censorship
Jane Van Benthusen
I have a friend that's an unschooler that censors her childs reading.
Today she said her 13 year old is only "allowed" to read childrens and teen
books - mainly when it comes to novels. I've never felt the need to censor
my boys reading. I'm not sure what she's trying to protect her from and
wasn't in the mood to debate it but now I can't stop thinking about it. One
of my boys does read a lot of very grown up stuff and seems fine with it. We
talk a lot about all kinds of things that he has read about. Do you censor
your kids reading? Why or why not? Do you think it's dangerous to censor?
Thanks, Jane :)
Today she said her 13 year old is only "allowed" to read childrens and teen
books - mainly when it comes to novels. I've never felt the need to censor
my boys reading. I'm not sure what she's trying to protect her from and
wasn't in the mood to debate it but now I can't stop thinking about it. One
of my boys does read a lot of very grown up stuff and seems fine with it. We
talk a lot about all kinds of things that he has read about. Do you censor
your kids reading? Why or why not? Do you think it's dangerous to censor?
Thanks, Jane :)
joylyn
I do not. I do sometimes suggest to Lexie she not read something for a
bit, like I've asked her not to read holocaust books (of which we have a
great deal, as it's a subject I'm interested in) and she's agreed. I
guess we try to have a relationship of trust, I trust her and she trusts
me and so when I say "I don't think this is a good idea, when you are
older we can read those" she trusts that.
Joylyn
Jane Van Benthusen wrote:
bit, like I've asked her not to read holocaust books (of which we have a
great deal, as it's a subject I'm interested in) and she's agreed. I
guess we try to have a relationship of trust, I trust her and she trusts
me and so when I say "I don't think this is a good idea, when you are
older we can read those" she trusts that.
Joylyn
Jane Van Benthusen wrote:
> I have a friend that's an unschooler that censors her childs reading.[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> Today she said her 13 year old is only "allowed" to read childrens and
> teen
> books - mainly when it comes to novels. I've never felt the need to censor
> my boys reading. I'm not sure what she's trying to protect her from and
> wasn't in the mood to debate it but now I can't stop thinking about
> it. One
> of my boys does read a lot of very grown up stuff and seems fine with
> it. We
> talk a lot about all kinds of things that he has read about. Do you censor
> your kids reading? Why or why not? Do you think it's dangerous to censor?
>
> Thanks, Jane :)
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
> * To visit your group on the web, go to:
> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/AlwaysLearning/
>
> * To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
> [email protected]
> <mailto:[email protected]?subject=Unsubscribe>
>
> * Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of
> Service <http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/>.
>
>
Jon and Rue Kream
Dagny's 11 and reads a LOT, and we do not censor what she reads. Just
as she chooses what television shows she wants to watch based on what's
interesting and comfortable for her, she chooses what she wants to read.
She will sometimes, if she's not sure about a book, ask me to read it
first to see if I think there's anything in it that would be disturbing
for her. I'll tell her a bit about parts I think she might not like, if
there are any. In the end, she makes her own decision. If she begins
it and finds she's not comfortable with it after all, she has no problem
with just not reading any further. I think a child who hadn't been free
to make her own choices would be more likely to plow through the book
without listening to her own reactions to it - just to grab that piece
of forbidden fruit.
What is your friend afraid of?
I think censoring is dangerous to the relationship between the parent
and child, and is also totally unnecessary. ~Rue
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
as she chooses what television shows she wants to watch based on what's
interesting and comfortable for her, she chooses what she wants to read.
She will sometimes, if she's not sure about a book, ask me to read it
first to see if I think there's anything in it that would be disturbing
for her. I'll tell her a bit about parts I think she might not like, if
there are any. In the end, she makes her own decision. If she begins
it and finds she's not comfortable with it after all, she has no problem
with just not reading any further. I think a child who hadn't been free
to make her own choices would be more likely to plow through the book
without listening to her own reactions to it - just to grab that piece
of forbidden fruit.
What is your friend afraid of?
I think censoring is dangerous to the relationship between the parent
and child, and is also totally unnecessary. ~Rue
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Jane Van Benthusen
Thanks Rue. I agree. My oldest has stopped reading a book many times and
said it was too much for him just like he turns the channel on the TV at
times.
Does anyone know of any articles I couls pass on to her about this issue?
Thanks Again, Jane
said it was too much for him just like he turns the channel on the TV at
times.
>I think censoring is dangerous to the relationship between the parentI couldn't agree more with that statement. I wish I had said more.
>and child, and is also totally unnecessary.
Does anyone know of any articles I couls pass on to her about this issue?
Thanks Again, Jane
----- Original Message -----
From: "Jon and Rue Kream" <skreams@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Monday, January 19, 2004 12:03 AM
Subject: RE: [AlwaysLearning] censorship
> Dagny's 11 and reads a LOT, and we do not censor what she reads. Just
> as she chooses what television shows she wants to watch based on what's
> interesting and comfortable for her, she chooses what she wants to read.
> She will sometimes, if she's not sure about a book, ask me to read it
> first to see if I think there's anything in it that would be disturbing
> for her. I'll tell her a bit about parts I think she might not like, if
> there are any. In the end, she makes her own decision. If she begins
> it and finds she's not comfortable with it after all, she has no problem
> with just not reading any further. I think a child who hadn't been free
> to make her own choices would be more likely to plow through the book
> without listening to her own reactions to it - just to grab that piece
> of forbidden fruit.
>
> What is your friend afraid of?
>
> I think censoring is dangerous to the relationship between the parent
> and child, and is also totally unnecessary. ~Rue
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
>
>
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
> To visit your group on the web, go to:
> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/AlwaysLearning/
>
> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
> [email protected]
>
> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to:
> http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
>
>
Fetteroll
on 1/19/04 12:13 AM, Jane Van Benthusen at jane@... wrote:
feel the same.
I think of it as helping her find the things she wants and avoid the things
she doesn't want. She's the best judge of what she's ready to handle.
Joyce
> Do you censorI wouldn't want my husband to censor what I read! I'm sure my daughter would
> your kids reading? Why or why not? Do you think it's dangerous to censor?
feel the same.
I think of it as helping her find the things she wants and avoid the things
she doesn't want. She's the best judge of what she's ready to handle.
Joyce
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/18/2004 9:14:32 PM Pacific Standard Time, jane@...
writes:
beforehand and read every book. What a complaete pain! She also had a verbal list
of what my 11 yo daughter was not allowed to 'discuss' with her 11 yo
daughter, completely failing to appreciate that girls need to talk to their own age
group about 'stuff' like periods etc etc. The friendship nearly ended over this
as Heather would be so anxious about what she could and could not say to her
friend.
