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Thanks Tanya,

Sounds like your having fun. Thats great. Have you been unschooling since
last Feb. or this Feb.? I have been all over the message boards and I know
everyone says just be patient and I think for the most part I am, but I feel
like she should be doing something other than t.v. the only thing is I feel
bad because she only watches the " GOOD" stations. Like the Kratt brother,
Animal Planet, National G. , or she watches videos , dont get me wrong she
watches other stuff besides animals but its mostly Disney or Nickalodean.
Every once in a while she will surprise me and do something else. And I
always encourage this. She always seem to Know when to turn herself off.
(when mom is being to enthusiastic, she automatically think its schooly and
wont even give it a chance.) I try to be mildly interested but she sees right
through that. I dont think Im coming off as pushy , the most I say is "That
looks like fun, or that's interesting." These are activities that she picks
on her own. One word from me and she immediately loses interest. So I try not
to say anything , then she feels like I'm ignoring her? Kids....who gets
them? I thought I did but , well I guess not. I'm sorry to rant but at this
point I think I just need to blow off the steam. She has done a little
cooking, today we are going to the back yard to try our hand at gardening.
This ought to be fun, I hope. She hasnt quite caught the idea that flowers
take a while to grow......hope she dosnt turn it off.

Thanks for listening
Tamie

B & T Simpson

Hi Tamie,
we have been unschooling since last Feb and we love it, there are some days
I wonder mostly because my children like to take 4 hours or more to
complete simple chores they have for the day thus wasting the entire day!!!
this gets on my nerves allot! I have cut out the t.v almost all together,
and this helps with the attitude allot, it seems whenever they watch allot
of t.v. they become lethargic and cranky! I do not require them to do any
work, but I do phrase it like this, you need to be doing something to
enhance your brain, educational videos and t.v. fit into that along with
reading writing , legos, crafts,
computer programs, cooking stuff like that, rather than video games and t.v.
they seem to like this well. I sit and listen to what they say, look at
books they have chosen, and try to answer questions they have, and it seems
they have lots of interests, my youngest builds all the time, the middle
one is interested in Shakespeare, and the oldest just spends all of her
free time reading!!!!!
hang in there and listen to her you will find she is learning more than you
think!
Tanya


>Hi Everyone,
>
>I havent been around much lately. Things are just soooo busy. Anyhow,
>I have been homeschooling since Dec. and only unschooling since Feb.
>I was just wondering how long do I just sit back and let her
>(Kearstin-81/2Yog) "Deschool"? She just wants to watch T.V., shes up
>till all hours of the night. And I noticed a great increase in
>appetite and gaining weight!! (getting nervous) We go to the library
>once a week and she gets alot of videos on animals and stuff like that
>mostly national geographic. And I thought she wasnt learning anything
>but Im getting nervous about all the hanging around so I started a
>game of 20 questions in the car and she picked animals as her cat.
>she did really good on exotic animals but couldnt figure out what cat
>was? (maybe too obvious?) We have not covered any other subjects and
>when I bring anything up she gets aggravated with me. We havent even
>thought about testing yet, and even though my state (NH) is pretty
>easy to please, it is getting late in the season and now Im afraid to
>test her. Has anyone heard of the PASS Test and do you know anything
>about it? I have noticed a big difference in her attitude which to me
>aught to be good enough I thought that was a great feat. She lapses
>into that "Cocky" attitude every once in a while but just a look gets
>rid of it. and we are a little more like partners now , I think we
>need a little more practice but were getting there. Well Id like to
>hear from anyone one who has a hard time to be patient. And the
>waiting game is giving me a.....(I dont know, something though)
>
>Thanks Everyone
>Tamie
>
>
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A S (Gus) Griffin

Regarding recent postings about the early "panic stage" of unschooling, I thought it might be helpful if I shared an excerpt from an article I wrote more than a year ago.  It is about my own experience with free schooling, rather than unschooling, but the principle involved in this particle excerpt is exactly the same.
 
(This material is copyright (c) 1999 by AS Griffin.) 
 
 

" . . . every person already has an extremely effective natural ability to learn and gain skills, which should be encouraged and fostered rather than controlled and interfered with.

