"bad words" Was "Schedules and classes" Now - 7 is still lit...
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In a message dated 5/30/03 7:32:04 AM, grlynbl@... writes:
<< Your kid should get together with my kids.. They can REALLY let the
language
fly. LOL. But, I have not lost any friends over it. Mostly because my kids
only use foul language around thier immediate family. I think they curb
thier language in public because of going to school and getting conditioned
that
bad language is not acceptable. Anybody who is that offended by a kids
language is pretty shallow, if you ask me. >>
Because mine have always been able to at home, they don't seem to feel the
need to do it away. From when they were little, we reminded them there are
times and places for things, and that grandma's wasn't the place to even say
"poop" if they could remember to avoid it.
At the gaming shop there's a 25 cent fine or push-ups for swear words other
than "crap" (I think it is--there's one word they can say, and it's not "a
swear word"). Marty says he's had to pay a few quarters over it, but not many.
(He mentioned this because they're going to have a ten pushups per bad word
rule at the junior police academy.) Holly says that she's impressed that when
Kirby's running a kid's tournament, Pokemon or YuGiOh or whatever, that he
speaks very gently and never says bad words.
What I told mine is that I don't mind the words, but some people do, and so
they should be careful because deciding to use them all the time will cost them
socially with some people.
So mine were conditioned without school. <g>
I was having an exchange with another mom I've known since she was young and
single. She's homeschooling and has a mid-age-kid (13?) and a toddler. I was
recommending she watch Eddie Izzard's "Dress to Kill," but then I remembered
"the language," and we discussed that. They don't shelter their kids from
"the f-word" either.
My kids would know MUCH less than they know about things which have nothing
whatsoever to do with sex or meanness if I were to ban anything with bad
language.
Sandra
<< Your kid should get together with my kids.. They can REALLY let the
language
fly. LOL. But, I have not lost any friends over it. Mostly because my kids
only use foul language around thier immediate family. I think they curb
thier language in public because of going to school and getting conditioned
that
bad language is not acceptable. Anybody who is that offended by a kids
language is pretty shallow, if you ask me. >>
Because mine have always been able to at home, they don't seem to feel the
need to do it away. From when they were little, we reminded them there are
times and places for things, and that grandma's wasn't the place to even say
"poop" if they could remember to avoid it.
At the gaming shop there's a 25 cent fine or push-ups for swear words other
than "crap" (I think it is--there's one word they can say, and it's not "a
swear word"). Marty says he's had to pay a few quarters over it, but not many.
(He mentioned this because they're going to have a ten pushups per bad word
rule at the junior police academy.) Holly says that she's impressed that when
Kirby's running a kid's tournament, Pokemon or YuGiOh or whatever, that he
speaks very gently and never says bad words.
What I told mine is that I don't mind the words, but some people do, and so
they should be careful because deciding to use them all the time will cost them
socially with some people.
So mine were conditioned without school. <g>
I was having an exchange with another mom I've known since she was young and
single. She's homeschooling and has a mid-age-kid (13?) and a toddler. I was
recommending she watch Eddie Izzard's "Dress to Kill," but then I remembered
"the language," and we discussed that. They don't shelter their kids from
"the f-word" either.
My kids would know MUCH less than they know about things which have nothing
whatsoever to do with sex or meanness if I were to ban anything with bad
language.
Sandra
Pamela Sorooshian
Choosing the style of language we use, to fit the circumstances, is a
way of showing respect to the people around us.
I've told my kids:
Knowingly doing something that you are aware feels insulting to certain
people IS insulting those people.
Sometimes it is worth it, to make a point or for shock value to wake
them up or for other reasons, I'm sure. But, to just casually, for no
good reason, use language that you know is unsettling to someone else
is discourteous and uncaring. Doing anything that makes another person
uncomfortable or feel insulted should be done only for a good reason.
So what if it is "their problem?" If we have the ability, simply by
avoiding the use of certain words when they might be unappreciated, to
create more harmonious social situations and avoid offense, why not do
it?
-pam
way of showing respect to the people around us.
I've told my kids:
Knowingly doing something that you are aware feels insulting to certain
people IS insulting those people.
Sometimes it is worth it, to make a point or for shock value to wake
them up or for other reasons, I'm sure. But, to just casually, for no
good reason, use language that you know is unsettling to someone else
is discourteous and uncaring. Doing anything that makes another person
uncomfortable or feel insulted should be done only for a good reason.