Gawd knows what she was afraid of.
I used to try and joke about it by asking her to ask her daghter not to talk
to Heather about fashion and malls which I detest.
Personally I think the more you censor the more attractive the censored thing
becomes. You are also destroying trust between yourself and your child as
well as telling your child that they do not have the ability to decide what is
best for them. Hence adults who contsantly turn to 'experts' or peer groups to
make their minds up for them.
Shyrley
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
writes:
> have a friend that's an unschooler that censors her childs reading.I have a friend who censors too. This means she has to watch every video
> Today she said her 13 year old is only "allowed" to read childrens and teen
> books - mainly when it comes to novels. I've never felt the need to censor
> my boys reading. I'm not sure what she's trying to protect her from and
> wasn't in the mood to debate it but now I can't stop thinking about it. One
> of my boys does read a lot of very grown up stuff and seems fine with it. We
> talk a lot about all kinds of things that he has read about. Do you censor
> your kids reading? Why or why not? Do you think it's dangerous to censor?
>
> Thanks, Jane :)
>
beforehand and read every book. What a complaete pain! She also had a verbal list
of what my 11 yo daughter was not allowed to 'discuss' with her 11 yo
daughter, completely failing to appreciate that girls need to talk to their own age
group about 'stuff' like periods etc etc. The friendship nearly ended over this
as Heather would be so anxious about what she could and could not say to her
friend.
Gawd knows what she was afraid of.
I used to try and joke about it by asking her to ask her daghter not to talk
to Heather about fashion and malls which I detest.
Personally I think the more you censor the more attractive the censored thing
becomes. You are also destroying trust between yourself and your child as
well as telling your child that they do not have the ability to decide what is
best for them. Hence adults who contsantly turn to 'experts' or peer groups to
make their minds up for them.
Shyrley
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/18/2004 11:14:23 PM Central Standard Time,
jane@... writes:
Do you censor
your kids reading? Why or why not? Do you think it's dangerous to censor?
~~~
Not an answer to your question...but I saw a bumper sticker yesterday that
said, "Censorship Offends Me".
Tuck
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
jane@... writes:
Do you censor
your kids reading? Why or why not? Do you think it's dangerous to censor?
~~~
Not an answer to your question...but I saw a bumper sticker yesterday that
said, "Censorship Offends Me".
Tuck
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/19/2004 4:12:19 AM Central Standard Time,
sblingle@... writes:
want to.
I do find myself getting a little apprehensive on occasion when getting
together with other families if I don't know them very well and I am not sure what
level of life they are on, LOL. I just made that up cause I don't know how
else to say it, we talk about a lot of things here so I never know what will
come up that may be too adult for some kids. I think my kids are pretty good at
assessing any situation and adjusting their interactions as needed but
sometimes with older kids I worry my kids might assume too much, well, I mean they may
not always realize that we are living on a different level than mainstream
USA and they are not above the occassional colorful word.
LOL, now that I think about it I too have to stop and think now and then as I
am so used to talking to my own kids that I sometimes forget that not all
kids are as used to having in depth conversations with adults, this is probably
coming out all wrong so I hope ya'll can hear what I'm trying to say. I don't
mean it to sound high fallutin (Is that how you spell it) I liken it to the
gradual process we went through when we started listening to books on tape, as
our listening ability developed we were able to follow more complex books, I
think the same thing happens with the conversations we have with each other and
our families. A "What did you do in school today" conversation is far different
from discussing the problems inherent in compulsory education, a conversation
which we recently had. I think I will stop here to see if I am making sense
to anyone, I know what I mean but it may sound like gibberish to you, LOL.
Laura
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
sblingle@... writes:
> She also had a verbal listThat would be soooo hard, I don't know that I could manage that or would even
> of what my 11 yo daughter was not allowed to 'discuss' with her 11 yo
> daughter, completely failing to appreciate that girls need to talk to their
> own age
> group about 'stuff' like periods etc etc. The friendship nearly ended over
> this
> as Heather would be so anxious about what she could and could not say to her
>
> friend.
>
want to.
I do find myself getting a little apprehensive on occasion when getting
together with other families if I don't know them very well and I am not sure what
level of life they are on, LOL. I just made that up cause I don't know how
else to say it, we talk about a lot of things here so I never know what will
come up that may be too adult for some kids. I think my kids are pretty good at
assessing any situation and adjusting their interactions as needed but
sometimes with older kids I worry my kids might assume too much, well, I mean they may
not always realize that we are living on a different level than mainstream
USA and they are not above the occassional colorful word.
LOL, now that I think about it I too have to stop and think now and then as I
am so used to talking to my own kids that I sometimes forget that not all
kids are as used to having in depth conversations with adults, this is probably
coming out all wrong so I hope ya'll can hear what I'm trying to say. I don't
mean it to sound high fallutin (Is that how you spell it) I liken it to the
gradual process we went through when we started listening to books on tape, as
our listening ability developed we were able to follow more complex books, I
think the same thing happens with the conversations we have with each other and
our families. A "What did you do in school today" conversation is far different
from discussing the problems inherent in compulsory education, a conversation
which we recently had. I think I will stop here to see if I am making sense
to anyone, I know what I mean but it may sound like gibberish to you, LOL.
Laura
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/19/2004 1:03:52 AM Central Standard Time,
skreams@... writes:
set up it looks like the most efficient way to control what children are exposed
to en masse. It goes well hand in hand with age segregated schooling, we
don't have to know anything about any particular child at a certain age we can
just make judgments across the board as being "good" or "not good" for kids of a
certain age. And I'm sure if serves it's purpose for anyone not prepared to
question it's reliability. However, when we take the time to know our kids, to
talk and discuss whatever comes along with them then we are more in tune with
life and so are they.
As an aside, I drive my 16yro nuts listening to his music with him in the
car. I am always asking "what is he/she saying" and "what does he/she mean by
it?" Since we know each other so well I find him censoring me, LOLOL
Laura
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
skreams@... writes:
> What is your friend afraid of?I think censoring is something we are taught to do, the way our society is
>
> I think censoring is dangerous to the relationship between the parent
> and child, and is also totally unnecessary. ~Rue
>
set up it looks like the most efficient way to control what children are exposed
to en masse. It goes well hand in hand with age segregated schooling, we
don't have to know anything about any particular child at a certain age we can
just make judgments across the board as being "good" or "not good" for kids of a
certain age. And I'm sure if serves it's purpose for anyone not prepared to
question it's reliability. However, when we take the time to know our kids, to
talk and discuss whatever comes along with them then we are more in tune with
life and so are they.
