Fwd: LJ | unschooling encourages us to let more of the world in! đ
Sandra Dodd
Happy Friday!
And if you've just joined us, welcome. :-)
I hope there's a gem or two in here this week that you'll find helpful on your unschooling journey.
Let's explore!
This week on the podcast ...
Unschooling Dads and Documentaries with Jeremy Stuart
Jeremy Stuart joined me this week for an engaging conversation about unschooling, documentaries, and life. Jeremy is an unschooling dad and video editor who also directed and co-produced the wonderful documentary film, Class Dismissed, released in 2015. Since then, it has been screened in more than 60 countries and translated into five languages. He's now in the home stretch of producing a new documentary, Self-Taught, which looks at the question, âWhat happens when they become adults?â
You can listen to the episode here, watch on YouTube, or read the transcript here.
Jeremy shared so many great insights that I thought it would be fun to create a quote collection this week! I'm curious, which is your favourite?
On surprises and trust:
"When I am really paying attention, and I am really listening to my daughter and what she is sayingâwhat she is putting forth as her interests or what she wants to doâand I step out of the way, I back off and just go, "Okay, fine. That sounds great." and then let her just run with it, amazing things happen.
And then it really always surprises me, I go, âWow, that really worked out well.â Why was I so hung up that somehow that was not going to work out? Because I think trust is such a huge part of this. I think it is the central piece, learning to really trust that, somehow or other, these kids that are unschooled, they are going to turn out fine, right? If you provide a nurturing environment, if you are supportive, if you can connect with them and not put up barriers and do not impose your own authority on them, "Well, this is how it should be," and just allow it to naturally unfold, incredible things happen."
On reigniting curiosity in parents:
"I really think our kids are our greatest teachers, and this whole lifestyle. If we are providing the opportunity for them to be free and to explore and to learn, then some of that has to come back at you. And it starts to break down those internal barriers that we've got about, âOh, well, I canât learn that, Iâm too old,â or whatever. It becomes, âOoo, that's interesting!â
And suddenly, that sparkâthat creative spark that I think we are all born with and that somehow gets crushed in the schooling system and by society in generalâis reignited! And part of this journey is that this spark is being constantly reignited. And so, that moment in the film that you mentioned really is a terrific moment where Rachel, itâs like she really understood, âWow, itâs not just about my daughters, itâs about me!â And this whole idea of let's learn and continue to grow together in the world. Itâs great."
On living as a full contact sport:
"Thereâs a road map through our life basically, if you choose to take that route. And if you choose to step outside of that, then thereâs no road map. So, youâre kind of winging it, and in fact, thatâs why the questions really start to come up. But to me, being in that place of not knowing is the most intimate place you can be. Because youâre so fully engaged with life. Because you donât know, you have to start questioning. âBut what about this? And what about that?â Thatâs living, as opposed to just saying, âOh, Iâm supposed to go to this. Oh, Iâm supposed to go do that. Oh, I guess Iâm going to do this now.â Youâre not rubbing up against life, youâre not crashing into things.
And so, I think that to me, thatâs the most exciting part of this lifestyle. Itâs just crashing into stuff all the time, figuring it out, and I donât know whatâs going on half the time. And thatâs okay. I feel alive by that. I feel engaged and enraptured with it. Because otherwise Iâm numb."
On the illusion of control:
"We think we have control, but we really have almost none. So again, coming back to trust. Trusting that, somehow or other, the universe provides what we need, if we are open to it, if we are receptive, if we are responsiveânot just for our kids, but for ourselves. Thatâs why I love the unschooling lifestyle so much, because we are constantly thrown into that whirlpool of, âWe donât really know whatâs going on. And wow, isn't life incredible?â Itâs so interesting. Because there is never a dull moment."
Advice to new unschooling dads:
"I would say, just be really open to the processes. Try and find that place of trust that somehow or other you can come home from work and the house is a mess and your kids have been laying around reading all day or something and you wonder, 'What have they really learned?' They have learned an amazing amount, actually. Just try to kind of re-tune the dial a little bit. Spend time to connect with them when you come home from work. Make sure you have time to connect and listen to what they have been up to and let that in. Be free of judgement because it's hard in the workplace, there is so much of that. Success-driven, 'get the job,' 'get the promotion,' and 'make the money,' and all of this, and all of that, is just being bombarded all the time. And to come home to this sort of free form, crazy, wild, unschooling thing can be really challenging.
