Re: [AlwaysLearning] food
Alan & Brenda Leonard
> That's an interesting idea. It makes so much sense that the junk foodI think it's also important to remember that our children do as we do, not
> would loose it's appeal if it wasn't a reward or a treat, it just simple
> was.
as we say. If you want your child to try new things, then you need to be
prepared to buy stuff at the grocery that's new to you, try different things
in restaurants, etc. If you diet, do you diet by eating less of the usual
assortment of foods and increasing your activity, or do you make certain
foods taboo and special? Is dessert a reward for good eating, or are you
and your children free to eat it or not eat it?
These are the times when I figure I'm the parent, and it's not that I need
to get on my bully pulpit and lecture because I'M THE PARENT, but that I
make decisions sometimes to do things outside my normal range of choices
because I *am* the parent and my son needs to see me try those things. I'm
as guilty of getting in a rut as any kid can be, but how could I expect my
child to do something I wouldn't do?
It took me awhile to get here, but I see where it's making a difference how
*I* live, not just to me, but also my husband and son.
brenda
Alan & Brenda Leonard
4/8/03 23:32:
liked children's menus. It's always something "and fries". Occasionally
there's a choice of fries or applesauce, but he's spoiled by our chunky
homemade kind and doesn't often want canned.
Before, his favorite "entree" was at The Olive Garden, the appetizer bowl of
fried calamari. Now, any place Italian rates high, since pasta has lots of
veggie options.
When we were in the states last week, he actually ordered something off a
children's menu. Grilled cheese, because it came with fries AND...dirt cup
dessert. He ate the sandwich and dessert. I had a salad and ate the fries.
brenda
> Last night we went to red robin and she didn't want anything off theEven before my son went vegetarian (at 6), I can't remember a time that he
> child's menu, which happens occasionally and I personally don't care
> what they eat, so that's fine.
liked children's menus. It's always something "and fries". Occasionally
there's a choice of fries or applesauce, but he's spoiled by our chunky
homemade kind and doesn't often want canned.
Before, his favorite "entree" was at The Olive Garden, the appetizer bowl of
fried calamari. Now, any place Italian rates high, since pasta has lots of
veggie options.
When we were in the states last week, he actually ordered something off a
children's menu. Grilled cheese, because it came with fries AND...dirt cup
dessert. He ate the sandwich and dessert. I had a salad and ate the fries.
brenda
Dana
One time, we had a gift certificate to a semi-fancy restaurant, and as such
money was not an issue (as it often is when we go out). My youngest dd,
then maybe 3, ordered 3 plates of calamari and cheesecake! lol! I do
remember getting funny looks that day! :)
Dana
money was not an issue (as it often is when we go out). My youngest dd,
then maybe 3, ordered 3 plates of calamari and cheesecake! lol! I do
remember getting funny looks that day! :)
Dana
----- Original Message -----
From: "Alan & Brenda Leonard" <abtleo@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Wednesday, April 09, 2003 1:54 PM
Subject: Re: [AlwaysLearning] food
> 4/8/03 23:32:
>
> > Last night we went to red robin and she didn't want anything off the
> > child's menu, which happens occasionally and I personally don't care
> > what they eat, so that's fine.
>
> Even before my son went vegetarian (at 6), I can't remember a time that he
> liked children's menus. It's always something "and fries". Occasionally
> there's a choice of fries or applesauce, but he's spoiled by our chunky
> homemade kind and doesn't often want canned.
>
> Before, his favorite "entree" was at The Olive Garden, the appetizer bowl
of
> fried calamari. Now, any place Italian rates high, since pasta has lots
of
> veggie options.
>
> When we were in the states last week, he actually ordered something off a
> children's menu. Grilled cheese, because it came with fries AND...dirt
cup
> dessert. He ate the sandwich and dessert. I had a salad and ate the
fries.
>
> brenda
>
>
>
> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
> [email protected]
>
>
>
> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
>
Lyla Wolfenstein
i wanted to share this experience yesterday, primarily for those on the list who are newer to unschooling, or struggling with truly letting go of food controls:
so, it's been a year since we embarked on this journey of "radical unschooling" - and when i look back on my blog posts from last year regarding food, i am both struck by how even when i thought i got it, i didn't, and also by how far my son has come on this journey himself. in the last month or so, i have seen a tremendous leap forward in his internal connection to his body in terms of fullness/hunger, sleep/energy, need to move, etc.
today though, was a perfect illustration of the food "issues" that have dissolved with radical unschooling - and it did take almost a year!
he has been wanting to go to the olive garden for a long time now, so today, when he asked, i said sure right away - it was a great day for it! so, he and i went, and when we got there, he noticed an amazing looking chocolate lava cake on the menu and asked if he could get it after lunch. i said sure.
he ordered pasta and an italian soda (and chicken that he didn't end up liking). he ate some breadsticks and pasta and the italian soda was *so* good, according to him - made with cream! he drank about 1/3 of it, and then said he was actually too full to finish it, and actually, too full for dessert as well.
this is the kid who previously would have insisted on TWO desserts, asked if the soda was refillable, and drank/ate it all and then gotten a stomach ache. he didn't even want to get it to go...
he has really gotten to a place, i think, where he totally trusts that he will have access to whatever he wants to eat (that is available), whenever, and so doesn't deny his own hunger, or protien cravings, or desire for fruit, vegies, whatever - nor does he binge on chips or cake - or anything, really. he eats when he's hungry or desirous, and stops when he's done. it's a *beautiful thing* and so obvious, i can't believe it took this long for us to get on board. :) but considering how long it took us (9 years), it seems pretty impressive it only took a year for him to really trust!
warmly, Lyla
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
so, it's been a year since we embarked on this journey of "radical unschooling" - and when i look back on my blog posts from last year regarding food, i am both struck by how even when i thought i got it, i didn't, and also by how far my son has come on this journey himself. in the last month or so, i have seen a tremendous leap forward in his internal connection to his body in terms of fullness/hunger, sleep/energy, need to move, etc.
today though, was a perfect illustration of the food "issues" that have dissolved with radical unschooling - and it did take almost a year!
he has been wanting to go to the olive garden for a long time now, so today, when he asked, i said sure right away - it was a great day for it! so, he and i went, and when we got there, he noticed an amazing looking chocolate lava cake on the menu and asked if he could get it after lunch. i said sure.
he ordered pasta and an italian soda (and chicken that he didn't end up liking). he ate some breadsticks and pasta and the italian soda was *so* good, according to him - made with cream! he drank about 1/3 of it, and then said he was actually too full to finish it, and actually, too full for dessert as well.
