Nelson and Kelly

I had something happen today at Sunday School that at one time may not have
bothered me, but after researching the lifestyle of unschooling it really
bothered me.



I volunteered in the 4 year olds class-very scheduled, structured, at one
point we all went outside to let the kids play and one of the children did
not want to go outside to play-I knew once she went outside she would enjoy
the fresh air and freedom to move around, I asked the child if she wanted to
stay inside and play, the teacher looked at me and said she has NO CHOICE-so
we went outside and she did have fun.

Then when we came inside they were given a choice of pictures to color, as
they were coloring they were told, no you need to color it more, no do not
tap your crayons to make circles, no you can't have the cut out pumpkins
because you will color on the table, no that is NOT the color to color
with-pumpkins are orange!,

I NEVER realized how much we as adults micromanage children's lives,
decisions, how we make them feel inferior in their choices, because we are
the adults and they do not know better.

Just being in this class, okay sit in a circle, listen, pick up your toys
right as you are getting into pretend play, color this way, go outside, come
inside now, made me realize how much I dislike over structured "learning"
environments. I have NEVER had an aha moment like the one I had today!

Thank you all for the information and encouragement you provide to us
newbies who are learning how to adjust to the unschooling LIFESTYLE!



God bless,

Kelly in FL



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saturnfire16

> I NEVER realized how much we as adults micromanage children's lives,
> decisions, how we make them feel inferior in their choices, because
we are
> the adults and they do not know better.
>
> Just being in this class, okay sit in a circle, listen, pick up your
toys
> right as you are getting into pretend play, color this way, go
outside, come
> inside now, made me realize how much I dislike over
structured "learning"
> environments. I have NEVER had an aha moment like the one I had
today!


I recently left a church for several reasons, but this was one of
them. And it sounds like my church was way more relaxed than yours!
But it was also a 2 and 3 year olds class. I'm now attending a
Messianic church where the children are welcome in the main service.
They play in the back or join in the singing or sit and listen as they
choose. I nursed my baby in the service, and I've never been one to
cover up, and no one batted an eyelash.

guideforthree

===
Then when we came inside they were given a choice of pictures to color,
as they were coloring they were told, no you need to color it more, no
do not tap your crayons to make circles, no you can't have the cut out
pumpkins because you will color on the table, no that is NOT the color
to color with-pumpkins are orange!
===

A few years ago, I taught kindergarten at the school my children
attended. From the very first week of school my oldest child had
trouble with his fourth grade teacher. After attempts to remedy the
situation with the teacher/my co-worker, I finally came to the
realization that her philosophy of education and mine were not
compatible, and my son was caught in the middle. I talked the
situation over with a friend of mine. She sent me a copy of the lyrics
for Harry Chapin's "Flowers are Red." I turned in my resignation the
next day. It is interesting to note that this particular friend was
unschooling her older daughter while her younger daughter was a student
in my class. Her younger daughter's last day of school was the day
before mine. She knew when she sent that e-mail what conclusion I would
come to.

Just as the song implies, I am still trying to undo the damage.

Tina (I posted the lyrics below for those who don't know the song)

Flowers are Red
by Harry Chapin

The little boy went first day of school
He got some crayons and started to draw
He put colors all over the paper
For colors was what he saw
And the teacher said.. What you doin' young man
I'm paintin' flowers he said
She said... It's not the time for art young man
And anyway flowers are green and red
There's a time for everything young man
And a way it should be done
You've got to show concern for everyone else
For you're not the only one

And she said...
Flowers are red young man
Green leaves are green
There's no need to see flowers any other way
Than they way they always have been seen

But the little boy said...
There are so many colors in the rainbow
So many colors in the morning sun
So many colors in the flower and I see every one

Well the teacher said.. You're sassy
There's ways that things should be
And you'll paint flowers the way they are
So repeat after me.....

