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In a message dated 9/27/2004 11:13:37 AM Eastern Daylight Time,
SandraDodd@... writes:

Frank Smith said when he spoke at the HSC conference a couple of years back
that people need to be with the people they want to become like (not a
quote,
he said it better). If people want to 'be recovered,' they need to be
around
people who care about not drinking (or whatever it is). If parents want to
become parents who are courageous about freedoms for children, they need to
commune with those kinds of parents (at least online or somehow if they
can't find
a group of them in person).



<<<<<

In less than a month, my family has spent a weekend at the L&L Unschooling
conference and at a local homeschooling (very relaxed) family camp-out.

We had a very good time at the camp-out----some very nice people and lots of
neat activities---all in the magic of the mountains. BUT... (ain't there
always? <g>)

It's so easy to see how Frank Smith's idea plays out. This was an inclusive
group---anyone can attend. It seems that most are unschoolers (several
radicals) and relaxed homeschoolers: they seem to be the only ones who are willing
to spend a weekend with their kids! <G> But it was NOT a solely radical
unschoolers group----and you could feel the difference.

I NEED to be around unschoolers. I know that. Just having a few curriculm
users there made it "acceptable" to use a curriculum! Made it OK to discuss
Saxon Math. Made it OK to yell at kids (not a lot; just a couple). It just
wasn't the same.

I think when your options are homeschoolers OR schoolers, then homeschoolers
are more like-mided. But if you have an option of unschoolers OR an
inclusive homeschool group----it's just not like-minded at all and.....well, it's
HARD to be around the c-word.

I guess I'm just not very inclusive! <G>

In the first hour of the L&L conference, a few of us heard a mom being very
short-tempered and snapping at her kids. One mom whispered to me, "I didn't
think I'd hear *that* an this conference." I responded that this was the first
hour---that she must be new, and that she won't be acting like that by
Sunday! I was right. <g>

Being surrounded by radical unschoolers makes it so much easier to BE a
radical unschooler. The feeling permeates the air---and US!

It was also easier to see how controlling your children is easier when
surrounded by controlling parents with controlled kids. Moms whose kids are
getting "out-of-hand" are immediately made to feel that they NEED to do something
about it.

We really had a good time, but we recognized *our* need to be around
unschooling families---around like minds.

~Kelly





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In a message dated 9/27/04 10:41:31 AM, kbcdlovejo@... writes:

<< I think when your options are homeschoolers OR schoolers, then
homeschoolers
are more like-mided. But if you have an option of unschoolers OR an
inclusive homeschool group----it's just not like-minded at all and.....well,
it's
HARD to be around the c-word. >>

Holly said after the trip to the Peabody conference that it was really nice
being around so many unschoolers, and the kids were different. She has
commented since (obviously still thinking about it) about kids from the structured
homeschooling families being less fun to be around. I mentioned this on another
list and a couple of people assured the list that THEIR kids couldn't tell
any difference and Holly must just be [what did they say? intolerant, I think].

I think Holly is perceptive and interested in the differences in families.
She knows the kind of parent she doesn't want to be, and in part it seems
she's going by the ways the children interact on the side, when the parents aren't
there.

Sandra

lgbryk

Being surrounded by radical unschoolers makes it so much easier to BE a
radical unschooler. The feeling permeates the air---and US!

~Kelly

I am relatively new to this list -- I joined after attending the Live and Learn conference. I have to say that this conference was really altering to me and my family. We have always felt uncomfortable in our local homeschooling groups, and truthfully didn't quite understand why. I must say that after a day at the conference we all just started feeling like we had found home. My daughter felt totally comfortable, and commented that everyone she met was different, and it was okay! They were not necessarily different like her, but different like themselves. So after trying to figure out what type of learners we are, we have learned that we are much more in tune with unschoolers. Why has it taken us so long? I am learning so much from this list, and I am questioning so much about myself as a parent. And I agree with needing to be around people who inspire me. Thank you!
Linda


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