As an aside, I drive my 16yro nuts listening to his music with him in the
car. I am always asking "what is he/she saying" and "what does he/she mean by
it?" Since we know each other so well I find him censoring me, LOLOL
Laura
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Wife2Vegman
--- Jane Van Benthusen <jane@...> wrote:
We used to censor heavily, then as we let go of the
boundaries and rules around here things have gotten so
much better.
Right now my 14yo is listening to Rammstein, I think
that is the group's name (everything is in German so I
don't have any idea what they are singing about). She
was reading To Kill a Mockingbird but decided she
didn't like it (broke my heart but I kept my mouth
shut).
My 12yo is reading Kenshin graphic novels right now
(and begging me to buy more!).
My 5yo refuses to watch anything that isn't animated,
and loves Pokemon, and he has me reading Magic Tree
House books to him that he found on our shelves the
other day.
Believe it or not, not one of them has become a porn
addict or junkie or taken up drinking and smoking
because of the rules being gone. Amazing!
=====
--Susan in VA
WifetoVegman
What is most important and valuable about the home as a base for children's growth into the world is not that it is a better school than the schools, but that it isn't a school at all. John Holt
__________________________________
Do you Yahoo!?
Yahoo! Hotjobs: Enter the "Signing Bonus" Sweepstakes
http://hotjobs.sweepstakes.yahoo.com/signingbonus
> Do you censorNope, we don't censor tv, movies, music or reading.
> your kids reading? Why or why not? Do you think it's
> dangerous to censor?
>
> Thanks, Jane :)
We used to censor heavily, then as we let go of the
boundaries and rules around here things have gotten so
much better.
Right now my 14yo is listening to Rammstein, I think
that is the group's name (everything is in German so I
don't have any idea what they are singing about). She
was reading To Kill a Mockingbird but decided she
didn't like it (broke my heart but I kept my mouth
shut).
My 12yo is reading Kenshin graphic novels right now
(and begging me to buy more!).
My 5yo refuses to watch anything that isn't animated,
and loves Pokemon, and he has me reading Magic Tree
House books to him that he found on our shelves the
other day.
Believe it or not, not one of them has become a porn
addict or junkie or taken up drinking and smoking
because of the rules being gone. Amazing!
=====
--Susan in VA
WifetoVegman
What is most important and valuable about the home as a base for children's growth into the world is not that it is a better school than the schools, but that it isn't a school at all. John Holt
__________________________________
Do you Yahoo!?
Yahoo! Hotjobs: Enter the "Signing Bonus" Sweepstakes
http://hotjobs.sweepstakes.yahoo.com/signingbonus
[email protected]
I would never censor my child's reading. When my oldest was little, before I
was an unschooler, I use to read most of the books she read so that we could
discuss them. I tend to enjoy reading childrens literature so this was just
something I naturally did. With five children, 3 of whom read a lot, this just
wouldn't be practical.
I was just discussing this question with Emily (who is reading over my
shoulder), and she was rather shocked. For one thing, she says, most of the books
in the teen section at our library are watered down "pop" stuff. *Note* she
enjoys these a lot, but she said she felt that someone's reading ability could
be stifled if they weren't allowed to read novels from the adult section. She
also noted that as far as things like explicit sex and violence (which I
assume is what the censoring mother is worried about?) go, the books in the teen
section are not censored by the librarians. Books go into the teen section
because someone feels that the books will particularly appeal to teens. You will
find plenty of sex and violence in these books.
IMHO I think that it's more important that children are comfortable talking
with their parents about anything. Then censoring doesn't seem to be much of
an issue. I wonder if some parents think there is a *magic* age at which it's
OK for children to read whatever they want. This seems rather humorous to me.
I'm imagining an 18yo running to the adult section of the library and
pulling down lots of books to check out hoping to find out what secrets are in
them.<g>
--Jacqueline
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
was an unschooler, I use to read most of the books she read so that we could
discuss them. I tend to enjoy reading childrens literature so this was just
something I naturally did. With five children, 3 of whom read a lot, this just
wouldn't be practical.
I was just discussing this question with Emily (who is reading over my
shoulder), and she was rather shocked. For one thing, she says, most of the books
in the teen section at our library are watered down "pop" stuff. *Note* she
enjoys these a lot, but she said she felt that someone's reading ability could
be stifled if they weren't allowed to read novels from the adult section. She
also noted that as far as things like explicit sex and violence (which I
assume is what the censoring mother is worried about?) go, the books in the teen
section are not censored by the librarians. Books go into the teen section
because someone feels that the books will particularly appeal to teens. You will
find plenty of sex and violence in these books.
IMHO I think that it's more important that children are comfortable talking
with their parents about anything. Then censoring doesn't seem to be much of
an issue. I wonder if some parents think there is a *magic* age at which it's
OK for children to read whatever they want. This seems rather humorous to me.
I'm imagining an 18yo running to the adult section of the library and
pulling down lots of books to check out hoping to find out what secrets are in
them.<g>
--Jacqueline
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/19/2004 6:43:15 AM Pacific Standard Time,
wifetovegman2002@... writes:
would become drug taking swearing porn addicts if they even associated with my
uncensored kids!
Despite my lack of rigid control my kids can be pleasant and polite and will
often censor themselves. (They do swear in temper however but you can't have
everything!)
They've played GTA:Vice City and haven't wanted to go out and run people over
either.
Personally I think that the more control you try and execrcise, the more it
will backfire when they are finally free. A controlled girl I know has been
overheard saying that she will read bad things, kiss loads of boys and go wild
when she reaches 18. Maybe she wont but she obviously resents the parental
strictures and while she is loving that is a line of bricks in any potential wall
between her and her parents. I'm sure they would be mortified if they realised
this.
Hows the weather over there in VA? Still numbingly cold?
Shyrley
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
wifetovegman2002@... writes:
> Nope, we don't censor tv, movies, music or reading.Heh. That is so true. Number of people in VA thought that somehow their kids
>
> We used to censor heavily, then as we let go of the
> boundaries and rules around here things have gotten so
> much better.
>
> Believe it or not, not one of them has become a porn
> addict or junkie or taken up drinking and smoking
> because of the rules being gone. Amazing!
>
>
>
> =====
> --Susan in VA
>
would become drug taking swearing porn addicts if they even associated with my
uncensored kids!
Despite my lack of rigid control my kids can be pleasant and polite and will
often censor themselves. (They do swear in temper however but you can't have
everything!)
They've played GTA:Vice City and haven't wanted to go out and run people over
either.