this is the kid who previously would have insisted on TWO desserts, asked if the soda was refillable, and drank/ate it all and then gotten a stomach ache. he didn't even want to get it to go...
he has really gotten to a place, i think, where he totally trusts that he will have access to whatever he wants to eat (that is available), whenever, and so doesn't deny his own hunger, or protien cravings, or desire for fruit, vegies, whatever - nor does he binge on chips or cake - or anything, really. he eats when he's hungry or desirous, and stops when he's done. it's a *beautiful thing* and so obvious, i can't believe it took this long for us to get on board. :) but considering how long it took us (9 years), it seems pretty impressive it only took a year for him to really trust!
warmly, Lyla
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
fourslaterz
I'm wondering how to introduce more variety into Samuel's (6) diet. He eats mostly things like ice cream, smarties, sprite, and cheetos. He does eat cereal, pepperoni and yogurt tubes a few times a week. He will occasionally eat chicken fingers, homemade mac and cheese, and every few months a smoothie.
We have never restricted his diet or made him eat anything. For a long time, I would let the kids pick out one or two things a week to add to what I would normally buy. When what he picked was gone, Samuel would scour the cupboards for foods he liked and might end up with a bowl of sprinkles left over from a birthday. Or he would look through the cupboards and not find anything he wanted to eat. I know I can starve him into eating more, but I do not want to do that.
About two months ago, I started buying everything that Samuel wanted at the the grocery. I was hoping that if he got excited about food, he would be more willing to eat everything he sometimes eats, and maybe try new things. He is still only eating a few things.
A few years ago used to eat tons a fruit and a few veggies and muffins and cheese. His diet is now so limited and so low in nutrition I'm not sure how he stays healthy, although he is. He sometimes has low energy, but I don't see any other physical problems. He is almost never sick.
We have repeatedly tried monkey platters, but not with much success. He sticks to the same few choices. When he does try something, watermelon a few months ago and cheese the other day, he does not like it. When he was younger he had a lot of allergies but has mostly outgrown them. His reactions are now very mild or non-existent. He was allergic to milk, soy, HFCS, and possibly nuts.
I would really like some suggestions as I have tried everything I can think of.
Amanda
Eli 8, Samuel 6
We have never restricted his diet or made him eat anything. For a long time, I would let the kids pick out one or two things a week to add to what I would normally buy. When what he picked was gone, Samuel would scour the cupboards for foods he liked and might end up with a bowl of sprinkles left over from a birthday. Or he would look through the cupboards and not find anything he wanted to eat. I know I can starve him into eating more, but I do not want to do that.
About two months ago, I started buying everything that Samuel wanted at the the grocery. I was hoping that if he got excited about food, he would be more willing to eat everything he sometimes eats, and maybe try new things. He is still only eating a few things.
A few years ago used to eat tons a fruit and a few veggies and muffins and cheese. His diet is now so limited and so low in nutrition I'm not sure how he stays healthy, although he is. He sometimes has low energy, but I don't see any other physical problems. He is almost never sick.
We have repeatedly tried monkey platters, but not with much success. He sticks to the same few choices. When he does try something, watermelon a few months ago and cheese the other day, he does not like it. When he was younger he had a lot of allergies but has mostly outgrown them. His reactions are now very mild or non-existent. He was allergic to milk, soy, HFCS, and possibly nuts.
I would really like some suggestions as I have tried everything I can think of.
Amanda
Eli 8, Samuel 6
katiescarlet02
Hi Amanda,
Here are a couple of articles which I hope help:
Getting Beyond Yuck, Part 1 Helping your picky eater.
http://www.handinhandparenting.org/csArticles/articles/000009/000900.htm
There is also a part 2 on the website.
Six Year old is a terrible eater:
http://www.awareparenting.com/answer17.htm
Hope you get something out of these articles. Would love to hear how/if this works for you.
Good luck,
Kate
Here are a couple of articles which I hope help:
Getting Beyond Yuck, Part 1 Helping your picky eater.
http://www.handinhandparenting.org/csArticles/articles/000009/000900.htm
There is also a part 2 on the website.
Six Year old is a terrible eater:
http://www.awareparenting.com/answer17.htm
Hope you get something out of these articles. Would love to hear how/if this works for you.
Good luck,
Kate
--- In [email protected], "fourslaterz" <fourslaterz@...> wrote:
>
> I'm wondering how to introduce more variety into Samuel's (6) diet. He eats mostly things like ice cream, smarties, sprite, and cheetos. He does eat cereal, pepperoni and yogurt tubes a few times a week. He will occasionally eat chicken fingers, homemade mac and cheese, and every few months a smoothie.
>
> We have never restricted his diet or made him eat anything. For a long time, I would let the kids pick out one or two things a week to add to what I would normally buy. When what he picked was gone, Samuel would scour the cupboards for foods he liked and might end up with a bowl of sprinkles left over from a birthday. Or he would look through the cupboards and not find anything he wanted to eat. I know I can starve him into eating more, but I do not want to do that.
>
> About two months ago, I started buying everything that Samuel wanted at the the grocery. I was hoping that if he got excited about food, he would be more willing to eat everything he sometimes eats, and maybe try new things. He is still only eating a few things.
>
> A few years ago used to eat tons a fruit and a few veggies and muffins and cheese. His diet is now so limited and so low in nutrition I'm not sure how he stays healthy, although he is. He sometimes has low energy, but I don't see any other physical problems. He is almost never sick.
>
> We have repeatedly tried monkey platters, but not with much success. He sticks to the same few choices. When he does try something, watermelon a few months ago and cheese the other day, he does not like it. When he was younger he had a lot of allergies but has mostly outgrown them. His reactions are now very mild or non-existent. He was allergic to milk, soy, HFCS, and possibly nuts.
>
> I would really like some suggestions as I have tried everything I can think of.
>
> Amanda
> Eli 8, Samuel 6
>
Robyn L. Coburn
> Getting Beyond Yuck, Part 1 Helping your picky eater.(Full disclosure: I love Aletha Solter's writing.)
> http://www.handinhandparenting.org/csArticles/articles/000009/000900.htm
> There is also a part 2 on the website.
>
> Six Year old is a terrible eater:
> http://www.awareparenting.com/answer17.htm
>
I would say that there is a big difference between those two articles. The
first one continues to be about "getting" the child to eat what the parents
think the child should be eating with a bunch of strategies. It is not
really about helping the picky eater - who probably doesn't consider him or
herself "picky" or in need of any help. Picky is a judgmental adult's label.
