their development where they may not look like they are doing anything important even though they really are growing in leaps and bounds. My question is could this be where my daughter is at the moment. I'm interested in hearing if other unschooling families have experienced this same sort of thing as there children pass into those tween years. And, how they came out on the other side. I know unschooling has worked up to this age and I would like for it to continue to work.
Thanks for you help,
Shannon M. Reichard
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Kim H
<<<I think I read somewhere at one time that unschooled kids hit a spot in their development where they may not look like they are doing anything important even though they really are growing in leaps and bounds. My question is could this be where my daughter is at the moment.>>.
Hi Shannon,
I guess, when we remain focussed on what learning is (and what it isn't) then we may find it hard to box in what our kids are doing, especially as they grow older. I think the danger with this way of looking at learning lies in the labelling and boxing in. True unschooling is life learning. Learning is life - like breathing, sleeping, eating, dreaming, playing, the 3 R's etc. To compartmentalise learning is very schooly and not a natural part of life.
You already listed so many things that your daughter enjoys doing in her day. All of that (and more) is learning and growing and developing her as a person. That's the learning. That's the living.
That's what's important for her.
It's so important for us with younger children, (and all ages) to get this early so we don't only notice the writing and the reading and the maths but we take joy in ALL of the things our children are doing in their life and see ALL of that as their learning journey. Unschooling has no framework of 'shoulds' and outcomes to be ticked. It is a fluid, natural journey which is unique to all who live it.
Kim
Hi Shannon,
I guess, when we remain focussed on what learning is (and what it isn't) then we may find it hard to box in what our kids are doing, especially as they grow older. I think the danger with this way of looking at learning lies in the labelling and boxing in. True unschooling is life learning. Learning is life - like breathing, sleeping, eating, dreaming, playing, the 3 R's etc. To compartmentalise learning is very schooly and not a natural part of life.
You already listed so many things that your daughter enjoys doing in her day. All of that (and more) is learning and growing and developing her as a person. That's the learning. That's the living.
That's what's important for her.
It's so important for us with younger children, (and all ages) to get this early so we don't only notice the writing and the reading and the maths but we take joy in ALL of the things our children are doing in their life and see ALL of that as their learning journey. Unschooling has no framework of 'shoulds' and outcomes to be ticked. It is a fluid, natural journey which is unique to all who live it.
Kim
----- Original Message -----
From: EREICHARD@...
To: [email protected]
Sent: Thursday, November 02, 2006 4:29 AM
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Re: Growing with Unschooling
Hello,
I've been lurking for a while. I joined the group because we are an unschooling family and I needed to hear what other families were experiencing. My background is in teaching. I originally started homeschooling my ten year old daughter because she taught herself to read at four and was very active. I decided Kindergarten would be a boring frustration for her. I did not want to break her love of learning spirit. She never went to preschool but every year I started the year out with organized type learning activities for her to suit my teaching needs. This was before I really knew about unschooling. But, every year we quickly learned that she was much better off exploring her world and learning naturally without the typical "school" type activities so this only lasted for a while. I guess you should say my daughter taught me to be an unschooler. I also have a seven year old daughter.
This year my daughter asked me to give her assingments. We ordered some materials she was interested in and made ourselves a schedule. Of course, after six weeks this no longer worked. We dropped everything because I no longer saw her spark for learning and she seemed needlessly bored. So, now we are back to strict unschooling days which we love. But, somehow I feel it is harder to determine what my oldest (10 year old) is actually doing with her days. I can see what it is that the kids are doing when they are unschooling and younger. I can always feel safe because I "see" the learner taking place. They are learning to write, read and do math based on their every day needs and it comes naturally. Now as my older daughter ages I find it more difficult to document what she is actually doing. She writes easily and computates math easily when she needs to. However, she is not interested in pursuing mathematical or writing just for the fun of it likes she does with reading. She reads far eyond her age and a variety of fiction and nonfiction. She loves to read and she spends many hours reading. But, it's not like we discuss these books. She takes it all in her brain and usually I never even hear about what she is reading anymore. She still spends time each day telling stories and playing with her horses and little people. I love that she has not outgrown these and she can still enjoy playing with them. She enjoys playing with her younger sister, too. They are very good friends. We have a horse and we spend hours out at the barn. Both girls are involved in piano and theater. We explore, travel and spend times with friends.