Personally I think that the more control you try and execrcise, the more it
will backfire when they are finally free. A controlled girl I know has been
overheard saying that she will read bad things, kiss loads of boys and go wild
when she reaches 18. Maybe she wont but she obviously resents the parental
strictures and while she is loving that is a line of bricks in any potential wall
between her and her parents. I'm sure they would be mortified if they realised
this.
Hows the weather over there in VA? Still numbingly cold?
Shyrley
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Norma
--- In [email protected], Wife2Vegman
<wifetovegman2002@y...> wrote:
the "adults only" videos and DVDs, because she works at the library
and the librarians trust her, know that I support her in her
choices. And, of course, she can read any book that can be found,
locally as well as through inter-library loan.
She recently rejected Eragon, couldn't finish it, said it was boring,
too much a male's point of view, but loves Melanie Rawn and is
writing her own fantasy novel, from more of a woman's point of view.
Favorite novels she read this past year include The Cider House Rules
and Les Miserables, among many others.
Favorite music groups include many international groups, in Russian,
Japanese, Italian and Finnish. And then she loves Josh Groban, too,
plays the songs he sings on the piano and is choreographing a skating
program to one of his songs for her next exhibition. She likes some
rap and some ghetto music, but not all. And she likes jazz, too, is
buying tickets to a jazz concert for her boy/friend's birthday next
weekend. And he is composing a piece for her to skate to for the
upcoming exhibition, too.
No censorship here at all.
Norma
<wifetovegman2002@y...> wrote:
> Nope, we don't censor tv, movies, music or reading.My daughter has full access to everything in the library, even
> Right now my 14yo is listening to Rammstein, I think
> that is the group's name (everything is in German so I
> don't have any idea what they are singing about). She
> was reading To Kill a Mockingbird but decided she
> didn't like it (broke my heart but I kept my mouth
> shut).
the "adults only" videos and DVDs, because she works at the library
and the librarians trust her, know that I support her in her
choices. And, of course, she can read any book that can be found,
locally as well as through inter-library loan.
She recently rejected Eragon, couldn't finish it, said it was boring,
too much a male's point of view, but loves Melanie Rawn and is
writing her own fantasy novel, from more of a woman's point of view.
Favorite novels she read this past year include The Cider House Rules
and Les Miserables, among many others.
Favorite music groups include many international groups, in Russian,
Japanese, Italian and Finnish. And then she loves Josh Groban, too,
plays the songs he sings on the piano and is choreographing a skating
program to one of his songs for her next exhibition. She likes some
rap and some ghetto music, but not all. And she likes jazz, too, is
buying tickets to a jazz concert for her boy/friend's birthday next
weekend. And he is composing a piece for her to skate to for the
upcoming exhibition, too.
No censorship here at all.
Norma
Wife2Vegman
--- sblingle@... wrote:
Run, and he has yet to repeat some of Homer's more
colorful phrases. (Although he did say, sighing,
"Christmas is Hell..." on the 26th! LOL!)
around and get themselves into situations where they
really don't want to be, but then can't call their
parents for fear they will be in trouble.
on the deck at all. It is comical to watch them slip
and slide across though.
Sold your house here yet?
=====
--Susan in VA
WifetoVegman
What is most important and valuable about the home as a base for children's growth into the world is not that it is a better school than the schools, but that it isn't a school at all. John Holt
__________________________________
Do you Yahoo!?
Yahoo! Hotjobs: Enter the "Signing Bonus" Sweepstakes
http://hotjobs.sweepstakes.yahoo.com/signingbonus
> They've played GTA:Vice City and haven't wanted toAaron's favorite game right now is Simpsons Hit and
> go out and run people over
> either.
Run, and he has yet to repeat some of Homer's more
colorful phrases. (Although he did say, sighing,
"Christmas is Hell..." on the 26th! LOL!)
> Personally I think that the more control you try andYep, and sometimes they do it even sooner, but sneak
> execrcise, the more it
> will backfire when they are finally free. A
> controlled girl I know has been
> overheard saying that she will read bad things, kiss
> loads of boys and go wild
> when she reaches 18. Maybe she wont but she
> obviously resents the parental
> strictures and while she is loving that is a line of
> bricks in any potential wall
> between her and her parents. I'm sure they would be
> mortified if they realised
> this.
around and get themselves into situations where they
really don't want to be, but then can't call their
parents for fear they will be in trouble.
> Hows the weather over there in VA? Still numbinglyYep, still cold. My little puppies don't like the ice
> cold?
>
> Shyrley
on the deck at all. It is comical to watch them slip
and slide across though.
Sold your house here yet?
=====
--Susan in VA
WifetoVegman
What is most important and valuable about the home as a base for children's growth into the world is not that it is a better school than the schools, but that it isn't a school at all. John Holt
__________________________________
Do you Yahoo!?
Yahoo! Hotjobs: Enter the "Signing Bonus" Sweepstakes
http://hotjobs.sweepstakes.yahoo.com/signingbonus
Fetteroll
on 1/19/04 9:42 AM, Wife2Vegman at wifetovegman2002@... wrote:
Joyce
> My 12yo is reading Kenshin graphic novels right nowAnd the 3rd doesn't come out until March!
> (and begging me to buy more!).
Joyce
Ren
"Personally I think the more you censor the more attractive the censored thing
becomes. You are also destroying trust between yourself and your child as
well as telling your child that they do not have the ability to decide what is
best for them."
I agree wholeheartedly!
And welcome back Shyrley!!! I'm assuming you're in England now? Hows life?
Ren
"I never teach my pupils; I only attempt to provide the conditions in which they can learn."
Albert Einstein
becomes. You are also destroying trust between yourself and your child as
well as telling your child that they do not have the ability to decide what is
best for them."
I agree wholeheartedly!
And welcome back Shyrley!!! I'm assuming you're in England now? Hows life?
Ren
"I never teach my pupils; I only attempt to provide the conditions in which they can learn."