It's about ways for the parent to feel better about being a good provider of
food or something. I don't like it much, even though the little games are
cute.
There was a moment when the author says something about a father playing an
eating game with his "picky" young daughter and how if it were up to the
child they would have continued playing for an hour (but they didn't with
the implication that an hour would just have been unreasonably long to
spend). Well my experience is that unschooling parents routinely play with
their children for as long as their children ask them to - routinely as in
most of the time they make interacting the priority for its own sake, not
with some kind of ulterior motive.
The second (Aletha's) is about finding acceptance by trusting your child.
For me the first article can be safely ignored as being the nice end of
conventional parenting, the second reinforces exactly what long time
unschoolers have found.
Robyn L. Coburn
www.Iggyjingles.etsy.com\
www.iggyjingles.blogspot.com
www.allthingsdoll.blogspot.com
John and Amanda Slater
Getting Beyond Yuck, Part 1 Helping your picky eater.
I'm not sure whether to buy every food he likes and keep the house stocked at all times with every type of chip, candy, cookie, and ice cream he likes so food is more fun. Or if I should buy a little of that and more of the food I want him to have. Or lots of one food and a variety of everything else. I have tried all of these for a few months at a time, and he is still having 3 rolls of smarties for breakfast and cheetos for lunch and ice cream for dinner.
However, he is healthy so I maybe I should let him continue on what he is doing. He is 6 1/2, 50 lbs and 48 inches. He is rarely sick. It is very hard to see him eat like this. I have no idea how his body is getting what it needs. The only vegetable-type food is ketchup and the closest thing to fruit is lemonade made from lemon juice. He does like cod liver oil and his multi-vitamin, maybe he is living on those?
Amanda
Eli 8, Samuel 6
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> http://www.handinha ndparenting. org/csArticles/ articles/ 000009/000900. htmI did not like the tone of the first article. We never sit at the table making Samuel cry about the foods he does not want to eat. We never have. I really am not trying so much get him to eat foods he does not like, just trying to get him to eat the ones he likes more regularly.
> There is also a part 2 on the website.
> Six Year old is a terrible eater:The tone was more respectful here, but still did not answer my question about how to shop. That is the only part I can control and I'm not sure which way to go.
> http://www.awarepar enting.com/ answer17. htm
I'm not sure whether to buy every food he likes and keep the house stocked at all times with every type of chip, candy, cookie, and ice cream he likes so food is more fun. Or if I should buy a little of that and more of the food I want him to have. Or lots of one food and a variety of everything else. I have tried all of these for a few months at a time, and he is still having 3 rolls of smarties for breakfast and cheetos for lunch and ice cream for dinner.
However, he is healthy so I maybe I should let him continue on what he is doing. He is 6 1/2, 50 lbs and 48 inches. He is rarely sick. It is very hard to see him eat like this. I have no idea how his body is getting what it needs. The only vegetable-type food is ketchup and the closest thing to fruit is lemonade made from lemon juice. He does like cod liver oil and his multi-vitamin, maybe he is living on those?
Amanda
Eli 8, Samuel 6
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Angela Shaw
I'm wondering what your own diet is like. Do you prepare foods for your
family that include cut up fruits and veggies, dips, nuts, fresh breads or
what have you and do you all eat them and enjoy them? While my younger
daughter has always eaten less of a variety than the rest of us, I find she
does eat fruits, veggies, and whole grains more often when they are prepared
and we are all enjoying them. She loves fresh raw green beans, carrots,
corn on the cob, and she loves fresh fruit. In the absence of those items,
she'll eat easy to find things that are sweet like Poptarts.
Time and exposure to new foods will open up his world more. I wouldn't push
it or he may push back by being resistant to the idea. Just keep eating a
wide variety yourself. I find that kids learn best by example.
Angela
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
family that include cut up fruits and veggies, dips, nuts, fresh breads or
what have you and do you all eat them and enjoy them? While my younger
daughter has always eaten less of a variety than the rest of us, I find she
does eat fruits, veggies, and whole grains more often when they are prepared
and we are all enjoying them. She loves fresh raw green beans, carrots,
corn on the cob, and she loves fresh fruit. In the absence of those items,
she'll eat easy to find things that are sweet like Poptarts.
Time and exposure to new foods will open up his world more. I wouldn't push
it or he may push back by being resistant to the idea. Just keep eating a
wide variety yourself. I find that kids learn best by example.
Angela
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-
I'm not sure whether to buy every food he likes and keep the house
stocked at all times with every type of chip, candy, cookie, and ice
cream he likes so food is more fun. Or if I should buy a little of
that and more of the food I want him to have. Or lots of one food and
a variety of everything else. I have tried all of these for a few
months at a time, and he is still having 3 rolls of smarties for
breakfast and cheetos for lunch and ice cream for dinner. -=-
Buy what you want to buy to make meals. Ask if he wants something.
Get a thing or two.
"Every type of chip, candy, cookie and ice cream" doesn't even make
sense.
If you used to seriously limit foods and that came with a lot of
messages about how important it was and how wrong and bad he was to
want other food, then it will take longer for it to change back,
maybe, but you can make food fun without filling the house up with
"every type" of anything.
-=-I have tried all of these for a few months at a time, and he is
still having 3 rolls of smarties for breakfast and cheetos for lunch
and ice cream for dinner. -=-
Are you saying "What do you want for breakfast?" without making
something that smells good, or some pretty pancakes, or a bowl of
cereal with berries or bananas? Are you leaving choices entirely
(including ideas) to little kids? Are you cooking stuff they'll like?
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
I'm not sure whether to buy every food he likes and keep the house
stocked at all times with every type of chip, candy, cookie, and ice
cream he likes so food is more fun. Or if I should buy a little of
that and more of the food I want him to have. Or lots of one food and
a variety of everything else. I have tried all of these for a few
months at a time, and he is still having 3 rolls of smarties for
breakfast and cheetos for lunch and ice cream for dinner. -=-
Buy what you want to buy to make meals. Ask if he wants something.
Get a thing or two.
"Every type of chip, candy, cookie and ice cream" doesn't even make
sense.
If you used to seriously limit foods and that came with a lot of
messages about how important it was and how wrong and bad he was to
want other food, then it will take longer for it to change back,
maybe, but you can make food fun without filling the house up with
"every type" of anything.
