[email protected]

Hello all. My name is Wendy and I am the mother of an amazing and
incredible 11 year old boy. We are new to unschooling and I am extremely
nervous and intimidated. I have been lurking here for a few days in order to
get the feel of things.
My son went to public school for "K-3rd grade" and we've been
homeschooling ever since. He didn't have any particular problems in public
school. He got decent grades, no behavioral problems or anything like that.
I just felt like he was being forced think and live in a box. "Raise your
hand before you speak. No talking in the lunch room," etc. Originally, I
felt that I could do a much better job of teaching him at home. I felt that
one on one (he's an only child) attention would make him some sort of
motivated learner. I forgot that, as a child, I hated school and learning
and reading until I stumbled upon them quite be chance, on my own terms.
When I think back to that first year that we HSed, all I did was to
duplicate the "classroom" in the living room. I've gotten somewhat better
over the past few years, but recently (literally days ago) my son approached
me with the idea of unschooling. To be honest, I have wanted to try it from
the start, I just haven't been able to muster the courage or faith in either
of us to go for it. I'm ashamed to admit that, but it's true. Now, with a
lot of prayer and faith, we're "letting go." However, I'm still a nervous
wreck. I don't know why. I have never been a typical learner myself. I
hated school, failed miserably, mystified my parents (who could not
understand why I "tested" so high and performed so poorly), and eventually
latched on to my own interests and am now an avid reader, writer, learner,
liver, etc. Why can't I trust my son to do the same? I am really trying to
relax, but I could sure use some help and encouragement. I'm afraid he'll
never be motivated to pick up a book or look up something that he's
interested in. I worry that college will be out of his reach.
Okay. I'm ready for that encouragement now! Thanks for listening to
me rant a bit, or more that a bit :o)...

Wendy in FL


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 3/11/03 1:11:12 PM, wenrom31@... writes:

<< I'm afraid he'll
never be motivated to pick up a book or look up something that he's
interested in. >>

Do it for him and make it look fun!

There's more reading (sitting more still than this list does) and lots of
links here:

http://SandraDodd.com/unschooling

and also at www.unschooling.com

Depending on how you have your e-mail set, there might or might be links
below.

<A HREF="http://sandradodd.com/unschooling">UNSCHOOLING</A>

<A HREF="http://www.unschooling.com/">Unschooling.com</A>

Betsy

**To be honest, I have wanted to try it from
the start, I just haven't been able to muster the courage or faith in
either of us to go for it. I'm ashamed to admit that, but it's true.
Now, with a lot of prayer and faith, we're "letting go." However, I'm
still a nervous wreck. I don't know why. I have never been a typical
learner myself. I hated school, failed miserably, mystified my parents
(who could not understand why I "tested" so high and performed so
poorly), and eventually latched on to my own interests and am now an
avid reader, writer, learner, liver, etc. Why can't I trust my son to
do the same?**


Hi, Wendy --

Many of us have our nervous moments. Is there any way you could meet
some real unschooled kids? My son is almost 9 and has always been
unschooled. He has never filled out a math worksheet, and sometimes
this makes me nervous, but if you had a conversation with him about the
subject you would find that he knows a lot about math. He's proof to me
that the method works. He's also happy, creative, alert, and interested
in lots of things that school children tend to find repulsive.

My husband taught junior high school in badly run school in a poor
neighborhood last year. Believe me, from his stories I learned how hard
it is to make anyone learn something when they've made up their mind not
to learn. ("La la la, I'm not liiiissssttteeennnning")

Try to let go of the idea, if you have it, that it's possible to have an
education without "gaps". Also, try to get rid of the idea that there
is an appropriate sequence and speed for learning. If you can dump
these two ideas, and never measure your kid against school frameworks,
you can probably enjoy watching your child develop.

Also, try searching the unschooling.com message boards for the word
"deschooling". That may help you.

Betsy

mummyone24

--- In [email protected], wenrom31@a... wrote:

<<Hello all. My name is Wendy and I am the mother of an amazing and
incredible 11 year old boy.>>



Just remember this first sentence. What makes him so amazing and
incredible? School, your school at home or just because he is? I bet
it's the last one. In which case, how can he not be amazing and
incredible without schooling? It works and you have to believe that.
Read here, read books and just watch your son. Watch him closely and
see how he learns all the time. See how happy he will be and what he
finds fascinating. Soon the time will pass and you will know it works
for him. Just work on trusting him and yourself to let some time pass
so that you can see all of this.

Mary B

wldr104

Hi. I wanted to thank everyone who responded to my fears. You all
have been very encouraging and I can't tell you how much it's meant
to me. I am still a work in progress (and proud to say that I always
will be!), but I am really starting to relax and allow my son to get
in touch with his own goals and interests instead of trying to define
him based on what I think that he should be at any given age or
level, etc. Thanks again! This group is turning out to be a real
blessing.


Wendy in FL








--- In [email protected], wenrom31@a... wrote:
> Hello all. My name is Wendy and I am the mother of an
amazing and
> incredible 11 year old boy. We are new to unschooling and I am
extremely
> nervous and intimidated. I have been lurking here for a few days
in order to
> get the feel of things.
> My son went to public school for "K-3rd grade" and we've
been
> homeschooling ever since. He didn't have any particular problems
in public
> school. He got decent grades, no behavioral problems or anything
like that.
> I just felt like he was being forced think and live in a
box. "Raise your
> hand before you speak. No talking in the lunch room," etc.
Originally, I
> felt that I could do a much better job of teaching him at home. I
felt that
> one on one (he's an only child) attention would make him some sort
of
> motivated learner. I forgot that, as a child, I hated school and
learning
> and reading until I stumbled upon them quite be chance, on my own
terms.
> When I think back to that first year that we HSed, all I
did was to
> duplicate the "classroom" in the living room. I've gotten somewhat
better
> over the past few years, but recently (literally days ago) my son
approached
> me with the idea of unschooling. To be honest, I have wanted to
try it from
> the start, I just haven't been able to muster the courage or faith
in either
> of us to go for it. I'm ashamed to admit that, but it's true.
Now, with a
> lot of prayer and faith, we're "letting go." However, I'm still a
nervous
> wreck. I don't know why. I have never been a typical learner
myself. I
> hated school, failed miserably, mystified my parents (who could not
> understand why I "tested" so high and performed so poorly), and
eventually
> latched on to my own interests and am now an avid reader, writer,
learner,
> liver, etc. Why can't I trust my son to do the same? I am really
trying to
> relax, but I could sure use some help and encouragement. I'm
afraid he'll
> never be motivated to pick up a book or look up something that he's
> interested in. I worry that college will be out of his reach.
> Okay. I'm ready for that encouragement now! Thanks for
listening to
> me rant a bit, or more that a bit :o)...
>
> Wendy in FL
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]