[email protected]

Well, like someone else said (was it the other Nancy?) things will probably
be slow on here this weekend, so I'll throw out what's going on at our house.

Public (government) school starts this coming Tuesday. Our plans, so far,
have been to keep EVERYONE out...our biological kids, our adopted son, our
foster kids. It would be the first time homeschooling for the last 3.

At the last minute, our foster boy's caseworker said, "No, they can't be
homeschooled until the adoption is final." The reasoning, I suspect, is that
because they are foster kids, if they are abused and not in school, no one would
know. Other reasoning I guess is liability,...if they don't learn anything, or
fall behind, the state could be held liable for not ensuring their continuing
education.

So now we will be a house divided, which I HATE....means I'll be getting up
at 6:00 am to get the boys on the bus, then wasting my evenings doing mindless
homework. I really, really dread this.

The only other thing I have been up against, is that my 12 yo daughter, who
was in public school last year, really wants to go back. She forgets the tears
and crying at having to get up so early, the agony of doing all that
homework, never being able to go anywhere (we have friends who sell their wares at
fairs and art shows and she had to decline going to many states and Canada
because of this.) My husband, believe it or not, has put his foot down and forbid
anyone from going back, because the attitudes and stress were unbearable to the
family, and whether they realize it or not, to the kids too.

The boys will be coming out of school soon enough, once their adoption is
final, probably a couple of months. But if anyone would like to offer
suggestions of easing my daughter back into homeschooling (which will be really
different because she has only been schooled at home, not unschooled) PLEASE send them
quickly my way. She was somewhat accepting and looking forward to a lot of
things until 2 of her public school friends came back from vacation and started
touting all the wonderful things going on this year and how much she will
miss out on.

My mom is coming to West Virginia for a month, and I am thinking of asking
her to take Kelsey back to Texas with her for a couple of weeks as a treat and
an eyeopener (she definately couldn't do that if she were in school) Any other
ideas?

Nancy B. in WV


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Norma

--- In [email protected], CelticFrau@a... wrote:
<>But if anyone would like to offer suggestions of easing my daughter
back into homeschooling (which will be really different because she
has only been schooled at home, not unschooled) PLEASE send them
quickly my way. She was somewhat accepting and looking forward to a
lot of things until 2 of her public school friends came back from
vacation and started touting all the wonderful things going on this
year and how much she will miss out on.<>

Nancy B.:

We've had several in our area dealing with this same issue this
year. Others have offered some good suggestions. Like finding out
what it is she feels she will be missing. In some cases it was stuff
like shopping for back-to-school clothes, or buying school supplies,
or getting to see friends. So the parents and child figured out ways
to fulfill those things without having to go back to school.

One parent had her child do a list of things they were upset about
missing at school, and things they would miss at home if they went
back to school, and they had a discussion, comparing everything, plus
coming up with some concrete ways to deal with the missed things,
like more ways to socialize with friends. Guess what? Sleeping in
won, hands down, and the child elected to stay home.

If they miss back-to-school shopping you can have them make up their
own list of back-to-school things they might like to go shopping
for: craft items, fabric to sew some clothes, books they have been
wanting to read, notebooks and pens and pencils and folders (all the
stuff they have on sale this time of year), a backpack. And maybe
she can plan some kind of special event to commemorate Not-Going-Back-
To-School. A picnic or special field trip, perhaps? We do an annual
trip to a corn maize for one of our favorite Not-Going-Back-To-School
events, for example. Some do a camping trip to a nearby park area.
She could then make it on a weekend and invite her friends, both
schooled and unschooled. We are doing that next weekend, with a
group campsite and reservations for the high and low ropes course,
too. The teens are really looking forward to this.

I'm sure others have lots of ideas, too.

Norma

Tia Leschke

>
> One parent had her child do a list of things they were upset about
> missing at school, and things they would miss at home if they went
> back to school, and they had a discussion, comparing everything, plus
> coming up with some concrete ways to deal with the missed things,
> like more ways to socialize with friends. Guess what? Sleeping in
> won, hands down, and the child elected to stay home.