I think the main message would be just to trust your children. Really trust your children and be there to support them in whatever way you possibly can. Learn from them; really allow that mirroring to happen. For me, my daughter is a mirror. When I look at her, she just mirrors stuff back to me, whether I want it or not."
On making your world bigger:
"I think as we go through this journey of life, things tend to get narrower and narrower, or they can. We are forced into these little funnels. To me, the challenge is to break that funnel down and actually get bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger and let more and more of the world in. Let more of the world in, not less. The more of the world you let in, the richer your life becomes. It's hard because we have all these messages. 'Oh, you're not supposed to do that,' or 'You're supposed to be doing this.' Break down those barriers and even include all the messages that say, 'You should be doing this.' Allow those messages in, then question them."
On navigating the unknown:
"That is what I love about unschooling; in a sense it forces you to do that [let more of the world in]. Because there is no road map, as I said. You are winging it sometimes, and learning to trust. Ultimately, the rewards are so much greater because, as you begin to go through this process, you see that things miraculously work out. You know, these kids turn out great! They are amazing human beings! How could that be? It's mind-blowing. âWhat do you mean you never went to school and now you are doing like a PhD in Biology? What? That makes no sense.â But it does make sense. When you really start to see. âOh yes, that does make sense!â Then, all of a sudden, it becomes easier to navigate that sense of unknowing or not knowingness."
What an amazing collection of insights!
And be sure to check out Jeremy's Kickstarter campaign for his new documentary, Self-Taught!
From the podcast archives ...
Unschooling Dads and Board Games with Jamie Maltman
Unschooling dads with passions! Many of the unschooling dads who've joined us on the podcast have shared their passions with us: documentaries, science, writing, games, music and more. Fascinating stuff!
So, this week I thought I'd share my conversation with Jamie Maltman. Not only do we dive into his passion for board games, he also shares some great suggestions for new board games that might spice up your family fun! I thought you might find that interesting as we approach the holidays. My family loves playing board and card games and I pick up a new one every year for us to play during the holidays. I've had one in mind for this year (Ticket to Ride ... shhhh, it's a surprise) and I just checked the transcriptâyup, he mentions it! :-)
Jamie also shared this great observation: "We used to travel a lot and one thing we thought about was finding curriculum or different things that would be in conjunction with the places that we were thinking about traveling to as a family. So, we had already been thinking about a customized learning style and my wife was definitely on board with that. But then, as we got into unschooling, that fell by the wayside because we see how we can just learn from everything. A trip across the street can be as much of a way to learn and have fun as going all the way across the world."
You can listen to the episode here, on YouTube, or read the full transcript here.
Have you discovered ...
My free library of talks and published magazine articles.
My first magazine article was published in the summer of 2004. Wow!
On my website I've collected quite a few of my articles, including ones published in Toronto Life magazine, The Natural Parent Magazine, Life Learning Magazine, Our Schools, Our Selves, and the peer-reviewed Journal of Unschooling and Alternative Learning.
Some articles have been translated into Spanish, and some of the talks now have audio versions. You'll find the links to those there too.
I hope you find something interesting in there that connects with where you are on your journey. :-)
This week in my world ...
As I mentioned in the podcast intro, right now life is pretty much all podcast, all the time. With some holiday prep thrown in.
Iâm getting the December 27th compilation episode ready right now, and Iâm happily writing tons of questions and recording calls for the January episodes in hopes of avoiding a stressful rush at the beginning of the year. Itâs looking good. :-)
Wishing you and your family a lovely weekend!
I hope you're finding my work helpful on your unschooling journey. Here are some of the many ways you can discover and support my unschooling workâbecause apparently I can't just focus on one thing! đ
livingjoyfully.ca | Podcast | Patreon | Summit | Facebook | Instagram
Unsubscribe | Update your profile | 9716 Wellington Rd 22, Erin, ON N0B 1T0