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In a message dated 4/29/02 8:17:05 AM, ddzimlew@... writes:

<< I know there has
to be some process for getting over long held ideas about parenting but
when the "they need structure, they have disorders, they'll only ever eat
paper clips" thing starts, my head wants to explode. >>

My first experience with this was years back. Someone (who still corresponds
with me all these years later) had come to AOL in early days (or Prodigy,
even, maybe) to say that her very serious problem was that her two children
were working at the same level, and her daughter (nine or so?) would like to
do three or four pages of her language arts book, but her son didn't even
really want to do one, and how could she make them both do the same amount
happily?

I sent what I thought was a really obvious and simple answer, even if she had
been a schoolteacher with other people's kids, and said "Let he do as many
pages as she wants to."

I got back the "Well YOU couldn't possibly understand, since YOU are not the
mother of TWINS."

So... these two kids come out the same hole on the same day and so the boy is
expected to keep up with his sister for life OR slow her down to his speed,
so that "the twins" can be (literally) on the same page??

"Why?"

Nobody had ever asked her "why" before.

She let them split out and never regretted it.

<<I guess everyone has to start somewhere. >>

True. I wish some of them didn't have to stay at that starting point for the
rest of their lives.

<<Are you really thinking of changing the intro to the list. My
suggestion... " If you say something unbelievably stupid we WILL attack
you and if you whine about it we will send someone to your house to beat
you up." >>

Well I wasn't thi...)

Sandra