Pris

Re: [Unschooling-dotcom] unused crib-family bed
from one adoptive/foster care mom to another ~> I agree  ... w/ the foster care and adoptions system it's best to TREAD THOSE WATERS CAUTIOUSLY and PLAY THEIR GAME, just keep your eye on the prize (your dch) and go along w/ whatever the caseworkers want :P   dh and I were foster parents for years and we  adopted our two youngest (private adoptions), so we've literally sat on both sides of the fence .. working w/i *that* system is like living under a crucible 24/7; believe me they'll know anything/everything about you, better than your very own mother does!!!  good luck and those little butterflies will be WELL WORTH the pains of dealing w/ a very rigid/temperamental system ... *wow*, both of our dss' adoptions were finalized in 6 mths, GOODNESS, I can't imagine waiting an entire YEAR to have those papers in my hot little hand???  of course, different states have different laws, so just play by their rules!!!    just remember, when all is said and done, you can have your fm bed WHEN YOU GET THE BUREAUCRATS OUTTA YOUR LIFE and that day WILL COME, just hold on!!! 
 
btw, I'm curious Nanci, what does your caseworker(s) think about your family h-s'ing or for that matter
*unschooling*???  how did you answer *those* questions???   sometimes, you can luck out and find very open~minded caseworkers but those are *rare* jewels who unfortunately have to work w/ a very regulated bureaucratic system!!! dh always says "God bless the Baptist and the bureaucrats" (btw, we're Baptist <G>)
 
HANG IN THERE and keep us posted!!!
Pris
----- Original Message -----
From: CA Nelson
Sent: Thursday, June 22, 2000 12:39 PM
Subject: Re: [Unschooling-dotcom] unused crib-family bed

Nanci-
   Congratulations on your adoption. That must be such an exciting time. It is too bad that you will be under such tough scrutiny and the family bed could be considered "dangerous." Of course it depends on the individual child, but you would think these "unwanted" children would receive the greatest benefit from the closeness and security of the family bed.

--
Amy Nelson
Mama to Accalia (6/14/99)
"The hardest to learn was the least complicated." - The Indigo Girls

<sigh>
We sometimes take the kids into our beds for the usual, nightmares, can't sleep, need reassurance, etc.  But we are in the middle of adoption from foster care and I'm afraid that we will not be able to have a family bed, although I would like to.  Kids from foster care have issues, pasts, inappropriate boundaries, etc, as well as being hyper analyzed by the system for over the first year after the adoption.  We have to be very careful.  Ideas that are too much off of mainstream are frowned on.
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