-=-I have tried all of these for a few months at a time, and he is
still having 3 rolls of smarties for breakfast and cheetos for lunch
and ice cream for dinner. -=-
Are you saying "What do you want for breakfast?" without making
something that smells good, or some pretty pancakes, or a bowl of
cereal with berries or bananas? Are you leaving choices entirely
(including ideas) to little kids? Are you cooking stuff they'll like?
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
sandralynndodd
-=-Here are a couple of articles which I hope help:-=-
I probably shouldn't have let that post through. Please keep the list toward unschooling information, or describe articles you bring here rather than just bringing links.
I don't mind people with only toddlers or babies being on the list, but let those who have unschooled a lot provide answers while newer moms ask the questions, please.
Sandra
I probably shouldn't have let that post through. Please keep the list toward unschooling information, or describe articles you bring here rather than just bringing links.
I don't mind people with only toddlers or babies being on the list, but let those who have unschooled a lot provide answers while newer moms ask the questions, please.
Sandra
Marina DeLuca-Howard
When I was a LLL leader people used to marvel at my son's obvious enjoyment
of grapefruit. My secret was that I liked grapefruit, and that I had never
strapped him to a high chair and force fed him. There were many snacks I
bought just for me, assuming young wouldn't eat them. My salad plate
inevitably got hijacked--children leaving the cookies aside to try my
crunchy salad. If meals are fun and social and by invitation children will
join in. If you eat monkey plates so will your kids--especially if it is a
family affair with a tea party to boot! We had lots of fun tea parties with
fun finger foods and candles!
Rowan is the most adventurous--and I discovered a short time ago homemade
granola was his fav. The other guys also love homemade granola. We just
melt some butter, maple syrup and water on low in the oven and spend a
couple of hours mixing it on low heat. We have added dried cranberries,
currents, nuts, seeds and coconut. It is so much fun. Martin and Crispin
enjoy making it and eating it as well! I assumed my kids preferred bought
cereals because they asked for them, until Rowan told me otherwise.
I would normally buy.
I also experimented with giving my guys money for food with lots of success
and I highly recommend putting the six year old in charge. Rowan did a
fabulous job at about age three of doing the grocery shopping for our then
family of three. You might find yourself eating exotic mushrooms, red
peppers, lychee fruit and all kinds of surprises.
I "forgot" about this success and it took me a while to twig that I could
have fun with food and kids again. When Martin shopped with me he was only
interested in buying ice cream and candy, but when he held fifty dollars in
his pocket he was on a menu planning mission. On those days no ice cream
was bought--but lots of chicken, scallops, shrimp, cheese, and artichokes
came home with us. Martin doesn't eat potatoes so of course there were no
potatoes bought on his trips to the market.
I endorse putting the kids in charge of the food budget! Please do not try
to "manipulate" children into eating what's "good" for them. It doesn't
work. Instead adopt a healthy diet yourself, and enjoy your food--they will
enjoy theirs too, and will mooch all your special treats!
Marina
--
Rent our cottage: http://davehoward.ca/cottage/
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
of grapefruit. My secret was that I liked grapefruit, and that I had never
strapped him to a high chair and force fed him. There were many snacks I
bought just for me, assuming young wouldn't eat them. My salad plate
inevitably got hijacked--children leaving the cookies aside to try my
crunchy salad. If meals are fun and social and by invitation children will
join in. If you eat monkey plates so will your kids--especially if it is a
family affair with a tea party to boot! We had lots of fun tea parties with
fun finger foods and candles!
Rowan is the most adventurous--and I discovered a short time ago homemade
granola was his fav. The other guys also love homemade granola. We just
melt some butter, maple syrup and water on low in the oven and spend a
couple of hours mixing it on low heat. We have added dried cranberries,
currents, nuts, seeds and coconut. It is so much fun. Martin and Crispin
enjoy making it and eating it as well! I assumed my kids preferred bought
cereals because they asked for them, until Rowan told me otherwise.
>We have never restricted his diet or made him eat anything. For a longtime, I would let the kids pick >out one or two things a week to add to what
I would normally buy.
I also experimented with giving my guys money for food with lots of success
and I highly recommend putting the six year old in charge. Rowan did a
fabulous job at about age three of doing the grocery shopping for our then
family of three. You might find yourself eating exotic mushrooms, red
peppers, lychee fruit and all kinds of surprises.
I "forgot" about this success and it took me a while to twig that I could
have fun with food and kids again. When Martin shopped with me he was only
interested in buying ice cream and candy, but when he held fifty dollars in
his pocket he was on a menu planning mission. On those days no ice cream
was bought--but lots of chicken, scallops, shrimp, cheese, and artichokes
came home with us. Martin doesn't eat potatoes so of course there were no
potatoes bought on his trips to the market.
I endorse putting the kids in charge of the food budget! Please do not try
to "manipulate" children into eating what's "good" for them. It doesn't
work. Instead adopt a healthy diet yourself, and enjoy your food--they will
enjoy theirs too, and will mooch all your special treats!
Marina
--
Rent our cottage: http://davehoward.ca/cottage/
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-I endorse putting the kids in charge of the food budget! Please do
not try
to "manipulate" children into eating what's "good" for them.-=-
I agree with the second part. I don't a child should be "in charge"
of anything that affects the whole family. Letting a child do the
grocery shopping sometimes seems fine, but wouldn't there be a list of
things other people needed or wanted? Staples? Regular purchases?
Longterm and perpetual budgeting as a child's responsibility doesn't
make sense to me.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
not try
to "manipulate" children into eating what's "good" for them.-=-
I agree with the second part. I don't a child should be "in charge"
of anything that affects the whole family. Letting a child do the
grocery shopping sometimes seems fine, but wouldn't there be a list of
things other people needed or wanted? Staples? Regular purchases?
Longterm and perpetual budgeting as a child's responsibility doesn't
make sense to me.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
John and Amanda Slater
Buy what you want to buy to make meals. Ask if he wants something.
Get a thing or two.
***We tried this for a long time. What ends up happening is when we run out of what he has requested, in a day or two, he turns down everything we offer and looks until he finds something he wants (chocolate chips or something) or does not eat anything. I know I can starve him into eating, but I'm not sure I want to.*****
If you used to seriously limit foods and that came with a lot of
messages about how important it was and how wrong and bad he was to
want other food, then it will take longer for it to change back,
maybe, but you can make food fun without filling the house up with
"every type" of anything.****
We have never limited food. Once we told Eli he had to eat something, then John and I looked at each other and wondered how that would work. We backed off immediately. Another time John told Eli he could not could not have any more rice cakes till he ate his pizza. It only took saying out loud to hear how silly that was. We got both instances out of our system before Samuel was even born.