And she said...
Flowers are red young man
Green leaves are green
There's no need to see flowers any other way
Than they way they always have been seen

But the little boy said...
There are so many colors in the rainbow
So many colors in the morning sun
So many colors in the flower and I see every one

The teacher put him in a corner
She said.. It's for your own good..
And you won't come out 'til you get it right
And are responding like you should
Well finally he got lonely
Frightened thoughts filled his head
And he went up to the teacher
And this is what he said.. and he said

Flowers are red, green leaves are green
There's no need to see flowers any other way
Than the way they always have been seen

Time went by like it always does
And they moved to another town
And the little boy went to another school
And this is what he found
The teacher there was smilin'
She said...Painting should be fun
And there are so many colors in a flower
So let's use every one

But that little boy painted flowers
In neat rows of green and red
And when the teacher asked him why
This is what he said.. and he said

Flowers are red, green leaves are green
There's no need to see flowers any other way
Than the way they always have been seen.

guideforthree

I just found this fabulous live performance of "Flower are Red" by
Harry Chapin on YouTube. This is my favorite version of this song so
far, and it is the first time I've heard Chapin's inspiration for the
song: "You're son marches to a different drummer, but don't worry
we'll have him marching with the rest of the band by the end of the
term."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=noVC5Jt2Gu8

Enjoy!

Tina

Jenny C

> Then when we came inside they were given a choice of pictures to
color,
> as they were coloring they were told, no you need to color it more, no
> do not tap your crayons to make circles, no you can't have the cut out
> pumpkins because you will color on the table, no that is NOT the color
> to color with-pumpkins are orange!
> ===
> Flowers are red, green leaves are green
> There's no need to see flowers any other way
> Than the way they always have been seen.


Pumpkins aren't always orange either, sometimes they are green or white,
or brownish or a mix of all of those.

Kids are so great at really seeing the world, adults often can't really
see the world outside of their boxes.

lyndaquincunx

Thanks Tina, that made me cry! :o) I was already in a teary frame of
mind having just watched Bridge to Terabitha with my girls. It breaks
my heart to think of children having the individuality squashed out of
them.

Lynda

--- In [email protected], "guideforthree"
<tinaboster@...> wrote:
><snip>lyrics
> for Harry Chapin's "Flowers are Red." I turned in my resignation the
> next day.

Verna

>
>
> I volunteered in the 4 year olds class-very scheduled, structured,
at one
> point we all went outside to let the kids play and one of the
children did
> not want to go outside to play-I knew once she went outside she
would enjoy
> the fresh air and freedom to move around, I asked the child if she
wanted to
> stay inside and play, the teacher looked at me and said she has NO
CHOICE-so
> we went outside and she did have fun.
>
same sort of thing happened to my son the other week at sunday
school. the helper actually did stay in with him but then they
wanted to know what they should do if it were to happen again- make
him go out? i kind of laughed cause they would honestly have to
carry him out screaming if they had tried. I just told them to that
i would always be available and he can come with me if he doesnt want
to go outside. i try to just let the teachers know i am around if
the kids dont want to be there anymore. My kids love to go to sunday
school or i would not take them. when we miss for some reason they
are always upset. I am sure one day some of them might change their
minds. In the meantime, i just try to be available, when they
descide they are done.

prism7513

no that is NOT the color to color
> with-pumpkins are orange!,

I made some paper-mache pumpkins with my 4 and 6 year old and my
daughter (the 6 year old) painted hers green. Why? "Because it's a
baby pumpkin!"

Luckily there were no teachers or kids to laugh at her creativity :)

Deb

Tanya Ziegler

> song: "You're son marches to a different drummer, but don't worry
> we'll have him marching with the rest of the band by the end of the
> term."

This makes me very sad. I wonder what my drum would sound like today
had I not gone to school and been stripped of my true self/identity.
I've been trying to find myself ever since.

Kelly Lovejoy

-----Original Message-----
From: Tanya Ziegler <tanyaz1@...>








> song: "You're son marches to a different drummer, but don't worry
> we'll have him marching with the rest of the band by the end of the
> term."

This makes me very sad. I wonder what my drum would sound like today
had I not gone to school and been stripped of my true self/identity.
I've been trying to find myself ever since.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-

If most folks go to school for 12 up to 22 years (pre-K, K, 1-12, college, grad school) and if the deschooling process is approximately one month for every year in school, is it any wonder that the self-help sections of the libraries and the local Barnes & Noble are PACKED with 30-40 year olds???

HUGE marching band, with former members all "searching" for themselves.



~Kelly













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