Albert Einstein
[email protected]
-=-She also had a verbal list
of what my 11 yo daughter was not allowed to 'discuss' with her 11 yo
daughter, completely failing to appreciate that girls need to talk to their
own age
group about 'stuff' like periods etc etc.=\=
-----------------
Holly has a friend who has her own internal list of things she doesn't want
to hear about. Holly has discovered some of the things in a sad kind of
"you're getting cold" game where her friend will look away pointedly and start
humming. Harry Potter causes the loudest humming. Holidays (Christmas, Easter and
Halloween) earn humming too. The girl is Christian and has added her own
couple of layers of safety to her family's kind of Christianity.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
of what my 11 yo daughter was not allowed to 'discuss' with her 11 yo
daughter, completely failing to appreciate that girls need to talk to their
own age
group about 'stuff' like periods etc etc.=\=
-----------------
Holly has a friend who has her own internal list of things she doesn't want
to hear about. Holly has discovered some of the things in a sad kind of
"you're getting cold" game where her friend will look away pointedly and start
humming. Harry Potter causes the loudest humming. Holidays (Christmas, Easter and
Halloween) earn humming too. The girl is Christian and has added her own
couple of layers of safety to her family's kind of Christianity.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/19/2004 12:20:10 PM Central Standard Time,
SandraDodd@... writes:
Mom had me terrified of boys when I was a kid, (I think mostly I was just
terrified of her and not the boys) I would get so worried when boys would some over
to play at my friends house and this was when we were just kids. Kind of
ironic that I grew up and had 6 boys.
Laura
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
SandraDodd@... writes:
> Holly has a friend who has her own internal list of things she doesn't wantDo you think she is just afraid since she knows her family disapproves? My
>
> to hear about.
Mom had me terrified of boys when I was a kid, (I think mostly I was just
terrified of her and not the boys) I would get so worried when boys would some over
to play at my friends house and this was when we were just kids. Kind of
ironic that I grew up and had 6 boys.
Laura
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
Jane,
This is just my opinion, and I do not expect people to change their minds to
my way of thinking. But since you asked;)
I do censor what my children read, to an extent. Here is why. I do this for
the same reasons that I censor what they watch. I do not allow them to watch
movies where people are having sex, or running around naked.
My daughters are 11 and 14.
I watched Matrix Reloaded, which they wanted to see. There was one scene
Where Keanu and the woman were having sex. They can't watch it. I just think that
(my opinion only) those types of things are inappropriate for my daughters. I
love horror movies. They are my favorite, but I will not allow them to watch
most of them because of the sex. The same thing goes for books.
My favorite books are by Stephen King and Anne Rice. There are sex "scenes"
in books as well. Romance novels (like from Harlequin) have parts that are
pretty much porn. They do not need that kind of information at their ages, in my
opinion.
I do not just say "NO!" I read the entire book, or watch the entire movie,
first. Then I make an informed decision.
At their ages, I no longer worry about the violence in movies. They have been
raised away from such stuff as much as possible, so that is not a factor for
my daughters. They know it isn't real, they know it isn't okay, they can watch
it. So far, there have only been two movies, without sex, that I have not let
them watch, and both had explicit pictures of murdered children that I found
very disturbing. One was a Jack Nicholson movie, and the other was a
documentary (2 part), Paradise lost, about a true case.
My sister, though, puts no such limits on my nephew (9 years) about even
violence, and he has watched Matrix Reloaded. So every parent is different I guess.
Hope this helps,
Shannon
In a message dated 1/19/2004 7:31:17 AM Eastern Standard Time,
[email protected] writes:
Subject: censorship
I have a friend that's an unschooler that censors her childs reading.
Today she said her 13 year old is only "allowed" to read childrens and teen
books - mainly when it comes to novels. I've never felt the need to censor
my boys reading. I'm not sure what she's trying to protect her from and
wasn't in the mood to debate it but now I can't stop thinking about it. One
of my boys does read a lot of very grown up stuff and seems fine with it. We
talk a lot about all kinds of things that he has read about. Do you censor
your kids reading? Why or why not? Do you think it's dangerous to censor?
Thanks, Jane :)
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
This is just my opinion, and I do not expect people to change their minds to
my way of thinking. But since you asked;)
I do censor what my children read, to an extent. Here is why. I do this for
the same reasons that I censor what they watch. I do not allow them to watch
movies where people are having sex, or running around naked.
My daughters are 11 and 14.
I watched Matrix Reloaded, which they wanted to see. There was one scene
Where Keanu and the woman were having sex. They can't watch it. I just think that
(my opinion only) those types of things are inappropriate for my daughters. I
love horror movies. They are my favorite, but I will not allow them to watch
most of them because of the sex. The same thing goes for books.
My favorite books are by Stephen King and Anne Rice. There are sex "scenes"
in books as well. Romance novels (like from Harlequin) have parts that are
pretty much porn. They do not need that kind of information at their ages, in my
opinion.
I do not just say "NO!" I read the entire book, or watch the entire movie,
first. Then I make an informed decision.
At their ages, I no longer worry about the violence in movies. They have been
raised away from such stuff as much as possible, so that is not a factor for
my daughters. They know it isn't real, they know it isn't okay, they can watch
it. So far, there have only been two movies, without sex, that I have not let
them watch, and both had explicit pictures of murdered children that I found
very disturbing. One was a Jack Nicholson movie, and the other was a
documentary (2 part), Paradise lost, about a true case.
My sister, though, puts no such limits on my nephew (9 years) about even
violence, and he has watched Matrix Reloaded. So every parent is different I guess.
Hope this helps,
Shannon
In a message dated 1/19/2004 7:31:17 AM Eastern Standard Time,
[email protected] writes:
Subject: censorship
I have a friend that's an unschooler that censors her childs reading.
Today she said her 13 year old is only "allowed" to read childrens and teen
books - mainly when it comes to novels. I've never felt the need to censor
my boys reading. I'm not sure what she's trying to protect her from and
wasn't in the mood to debate it but now I can't stop thinking about it. One
of my boys does read a lot of very grown up stuff and seems fine with it. We
talk a lot about all kinds of things that he has read about. Do you censor
your kids reading? Why or why not? Do you think it's dangerous to censor?
Thanks, Jane :)
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/19/2004 11:44:44 AM Mountain Standard Time,
BonKnit@... writes:
-=-Do you think she is just afraid since she knows her family disapproves-=-
No, she thinks God disapproves her hearing things that will tempt her not to
be pure of thought. Her mom and brothers aren't nearly so uptight.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
BonKnit@... writes:
-=-Do you think she is just afraid since she knows her family disapproves-=-
No, she thinks God disapproves her hearing things that will tempt her not to
be pure of thought. Her mom and brothers aren't nearly so uptight.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
**Today she said her 13 year old is only "allowed" to read childrens and teen
books - mainly when it comes to novels.**
Stated that way, it's a rule that I would definitely never put onto *my* kids
- "teen" books as a genre being just chock full of angst and despair and all
the bad sides of life. If I were at all inclined to make a rule about books
that way I personally would be saying no to teen books and yes to adult books
just to up the odds of reading something more pleasant. :)
My kids ask me for suggestions and ask my opinion. Sometimes I've told them I
think they should wait to read something, because I know that for that child
at that time that particular book or theme would be too disturbing, instead of
thought provoking.
