introducing the Roll family
Ren
Judie,
I know you were well intentioned when you signed your children up for those classes...but when a child expresses and interest in a topic, formal lessons are often the best way to squelch the interest.
Children are like butterflies. They need to flit from thing to thing, test, experiment and dabble.
When they become fascinated with something, they don't have any previous experience to know whether or not the topic will hold their interest or whether it will meet expectations. How could they? I think our job is to give them loads of whatever experiences they want, with no strings attached and let them build up enough experiences to know what they really are passionate about.
My ds Trevor has never stuck with anything for very long until this year. And at 13.5, he IS interested in lessons of some types...but we are very, very choosy about the person and place to which they go for lessons.
His guitar teacher only helps Trevor learn the songs HE wants to learn, nothing forced upon him, no strings attached. We can quit anytime, it's a month to month plan. I never, ever sign my kids up for anything with a contract. As parents, we should know that is a mistake.
It's a completely different maturity level that allows people to sign work contracts, most children don't have that maturity level or enough experience to commit long term.
If I had been allowed to come and go from piano as a child, I never would have quit permenently. Expectations and pressure do a lot of damage to the joy of learning. I STILL love to dabble as an adult. Signing a contract of any kind is something I doubt I'd ever do.
The best thing you can do when your child develops an interest in something, is get them the tools for said interest, and let them play with the tools for a while. If after dabbling with the tools, they want more, help them get some books or information of the internet or find a person with the same interest to chat with.
If interests continues after that, THEN you might want to find classes for them. Sometimes, hanging out with a more experienced person might be all they need. Children learn best by hanging out with more skilled people and being allowed to do the thing they love!:)
IF classes are chosen, make sure you research and find a teacher that is compatible with the unschooling philosophies. Someone that will accept month to month payments and wants to let the child decide the direction of the course. When they get older, a class that isn't quite so child-led might be fine...but heck, even in High School the photography classes let you choose your direction.
THat's my .02 on classes and children. I realize your ds's are a bit older, but I think because of all the damage inflicted upon them, they need a lot of down time! Let them dabble. Don't jump in to sign them up for classes when they express an interest in something. Help them find information (and stop when they don't seem interested anymore) and tools.
As an amateur photographer myself, I have to say the best learning I ever did was by just DOING what I love. I have never, ever taken a single photography class, and yet I have pictures that are quite good (if I must say so) and have been paid to take pictures for other folks more than once.
Ren
I know you were well intentioned when you signed your children up for those classes...but when a child expresses and interest in a topic, formal lessons are often the best way to squelch the interest.
Children are like butterflies. They need to flit from thing to thing, test, experiment and dabble.
When they become fascinated with something, they don't have any previous experience to know whether or not the topic will hold their interest or whether it will meet expectations. How could they? I think our job is to give them loads of whatever experiences they want, with no strings attached and let them build up enough experiences to know what they really are passionate about.
My ds Trevor has never stuck with anything for very long until this year. And at 13.5, he IS interested in lessons of some types...but we are very, very choosy about the person and place to which they go for lessons.
His guitar teacher only helps Trevor learn the songs HE wants to learn, nothing forced upon him, no strings attached. We can quit anytime, it's a month to month plan. I never, ever sign my kids up for anything with a contract. As parents, we should know that is a mistake.
It's a completely different maturity level that allows people to sign work contracts, most children don't have that maturity level or enough experience to commit long term.
If I had been allowed to come and go from piano as a child, I never would have quit permenently. Expectations and pressure do a lot of damage to the joy of learning. I STILL love to dabble as an adult. Signing a contract of any kind is something I doubt I'd ever do.
The best thing you can do when your child develops an interest in something, is get them the tools for said interest, and let them play with the tools for a while. If after dabbling with the tools, they want more, help them get some books or information of the internet or find a person with the same interest to chat with.
If interests continues after that, THEN you might want to find classes for them. Sometimes, hanging out with a more experienced person might be all they need. Children learn best by hanging out with more skilled people and being allowed to do the thing they love!:)
IF classes are chosen, make sure you research and find a teacher that is compatible with the unschooling philosophies. Someone that will accept month to month payments and wants to let the child decide the direction of the course. When they get older, a class that isn't quite so child-led might be fine...but heck, even in High School the photography classes let you choose your direction.
THat's my .02 on classes and children. I realize your ds's are a bit older, but I think because of all the damage inflicted upon them, they need a lot of down time! Let them dabble. Don't jump in to sign them up for classes when they express an interest in something. Help them find information (and stop when they don't seem interested anymore) and tools.
As an amateur photographer myself, I have to say the best learning I ever did was by just DOING what I love. I have never, ever taken a single photography class, and yet I have pictures that are quite good (if I must say so) and have been paid to take pictures for other folks more than once.
Ren