I think I read somewhere at one time that unschooled kids hit a spot in their development where they may not look like they are doing anything important even though they really are growing in leaps and bounds. My question is could this be where my daughter is at the moment. I'm interested in hearing if other unschooling families have experienced this same sort of thing as there children pass into those tween years. And, how they came out on the other side. I know unschooling has worked up to this age and I would like for it to continue to work.
Thanks for you help,
Shannon M. Reichard
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-I think I read somewhere at one time that unschooled kids hit a
spot in their development where they may not look like they are doing
anything important even though they really are growing in leaps and
bounds-=-
It seemed to me that there was a time when my kids were "ahead," when
they were little, and then seemed "behind" (mid-school/Jr.-Highesh
ages) and then about the time the high school kids started rebelling
and realizing how disgusted they were with school, and they had the
skills (learned in school, though not on the curriculum) to really
NOT learn, to avoid learning, my kids were zooming along.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
spot in their development where they may not look like they are doing
anything important even though they really are growing in leaps and
bounds-=-
It seemed to me that there was a time when my kids were "ahead," when
they were little, and then seemed "behind" (mid-school/Jr.-Highesh
ages) and then about the time the high school kids started rebelling
and realizing how disgusted they were with school, and they had the
skills (learned in school, though not on the curriculum) to really
NOT learn, to avoid learning, my kids were zooming along.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
Late, again. Too many irons in teh fire, but these posts sit until I
can get to them.
-----Original Message-----
From: EREICHARD@...
But, somehow I feel it is harder to
determine what my oldest (10 year old) is actually doing with her days.
I can
see what it is that the kids are doing when they are unschooling and
younger. I
can always feel safe because I "see" the learner taking place.
-=-=-=-=-
I think that's the hardest age to see the learning. Toddlers and teens
seem to *actively* pursue learning. I think from eight to twelve is
kind of a "passive" learning stage. More absorbing and digesting and
"storing up" for the next phase.
-==-=-=-=-=-=-=-
They are
learning to write, read and do math based on their every day needs and
it comes
naturally. Now as my older daughter ages I find it more difficult to
document
what she is actually doing. She writes easily and computates math
easily when
she needs to. However, she is not interested in pursuing mathematical
or
writing just for the fun of it likes she does with reading. She reads
far
beyond her age and a variety of fiction and nonfiction. She loves to
read and
she spends many hours reading. But, it's not like we discuss these
books.
-=-=-=-
Do you read them too? Or are you just asking her to regurgitate to you
what she read?
-=-=-=-=-=-
I think I read somewhere at one time that unschooled kids hit a spot in
their
development where they may not look like they are doing anything
important even
though they really are growing in leaps and bounds. My question is
could this
be where my daughter is at the moment. I'm interested in hearing if
other
unschooling families have experienced this same sort of thing as there
children
pass into those tween years. And, how they came out on the other side.
I know
unschooling has worked up to this age and I would like for it to
continue to
work.
-=-=-=-=-
When Cameron came out of it, he suddenly couldn't get enough stuff in
his head at once. And it's not as if he's slowed down one bit. He's
snowballing now at 18. I suggested yesterday that he write it all down
so that we could break things down into workable pieces instead of his
massive lump of things he wants to pursue with nowhere to start.
The schooled kids seem to do the opposite: they don't have a chance to
sit back and digest what they're learning from 8-12---they're pushed
harder and harder and harder until they just don't *want* to learn
anymore. Until you "can't make them." Then they shut down just when
they would naturally be gearing up.
