Erika Nunn

But before that question, I just wanted to add (regarding the praise
question) that sometimes I only say, "Those lines are interesting," because
all that is on the paper IS lines. And lots of them. lol

But on to my cleaning room question. Again, my children are ages 3 and 4.
I want to know what you guys do when it comes to keeping your children's
room clean (and the rest of the house of their toys). It seems that my
children can produce a mess (to them it is all exploration and play, of
course) within about 10 minutes time. For example, they love their closet.
Sometimes if left alone in their room, they will completely dismantle the
entire thing, taking all their clothes off the hangers so they have a monkey
bar, taking apart boxes to make ladders, etc. Honestly, I am (almost - ha)
always really happy to see them happy and having fun making their closet
into some great land of monkeys. However, when the game is over, what is
left is this disastorous closet. (I have explained that they can move their
clothes over to make room for the monkey bar, and that they can ask me to
help them make a ladder, etc). What my question is, is that when kids DO
make a mess, do you guys feel it is important to "make" them help you clean
it up with you? Or do you just clean it up yourself in good nature? I know
all about making cleaning fun, etc., but what if they both say, "no, we are
going to go play," and the job is left to you?

Also, what about the overall standards of their bedrooms? I know rotten
food is one thing that HAS to be dealt with, but other than that do you just
let them keep their rooms in the state they want to keep them in? I would
not think about it if my children were older, because I would know they had
the ability to clean their room if they wanted to. But I am not really sure
at what point I should just stop cleaning their room and let them handle it?
Right now I usually clean their room everyday and don't expect them to
help me. Or should I?

Okay, I am rambling here, but I am sure you get my point. From reading the
past threads, I have gotten the sense that most of you tend to just let your
kids pitch in when they want to, and that tends to happen when they reach an
older age...?

All advice is greatly appreciated!

Erika :)


Dawn Adams

erika writes:
>For example, they love their closet.
>Sometimes if left alone in their room, they will completely dismantle the
>entire thing, taking all their clothes off the hangers so they have a monkey
>bar, taking apart boxes to make ladders, etc.
>
>
Why not just give over? Put their clothes in your closet or another one? I moved my daughter's dresser into our room because she always emptied it onto her floor. She still gets clothes from our room but doesn't create the same mess. If there's always a mess that's an indication it's not working so make their closet into what they want and find room for what's there now in some other place.

>Or do you just clean it up yourself in good nature? I know
>all about making cleaning fun, etc., but what if they both say, "no, we are
>going to go play," and the job is left to you?
>
>
Then I ask them to do it when they're done or do it myself. It's their room and if the mess isn't their top priority you guys can negotiate a better time. If not, If it's your priority then I'd say you do it. :)


>Also, what about the overall standards of their bedrooms? I know rotten
>food is one thing that HAS to be dealt with, but other than that do you just
>let them keep their rooms in the state they want to keep them in? I would
>not think about it if my children were older, because I would know they had
>the ability to clean their room if they wanted to. But I am not really sure
>at what point I should just stop cleaning their room and let them handle it?
>
>
Work to avoid the messes. My daughter's (now my son's as well) is really too small for too much so that was creating horrible messes. I moved out most of the toys to a part of the living room, made sure they were well organized with their own containers (the key to messes for me is always make sure there's a spot for everything, a basic organization beneath the mess so even if the house is a disaster I've got a starting point and it doesn't take that long to clean). Now my daughter has books, a spring horse, CD player and a change table with CD's and cassettes in the drawer and stuffed animals filling it up. And that's it besides the bunk beds (wonderful purchase, for $150C online at Ikea my daughter has a private play area that her brother can't get to...and I never have to notice the never made bed). They play in the living room.

Ok, I think I'll share my newly thought of philosophy of housework here. It started when my sister was over and chasing the kids around. I was straightening up the livingroom and had just finished piling up blocks (Big cardboard ones. We have, in all, 10 or eleven different kinds of wood, plastic and cardboard blocks. I feel so wealthy. :) ) when my son (2) ran into the room, saw the blocks and immediatly tore down the pile. I smiled and shook my head. My sister, who'd arrived in time to see this, sternly said, "Harry! Your mother just finished putting those away!" When she said that I felt offended. Didn't she know I only pile those blocks so that Harry can knock them down? And there was the Aha! I looked around the room at the clean living room and realized that was why I did any cleaning.
We don't clean up messes to have a clean house. We clean up messes so there is room for more mess!
Now I think of cleaning up after my kids as replacing a canvas. I do it with the thought that by giving them room again and a bare floor and organized toys to pick from I'm handing them the tools to write another mess onto our house. It's meant that at the end of a day, or sometimes a few days in a row, I just let the mess stay, because really, it's a work of art or a story. Maybe it isn't finished. Maybe it's too interesting to be gotten rid of so soon. It also clears up my feelings of resentment about doing the bulk of it. I like being the one to reset the house so that we all can live another, different mess the next day.
Anyway, thought I'd share since it's really helped me bring more joy into the housework!

Dawn (in NS)



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Genant2@aol...

In a message dated 1/26/04 4:17:54 AM Eastern Standard Time,
erikanunn@... writes:

> For example, they love their closet.
> Sometimes if left alone in their room, they will completely dismantle the
> entire thing, taking all their clothes off the hangers so they have a monkey
>
> bar,

Oh man...monkey bars inside the house. I never thought of that. I bet my
boys would love that. A smaller one that would fit the length of their room.
ladders on each end and a support in the middle. I bet we could make that. Oh
the boys will go crazy when I mention that idea. Thanks for the idea.
Pam G.


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Aimee

Thank you so much for sharing your AHA moment, this
will help me tremendously!!

Clean canvas..... My son does have more bursts of
creativity when his stuff is organized, but I have
been getting a tad resentful lately.

Thanks for helping me get to that different
perspective I KNEW I needed, but couldn't quite get to
on my own!

~Aimee


<<<We don't clean up messes to have a clean house. We
clean up
messes so there is room for more mess!
Now I think of cleaning up after my kids as
replacing a canvas. I
do it with the thought that by giving them room again
and a bare floor
and organized toys to pick from I'm handing them the
tools to write
another mess onto our house....... Anyway, thought I'd
share since it's really helped me bring more
joy into the housework!>>>

SandraDodd@aol...

In a message dated 1/26/04 1:35:26 PM, aimeel73@... writes:

<< Clean canvas..... My son does have more bursts of
creativity when his stuff is organized, but I have
been getting a tad resentful lately. >>

Part of teaching art or cooking (or anything messy) is cleaning up before the
next session. Even if other participants help (or are made to) clean, it's
really the responsibility of the teacher to prepare the area for the next
session.

And when a parent chooses to homeschool, it doesn't seem unreasonable to me
for part of that duty to involve making sure kids have opportunities, and part
of opportunity is space, equipment, etc.

I straighten up around video games sometimes, even if I hadn't played and am
not going to. I'll straight out cords, roll up unused extra controllers,
re-file games, dust things off. I could "make them" but they're probably off
doing something else that involves learning and being happy, and so I do it as a
secret gift to them because I love them and I'm glad I'm home.

Sandra

Robyn Coburn

<<Or do you just clean it up yourself in good nature?>>



Yes, I do this. My dd is 4, and we all share the one bedroom, as well as the
living room of the apartment.

Jayn sometimes helps, but her real love is scrubbing the kitchen surfaces.

Robyn L. Coburn

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