I'm not sure how to make food more fun when he refuses to try anything. I have tried monkey platters and making food into pictures. Neither one worked great for Samuel.
*******
Are you saying "What do you want for breakfast?" without making
something that smells good, or some pretty pancakes, or a bowl of
cereal with berries or bananas? Are you leaving choices entirely
(including ideas) to little kids? Are you cooking stuff they'll like?
****We do offer choices that I know he sometimes eats. Right now that is limited to chicken fingers with ketchup, 1 type of cereal, homemade mac and cheese (but only fresh), pepperoni, yogurt tubes and a few weeks ago he had a smoothie (which he enjoyed, but has not eaten again.)
Today I have made two different types of smoothies, pumpkin bread, cut up a few apples, and made chicken fingers. We have cereal, bananas, grapes, oranges, carrots, and yogurt ready in the fridge. He ate the chicken fingers and passed up the rest. I think he has otherwise only eaten marshmallows and a popsicle.
The rest of the family tries to eat simply. We try to eat lots of fruits (I keep these ready in the fridge) and veggies (raw or grilled in the summer, soups in the winter). Eli likes meat so we do steak, tacos, or hamburgers every few days. I make most of our baked goods and there is normally sandwich bread and some type of fruit bread. I offer mac and cheese every few days, but he won't eat it unless he agrees first, and will not eat it left over. We occasionally have pasta and pizza. He is always offered what we are having.
I just don't know what else to do.
Thanks for the questions and suggestions,AmandaEli 8, Samuel 6
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Get a thing or two.
***We tried this for a long time. What ends up happening is when we run out of what he has requested, in a day or two, he turns down everything we offer and looks until he finds something he wants (chocolate chips or something) or does not eat anything. I know I can starve him into eating, but I'm not sure I want to.*****
If you used to seriously limit foods and that came with a lot of
messages about how important it was and how wrong and bad he was to
want other food, then it will take longer for it to change back,
maybe, but you can make food fun without filling the house up with
"every type" of anything.****
We have never limited food. Once we told Eli he had to eat something, then John and I looked at each other and wondered how that would work. We backed off immediately. Another time John told Eli he could not could not have any more rice cakes till he ate his pizza. It only took saying out loud to hear how silly that was. We got both instances out of our system before Samuel was even born.
I'm not sure how to make food more fun when he refuses to try anything. I have tried monkey platters and making food into pictures. Neither one worked great for Samuel.
*******
Are you saying "What do you want for breakfast?" without making
something that smells good, or some pretty pancakes, or a bowl of
cereal with berries or bananas? Are you leaving choices entirely
(including ideas) to little kids? Are you cooking stuff they'll like?
****We do offer choices that I know he sometimes eats. Right now that is limited to chicken fingers with ketchup, 1 type of cereal, homemade mac and cheese (but only fresh), pepperoni, yogurt tubes and a few weeks ago he had a smoothie (which he enjoyed, but has not eaten again.)
Today I have made two different types of smoothies, pumpkin bread, cut up a few apples, and made chicken fingers. We have cereal, bananas, grapes, oranges, carrots, and yogurt ready in the fridge. He ate the chicken fingers and passed up the rest. I think he has otherwise only eaten marshmallows and a popsicle.
The rest of the family tries to eat simply. We try to eat lots of fruits (I keep these ready in the fridge) and veggies (raw or grilled in the summer, soups in the winter). Eli likes meat so we do steak, tacos, or hamburgers every few days. I make most of our baked goods and there is normally sandwich bread and some type of fruit bread. I offer mac and cheese every few days, but he won't eat it unless he agrees first, and will not eat it left over. We occasionally have pasta and pizza. He is always offered what we are having.
I just don't know what else to do.
Thanks for the questions and suggestions,AmandaEli 8, Samuel 6
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
So how do we go about this since we do not eat meat? I am against killing animals for nourishment. Do we let him decide?
----- Original Message -----
From: John and Amanda Slater
Date: Wednesday, August 26, 2009 3:56 pm
Subject: Re: [AlwaysLearning] Re: food
To: [email protected]
>
>
>
>
> Buy what you want to buy to make meals. Ask if he wants
> something.
>
> Get a thing or two.
> ***We tried this for a long time. What ends up happening is
> when we run out of what he has requested, in a day or two, he
> turns down everything we offer and looks until he finds
> something he wants (chocolate chips or something) or does not
> eat anything. I know I can starve him into eating, but I'm not
> sure I want to.*****
>
>
>
>
>
> If you used to seriously limit foods and that came with a lot of
>
>
> messages about how important it was and how wrong and bad he was
> to
>
> want other food, then it will take longer for it to change back,
>
>
> maybe, but you can make food fun without filling the house up
> with
>
> "every type" of anything.****
> We have never limited food. Once we told Eli he had to eat
> something, then John and I looked at each other and wondered how
> that would work. We backed off immediately. Another time John
> told Eli he could not could not have any more rice cakes till he
> ate his pizza. It only took saying out loud to hear how silly
> that was. We got both instances out of our system before Samuel
> was even born.
> I'm not sure how to make food more fun when he refuses to try
> anything. I have tried monkey platters and making food into
> pictures. Neither one worked great for Samuel.
> *******
>
>
> Are you saying "What do you want for breakfast?" without making
>
> something that smells good, or some pretty pancakes, or a bowl
> of
>
> cereal with berries or bananas? Are you leaving choices entirely
>
>
> (including ideas) to little kids? Are you cooking stuff they'll like?
> ****We do offer choices that I know he sometimes eats. Right
> now that is limited to chicken fingers with ketchup, 1 type of
> cereal, homemade mac and cheese (but only fresh), pepperoni,
> yogurt tubes and a few weeks ago he had a smoothie (which he
> enjoyed, but has not eaten again.)
>
> Today I have made two different types of smoothies, pumpkin
> bread, cut up a few apples, and made chicken fingers. We have
> cereal, bananas, grapes, oranges, carrots, and yogurt ready in
> the fridge. He ate the chicken fingers and passed up the rest.
> I think he has otherwise only eaten marshmallows and a popsicle.
> The rest of the family tries to eat simply. We try to eat lots
> of fruits (I keep these ready in the fridge) and veggies (raw or
> grilled in the summer, soups in the winter). Eli likes meat so
> we do steak, tacos, or hamburgers every few days. I make most
> of our baked goods and there is normally sandwich bread and some
> type of fruit bread. I offer mac and cheese every few days, but
> he won't eat it unless he agrees first, and will not eat it left
> over. We occasionally have pasta and pizza. He is always
> offered what we are having.