Several good suggestions from Norma. Another thing is to point out that
many kids have always looked forward to the start of school. I always did.
It was a time of new beginnings, yet another chance to do well. Maybe I'd
get a good teacher (or teachrs) that year, and it would be more fun.
September has always felt more like new years than January for me. But the
reality sets in after a few weeks. Those same kids who are looking forward
to the start of school today are just as likely to be dreading Mondays soon.

One thing I told my son when he mentioned that this or that friend enjoyed
school was that the friend doesn't have a choice about whether to go to
school. He only has a choice as to whether or not to enjoy it. In that
case, he's smart to try to enjoy it. That doesn't necessarily mean he'd
like it if he had a choice about going.
Tia

"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety
deserve neither liberty nor safety." Ben Franklin
leschke@...

Gary & Lisa Williams

Hi all~
I lurk alot and post a little.
I just wanted to say that I had this happen with my daughter too. Her other
PS friends would beg me to "let her go!"..."let her go". And I think it
embarrassed my daughter because she knew she didn't want to go but then she
thought maybe she should want to go since they her begging on her behalf.
Part of my daughter even considering to go was to do the school shopping
thing.
So now we go and buy stuff around this time of year. Papers, pencils,
markers, cool sketch pads, books she wants to get. This year she saw a
crochet kit and bought that. I hate to see her under pressure and I don't
want her to think that something is "wrong" since she doesn't go.
By the way, on the third day of "school" her PS friends her moaning about
ridiculous amounts of homework...
:-), Lisa



From: "Norma" <tessimal@...>
Subject: Re: Gov school starting

If they miss back-to-school shopping you can have them make up their
own list of back-to-school things they might like to go shopping
for: craft items, fabric to sew some clothes, books they have been
wanting to read, notebooks and pens and pencils and folders (all the
stuff they have on sale this time of year), a backpack.

[email protected]

In a message dated 23/08/2003 06:23:06 Pacific Daylight Time,
CelticFrau@... writes:


> . She was somewhat accepting and looking forward to a lot of
> things until 2 of her public school friends came back from vacation and
> started
> touting all the wonderful things going on this year and how much she will
> miss out on.
>

Hey Nancy, why not sit with her and list all the things she will miss and
then list all the opportunities she will have. Might give her some food for
thought?
The other Nancy, in BC


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[email protected]

The best part of having August babies, is all the cool art stuff they get for
their birthdays! We love the 10 cent notebooks and the 25 cent crayons! Can
never have enough!

We went to the local fair this week. Walking thru the expo building, adults
felt compelled to talk *school* with my kids while giving them a free balloon.
When asked about going to school, Hannah said, we don't go to school. Oh,
the man says, you homeschool? No, she replies, actually we unschool. At his
confused look, she clarified, we don't *do* school. Another time, when asked
what grade she is in, she replied, If I went to school, I suppose I'd be a 2nd
grader. As if this were not entertaining enough, at the *No Drugs* booth, my
kids were quick to comment on the fact the woman was drinking coke and giving
out candy ... doesn't she know sugar and caffeine are drugs, Mom?? <beg>

Ah! A week away from peace and quiet! (in town, not at home!)

diana,
The wackiest widow westriver...
“Relationships are a prerequisite for producing results beyond ourselves.
They expand our imaginations to infinite possibilities that cannot exist in a
life of isolation." --Brian Koslow


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

drbar68

Hi Lisa,
I'm a lurker too, but your daughter sounds like mine. She went thru a period of wanting to go to school, and when I asked her why it was the lunchbox, backpack, lunch and recess! Now she's older she understands that she has a lot more "recess" than schooled kids and we just buy a new backpack and take advantage of the sales for the supplies. She hasn't asked in a long time.
Deb
----- Original Message -----
From: Gary & Lisa Williams
To: [email protected]
Sent: Saturday, August 23, 2003 5:53 PM
Subject: [Unschooling-Discussion] Re: Gov school starting


