Ali Kat

***Well here's your answer as to why your dd is bugging you so much. She is trying to cram the same hours of your attention [that those of us who don't need to do outside work are so fortunately able to give to our kids all day] into the few short hours between this other stuff you are doing and your need to get to bed. I don't pretend to have a solution, but it sure is understandable seen in that light.***

Yes, you are right. Part of me still harbors resentment toward my ex at times, because I was supposed to be the SAHM with a gaggle of kids to love and cherish� didn�t happen. I guess I need to get over it! Anyway� I know she needs time, and I had thought that devoting my 5pm to 9 pm hours with her (with time out for dinner prep) was okay. Part of me is frustrated because I�m not home more. I know sooooo many things would be different if I was. As it is right now I fight my stuff and my mother�s influences. I will be moving in January, but sometimes that seems like eons away! I have no clue what will happen with her to, so I have anxiety regarding that. If my mom refuses to watch her, I may need to put her in school � an idea I abhor! (okay� I�m derailing� lol� sowwy)

***Fill the sink with hot, sudsy water before you start to cook dinner.

Everything goes into it at once. Washing up is faster.***

I�ll try this� seems so simple I�m smacking my forehead.

***Put the garbage bag by your front door night before, and carry it down with you in the morning. A smaller bin is actually easier to empty more often than a larger one.***

I already do the smaller bin thing. I can�t put it directly by the front door because that�s the dog�s sleeping area and he�d tear the garbage to shreds. I�ll see if I can simply make a point to route myself through the kitchen in the AM.

***Do you have an internet grocer that will make deliveries in your area?***

I don�t know. I�ll have to check into this. It would definitely be worth the time saved.

***Someone once posted a website that was about daily menus and shopping lists***

I�ll check into this too.

***I buy paper goods in bulk from a warehouse store - one of Jayn's favorite outings.***

I�ll try this too. My dislike of using paper products may be because it�s frowned upon in my family. But� I need to be less concerned with everyone else�s opinions and do what�s best for my munckin!

**I'm often tired and lazy-feeling at night. If I prepare the dinner in

the morning when I have energy***

I�ll see what I can do about this too. My typical pattern is to fall out of bed, shower in 5 minutes, dry hair for 5 minutes, dress, and head out the door. I�m up 30 min tops in the AM before leaving the house. Perhaps I can try to go to bed earlier to get up earlier.

***Ah the laundry.***

I still live in my mom�s house � so we have laundry facilities readily available. I do better mentally if I do a little at a time. Otherwise I feel overwhelmed. Plus, my mom used to do all the laundry on one day and she ended up spending hours and hours doing it, then we spent hours and hours putting it away. I hate that!!! Lol� I do forget a lot too� I intend on drying the laundry, but I simply forget it�s there. *sigh*

***<warning, tongue in cheek alert...>

Borrow 3 or 4 more kids of various ages for a month. Then go back to

having one. You will be amazed at how much time you have ;-)***

LOL� I�m 1 of 9 kids � believe me, I know! I wish I had a few more, but I guess that�s neither here nor there. LOL.

***I include my in activitues like doing the dishes or cleaning. ***

I think I need to be better at asking/including. I�ll try this.

***its possible that you are giving her part-time harried attention all the time***

Perhaps you are right. Maybe I just THINK I�m �here� when I�m not� I�ll have to pay better attention to this. I did take something I read yesterday and was amazed at how it worked for me. One of the posters said she schedules worry time (or something to that effect). I told myself that I�d worry about XYZ at such and such time, and it worked. It crept up once, and I said to myself: �Self� you are going to worry/think about that later.� And that was it. I like this idea a ton! I usually have such a hard time turning my brain off� it�s always going and going.

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