I have been reading a lot of Sandra's page. Everyday I try to read a little- seems to keep me more centered. Funniest thing is the that the one thing that has helped the best is smelling my children's hair before I say anything. Isn't that weird of all the things I read that works the best to remember to be kind and loving. Who would have thought. Sandra Dodd says it on an audio or somewhere. If someone can locate the link that is great if it helps others. When I am close and hug them and smell them it is really hard to say something that is not sweet. They are older (8 and 11) so I didn't suspect it would work anymore but it does and it is lovely. Thanks Sandra.
—Rose Elly Dalton, July 29, 2017
Those are her kids in the photo →
Audio maybe: http://sandradodd.com/parentingpeacefully
I found several with the site search.
Rose Elly Dalton:
I think that maybe it is touch related also. There have been so many new studies about how we should hug longer.
I was feeling overwhelmed today. At one point, I was about to get out of the pool and tell the kids I was DONE. First I pulled my 3 year old close and smelled her hair, planning a quick hug before getting out. And then I closed my eyes and we just hung out in a hug for a minute with me smelling her hair. And I felt better.
Quotes from earlier discussions:
What did it take? It took being in Toys R Us one day and getting really hungry and getting really unhappy and recognising that the two things were linked. It took making sure that I wasn't hungry. It took smelling their heads when I was making lists of things that needed to be done away from them, a sort of biofeedback that pulled me back into them and turned my head from the chores that I was lining up to go and do. It took a growing awareness that they were at least as engaging and interesting as the things I was thinking of doing or that I was thinking would fill me up. And it took a real recognition that when I got "my time" it didn't satiate my needs, it didn't even begin to meet them.
Schuyler Waynforth, again, from a different discussion:
Look for ways to connect with them. There are biological ways. Smelling their heads is amazingly connective. At 11 and 14 it still works for me, but when they still had that new baby smell, that mussy, sweaty, sleepy, milky head smell, it switched massive switches for me. Look at them. Watch them talk or move or bounce or roll or whatever it is they are doing and marvel at the fact that they are.
Sandra Dodd, about what might help with post-partum depression, on the part of the mom:
Smell the baby's head!! Breathe it in slowly, don't sniff it. Inhale it gently and deeply. There is biochemical magic there.