Hi all~
I lurk alot and post a little.
I just wanted to say that I had this happen with my daughter too. Her other
PS friends would beg me to "let her go!"..."let her go". And I think it
embarrassed my daughter because she knew she didn't want to go but then she
thought maybe she should want to go since they her begging on her behalf.
Part of my daughter even considering to go was to do the school shopping
thing.
So now we go and buy stuff around this time of year. Papers, pencils,
markers, cool sketch pads, books she wants to get. This year she saw a
crochet kit and bought that. I hate to see her under pressure and I don't
want her to think that something is "wrong" since she doesn't go.
By the way, on the third day of "school" her PS friends her moaning about
ridiculous amounts of homework...
:-), Lisa



From: "Norma" <tessimal@...>
Subject: Re: Gov school starting

If they miss back-to-school shopping you can have them make up their
own list of back-to-school things they might like to go shopping
for: craft items, fabric to sew some clothes, books they have been
wanting to read, notebooks and pens and pencils and folders (all the
stuff they have on sale this time of year), a backpack.



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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 8/23/2003 6:57:04 PM Eastern Standard Time,
glmnw@... writes:

> So now we go and buy stuff around this time of year. Papers, pencils,
> markers, cool sketch pads, books she wants to get. This year she saw a
> crochet kit and bought that. I hate to see her under pressure and I don't
> want her to think that something is "wrong" since she doesn't go.
>

Things are a little better today. We went to Walmart and I got her ears
pierced for her (which she's been wanting for a long time) and she picked out some
cool gel pens, some notebooks, stationary, etc. We agreed together we're
gonna come back in a few days when school has started and all the prices are
slashed. I promised her I'd do whatever it takes for her to get to see her old
friends from school. She's having a birthday party in a couple of weeks. Also,
for years we've been wanting to have a big Halloween party, so now we may do
that this year, especially since Halloween is on a Friday Night. She loves
planning stuff like that, sending invitations, decorating, etc. We might even
put together a haunted house!

Today in the car, I was talking about my ongoing problems with rashes on my
hand, and how I will probably quit gardening next year to prevent it, but
instead put my time into the sheep and goats, milking them and making butter,
cheese, etc. She perked up and said, "mommy, I know how to milk, I can help!"

So, I think we'll be OK. I think the first day of "school" we'll go to the
mall and exchange a couple of things, get some cool craft stuff, whatever she
wants (hey, since we're unschooling this year, I don't have to come up with
hundreds of dollars for curriculum!) and we'll eat out.

Nancy B.


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 8/23/2003 7:25:38 PM Eastern Standard Time,
LOWRIEK@... writes:

> Hey Nancy, why not sit with her and list all the things she will miss and
> then list all the opportunities she will have. Might give her some food for
> thought?
> The other Nancy, in BC
>

I think we will do this. Only I'd like to do it at our unschool friend's
house, so I can get their opinions too...I think it'd help for her to hear it
from someone besides me.

Nancy B. in WV


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

The Bucknums

<<<Ah! A week away from peace and quiet! (in town, not at home!)

diana,>>>
I so agree with you!! Yippy! I think of the commercial of the Dad in the office supply store dancing with the shopping cart looking completely ecstatic. He was shopping for school supplies for his moppy looking kids.

That was me when I entered the Staples store and asked the clerk why they were so busy(it was 2:00 on a Tuesday) She looked at me, and then at my four kids, and said (in a are you retarded? tone) "School starts next week" you could hear the "Duh" ringing in the air. I smiled and said "Oh Ya! Alex your friends will be back at school soon." Big smile on my face :-D The poor clerk looked so confused. Alex told her "We're going to the cabin at the lake for September" Thinking it would help her understand. He added "Well we waited to have our holidays for when my friends were stuck in school so they wouldn't miss me so much." She still didn't get it. "We homeschool so we're free to holiday when we want." She replied with a mystified "Oh. Yaw. Ok sure" and we walked off. Tee Hee. I get my kids to ourselves for the days, it's so grand.

So our days will be quieter here in town and the Lake will be empty of noisy freaky kids who act insane now that they are free for two months. Last year when we went there we had a few run ins with a gang of 7-9 yearolds that were reeking havoc in a big way. Very scary. It was like they had no idea how to think for themselves and so followed whatever nutty idea came to mind.

Sorry I'm ranting now. Ooops
Teresa in Canada



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