"The person who understood this best in this century was an educational genius from Scotland, A.S. Neill, who founded a famous school called Summerhill in England in the 1920s. (It is still going today.) When I was fourteen years old, I was lucky enough to go to Barker Free School, a boarding school in Canada, which was run just like Summerhill.

"Neill was adamant that you must never force a child to learn. Which meant I didn’t have to attend any classes if I didn’t want to. So I didn’t. Occasionally I would rouse myself to play soccer if I felt like it. And when the school bought an old Plymouth and stuck it in a field where we couldn’t do too much harm with it, every once in a while I’d have a bash at learning how to drive. But most of the time all I did was lie around.

"In the first six months I never even opened a textbook, but I did get through more than two hundred Marvel comics. ‘The Mighty Thor’ was my favourite. I tell you, for a 14-year-old boy that place was paradise.

"It sounds like not much was happening, doesn’t it? Well, in fact, a great deal of untangling was going on in my head, out of sight to everyone including myself. My natural ability and desire to learn had been so bruised and battered from ten years of force-fed schooling, that it was taking it a while to wake up to the fact that it could do whatever it wanted to now.

"After two years of "free schooling", I went back into the normal school system. I passed exams for all of Year 10 and half of Year 11. In other words, I was about four months behind where I would have been if I had stayed in high school. But I knew catching up would be no problem, because I hardly touched a textbook before sitting those exams. In fact, only on five separate days had I done any formal textbook study in the whole two years. So my knowledge hadn’t really changed at all.

"What had changed is that my natural ability to learn had been wonderfully rehabilitated, just by everybody leaving it alone. So it was much easier for me to use the knowledge I had already learned, and to gain more whenever I felt like it. Which has helped me enormously throughout the rest of my life.

"This experience also gave me a special awareness of this instinctive learning faculty we all possess, which I’ve been fascinated with, and tinkering with, for over thirty years now. Thanks to A.S. Neill, and the wise teachers who applied his principles to that "lazy" 14-year-old . . . "

 

This is a wonderful site, by the way!

Gus Griffin

 


B & T Simpson

Last Feb for the oldest who is ADD and 13 now she was in the sixth grade
she would pick what she wanted to do Mostly late at night , in the
beginning, I panicked and decided I should lay out a little bit of work from
several subjects (nothing to difficult just stuff to work on) as soon as I
did that, she completely shut down and did nothing! she didn't verbalize
that she wasn't going to do it she just plain used every avoidance technique
known to children and didn't do it! so I went back to leaving her alone,
infact, I put all school books up (still accessible) and got rid of her
desk , at the point of pulling her out of school, she was in the sixth
grade and reading comprehension was at less than 3rd grade I told her to
drop down to whatever level she enjoyed,
she dropped herself down to the 1st grade level and read there for a very
long time, now one year later she is reading everything she can get her
hands on adult books, harry potter books ect. (this is a child who could
not comprehend little house in the sixth grade!) she is doing wonderful now
and averages at least one book a night !!!!!
the youngest has no interest in reading anything but his lego mag and one
book he has been reading for most of the year! the middle child likes
Shakespeare , and things to do with acting, she also reads a variety of
books but not as feverishly as the first child! those two have only been
home since Sept.
well, megga long run on sentence, but I hope it helped you relax a bit!
Tanya


>>Sounds like your having fun. Thats great. Have you been unschooling since
>last Feb. or this Feb.? I have been all over the message boards and I
know
>everyone says just be patient and I think for the most part I am, but I
feel
>like she should be doing something other than t.v. the only thing is I feel
>bad because she only watches the " GOOD" stations. Like the Kratt
brother,
>Animal Planet, National G. , or she watches videos , dont get me wrong she
>watches other stuff besides animals but its mostly Disney or Nickalodean.
>Every once in a while she will surprise me and do something else. And I
>always encourage this. She always seem to Know when to turn herself off.
>(when mom is being to enthusiastic, she automatically think its schooly and
>wont even give it a chance.) I try to be mildly interested but she sees
right
>through that. I dont think Im coming off as pushy , the most I say is
"That
>looks like fun, or that's interesting." These are activities that she picks
>on her own. One word from me and she immediately loses interest. So I try
not
>to say anything , then she feels like I'm ignoring her? Kids....who gets
>them? I thought I did but , well I guess not. I'm sorry to rant but at this
>point I think I just need to blow off the steam. She has done a little
>cooking, today we are going to the back yard to try our hand at gardening.
>This ought to be fun, I hope. She hasnt quite caught the idea that flowers
>take a while to grow......hope she dosnt turn it off.
>
>Thanks for listening
>Tamie
>
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In a message dated 05/03/2000 4:23:00 PM !!!First Boot!!!, Tamilooch@...
writes:

<< Every once in a while she will surprise me and do something else. And I
always encourage this. She always seem to Know when to turn herself off.
(when mom is being to enthusiastic, she automatically think its schooly and
wont even give it a chance.) I try to be mi >>


I have one of these kids too. When he's in "that" mood, showing any sort of
positive attention is seen as just toooooo much Mom attention. So he turns
off. Luckily, this comes in spurts. So there are some (really many) times
when I am happy because he is being "productive." One of these days I'll
grow up!

How old is your daughter anyway? I missed that part of the post.

Gardening project we are doing: it satisfies the Mom requirement of being
"educational" and is fun so the kids like it. We got the free seed packets
from NASA -- they have tomato seeds that have been up on the Space Shuttle
and ones that haven't and you are supposed to grow them and compare. Mostly,
we have just been "observing" these plants get way to big for the plot we put
them in!!

Good luck. It sounds like it will all work out with time. And gardening may
be just the soothing activity needed -- for you!! :):)

Nance

[email protected]

In a message dated 5/3/00 12:05:43 PM Central Daylight Time,
enthusiastic@... writes:

<< free schooling, rather than unschooling, but the principle involved in
this particle excerpt is exactly the same.

>>
Hi Gus, Could you (or anyone else) help me understand the difference(s)
between free schooling, and unschooling? Thanks in advance. I am interested
in the current topic of wondering when a child will catch the outwardly
visible "learning bug". I have a 5 yo son who is very strong willed, and if
he feels the least bit pushed into something, he will reject it. He has
never been to school, he is just hard headed. :) I am not at all concerned
that he spends the vast majority of his time outdoors playing, as it is truly
what he needs. But this topic caught my attention as I have often wondered
about his stubborness, and how he is so challenging. He is really testing me
lately regarding following rules. Does anyone find by letting their child
take the initiative in learning, that a smart-alec attitude sometimes
surfaces, too? I realize that it is more of a parental/ discipline matter,
but sometimes educational and discipline areas overlap. Thanks for any
thoughts on this! Karen

A S (Gus) Griffin

Hi Karen,
 
The term "unschooling" is fairly new to me.  Apparently it was coined by John Holt, an acclaimed American education reformer.  Free-schooling was founded by AS Neill, a British educator, back in 1921 when he set up the Summerhill school. 
 
Being new to unschooling, I'm not really qualified to make a comparison between the two.  But as far as I can tell they both advocate giving the child enough space to come to learning on their own terms. 
 
The term free-schooling refers to a special type of school that kids go to or board at, not home study.   Perhaps unschooling is simply the home-schooling version of free-schooling.  I'm not sure if this is correct or not.
 
As far as the rest of your questions about your boy is concerned, I'd better let more experienced "unschoolers" respond to that.  The free-schooling situation is different inasmuch as there are more other children around for a child to model off than there is in your boy's situation.  So the dynamics of the situation would be somewhat different.
 
Regards, Gus
 
----- Original Message -----
 
Sent: Thursday, May 04, 2000 2:52 AM
Subject: Re: [Unschooling-dotcom] How Long?

In a message dated 5/3/00 12:05:43 PM Central Daylight Time,
enthusiastic@... writes:

<< free schooling, rather than unschooling, but the principle involved in
this particle excerpt is exactly the same.

