Dawn Falbe

Hi everyone:



So after that heading you are probably wondering whether it's drugs or
alcohol I'm going to be referring too!!! Neither.



Here's the problem. I've written before about my controlling mother who
not only doesn't believe in homeschooling (knows nothing about it), but
doesn't think I can "do" it, says we are hurting our kids, won't read
anything about homeschooling, let alone unschooling, blah blah blah..



Well I have found myself everytime she comes over to the house parading
Zak in front of her and showing her what he can do. I bought a social
sciences book from E-Bay for grade 2 (whatever that is). Not only did it
turn out to be written in what looked liked the 70's but Zak answered
all the questions easily. So I bought this book out in front of her
yesterday and was "quizzing" Zak on what he knew. Naturally he (1) did
not want to be quizzed (2) I was interupting some other play of his for
this book stuff that he kept telling me was silly and he was busy.



I have noticed a pattern of this behavior from myself.. So who has
experience of this and is there hope for me overcoming this addiction to
prove to my mother that Zak is learning "something" and I'm not damaging
him.



Today the boys are happy and building tunnels and towers and generally
having a great time, without book quizzing or forcing them to read or
write about anything.



Your experiences, thoughts and comments would be greatly appreciated.



Dawn F

Tucson, AZ

(Looking for MAA Meeting) Mother Approval Anonymous!!!



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Betsy

**
I have noticed a pattern of this behavior from myself.. So who has
experience of this and is there hope for me overcoming this addiction to
prove to my mother that Zak is learning "something" and I'm not damaging
him.**

Hi, Dawn --

I want to be encouraging, but I don't really know what to say. I have
family members who are disapproving of homeschooling, but they keep
their comments mild with me. Perhaps my (well-earned) reputation as a
tantrum-throwing bitch helps restrain them? (I don't recommend the
tantrums, too demeaning, but a fierce reputation can have advantages. <eg>)

Do you feel free to cut down on the amount of time you spend with your
mom, or is that treated completely as her decision?

Betsy


PS On a side subject, I acquired a current 2nd grade "Social Studies
text" just for grins, and I have to say I find it very mockable. (I paid
25 cents for it.) Here's a sample of the shallow information contained
within it:

"Holidays are fun. They are also interesting. We have a reason for
celebrating each holiday. You know why we celebrate Thanksgiving. You
can learn why we celebrate Columbus Day, too.
You can find out about Columbus Day or any other holiday in the
library. A library is a place where you will find many books. Some
books tell about a holiday, a person, or any other idea. The librarian
can help you find books in the library.
What is the reason that we celebrate Columbus Day? We remember
Christopher Columbus on this day. You can find out more about him in
the library. The librarian will show you where to find books with
information. then you can learn more about Columbus."

Nancy Wooton

on 9/25/02 1:49 PM, Dawn Falbe at astrologerdawn@... wrote:

> Dawn F
>
> Tucson, AZ
>
> (Looking for MAA Meeting) Mother Approval Anonymous!!!
>

Well, there's Adult Children of Alcoholics (and other Dysfunctional
families) and CoDependents Anonymous... those pretty well cover it.

Nancy (who attends the former every week, going on two years)

Sharon Rudd

I think you should get your two-bits back, and go to
the library.

Sure do hope it was a reject text.

Sharon of the Swamp
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
> PS On a side subject, I acquired a current 2nd
> grade "Social Studies
> text" just for grins, and I have to say I find it
> very mockable. (I paid
> 25 cents for it.) Here's a sample of the shallow
> information contained
> within it:
>
> "Holidays are fun. They are also interesting. We
> have a reason for
> celebrating each holiday. You know why we celebrate
> Thanksgiving. You
> can learn why we celebrate Columbus Day, too.
> You can find out about Columbus Day or any other
> holiday in the
> library. A library is a place where you will find
> many books. Some
> books tell about a holiday, a person, or any other
> idea. The librarian
> can help you find books in the library.
> What is the reason that we celebrate Columbus
> Day? We remember
> Christopher Columbus on this day. You can find out
> more about him in
> the library. The librarian will show you where to
> find books with
> information. then you can learn more about
> Columbus."
>


__________________________________________________
Do you Yahoo!?
New DSL Internet Access from SBC & Yahoo!
http://sbc.yahoo.com

Betsy

**
I think you should get your two-bits back, and go to
the library.

Sure do hope it was a reject text.**

The volume I bought is stamped "discarded". However, it's from the
Houghton-Mifflin series that seems to be one of the main approved Social
Studies series in California.

I don't even want to imagine what the total dollars are spent on K-12
textbooks in California.

Betsy

[email protected]

Instead of trying to get the kids to perform, maybe you should just keep a
journal of the cool stuff, and send your mom copies from time to time. Or
put it on a webpage where she can look when she wants to. And the other
benefit would be you would have it someday to look back on.

Sandra

[email protected]

In a message dated 9/25/02 5:16:05 PM, ecsamhill@... writes:

<< On a side subject, I acquired a current 2nd grade "Social Studies
text" just for grins, and I have to say I find it very mockable. (I paid
25 cents for it.) Here's a sample of the shallow information contained
within it: >>

eeep

I had forgotten that sort of drivel.

-=- You can find out about Columbus Day or any other holiday in the
library. A library is a place where you will find many books. Some
books tell about a holiday, a person, or any other idea. The librarian
can help you find books in the library.-=-

I'm sure the descriptions of all the learned skills is extensive and the
experts who designed, published, sold, bought, and administered the delivery
of it are all self-satisfied.


Sandra

[email protected]

In a message dated 9/25/02 10:28:08 PM, ikonstitcher@... writes:

<< Well, there's Adult Children of Alcoholics (and other Dysfunctional
families) and CoDependents Anonymous... those pretty well cover it.

Nancy (who attends the former every week, going on two years) >>

I agree with Nancy!

I went to Adult Children of Alcoholics weekly or more from before Kirby was
born until after Marty could express that he didn't want to stay in the
nursery. Four years.

Changed my life hugely.

Sandra

Tia Leschke

Just catching up . . .

>
>
>
> I have noticed a pattern of this behavior from myself.. So who has
> experience of this and is there hope for me overcoming this addiction to
> prove to my mother that Zak is learning "something" and I'm not damaging
> him.

Maybe a similar kind of experience that I had with my ex would help.
I had always sworn that I would never do the "fighting in front of the
kids", nasty divorce
stuff. Then I ended up repeatedly becoming infuriated with him, usually in
front of the kids.
It got really ugly. He always seemed to be able to push my buttons
and get me fighting with him. I'm afraid it took a number of years to
finally figure out what
the main button was. While I had long stopped caring what he thought of me
as a person
(I knew he wasn't ever going think I was a good person, but I knew I was),
I had this
need for him to believe that I was a good mother. (I think that came from
my insecurities
about being a stay-at-home mother at a time when so many mothers were
entering the work force.)
When I finally realized that *nothing* I
did would change his beliefs on that subject (he had a strong need for me
*not* to be a good
mother) I was able to let go of it. After that, he could annoy me, but he
never was able to
get me really angry again. It really rotted his socks. <g>
Tia