susan

hi,

i thought this was funny - i got it from our local group. i hope it makes you
laugh.

-susan
austin,tx
always have dessert first:)

> >From a San Diego Father who has identified 35 truths he learned from
> his children:
> > >>>
> 1. There is no such thing as childproofing your house.
> 2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with
> roller blades, they can ignite.
> 3. A 4-year-old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded
> restaurant.
> 4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan,the motor is not strong
> enough to rotate a 42-pound boy wearing pound puppy underwear and a
> Superman cape.
> 5. It is strong enough, however, to spread paint on all four walls of
> a 20'x20' room.
> 6. Baseballs make marks on ceilings.
> 7. When using the ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up
> several times before you get a hit.
> 8. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on.
> 9. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long ways.
> 10. The glass in windows (even double pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by
> a ceiling fan.
> 11. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh-oh", it is already too
> late.
> 12. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke----------lots of it.
> 13. A 6 year-old boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a
> 60-year old man says it can only be done in the movies.
> 14. A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.
> 15. If you use a waterbed as a home plate while wearing baseball
> shoes, it does not leak. It explodes.
> 16. A king-size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2,000 sq. ft
> house almost 4 inches deep.
> 17. Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year-old.
> 18. Duplos will not.
> 19. Play-Doh and microwave ovens should never be used in the same sentence.
> 20. Super Glue is forever.
> 21. MacGyver can teach us many things we don't want to know.
> 22. So can Tarzan.
> 23. No matter how much Jell-O you put in the pool, you still can't walk on
> water.
> 24. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
> 25. VCRs do not eject PB&J sandwiches, even though TV commercials show they
> do.
> 26. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
> 27. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
> 28. You probably don't want to know what that odor is.
> 29. Always look in the oven before you turn it on.
> 30. Plastic toys do not like ovens.
> 31. The fire department in San Diego has at least a 5-minute response.
> 32. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
> 33. It will, however, make cats dizzy.
> 34. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
> 35. A good sense of humor will get you through most problems in life.
> (....unfortunately, mostly in retrospect)
>
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Dearest Susan....
thank you, thank you, thank you....My DH is looking at me like I lost my
marbles..
ROFL,
Eileen

susan

hi eileen,

i'm so happy this struck a good nerve with you. humour really is key don't
you think:)
-susan
austin,tx

> From: jazballard@...
>
> Dearest Susan....
> thank you, thank you, thank you....My DH is looking at me like I lost my
> marbles..
> ROFL,
> Eileen