>>
Hi Gus,  Could you (or anyone else) help me understand the difference(s)
between free schooling, and unschooling?  Thanks in advance.  I am interested
in the current topic of wondering when a child will catch the outwardly
visible "learning bug".  I have a 5 yo son who is very strong willed, and if
he feels the least bit pushed into something, he will reject it.  He has
never been to school, he is just hard headed. :)  I am not at all concerned
that he spends the vast majority of his time outdoors playing, as it is truly
what he needs.   But this topic caught my attention  as I have often wondered
about his stubborness, and how he is so challenging.  He is really testing me
lately regarding following rules.  Does anyone find by letting their child
take the initiative in learning, that a smart-alec attitude sometimes
surfaces, too?  I realize that it is more of a parental/ discipline matter,
but sometimes educational and discipline areas overlap.  Thanks for any
thoughts on this!                               Karen


[email protected]

In a message dated 05/03/2000 9:22:45 AM Pacific Daylight Time,
Tamilooch@... writes:

<< oday we are going to the back yard to try our hand at gardening.
This ought to be fun, I hope. She hasnt quite caught the idea that flowers
take a while to grow......hope she dosnt turn it off. >>

Maybe she would like to mark on the calendar when the seeds are supposed
to sprout and check off the days, something to look forward to?We have been
growing things from seed around here too, in addition to purchasing some
small vegetable plants we are getting ready to transplant.
Kathy

[email protected]

In a message dated 05/03/2000 11:53:21 AM Pacific Daylight Time,
HPaulson5@... writes:

<< I have a 5 yo son who is very strong willed, and if
he feels the least bit pushed into something, he will reject it. He has
never been to school, he is just hard headed. :) I am not at all concerned
that he spends the vast majority of his time outdoors playing, as it is
truly
what he needs. But this topic caught my attention as I have often
wondered
about his stubborness, and how he is so challenging. He is really testing
me
lately regarding following rules. Does anyone find by letting their child
take the initiative in learning, that a smart-alec attitude sometimes
surfaces, too? >>

He sounds very 5 yr old boyish : ) I have one who has certainly been a
challenge to me in the past (and present!). I looked at the behaviors that
drove me crazy and realised that they were the very behaviors I would
admire or appreciate in a grown man (or not as the case may be LOL). I
also noticed that these same behaviors, strong willed, stubborn, determined,
single minded, goes to the beat of a different drummer were all the things
his father is, things I admire. Its just difficult when your the mother, and
that little man is still a young person and your trying to live together
safely
and happily in your home together! Good that your little guy has lots
of outdoor time. Its what they seem to need : )
Kathy

[email protected]

In a message dated 5/4/00 12:35:17 AM Central Daylight Time,
Natrlmama@... writes:

<< He sounds very 5 yr old boyish : ) I have one who has certainly been a
challenge to me in the past (and present!). I looked at the behaviors that
drove me crazy and realised that they were the very behaviors I would
admire or appreciate in a grown man (or not as the case may be LOL). I
also noticed that these same behaviors, strong willed, stubborn, determined,
single minded, goes to the beat of a different drummer were all the things
his father is, things I admire. Its just difficult when your the mother, and
that little man is still a young person and your trying to live together
safely
and happily in your home together! Good that your little guy has lots
of outdoor time. Its what they seem to need : )
Kathy >>

Thanks, Kathy, it's always reassuring to hear from someone else
who has "walked in these shoes" !!
Karen

[email protected]

Thanks Kathy,
That is a good idea. She can be so inpatient. That might hold her over. We
went out there yes. and dug a 5x5 hole to start , guess who got to dig? We
were eaten by may flies and I got a sunburn on my neck! She had fun though
lots of "Bugs" to look at, she wants to go to the library today to get a book
that we checked out last week but we never got a chance to read it. It tells
about everything for kids to garden and what kinds of soil and what kinds of
bugs are good for the garden and such, I read through it and it seemed like a
really good book. So far so good.

Thanks
Tamie

[email protected]

In a message dated 05/04/2000 6:55:50 AM Pacific Daylight Time,
Tamilooch@... writes:

<< hanks Kathy,
That is a good idea. She can be so inpatient. That might hold her over. We
went out there yes. and dug a 5x5 hole to start , guess who got to dig? >>

Ugh, we just bought two avocado trees 15 gallon....been soaking the ground.
Hope dh will do it before I have too LOL. We are planting some veggies
in pots, tomatoe, cucumber and in the ground squash and chili's. These
are for my dd "business". Then today I couldn't pass up this beautiful
rose trellis style rose bush. It will look positively gorgeous growing up
the front
wall of the house! Have fun.!
Kathy