I've watched both my boys slow way down and seem unimpressive in
comparison to friends and cousins who were doing science fairs and
learning languages and creating imaginary countries. But then (Cameron
did, and I expect Duncan to) they SHOOOOT out of the other side eager
to keep learning and learn *everything* now!
I *know* Duncan is still learning every day at ten now. He comes up
with words and phrases that assure me of this. He changes almost
overnight (although I know it's been percolating there for
days/weeks/months). No, he's not doing long-division or conjugating
verbs or diagramng sentences or blowing up the science lab. But he
travels a lot and thinks deeply and questions *everything*. He just
lost another tooth yesterday, so I know his body's working hard to
change too! There'a a lot going on in there.
I wouldn't worry about this apparent "lull"---there's a LOT going on
under the surface that'll erupt when she's ready!
~Kelly
________________________________________________________________________
Check out the new AOL. Most comprehensive set of free safety and
security tools, free access to millions of high-quality videos from
across the web, free AOL Mail and more.
can get to them.
-----Original Message-----
From: EREICHARD@...
But, somehow I feel it is harder to
determine what my oldest (10 year old) is actually doing with her days.
I can
see what it is that the kids are doing when they are unschooling and
younger. I
can always feel safe because I "see" the learner taking place.
-=-=-=-=-
I think that's the hardest age to see the learning. Toddlers and teens
seem to *actively* pursue learning. I think from eight to twelve is
kind of a "passive" learning stage. More absorbing and digesting and
"storing up" for the next phase.
-==-=-=-=-=-=-=-
They are
learning to write, read and do math based on their every day needs and
it comes
naturally. Now as my older daughter ages I find it more difficult to
document
what she is actually doing. She writes easily and computates math
easily when
she needs to. However, she is not interested in pursuing mathematical
or
writing just for the fun of it likes she does with reading. She reads
far
beyond her age and a variety of fiction and nonfiction. She loves to
read and
she spends many hours reading. But, it's not like we discuss these
books.
-=-=-=-
Do you read them too? Or are you just asking her to regurgitate to you
what she read?
-=-=-=-=-=-
I think I read somewhere at one time that unschooled kids hit a spot in
their
development where they may not look like they are doing anything
important even
though they really are growing in leaps and bounds. My question is
could this
be where my daughter is at the moment. I'm interested in hearing if
other
unschooling families have experienced this same sort of thing as there
children
pass into those tween years. And, how they came out on the other side.
I know
unschooling has worked up to this age and I would like for it to
continue to
work.
-=-=-=-=-
When Cameron came out of it, he suddenly couldn't get enough stuff in
his head at once. And it's not as if he's slowed down one bit. He's
snowballing now at 18. I suggested yesterday that he write it all down
so that we could break things down into workable pieces instead of his
massive lump of things he wants to pursue with nowhere to start.
The schooled kids seem to do the opposite: they don't have a chance to
sit back and digest what they're learning from 8-12---they're pushed
harder and harder and harder until they just don't *want* to learn
anymore. Until you "can't make them." Then they shut down just when
they would naturally be gearing up.
I've watched both my boys slow way down and seem unimpressive in
comparison to friends and cousins who were doing science fairs and
learning languages and creating imaginary countries. But then (Cameron
did, and I expect Duncan to) they SHOOOOT out of the other side eager
to keep learning and learn *everything* now!
I *know* Duncan is still learning every day at ten now. He comes up
with words and phrases that assure me of this. He changes almost
overnight (although I know it's been percolating there for
days/weeks/months). No, he's not doing long-division or conjugating
verbs or diagramng sentences or blowing up the science lab. But he
travels a lot and thinks deeply and questions *everything*. He just
lost another tooth yesterday, so I know his body's working hard to
change too! There'a a lot going on in there.
I wouldn't worry about this apparent "lull"---there's a LOT going on
under the surface that'll erupt when she's ready!
