Ann

Sandra, When I tell my daughter she's "stuck with me" it's in the
context of we, her family, will not abandon her. No matter what. She's
come up with some rather interesting "Even if..." questions, and
sometimes that becomes a game, but it's also very very serious. With
her recent query into belief systems (swim team locker room discussions
with a "fundy" teammate has triggered a rash of conversations!) plus our
current health issues (my cancer recurrence/current chemo & DH's
upcoming major surgery), the "stuck with me" has expanded into
discussing what will/may happen after death does separate us. <sigh>
We've had some really amazing talks. Yes, including running, suicide,
murder, going to jail, heaven/hell/reincarnation/etc, how would I
feel/what would I do if she died, she'd like to live with Aunt P but
Aunt P's even older and what if she dies, wills & inheritance, oh my, on
and on. Addressing a lot of things, curiosity, security, laws, her
sib's trials growing up (one legal name change at 18) and my own (my
father died when I was 4), what it takes (& means) to earn a living...

Ann

<< He tested us unbelievably,...my husband (ex-marine) finally looked
him straight in his eyes, after a major
meltdown on son's part, and said, "get it all out, give us all you've
got, but you're not going anywhere. You're stuck with us." >>

I missed the original of this, but wanted to point out just on principle
that
kids are NOT stuck. They can run or they can kill themselves. I've
known
kids who've done both. Trapping and holding them too hard isn't
guaranteed
to raise them to adulthood.

Sandra


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