[email protected]

In a message dated 2/4/03 8:38:58 AM, sheran@... writes:

<< She said that these
kids are worldly and that they shouldn't be exposed to looking at a
woman's breast. >>

"worldly?"

I nursed kids in public for many years and never exposed my breasts. Since
it's so easy and so possible, I wish women who do choose to unbutton and flop
out wouldn't pretend that it's a prejudice against breastfeeding and not
offense at their immodesty.

You don't need your whole boob hanging out in public for a baby to nurse.

If you lift up your shirt the shirt covers up the baby. Or you can put a
blanket over. If some of you shows, that's okay. If ALL of you shows,
that's rude.

Sandra

[email protected]

I did not practice extended nursing with my first two but am doing so with my son (now 9 mos old) and at home I am so NOT modest that I find it difficult to nurse in public. I do not wear nursing bras but rather just lift my bra and take my breast from the underside of my bra. This is a bit of a feat when trying to be discrete. And I am a very large breasted woman so that I think makes it more difficult to not "expose" myself. AND my son hates to have his head covered since we don't do that at home AT ALL! He will tug and pull at a cover and even at my shirt if I try to put it too close to his face. He is very much like a puppy when he nurses in that he has to have his hand directly on the skin of my breasts at all times and it is a fight if you try to keep his hands down and a blanket on.

Still I think people shouldn't pass judgements if they should catch a glimpse of a breast. I mean our world is so full of half naked women ALL the time and that is rarely criticized. So I don't think people are just offended at being immodest while breastfeeding. I think it is discomfort with the idea of breastfeeding, especially older children, especially older male children. Our society is just so "ugh" about this kind of stuff. Drives me nuts. And I disagree that if "too much" boob shows it is rude.

It kind of reminds me of the cigarette smoking debate. Where does a person's right to smoke end with another's right to breath fresh air. How is someone to say my child should not nurse in comfort just because someone else's "stuff" makes them uncomfortable by seeing him nurse.

I just wish I could feel more at ease in public about breastfeeding...but alas, our society has a long way to go.

Debra

> I nursed kids in public for many years and never exposed my breasts. Since
> it's so easy and so possible, I wish women who do choose to unbutton and flop
> out wouldn't pretend that it's a prejudice against breastfeeding and not
> offense at their immodesty.
>
> You don't need your whole boob hanging out in public for a baby to nurse.
>
> If you lift up your shirt the shirt covers up the baby. Or you can put a
> blanket over. If some of you shows, that's okay. If ALL
> of you shows,
> that's rude.
>
> Sandra

Tia Leschke

>
> You don't need your whole boob hanging out in public for a baby to
nurse.
>
> If you lift up your shirt the shirt covers up the baby. Or you can put a
> blanket over. If some of you shows, that's okay. If ALL of you shows,
> that's rude.

That works really well for a tiny baby. I had two who absolutely refused
the blanket over thing once they were 9 months or so. One used to insist on
pulling my shirt *all* the way up. I had to stop nursing that one in public
before I would have otherwise.
Tia

Mary Bianco

>From: debsusedbooks@...

<<I did not practice extended nursing with my first two but am doing so with
my son (now 9 mos old) and at home I am so NOT modest that I find it
difficult to nurse in public. I do not wear nursing bras but rather just
lift my bra and take my breast from the underside of my bra. This is a bit
of a feat when trying to be discrete. And I am a very large breasted woman
so that I think makes it more difficult to not "expose" myself. AND my son
hates to have his head covered since we don't do that at home AT ALL! He
will tug and pull at a cover and even at my shirt if I try to put it too
close to his face. He is very much like a puppy when he nurses in that he
has to have his hand directly on the skin of my breasts at all times and it
is a fight if you try to keep his hands down and a blanket on.>>


Gee now that I'm thinking of it.......my breasts are so small, maybe no one
ever even knew I was breastfeeding!!!! I actually found it a lot easier for
me to go from the top. My boobs are so high, I showed much skin going from
the bottom up.

Have you tried maybe using a sling when you nurse? Your son's head wouldn't
be covered but the majority of you would be. Kind of makes getting situated
easier and more discreet. Also maybe trying to put like a cloth diaper
draped from your shoulder down like a tent. It wouldn't exactly be covering
his head but covering you. Just some thoughts.

Mary B





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Tia Leschke

I was with you this far.
>
> It kind of reminds me of the cigarette smoking debate. Where does a
person's right to smoke end with another's right to breath fresh air. How
is someone to say my child should not nurse in comfort just because someone
else's "stuff" makes them uncomfortable by seeing him nurse.