> I just don't know what else to do.
> Thanks for the questions and suggestions,AmandaEli 8, Samuel 6
>
>
>
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
"Intelligent people talk about ideas, mediocre people talk about events, dumb people talk about people."
Eleanor Roosevelt
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Marina DeLuca-Howard
>>I don't a child should be "in charge"Soap, tissues and paper towels are unlikely to make their list :)
>>of anything that affects the whole family. Letting a child do the
>>grocery shopping sometimes seems fine, but wouldn't there be a list of
>>things other people needed or wanted? Staples? Regular purchases?
I found they weren't interested in planning on a regular basis, but it did
work on occasion to hand over some or all the cash, and remind them we
needed meals for a few days. I did come up with my own grocery list of
things I wanted like flour, vanilla, buttermilk, baking powder and my fav.
foods, which I purchased or asked them to keep in mind.
I noticed Martin (9) did pick out foods he thought I would like for dinner,
and he made a point of asking me questions to insure his parents didn't
starve. He wanted the meals to work for everyone and really enjoyed this
challenge of being "in charge".
The kids didn't go alone, but I made it a point not to interfere, unless we
were over budget to point out they hadn't enough food in the buggy to cover
enough meals. The guidelines I provided--questions--were along the lines of
as 'can you think of what would be a good breakfast, lunch and dinner for
the next four days that you could buy for X dollars'.
We did manage to stay on a budget and it is less overwhelming to be asked
what you want for breakfast, lunch and dinner than " what should we buy"?.
The kids often just give me a list if they don't feel like going. I don't
shop once a week, so I found I can give the kids free reign on one of the
days. Anything we left out I could get another time.
It worked for me to have some advice and guidelines and a budget available
and we talked about what we thought would work for the family.
Marina
--
Rent our cottage: http://davehoward.ca/cottage/
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
John and Amanda Slater
--- On Wed, 8/26/09, Angela Shaw <game-enthusiast@...> wrote:
Time and exposure to new foods will open up his world more. I wouldn't push
it or he may push back by being resistant to the idea. Just keep eating a
wide variety yourself. I find that kids learn best by example.
****This is mostly what we are doing. I have observed Eli getting hungrier this year. I am hoping Samuel soon does the same. I'm just not sure how his body is going to find thee nutrients it needs on his diet. He is getting much more limited as time goes by. Not too long ago he ate bread, cheese, strawberries and granola. Now he won't eat any of these.
Will his choices expand again and how can I help?
AmandaEli 8, Samuel 6
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Robyn L. Coburn
<<<< I just don't know what else to do.>>>>
Change your goal from "widening his diet" to "finding calm acceptance".
You have said several times that he appears healthy. I think it is truly
time to stop worrying and allow nature to take its course. Trust that he
will expand his food choices as his nutritional needs increase with age and
growth. Keep having a variety available and release your anxiety. It might
take a whispered mantra, deep breathing, putting a big smile and saying
"sure honey", or the mental affirmation "All is Well".
Truly I think this problem is in no way about your son's diet, but about
finding ways for you to let go of your desire to control his food intake.
That is where your real struggle is.
Change you, not him. This is what I did and do every day with the challenges
my daughter presents to my assumptions and beliefs.
(I suspect this is unlikely from what you have said, but....) Is eating the
only place where your son has choices as you have described? Are there other
parts of his life that are controlled or manipulated, so that this is where
he exercises his only control? If so that might be a clue as to why he is
determined to protect his food choices.
OTOH if he is living in joy, with lots of choices and support to engage his
passions, then I can only think that he is well and happy with the food that
is available to him and so his food choices are mindful and healthful.
Robyn L. Coburn
www.Iggyjingles.etsy.com
www.iggyjingles.blogspot.com
www.allthingsdoll.blogspot.com
Change your goal from "widening his diet" to "finding calm acceptance".
You have said several times that he appears healthy. I think it is truly
time to stop worrying and allow nature to take its course. Trust that he
will expand his food choices as his nutritional needs increase with age and
growth. Keep having a variety available and release your anxiety. It might
take a whispered mantra, deep breathing, putting a big smile and saying
"sure honey", or the mental affirmation "All is Well".
Truly I think this problem is in no way about your son's diet, but about
finding ways for you to let go of your desire to control his food intake.
That is where your real struggle is.
Change you, not him. This is what I did and do every day with the challenges
my daughter presents to my assumptions and beliefs.
(I suspect this is unlikely from what you have said, but....) Is eating the
only place where your son has choices as you have described? Are there other
parts of his life that are controlled or manipulated, so that this is where
he exercises his only control? If so that might be a clue as to why he is
determined to protect his food choices.
OTOH if he is living in joy, with lots of choices and support to engage his
passions, then I can only think that he is well and happy with the food that
is available to him and so his food choices are mindful and healthful.
Robyn L. Coburn
www.Iggyjingles.etsy.com
www.iggyjingles.blogspot.com
www.allthingsdoll.blogspot.com
Sandra Dodd
-=-Eli likes meat so we do steak, tacos, or hamburgers every few
days. I make most of our baked goods and there is normally sandwich
bread and some type of fruit bread. I offer mac and cheese every few
days, but he won't eat it unless he agrees first, and will not eat it
left over. We occasionally have pasta and pizza. He is always
offered what we are having. =-
If the food is there, he's having protein sometimes and fruit (or at
least popsicles--will he eat real-fruit popsicles sometimes?) I
wouldn't worry, then.
I know someone who lived on just donuts and sweet rolls for over a
year, when she was 18 or so. She's fine.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
days. I make most of our baked goods and there is normally sandwich
bread and some type of fruit bread. I offer mac and cheese every few
days, but he won't eat it unless he agrees first, and will not eat it
left over. We occasionally have pasta and pizza. He is always
offered what we are having. =-
If the food is there, he's having protein sometimes and fruit (or at
least popsicles--will he eat real-fruit popsicles sometimes?) I
wouldn't worry, then.
I know someone who lived on just donuts and sweet rolls for over a
year, when she was 18 or so. She's fine.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-The guidelines I provided--questions--were along the lines of
as 'can you think of what would be a good breakfast, lunch and dinner
for
the next four days that you could buy for X dollars'.-=-
It sounds a little like a test, when you put it that way.
That probably sounds critical, but what I want it to be is an
examination of what helps natural learning and good relationships
thrive.