So what if it is "their problem?" If we have the ability, simply by
avoiding the use of certain words when they might be unappreciated, to
create more harmonious social situations and avoid offense, why not do
it?
-pam
On Friday, May 30, 2003, at 08:17 AM, SandraDodd@... wrote:
> What I told mine is that I don't mind the words, but some people do,
> and so
> they should be careful because deciding to use them all the time will
> cost them
> socially with some people.
Shyrley
SandraDodd@... wrote:
calls anyone near a 'f***** b*****'
Bryn never swears, he doesn't like it and Heather does when she and I argue. But then so do I.
anyway. Sigh.
I have explained to him that it affects me and sometimes he'll agree and say he will stop but then the beserk rage descends and all rationality is lost. Red hair I think ;-)
they come across kissing etc in films they all hide and ask me to tell them when its finished :-)
We're off to see The Matrix Reloaded next week and I've been told there's a bit of bed activity at one point. No doubt my brood will be loudly saying 'yuck, thats gross' etc etc in the cinema.
Shyrley
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> Because mine have always been able to at home, they don't seem to feel theTo be honest, mine rarely swear. Its when they lose their tempers, especially the red-headed youngest that it comes out. When Rhodri loses it he cannot be approached or talked too or he lashes out and
> need to do it away. From when they were little, we reminded them there are
> times and places for things, and that grandma's wasn't the place to even say
> "poop" if they could remember to avoid it.
calls anyone near a 'f***** b*****'
Bryn never swears, he doesn't like it and Heather does when she and I argue. But then so do I.
> What I told mine is that I don't mind the words, but some people do, and soI explained this to Rhodri after the lost friends incidents but he said he didn't care. The fact that Bryn lost his best friend didn't concern him cos it wasn't his friend and he didn't like their house
> they should be careful because deciding to use them all the time will cost them
> socially with some people.
anyway. Sigh.
I have explained to him that it affects me and sometimes he'll agree and say he will stop but then the beserk rage descends and all rationality is lost. Red hair I think ;-)
>I don't censor anything, which certainly upsets a few people here. The kids tend to censor themselves - I explain if a film is scary or has lots of bonking and generally they choose not to see it. When
>
> So mine were conditioned without school. <g>
>
> I was having an exchange with another mom I've known since she was young and
> single. She's homeschooling and has a mid-age-kid (13?) and a toddler. I was
> recommending she watch Eddie Izzard's "Dress to Kill," but then I remembered
> "the language," and we discussed that. They don't shelter their kids from
> "the f-word" either.
>
they come across kissing etc in films they all hide and ask me to tell them when its finished :-)
We're off to see The Matrix Reloaded next week and I've been told there's a bit of bed activity at one point. No doubt my brood will be loudly saying 'yuck, thats gross' etc etc in the cinema.
Shyrley
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
zenmomma2kids
>> To be honest, mine rarely swear. Its when they lose their tempers,especially the red-headed youngest that it comes out. When Rhodri
loses it he cannot be approached or talked too or he lashes out and
calls anyone near a 'f***** b*****'>>
For me that would be the problem. It's that he's using his words to
hurt someone else by name calling. My kid could be saying "poopy
head" and I'd still stop and talk to him about it.
I make a BIG distiction about what society considers "bad" words and
what I do. My definition of "bad" is words that are intended to hurt,
be they colorful, shocking or the plain old boring variety.
It's not words, it's the intent. Remember the above words ('f*****
b*****') could be used in a fairly innocent sentence about one's
female dog copulating with the neighbor's studly mutt. <g>
Life is good.
~Mary
liza sabater
On Friday, May 30, 2003, at 14:10 America/New_York, zenmomma2kids wrote:
Same with gender distinctions. My two boys sometimes want to plunder my
make-up case so I have a stash of stuff for them. Up until recently
Evan would ask for lipstick when I was applying mine before going out
and would proudly wear it to the playground. I never said no because,
really, even the studliest of actors has to wear makeup at some point.
/ l i z a
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> It's not words, it's the intent. Remember the above words ('f*****HA!
> b*****') could be used in a fairly innocent sentence about one's
> female dog copulating with the neighbor's studly mutt. <g>
Same with gender distinctions. My two boys sometimes want to plunder my
make-up case so I have a stash of stuff for them. Up until recently
Evan would ask for lipstick when I was applying mine before going out
and would proudly wear it to the playground. I never said no because,
really, even the studliest of actors has to wear makeup at some point.
/ l i z a
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]