playing with fire.....
deedeanne
When I was around 8yo I was playing with matches and toothpicks,
seeing how close they could get before igniting. I was alone in our
basement/playroom because I was forbidden to play with matches.
After blowing them out, I threw them away. Of course, one wasn't
fully out and started a fire in the trash can. I ran straight for a
bucket of water, put it out, and went upstairs after I stopped
shaking enough and "confessed" to my parents. They had no idea, and
were quite shocked as I rarely disoebeyed, and that scary experiment
gave even more weight to the "Mom's always right. She has more
experience and knows what she's talking about." tape that played in
my head for too many years.
OTOH, my 12yo has been allowed to experiment with fire, legal
fireworks, and such with our supervision from a younger age than I
was comfortable. DH was happy to participate and guide him in those
endeavors! I was so amazed when DS and his friend figured out how to
start fires with magnifying glasses on a camping trip. I had never
seen or done that as a child so I was just as excited as the kids!
When we were at a local park, not long after that camping trip, a
woman came up to us and asked if we had any matches. She was with a
big group of people who had a whole picnic set up, but no one had
matches to start the grill. I said, "No, sorry." Then I
remembered, "But we do have a magnifying glass." She looked at me
like I had three heads and said, "So?" I pulled it out of my
backpack, gave it to my son and told him to go and help them start
their fire. He and his friend went, and were back in a few minutes
with huge grins on their faces. That was one of my favorite
unschooling/thinking outside the box moments.
Anyway, I guess I just wanted to agree with everyone who is saying
that forbidding things from children obviously doesn't protect them
from whatever it is. Information, experience appropriate to that
child's age, personality, tempermant is much better insurance in my
mind.
Deanne
seeing how close they could get before igniting. I was alone in our
basement/playroom because I was forbidden to play with matches.
After blowing them out, I threw them away. Of course, one wasn't
fully out and started a fire in the trash can. I ran straight for a
bucket of water, put it out, and went upstairs after I stopped
shaking enough and "confessed" to my parents. They had no idea, and
were quite shocked as I rarely disoebeyed, and that scary experiment
gave even more weight to the "Mom's always right. She has more
experience and knows what she's talking about." tape that played in
my head for too many years.
OTOH, my 12yo has been allowed to experiment with fire, legal
fireworks, and such with our supervision from a younger age than I
was comfortable. DH was happy to participate and guide him in those
endeavors! I was so amazed when DS and his friend figured out how to
start fires with magnifying glasses on a camping trip. I had never
seen or done that as a child so I was just as excited as the kids!
When we were at a local park, not long after that camping trip, a
woman came up to us and asked if we had any matches. She was with a
big group of people who had a whole picnic set up, but no one had
matches to start the grill. I said, "No, sorry." Then I
remembered, "But we do have a magnifying glass." She looked at me
like I had three heads and said, "So?" I pulled it out of my
backpack, gave it to my son and told him to go and help them start
their fire. He and his friend went, and were back in a few minutes
with huge grins on their faces. That was one of my favorite
unschooling/thinking outside the box moments.
Anyway, I guess I just wanted to agree with everyone who is saying
that forbidding things from children obviously doesn't protect them
from whatever it is. Information, experience appropriate to that
child's age, personality, tempermant is much better insurance in my
mind.
Deanne
TreeGoddess
My 3yo DD likes to watch matches burn. During the Winter we sat in the
bathroom (tile floor - no rug) and I'd strike the match for her. She'd
take it from me, watch it burn, the blow it out. Then she'd put it in
the toilet. We went through a couple books of matches over 2 or 3 days
and then she pretty much lost interest. Every once in a while -- if she
sees me lighting a candle -- she'll want to do a few, but (because she
CAN) it's not so exciting any more. :)
-Tracy-
bathroom (tile floor - no rug) and I'd strike the match for her. She'd
take it from me, watch it burn, the blow it out. Then she'd put it in
the toilet. We went through a couple books of matches over 2 or 3 days
and then she pretty much lost interest. Every once in a while -- if she
sees me lighting a candle -- she'll want to do a few, but (because she
CAN) it's not so exciting any more. :)
-Tracy-