The purpose of having food in the house is beyond practice or someone
being "in charge" of it. If anyone's "in charge" it's the mom by
default and the dad as backup. Unless there's something seriously
wrong with the mom and dad, no child should be "in charge" of
maintaining the family.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
as 'can you think of what would be a good breakfast, lunch and dinner
for
the next four days that you could buy for X dollars'.-=-
It sounds a little like a test, when you put it that way.
That probably sounds critical, but what I want it to be is an
examination of what helps natural learning and good relationships
thrive.
The purpose of having food in the house is beyond practice or someone
being "in charge" of it. If anyone's "in charge" it's the mom by
default and the dad as backup. Unless there's something seriously
wrong with the mom and dad, no child should be "in charge" of
maintaining the family.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-So how do we go about this since we do not eat meat? I am against
killing animals for nourishment. Do we let him decide?-=-
He lives where you live.
Unschooling works well with choices.
Whether unschooling will work well at your house depends on you and
your house!
What we can do is help you see what has worked well in our own and
some other families. Any "yeah but" exceptions you claim will be
yours to figure out, I think.
Since cave-man days, only a few people killed animals. The others did
other tasks to contribute. If you yourself aren't killing animals,
there probably wouldn't have been any time in the past however-many-
hundred-thousand-years that you would've been expected to do so. So
possibly review your beliefs and priorities, and if your son's
preferences rank below your philosophical beliefs, that will be
between you and him.
For unschooling to work best, it helps for learning and peaceful
relations to be among the highest priorities.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
killing animals for nourishment. Do we let him decide?-=-
He lives where you live.
Unschooling works well with choices.
Whether unschooling will work well at your house depends on you and
your house!
What we can do is help you see what has worked well in our own and
some other families. Any "yeah but" exceptions you claim will be
yours to figure out, I think.
Since cave-man days, only a few people killed animals. The others did
other tasks to contribute. If you yourself aren't killing animals,
there probably wouldn't have been any time in the past however-many-
hundred-thousand-years that you would've been expected to do so. So
possibly review your beliefs and priorities, and if your son's
preferences rank below your philosophical beliefs, that will be
between you and him.
For unschooling to work best, it helps for learning and peaceful
relations to be among the highest priorities.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Schuyler
We've had vegetarians and omnivores in the house at the same time. I'm not dictating my moral decisions to my children and they aren't dictating theirs to me. David and I make sure that everyone has options that they are comfortable with for every meal. If Simon wants steak and Linnaea wants beans that's the way we go.
A big part of unschooling is recognizing that your choices are your choices. If you are choosing to clean the house, it doesn't make it everyone else's responsibility to tidy up too. It's your desire to have a clean house that motivates your actions. If you choose to not eat meat, that is your choice and if you have a child who likes meat, then that's his choice.
Schuyler
________________________________
From: "avendanom@..." <avendanom@...>
To: [email protected]
Sent: Wednesday, 26 August, 2009 8:57:07 PM
Subject: Re: [AlwaysLearning] Re: food
So how do we go about this since we do not eat meat? I am against killing animals for nourishment. Do we let him decide?
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
A big part of unschooling is recognizing that your choices are your choices. If you are choosing to clean the house, it doesn't make it everyone else's responsibility to tidy up too. It's your desire to have a clean house that motivates your actions. If you choose to not eat meat, that is your choice and if you have a child who likes meat, then that's his choice.
Schuyler
________________________________
From: "avendanom@..." <avendanom@...>
To: [email protected]
Sent: Wednesday, 26 August, 2009 8:57:07 PM
Subject: Re: [AlwaysLearning] Re: food
So how do we go about this since we do not eat meat? I am against killing animals for nourishment. Do we let him decide?
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Lyla Wolfenstein
maybe it would help to reverse the situation in our minds? what if the parent ate meat but the child is vegan, as opposed to the parent being vegetarian? that is our situation here, and i never questioned whether i would cook vegan food for my daughter. of course i do! i don't think it should be any different if the parent is a vegetarian or vegan...
Lyla
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Lyla
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-i don't think it should be any different if the parent is a
vegetarian or vegan...-=-
It's easier to turn down meat and eat alternatives than it is to make
a meat alternative if the main cook is squeamish or opposed.
There are buffet restaurants, though, and drive-throughs, where other
people are already cooking meat.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
vegetarian or vegan...-=-
It's easier to turn down meat and eat alternatives than it is to make
a meat alternative if the main cook is squeamish or opposed.
There are buffet restaurants, though, and drive-throughs, where other
people are already cooking meat.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
ridingmom1
--- In [email protected], avendanom@... wrote:
My daughter is very sensitive about what foods she will eat, and I wonder how many of those foods might just not agree with her. Her father had a lot of food allergies as a child, and her brother gets an itchy throat when he eats cantaloup, avocado, tomatoes, pineapple and something else I'm forgetting right now. She may have allergies as well, and is instinctively avoiding triggers. I don't know.
But I think it can work the other way--that we may instinctively know what we need, and we don't want to get in the way of that for our kids.
The killing animals thing could be a pretty strong statement for a child to process. And every industrial farming practice we use kills animals for food production--just some aren't well advertised.
Joanna
>If a child has a need for, or a need to avoid, a food, that would be supported in an unschooling household.
> So how do we go about this since we do not eat meat? I am against killing animals for nourishment. Do we let him decide?
>
My daughter is very sensitive about what foods she will eat, and I wonder how many of those foods might just not agree with her. Her father had a lot of food allergies as a child, and her brother gets an itchy throat when he eats cantaloup, avocado, tomatoes, pineapple and something else I'm forgetting right now. She may have allergies as well, and is instinctively avoiding triggers. I don't know.
But I think it can work the other way--that we may instinctively know what we need, and we don't want to get in the way of that for our kids.
The killing animals thing could be a pretty strong statement for a child to process. And every industrial farming practice we use kills animals for food production--just some aren't well advertised.
Joanna
Angela Shaw
<Will his choices expand again and how can I help?>
I personally know no adults who eat as limited a variety of foods as you
describe your son eating at this point in his life. So, likely his
repertoire will expand. That said, some people (my in-laws for example)
prefer bland foods and a much smaller variety than I do. They take comfort
in knowing they will like what they eat if they always eat the same stuff.
=) They aren't unhealthy. They are just different than I am. I LOVE to
try new foods. I LOVE variety and spice.
I'm not sure what else you can do to help other than being a good example
and laying off on him. If he feels that you are trying to control his
consumption in anyway, it's possible he'll feel rebellious and do the
opposite of what you want. Some kids are laid back and some kids really do
not like to feel controlled and will let you know immediately when you get
controlling by their response to your behaviors.
