knowing kids, and being an expert
[email protected]
In a message dated 3/22/04 10:39:48 AM, unschooled52@... writes:
<< I just hate it that some people doubt us and only believe the
professionals. As far as I am concerned we are the professionals as far us our children
are concerned. >>
That truism always sounds good until you consider the parents whose
"professional" opinion is that their children need more discipline, that their children
are lazy and that their babies are trying to manipulate them by crying.
Some parents are NOT professionals about children. They're not even
respectable amateurs.
If parents knew all they needed to know just because their sperm moved to a
receptive egg or because they carried a baby to term, lists like this wouldn't
be needed at all. Child development studies wouldn't be needed.
So yes, as a "there, there" soothing moment telling someone "you know your
own child" can be good, but lots of people don't know their own children very
well at all.
I think maybe it's directly connectable to Howard Gardner's Multiple
Intelligences. Some people are not good at self-knowing (intrapersonal intelligence)
or at knowing others (interpersonal) and yet they have children too. Some are
QUITE good at it, totally facile and smooth with understanding their
children, with being empathetic and respectful, and it hasn't occurred to them that
some other parents have little natural ability in that area.
Sandra
<< I just hate it that some people doubt us and only believe the
professionals. As far as I am concerned we are the professionals as far us our children
are concerned. >>
That truism always sounds good until you consider the parents whose
"professional" opinion is that their children need more discipline, that their children
are lazy and that their babies are trying to manipulate them by crying.
Some parents are NOT professionals about children. They're not even
respectable amateurs.
If parents knew all they needed to know just because their sperm moved to a
receptive egg or because they carried a baby to term, lists like this wouldn't
be needed at all. Child development studies wouldn't be needed.
So yes, as a "there, there" soothing moment telling someone "you know your
own child" can be good, but lots of people don't know their own children very
well at all.
I think maybe it's directly connectable to Howard Gardner's Multiple
Intelligences. Some people are not good at self-knowing (intrapersonal intelligence)
or at knowing others (interpersonal) and yet they have children too. Some are
QUITE good at it, totally facile and smooth with understanding their
children, with being empathetic and respectful, and it hasn't occurred to them that
some other parents have little natural ability in that area.
Sandra
Kay Alina
Some parents are NOT professionals about children. They're not even
respectable amateurs.
You bring up a great point Sandra. I realized during the past week that I was biased and also had many preconceived notions about the parent devoted to homeschooling. I had presumed that they were intelligent, kind, devoted and understanding people. I found out last week that this is not always true. One mother on a homeschooling group is quite mentally ill and was hospitalized for a suicide attempt. I had strong feelings about this situation. Probably because my preconceived notions were being shattered and I wanted to hold onto my illusions. I feel my eggshell has cracked although I ended up pursuing a healthier network of people and found this site. All for the best. Thanks for the reality reminder.
Kay
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
respectable amateurs.
You bring up a great point Sandra. I realized during the past week that I was biased and also had many preconceived notions about the parent devoted to homeschooling. I had presumed that they were intelligent, kind, devoted and understanding people. I found out last week that this is not always true. One mother on a homeschooling group is quite mentally ill and was hospitalized for a suicide attempt. I had strong feelings about this situation. Probably because my preconceived notions were being shattered and I wanted to hold onto my illusions. I feel my eggshell has cracked although I ended up pursuing a healthier network of people and found this site. All for the best. Thanks for the reality reminder.
Kay
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 3/22/2004 4:58:26 PM Eastern Standard Time,
cen46624@... writes:
A person can be quite seriously mentally ill and still be intelligent,
kind and devoted. They can still love and cherish their kids and want
the best for them. They can still be generous and loving.<<<<<
The opposite is true as well. A person can be quite mentally sound and be
cruel and inhuman. She can shame and strike her kids and not really care what
happens to them.
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
cen46624@... writes:
A person can be quite seriously mentally ill and still be intelligent,
kind and devoted. They can still love and cherish their kids and want
the best for them. They can still be generous and loving.<<<<<
The opposite is true as well. A person can be quite mentally sound and be
cruel and inhuman. She can shame and strike her kids and not really care what
happens to them.
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Diane
A person can be quite seriously mentally ill and still be intelligent,
kind and devoted. They can still love and cherish their kids and want
the best for them. They can still be generous and loving.
:-) Diane
Kay Alina wrote:
kind and devoted. They can still love and cherish their kids and want
the best for them. They can still be generous and loving.
:-) Diane
Kay Alina wrote:
>Some parents are NOT professionals about children. They're not even
>respectable amateurs.
>
>You bring up a great point Sandra. I realized during the past week that I was biased and also had many preconceived notions about the parent devoted to homeschooling. I had presumed that they were intelligent, kind, devoted and understanding people. I found out last week that this is not always true. One mother on a homeschooling group is quite mentally ill and was hospitalized for a suicide attempt.
>
Jay Wood
SandraDodd@... wrote:
In a message dated 3/22/04 10:39:48 AM, unschooled52@... writes:
<< I just hate it that some people doubt us and only believe the
professionals. As far as I am concerned we are the professionals as far us our children
are concerned. >>
That truism always sounds good until you consider the parents whose
"professional" opinion is that their children need more discipline, that their children
are lazy and that their babies are trying to manipulate them by crying.
Some parents are NOT professionals about children. They're not even
respectable amateurs.
Sorry if I did not make my self clear, I was talking about AP parents. I am well aware of the the lack of connection that lots of parents have and it saddens me to see it.
Jay Wood
---------------------------------
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
In a message dated 3/22/04 10:39:48 AM, unschooled52@... writes:
<< I just hate it that some people doubt us and only believe the
professionals. As far as I am concerned we are the professionals as far us our children
are concerned. >>
That truism always sounds good until you consider the parents whose
"professional" opinion is that their children need more discipline, that their children
are lazy and that their babies are trying to manipulate them by crying.
Some parents are NOT professionals about children. They're not even
respectable amateurs.
Sorry if I did not make my self clear, I was talking about AP parents. I am well aware of the the lack of connection that lots of parents have and it saddens me to see it.
Jay Wood
---------------------------------
Yahoo! Messenger - Communicate instantly..."Ping" your friends today! Download Messenger Now
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]