~Kelly
________________________________________________________________________
Check out the new AOL. Most comprehensive set of free safety and
security tools, free access to millions of high-quality videos from
across the web, free AOL Mail and more.
Sandra Dodd
-=-I think that's the hardest age to see the learning. Toddlers and
teens
seem to *actively* pursue learning. I think from eight to twelve is
kind of a "passive" learning stage. More absorbing and digesting and
"storing up" for the next phase-=-
I've definitely seen that here, in the 10, 12, 13 range.
Teachers are supposed to document learning so they can get a
paycheck. Too many unschoolers want to play teacher. It's a good
urge to get over. <g>
-=-. He comes up
with words and phrases that assure me of this. He changes almost
overnight (although I know it's been percolating there for
days/weeks/months).-=-
Seeming-sudden changes have fascinated me, with my kids. One
morning, one would just *look* different, a new facial expression, or
a new gaze, it seemed. Or in just a few days' time one would seem so
much taller, or stand differently, or laugh differently. With babies
learning language, I remember there would be sudden differences in
intonation, like they had reached a new plateau of language use.
A couple of weeks ago I was hearing Marty (who's 17) in the next room
singing along with hip-hop stuff I don't know. He knew all the
words, his intonation was great, but his voice was new. It was
stronger and deeper. He wasn't just singing out of his throat or the
top of his chest. It was all supported (even though he was singing
to himself in his room), and it was a beautiful, new deeper tone.
I told Keith (who sings) and Holly, but didn't mention it to Marty.
Last week Marty was gone to visit some other families who were
meeting at Zenmomma's house. He left Tuesday and returned Saturday.
I was gone for the weekend, so when I got back Sunday night, I hadn't
seen him for nearly six days. He looked different. He stood
differently. I liked it. He seemed serene. His hair was
noticeably longer (probably because it got to the starting-to-curl
stage). He had a new tan corduroy Levi jacket he had bought with his
own money, and a new visor.
Being accepting and welcoming of changes and stages is better than
fear and resentment and suspicion. Wanting their lives to be
homogenous and measurable can keep us from loving the quiet and
excitement and fits and starts of how natural life goes.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
teens
seem to *actively* pursue learning. I think from eight to twelve is
kind of a "passive" learning stage. More absorbing and digesting and
"storing up" for the next phase-=-
I've definitely seen that here, in the 10, 12, 13 range.
Teachers are supposed to document learning so they can get a
paycheck. Too many unschoolers want to play teacher. It's a good
urge to get over. <g>
-=-. He comes up
with words and phrases that assure me of this. He changes almost
overnight (although I know it's been percolating there for
days/weeks/months).-=-
Seeming-sudden changes have fascinated me, with my kids. One
morning, one would just *look* different, a new facial expression, or
a new gaze, it seemed. Or in just a few days' time one would seem so
much taller, or stand differently, or laugh differently. With babies
learning language, I remember there would be sudden differences in
intonation, like they had reached a new plateau of language use.
A couple of weeks ago I was hearing Marty (who's 17) in the next room
singing along with hip-hop stuff I don't know. He knew all the
words, his intonation was great, but his voice was new. It was
stronger and deeper. He wasn't just singing out of his throat or the
top of his chest. It was all supported (even though he was singing
to himself in his room), and it was a beautiful, new deeper tone.
I told Keith (who sings) and Holly, but didn't mention it to Marty.
Last week Marty was gone to visit some other families who were
meeting at Zenmomma's house. He left Tuesday and returned Saturday.
I was gone for the weekend, so when I got back Sunday night, I hadn't
seen him for nearly six days. He looked different. He stood
differently. I liked it. He seemed serene. His hair was
noticeably longer (probably because it got to the starting-to-curl
stage). He had a new tan corduroy Levi jacket he had bought with his
own money, and a new visor.
Being accepting and welcoming of changes and stages is better than
fear and resentment and suspicion. Wanting their lives to be
homogenous and measurable can keep us from loving the quiet and
excitement and fits and starts of how natural life goes.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]