Deborah in IL
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
books - mainly when it comes to novels.**
Stated that way, it's a rule that I would definitely never put onto *my* kids
- "teen" books as a genre being just chock full of angst and despair and all
the bad sides of life. If I were at all inclined to make a rule about books
that way I personally would be saying no to teen books and yes to adult books
just to up the odds of reading something more pleasant. :)
My kids ask me for suggestions and ask my opinion. Sometimes I've told them I
think they should wait to read something, because I know that for that child
at that time that particular book or theme would be too disturbing, instead of
thought provoking.
Deborah in IL
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/19/2004 11:44:59 AM Mountain Standard Time,
slb725dragon@... writes:
-=-My sister, though, puts no such limits on my nephew (9 years) about even
violence, and he has watched Matrix Reloaded. So every parent is different I
guess.-=-
I don't think every parent is different. That would suggest that all of the
possible range of options is equally valuable and workable.
If the question is about cause and effect, it will help all those reading for
people to tell what they hope to gain from their decisions about what to
allow. Discussing assumptions can be helpful too.
When I was growing up (public school in the '60s) some of my friends had been
told NOTHING about sexuality. Starting their periods was a surprise to
them. They had no idea what to expect from boys. Some "got in trouble" (and it
was trouble even if they didn't get pregnant, if they no idea what all that
could lead to legally, emotionally, physically).
Today's modern version of that is abstinence, and 'just say no." No to
EVERYthing? "Just" say no with no information about what they're saying no to?
I'm rambling, but I think there are realities beyond just declaring parents
are all different. Which kinds of parenting will help unschooling work best?
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
slb725dragon@... writes:
-=-My sister, though, puts no such limits on my nephew (9 years) about even
violence, and he has watched Matrix Reloaded. So every parent is different I
guess.-=-
I don't think every parent is different. That would suggest that all of the
possible range of options is equally valuable and workable.
If the question is about cause and effect, it will help all those reading for
people to tell what they hope to gain from their decisions about what to
allow. Discussing assumptions can be helpful too.
When I was growing up (public school in the '60s) some of my friends had been
told NOTHING about sexuality. Starting their periods was a surprise to
them. They had no idea what to expect from boys. Some "got in trouble" (and it
was trouble even if they didn't get pregnant, if they no idea what all that
could lead to legally, emotionally, physically).
Today's modern version of that is abstinence, and 'just say no." No to
EVERYthing? "Just" say no with no information about what they're saying no to?
I'm rambling, but I think there are realities beyond just declaring parents
are all different. Which kinds of parenting will help unschooling work best?
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
>>My sister, though, puts no such limits on my nephew (9 years) about evenviolence, and he has watched Matrix Reloaded. So every parent is different I
guess.<<
We went to see Matrix Reloaded. My boys are 6 and 9. We saw the first one
and really liked it. My boys liked the action in the second one but on the
whole thought is was a very confusing movie, me too. LOL. As for the sex scene
they really didn't think much of it. My youngest said it was too boring and
it was a good time for a potty break. They both love action movies.
For the most part they are very good at censoring themselves. They know what
they do and do not like. Sometimes if I know a movie might have a scary part
I will tell them so they are prepared ahead of time. My oldest hates scary
movies, he is nine. He will choose to not watch or when it starts to get scary
he will leave the room for a few minutes. They think of sex scenes as
boring. It isn't what they want to watch and will generally go play with LEGOs or
something, it has no interest for them. Now when the action comes back on they
want to watch.
They also don't like a lot of violence that is "real" looking. They loved
LOTR. Again thought some of the slower non-action parts were a little boring,
especially my youngest, he is six. They didn't like The Patriot. To them it
was too real and too bloody. They left the room and played on their computers
during that one.
They are good at censoring for themselves. And I am sure their tastes will
change over the years.
Pam G
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
**She also had a verbal list of what my 11 yo daughter was not allowed to
'discuss' with her 11 yo
daughter, completely failing to appreciate that girls need to talk to their
own age group about 'stuff' like periods etc etc.**
I recently met a mom who was trying to find books about menstruation that
wouldn't mention tampons or in any way suggest girls might use them. She was
considering gluing the pages showing tampon insertion together in the American
Girls "Care and Keeping of Me" book because she otherwise likes that book. Blew
me away, to her it went right along with that all natural lifestyle she's
chasing after.
Deborah in IL
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
'discuss' with her 11 yo
daughter, completely failing to appreciate that girls need to talk to their
own age group about 'stuff' like periods etc etc.**
I recently met a mom who was trying to find books about menstruation that
wouldn't mention tampons or in any way suggest girls might use them. She was
considering gluing the pages showing tampon insertion together in the American
Girls "Care and Keeping of Me" book because she otherwise likes that book. Blew
me away, to her it went right along with that all natural lifestyle she's
chasing after.
Deborah in IL
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Wife2Vegman
--- Fetteroll <fetteroll@...> wrote:
Borders! LOL!
According to their database, though, at the store,
Kenshin #3 will be released on February 1.
I hope so!
=====
--Susan in VA
WifetoVegman
What is most important and valuable about the home as a base for children's growth into the world is not that it is a better school than the schools, but that it isn't a school at all. John Holt
__________________________________
Do you Yahoo!?
Yahoo! Hotjobs: Enter the "Signing Bonus" Sweepstakes
http://hotjobs.sweepstakes.yahoo.com/signingbonus
> on 1/19/04 9:42 AM, Wife2Vegman atMan, I wish I had gotten this e-mail before we went to
> wifetovegman2002@... wrote:
>
> > My 12yo is reading Kenshin graphic novels right
> now
> > (and begging me to buy more!).
>
> And the 3rd doesn't come out until March!
>
> Joyce
>
>
Borders! LOL!
According to their database, though, at the store,
Kenshin #3 will be released on February 1.
I hope so!
=====
--Susan in VA
WifetoVegman
What is most important and valuable about the home as a base for children's growth into the world is not that it is a better school than the schools, but that it isn't a school at all. John Holt
__________________________________
Do you Yahoo!?
Yahoo! Hotjobs: Enter the "Signing Bonus" Sweepstakes
http://hotjobs.sweepstakes.yahoo.com/signingbonus
slb725dragon
I see what you are saying Sandra. Maybe I should have said (something
like) other parents have different feelings about these types of
things. I hold to my feelings, and they hold to theirs.
My 11 year old, by the way, is reading Buffy the Vampyre Slayer, Vol.
1. It is geared towards older teens/adults I guess.I read it first.
She also watched the series on TV, except for the episodes with the
sex scenes. She likes Harry Potter, and a couple of other series of
books for her age about wizards and such.
