facebook group created February 13, 2010
IF YOU ARE NEW:
New to unschooling? Read or ask questions.
There are tabs ("About" and "Files") everyone should read. but they're hard to find so the info is below
There is a free introductory course (in e-book form) for new unschoolers here: http://www.livingjoyfully.ca/ Thank you, Pam Laricchia!
There are notes for new unschoolers here, too, with links to those and many other resources: http://sandradodd.com/help
POSTING By Sandra Dodd on Monday, February 4, 2013 at 3:08pm
Ask a clear question or respond to a question.
POST CLEARLY. Proof-read.
If you provide a link, introduce it.
"RU" is a bad thing. Write out "unschooling." If you don't have time or energy to write that word out, you don't have enough time to post. (The problem is people try to pronounce it, and "are you" and "rue" are both already in use, in English.)
"Ridiculous" isn't nice. Anyone who might be tempted to use the word should not post anything at all. Also avoid telling people that what they're writing is "stupid." Avoid "LOL" for the same reasons.
"But English is not my native language..." Not an excuse for rudeness.
Joyce, library analogy and purpose
If you had no idea libraries existed, based on social gathering rules of behavior, they would seem unfriendly. If you tried to speak to people and were told to shush, it would feel shockingly unfriendly.
Presumably everyone here understands libraries and their special behavior. ;-) What most people *don't* know is that *not* all groups on social media are for social or support purposes.
The purpose of this group is to *analyze* family situations and ideas about unschooling in the light of radical unschooling principles. The purpose is to provide a radical unschooling mirror for those looking *specifically* for a radical unschooling response. One question answered here is "What does this look like from a radical unschooling perspective?"
What is especially different here is to respond directly to the words being read by members, to the picture those words paint, to not wash the image first with a presumption of best intent.
One reason for doing that is because responses are intended for everyone reading, not just the original poster. People reading are forming an image from the words. They want answers to the situation painted by the words.
This group is *not* everyone's cup of tea and it doesn't try to be. It works hard to be exactly what it promises for the people who like this approach to learning about radical unschooling. Unfortunately the people who want a different approach get mad when the group does what it promises then get angry at the group for not being what they want and assume.
To judge *any* groups' response based on social and support rules of behavior -- like judging the library that way -- will give a false impression of the group and its purpose.
The responses in this thread did take a harsh and emotionally laden tone while Sandra and moderators weren't available. But even so, even in a face to face social group, if people in a group aren't acting as you expect them to act, the best first response is to assume you've misunderstood the purpose of a group and inadvertently stepped on people's toes.
At the top of the page is pinned a post labeled "IF YOU ARE NEW". There is also an About page. It's polite if you've inadvertently stepped on toes to step back and find out more about a culture and the local rules and not immediately jump to the conclusion that you're right and everyone around you is wrong. If you're speaking too loud in a theater, people are not wrong for shushing you. If you eat with your left hand in an Arabic country, locals are not wrong for getting grossed out.
In those cases usually all it takes is a reminder for the offender to get the message. Here, unfortunately, toe steppers rarely respond to messages that the rules are different here with "Oh, sorry, I didn't realize." Nearly always they assume they can't possibly be wrong and respond with anger and "I've never met a ruder group of people!" And yet who is in the wrong? The group for being what it promises to be? Or people who cling to their assumptions and blame the group?
Joyce, April 22, 2013, here:
Stay and readů