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I was just thinking about having folks over and how everyone's family is
different, does things differently, expects different "behavior"... And all of the
ressponses about Hiedi's situation.. how the kid will probably adjust his
behavior to fit in with her family.. And I realized how often my kids have to
adjust thier behavior when they are at someone elses house.

Even thier aunts, uncles, and cousins may do things differently than we
do. My sister "requires/makes" her kids pick up thier toys from one activity
before they go on to another one. So, when my kids are over there, they have to
do that too. They have the option of either playing by Judys rules, or not
going over to play with thier cousins. They don't like the pick up rule, but
they like playing with thier cousins a lot more than they dislike the rule.
Anna once had a friend whose family was fundamentalist Christian,and she had to
"fit in" thier family if she wanted to go over there. She really liked the
little girl and had a great time with her, but she didn't like all the chores
and rules and weird stuff thier mom made them do. She would complain, or
discuss her disappointment with me, about the stuff at Jessica's house. I always
told her.. "well, you dont HAVE to go over there, you can always say "no" you
dont want to come" I even gave her an out.. she could always say that I said
"no" and give some excuse about going somewhere or something. But, she
usually opted to go over to Jessicas house and just put up with the stuff. Well,
now that I think about it.. Jessica was over at our house a LOT more than
Anna was over at hers :-)

Teresa


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