I noticed that people were giving examples of what their children
were reading, so I thought that I would as well.
My 14 year old likes the Dear America series, My America Series, and
anything she can find having to do with horses.
I have not told them what they can or cannot talk to their friends
about. They need to be able to discuss things with them. I also talk
with them about such issues as violence, sex, things we hear about on
the news, and many other things.
Shannon
like) other parents have different feelings about these types of
things. I hold to my feelings, and they hold to theirs.
My 11 year old, by the way, is reading Buffy the Vampyre Slayer, Vol.
1. It is geared towards older teens/adults I guess.I read it first.
She also watched the series on TV, except for the episodes with the
sex scenes. She likes Harry Potter, and a couple of other series of
books for her age about wizards and such.
I noticed that people were giving examples of what their children
were reading, so I thought that I would as well.
My 14 year old likes the Dear America series, My America Series, and
anything she can find having to do with horses.
I have not told them what they can or cannot talk to their friends
about. They need to be able to discuss things with them. I also talk
with them about such issues as violence, sex, things we hear about on
the news, and many other things.
Shannon
--- In [email protected], SandraDodd@a... wrote:
> In a message dated 1/19/2004 11:44:59 AM Mountain Standard Time,
> slb725dragon@a... writes:
> -=-My sister, though, puts no such limits on my nephew (9 years)
about even
> violence, and he has watched Matrix Reloaded. So every parent is
different I
> guess.-=-
>
>
> I don't think every parent is different. That would suggest that
all of the
> possible range of options is equally valuable and workable.
>
> If the question is about cause and effect, it will help all those
reading for
> people to tell what they hope to gain from their decisions about
what to
> allow. Discussing assumptions can be helpful too.
>
> When I was growing up (public school in the '60s) some of my
friends had been
> told NOTHING about sexuality. Starting their periods was a
surprise to
> them. They had no idea what to expect from boys. Some "got in
trouble" (and it
> was trouble even if they didn't get pregnant, if they no idea what
all that
> could lead to legally, emotionally, physically).
>
> Today's modern version of that is abstinence, and 'just say no."
No to
> EVERYthing? "Just" say no with no information about what they're
saying no to?
>
> I'm rambling, but I think there are realities beyond just declaring
parents
> are all different. Which kinds of parenting will help unschooling
work best?
>
> Sandra
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/19/2004 12:23:27 PM Mountain Standard Time,
DACunefare@... writes:
-=-If I were at all inclined to make a rule about books
that way I personally would be saying no to teen books and yes to adult books
just to up the odds of reading something more pleasant. :) -=-
Good point! <g>
Lots of teen books are about adults being stupid and irritating, and teens
needing to depend on their own cleverness to overcome being practically
abandoned in the world of school.
High school fantasy books are read by midschool/jr high kids. Midschool
fantasy is read by elementary kids. <g> Same way the kids on commercials are
often a few years older than the target audience, because they want to identify
with older kids.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
DACunefare@... writes:
-=-If I were at all inclined to make a rule about books
that way I personally would be saying no to teen books and yes to adult books
just to up the odds of reading something more pleasant. :) -=-
Good point! <g>
Lots of teen books are about adults being stupid and irritating, and teens
needing to depend on their own cleverness to overcome being practically
abandoned in the world of school.
High school fantasy books are read by midschool/jr high kids. Midschool
fantasy is read by elementary kids. <g> Same way the kids on commercials are
often a few years older than the target audience, because they want to identify
with older kids.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Wife2Vegman
--- DACunefare@... wrote:
My 12yo is quite supersensitive to anything scarey,
anxiety producing, stressful, remotely suspenseful,
etc. mostly due to his inability to process what he is
seeing and hearing, and he has no ability to predict
what will happen in a situation that is not familiar,
not even in situations that are similar to others he
has experienced.
That is just Andrew, and it is ok. Reading Anne O.'s
essay really helped me see that, and be ok with who
Andrew is. ANYWAY...I am digressing a bit...
But it caused me problems because before I had always
censored what he watched, never even gave him the
option, knowing that he had this inability.
Once we let go of the rules, though, I didn't realize
he might still want me to preview things for him. It
seemed so controlling to me. One day I popped
Gremlins into the dvd for the 5yo and I to watch, and
didn't even think that it might be too much for the
12yo, but ever since then he has nightmares and can't
go to bed alone.
He felt betrayed by me. It has happened several times
over the past 6 months or so, before I realized he
really did want me to preview things and tell him what
to expect so he could decide. I would bring home
movies or netflix would arrive, and you could see the
anxiety in his eyes.
The pressure to watch things he never before would
even have been allowed to watch is there as well, from
siblings, cousins, friends, even Dad, until I finally
explained to him it was not good to push him in either
way.
So I have two who are relishing their new freedom, and
one who is scared to death of it. He doesn't feel
safe any more. He never knows if he walks into the tv
room if someone will be watching something that will
freak him out.
Any thoughts about this? Some way to find a balance?
=====
--Susan in VA
WifetoVegman
What is most important and valuable about the home as a base for children's growth into the world is not that it is a better school than the schools, but that it isn't a school at all. John Holt
__________________________________
Do you Yahoo!?
Yahoo! Hotjobs: Enter the "Signing Bonus" Sweepstakes
http://hotjobs.sweepstakes.yahoo.com/signingbonus
>I ran into trouble with this a while ago.
> My kids ask me for suggestions and ask my opinion.
> Sometimes I've told them I
> think they should wait to read something, because I
> know that for that child
> at that time that particular book or theme would be
> too disturbing, instead of
> thought provoking.
>
My 12yo is quite supersensitive to anything scarey,
anxiety producing, stressful, remotely suspenseful,
etc. mostly due to his inability to process what he is
seeing and hearing, and he has no ability to predict
what will happen in a situation that is not familiar,
not even in situations that are similar to others he
has experienced.
That is just Andrew, and it is ok. Reading Anne O.'s
essay really helped me see that, and be ok with who
Andrew is. ANYWAY...I am digressing a bit...
But it caused me problems because before I had always
censored what he watched, never even gave him the
option, knowing that he had this inability.
Once we let go of the rules, though, I didn't realize
he might still want me to preview things for him. It
seemed so controlling to me. One day I popped
Gremlins into the dvd for the 5yo and I to watch, and
didn't even think that it might be too much for the
12yo, but ever since then he has nightmares and can't
go to bed alone.
He felt betrayed by me. It has happened several times
over the past 6 months or so, before I realized he
really did want me to preview things and tell him what
to expect so he could decide. I would bring home
movies or netflix would arrive, and you could see the
anxiety in his eyes.