Be a good example. Make healthy snacks an easy choice. (which it sounds
like you already do) RELAX!
Angela (who knows it isn't always easy to relax)
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
I personally know no adults who eat as limited a variety of foods as you
describe your son eating at this point in his life. So, likely his
repertoire will expand. That said, some people (my in-laws for example)
prefer bland foods and a much smaller variety than I do. They take comfort
in knowing they will like what they eat if they always eat the same stuff.
=) They aren't unhealthy. They are just different than I am. I LOVE to
try new foods. I LOVE variety and spice.
I'm not sure what else you can do to help other than being a good example
and laying off on him. If he feels that you are trying to control his
consumption in anyway, it's possible he'll feel rebellious and do the
opposite of what you want. Some kids are laid back and some kids really do
not like to feel controlled and will let you know immediately when you get
controlling by their response to your behaviors.
Be a good example. Make healthy snacks an easy choice. (which it sounds
like you already do) RELAX!
Angela (who knows it isn't always easy to relax)
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
adesah
As soon as my kids were old enough, I taught them how to make a few basics (ramen noodles, hot dogs, pb&j, cereal) that are healthy enough and that they like.
I do *not* wait on people who don't like what I've made when I've already worked hard to prepare a meal. I *do* take everyone's tastes into account and try to please them, but if they don't like what I've made , they've learned to tell me so kindly ("I don't care for that" instead of "Yuck!"). Then they're welcome to make themselves something that they *do* like. As long as they don't ask me to make a second meal (which would be unfair to me), I won't force them to eat what I've made (which would be unfair to them).
My .02~
Adesa
I do *not* wait on people who don't like what I've made when I've already worked hard to prepare a meal. I *do* take everyone's tastes into account and try to please them, but if they don't like what I've made , they've learned to tell me so kindly ("I don't care for that" instead of "Yuck!"). Then they're welcome to make themselves something that they *do* like. As long as they don't ask me to make a second meal (which would be unfair to me), I won't force them to eat what I've made (which would be unfair to them).
My .02~
Adesa
John and Amanda Slater
Thanks for all the suggestions. Rehearing what I already know is good. There is no where else to go with these types of questions but a board like this. I cannot even admit in public what he eats for not wanting to hear others reaction to his diet.
He is really a kid who likes what he likes. A certain plate, a certain chair, certain spoon, certain clothes. It is not surprising he likes certain foods. I try to remember it works both ways, he is just as discriminating about sweet food as he is about the rest of it. He will not drink kool-aid, cola, many types of chips, most kinds of ice cream, or most candy.
I will continue doing what we are doing. I will get more proactive about putting foods in front of the kids and myself.
On that thought, I would like to get two divided trays with covers. Any suggestions? I'm thinking one to keep in the fridge and one to keep on the counter. I put monkey platters together, but cannot cover and keep them.
Thanks so much,
Amanda
Eli 8, Samuel 6
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
He is really a kid who likes what he likes. A certain plate, a certain chair, certain spoon, certain clothes. It is not surprising he likes certain foods. I try to remember it works both ways, he is just as discriminating about sweet food as he is about the rest of it. He will not drink kool-aid, cola, many types of chips, most kinds of ice cream, or most candy.
I will continue doing what we are doing. I will get more proactive about putting foods in front of the kids and myself.
On that thought, I would like to get two divided trays with covers. Any suggestions? I'm thinking one to keep in the fridge and one to keep on the counter. I put monkey platters together, but cannot cover and keep them.
Thanks so much,
Amanda
Eli 8, Samuel 6
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Jason & Stephanie
He is really a kid who likes what he likes. A certain plate, a certain chair, certain spoon, certain clothes. It is not surprising he likes certain foods. I try to remember it works both ways, he is just as discriminating about sweet food as he is about the rest of it. He will not drink kool-aid, cola, many types of chips, most kinds of ice cream, or most candy.
****He sounds just like Jared, he will only eat a couple of foods, doesn't want to try anything new. I ask him a few times a week or offer him something we are eating, he doesn't want it.
He is healthy so I am not too worried at this time. He only uses certain plates, bowls, cups and utensils also. If his dish is dirty I wash it, I have offered different dishes, he doesn't want them.
We need to trust them and offer new things and allow them to decide :)
Stephanie
http://www.learningthroughliving-stephanie.blogspot.com
"It's not that I feel that school is a good idea gone wrong," he says, "but a wrong idea from the word go. It's a nutty notion that we can have a place where nothing but learning happens, cut off from the rest of life."
~John Holt
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
****He sounds just like Jared, he will only eat a couple of foods, doesn't want to try anything new. I ask him a few times a week or offer him something we are eating, he doesn't want it.
He is healthy so I am not too worried at this time. He only uses certain plates, bowls, cups and utensils also. If his dish is dirty I wash it, I have offered different dishes, he doesn't want them.
We need to trust them and offer new things and allow them to decide :)
Stephanie
http://www.learningthroughliving-stephanie.blogspot.com
"It's not that I feel that school is a good idea gone wrong," he says, "but a wrong idea from the word go. It's a nutty notion that we can have a place where nothing but learning happens, cut off from the rest of life."
~John Holt
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-As soon as my kids were old enough, I taught them how to make a few
basics (ramen noodles, hot dogs, pb&j, cereal) that are healthy enough
and that they like. -=-
Did you really need to "teach them"? Did they watch you, figure it
out, did they learn how to make those things?
It's important, for unschooling thought.
-=- As long as they don't ask me to make a second meal (which would be
unfair to me), I won't force them to eat what I've made (which would
be unfair to them).
-=-
Tit for tat. Even Steven. You don't scratch their back if they don't
scratch your back.
It might seem "fair" to you. And it's basically what probably
happens at every house represented on this list, but if you think of
it in such harsh-but-"fair" terms, it's half a cup of rules instead of
half a cup of love.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
basics (ramen noodles, hot dogs, pb&j, cereal) that are healthy enough
and that they like. -=-
Did you really need to "teach them"? Did they watch you, figure it
out, did they learn how to make those things?
It's important, for unschooling thought.
-=- As long as they don't ask me to make a second meal (which would be
unfair to me), I won't force them to eat what I've made (which would
be unfair to them).
-=-
Tit for tat. Even Steven. You don't scratch their back if they don't
scratch your back.
It might seem "fair" to you. And it's basically what probably
happens at every house represented on this list, but if you think of
it in such harsh-but-"fair" terms, it's half a cup of rules instead of
half a cup of love.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]