The pressure to watch things he never before would
even have been allowed to watch is there as well, from
siblings, cousins, friends, even Dad, until I finally
explained to him it was not good to push him in either
way.
So I have two who are relishing their new freedom, and
one who is scared to death of it. He doesn't feel
safe any more. He never knows if he walks into the tv
room if someone will be watching something that will
freak him out.
Any thoughts about this? Some way to find a balance?
=====
--Susan in VA
WifetoVegman
What is most important and valuable about the home as a base for children's growth into the world is not that it is a better school than the schools, but that it isn't a school at all. John Holt
__________________________________
Do you Yahoo!?
Yahoo! Hotjobs: Enter the "Signing Bonus" Sweepstakes
http://hotjobs.sweepstakes.yahoo.com/signingbonus
slb725dragon
Yes, Pam.
My 14 year old asked one day if we could rent The Ring. She said my
sister had seen it and thought Skye may like it. She asked if I would
watch it with her , and I did. It is a newer movie, sort of
horror. . . maybe a psychological thriller. Not sure. She enjoyed the
movie very much. Another one that she likes (a bit scarrier) is one
about killer tooth fairy, which she also asked me to watch with her.I
did. She also likes Stephen King movies like It, Cujo, Silver Bullet
and The Stand. I think that the next one we are watching together is
Salems Lot. My sister bought her The Ring for Christmas and she was
very happy for it.
My 11 year old has the option of watching all of the above movies as
well, but she will not. She doesn't like them. They make her
feel. . . uncomfortable? is that the word I'm looking for. Not
scared. She much prefers comdies like Miss Congeniality, Sweet Home
Alabama, Nine Months.
Yes, there are hints of sex in these movies, but no one is naked, etc.
They both know what sex is, as we discuss things, and they come up
with some very interesting questions for me:0
My nephew(9) loved Matrix Reloaded, I just find the one scene
inappropriate for my own childrens viewing. That is why I said that
it was just my opinion.
Shannon
My 14 year old asked one day if we could rent The Ring. She said my
sister had seen it and thought Skye may like it. She asked if I would
watch it with her , and I did. It is a newer movie, sort of
horror. . . maybe a psychological thriller. Not sure. She enjoyed the
movie very much. Another one that she likes (a bit scarrier) is one
about killer tooth fairy, which she also asked me to watch with her.I
did. She also likes Stephen King movies like It, Cujo, Silver Bullet
and The Stand. I think that the next one we are watching together is
Salems Lot. My sister bought her The Ring for Christmas and she was
very happy for it.
My 11 year old has the option of watching all of the above movies as
well, but she will not. She doesn't like them. They make her
feel. . . uncomfortable? is that the word I'm looking for. Not
scared. She much prefers comdies like Miss Congeniality, Sweet Home
Alabama, Nine Months.
Yes, there are hints of sex in these movies, but no one is naked, etc.
They both know what sex is, as we discuss things, and they come up
with some very interesting questions for me:0
My nephew(9) loved Matrix Reloaded, I just find the one scene
inappropriate for my own childrens viewing. That is why I said that
it was just my opinion.
Shannon
--- In [email protected], Genant2@a... wrote:
> >>My sister, though, puts no such limits on my nephew (9 years)
about even
> violence, and he has watched Matrix Reloaded. So every parent is
different I
> guess.<<
>
>
> We went to see Matrix Reloaded. My boys are 6 and 9. We saw the
first one
> and really liked it. My boys liked the action in the second one
but on the
> whole thought is was a very confusing movie, me too. LOL. As for
the sex scene
> they really didn't think much of it. My youngest said it was too
boring and
> it was a good time for a potty break. They both love action
movies.
>
> For the most part they are very good at censoring themselves. They
know what
> they do and do not like. Sometimes if I know a movie might have a
scary part
> I will tell them so they are prepared ahead of time. My oldest
hates scary
> movies, he is nine. He will choose to not watch or when it starts
to get scary
> he will leave the room for a few minutes. They think of sex scenes
as
> boring. It isn't what they want to watch and will generally go
play with LEGOs or
> something, it has no interest for them. Now when the action comes
back on they
> want to watch.
>
> They also don't like a lot of violence that is "real" looking.
They loved
> LOTR. Again thought some of the slower non-action parts were a
little boring,
> especially my youngest, he is six. They didn't like The Patriot.
To them it
> was too real and too bloody. They left the room and played on
their computers
> during that one.
>
> They are good at censoring for themselves. And I am sure their
tastes will
> change over the years.
> Pam G
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
slb725dragon
WOW! Okay. My 14 year old asked me a few months ago and asked when
she could wear tampons. I told her when she was an adult, and she got
upset with me. I WAS WRONG! When I buy my tampons, I know what I use,
and I just run in the store and grab. I never bothered to lokk at
anything else. They actually do have tampons for teens. I did not
know! Just in too much of a hurry to pay attention I suppose.
I appologized and ordered a couple of free samples from a company
that sells them for teens (?) not sure on the companies name.
I sat down with her and explained how to put it in. We looked at the
directions that came in the box so she could see what I was
explaining to her. She tried using the ones that I had ordered for
her, and didn't like them. She said that they are uncomfortable, and
I explained that if she really wanted to use them, then she should
practice a few more times. She just said, "no thank you, I'll just
stick with pads."
She may decide later on that she wants to use them, at least then
I'll know that she can, and not make that mistake again;)
Shannon
she could wear tampons. I told her when she was an adult, and she got
upset with me. I WAS WRONG! When I buy my tampons, I know what I use,
and I just run in the store and grab. I never bothered to lokk at
anything else. They actually do have tampons for teens. I did not
know! Just in too much of a hurry to pay attention I suppose.
I appologized and ordered a couple of free samples from a company
that sells them for teens (?) not sure on the companies name.
I sat down with her and explained how to put it in. We looked at the
directions that came in the box so she could see what I was
explaining to her. She tried using the ones that I had ordered for
her, and didn't like them. She said that they are uncomfortable, and
I explained that if she really wanted to use them, then she should
practice a few more times. She just said, "no thank you, I'll just
stick with pads."
She may decide later on that she wants to use them, at least then
I'll know that she can, and not make that mistake again;)
Shannon
>menstruation that
> I recently met a mom who was trying to find books about
> wouldn't mention tampons or in any way suggest girls might usethem. She was
> considering gluing the pages showing tampon insertion together inthe American
> Girls "Care and Keeping of Me" book because she otherwise likesthat book. Blew
> me away, to her it went right along with that all natural lifestyleshe's
> chasing after.
>
> Deborah in IL
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]