I hope you're *not* saying that you equate nursing in public with smoking in
public, because the objection to smoking in public is not just someone
else's "stuff". I had trouble in smoky rooms when I *did* smoke. Now I
really can't stand it. It's a health issue. The objection to seeing
exposed breast tissue is not.
Tia

Patrick <[email protected]>

I am also very large breasted, and I pretty much avoided nursing in
public. I never had any luck with the traditional cradle hold, and I
always nursed at home with the football position and lots of pillows
to help out. It was just very difficult to get in a good position
discreetly. I always wondered if other women had this same problem.

-Christy (I'm new here)

--- In [email protected], "Mary Bianco"
<mummyone24@h...> wrote:
> >From: debsusedbooks@a...
>
> <<I did not practice extended nursing with my first two but am
doing so with
> my son (now 9 mos old) and at home I am so NOT modest that I find
it
> difficult to nurse in public. I do not wear nursing bras but
rather just
> lift my bra and take my breast from the underside of my bra. This
is a bit
> of a feat when trying to be discrete. And I am a very large
breasted woman
> so that I think makes it more difficult to not "expose" myself.
AND my son
> hates to have his head covered since we don't do that at home AT
ALL! He
> will tug and pull at a cover and even at my shirt if I try to put
it too
> close to his face. He is very much like a puppy when he nurses in
that he
> has to have his hand directly on the skin of my breasts at all
times and it
> is a fight if you try to keep his hands down and a blanket on.>>
>
>
> Gee now that I'm thinking of it.......my breasts are so small,
maybe no one
> ever even knew I was breastfeeding!!!! I actually found it a lot
easier for
> me to go from the top. My boobs are so high, I showed much skin
going from
> the bottom up.
>
> Have you tried maybe using a sling when you nurse? Your son's head
wouldn't
> be covered but the majority of you would be. Kind of makes getting
situated
> easier and more discreet. Also maybe trying to put like a cloth
diaper
> draped from your shoulder down like a tent. It wouldn't exactly be
covering
> his head but covering you. Just some thoughts.
>
> Mary B
>
>
>
>
>
> _________________________________________________________________
> Protect your PC - get McAfee.com VirusScan Online
> http://clinic.mcafee.com/clinic/ibuy/campaign.asp?cid=3963

[email protected]

In a message dated 2/4/03 3:35:21 PM Eastern Standard Time,
mummyone24@... writes:

> Have you tried maybe using a sling when you nurse

When you use a sling you can do about anything and nurse unnoticed. LOL.
Used that shopping a lot.
Pam G.


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 2/4/03 3:44:54 PM Eastern Standard Time,
unschooling1@... writes:


> I am also very large breasted, and I pretty much avoided nursing in
> public. I never had any luck with the traditional cradle hold, and I
> always nursed at home with the football position and lots of pillows
> to help out. It was just very difficult to get in a good position
> discreetly. I always wondered if other women had this same problem

I'll add a ME TOO.. Same problems, actually, I think I had even MORE problems
breastfeeding because I my "ampleness" It was just very difficult for me to
manuever. Really, lying down on my side was the easiest.... but thats not
very conducive to doing anything BUT nursing. Heck, if I tried to hoist those
puppies out in public.. I would probably have either gotten arrested or made
some good tips.. LOL. I was always soooo envious of these little ladies
hauling thier babies around nursing them while walking or even sitting at a
table.. out in public.. where ever.. and they were so discreet and it was not
such a "big production' lol no pun intended. Thier babies covered thier
breasts.. my breasts covered my babies.. I had such a difficult time nursing
Landon and Anna, I didnt even try with Ethan and JP.. I figured.. I got 2
little kids who(also) neede me .. I cant just "check out" and get settled to
nurse every couple of hours for 20 minutes or so. These big old boobies have
always had thier pros and cons.. LOL.. the breasffeeding challanges were
DEFINITELY a con..

Teresa


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Kelly Grimes

Hello all! New to group here. I have 3 kids,
ages2,4,and6. I was just lurking, but the
breastfeeding discussion cought my eye. I extended
nursed and tandem nursed all of my children. I am also
a large breasted woman. I did nurse my kids in public
and none of them liked being covered. I do not feel it
is rude to sit down on a bench in a grocery store or
wherever and nurse a child. It's not like your mooning
someone or flipping them off. even if your whole boob
is out, the baby's head covers it from view. Unless
someone is being really nosy, they won't see much
more.The only reason I feel it may be percieved as
rude is that it is no longer common in our culture.
When/if it becomes a mainsteam practice once again, I
doubt it will be considered rude. Bottle feeding in
public certainly isn't rude.People who find it
offensive have the power to turn their eyes somewhere
else.If you are feeling uncomfortable nursing an older
baby in public,that's a differrent story. If your
child is not nursing just for nutrion alone and is
older, you can always just tell them to wait,or that
you will nurse them in the car or at home. I hope this
helps.


=====
KELLY
mama to:
RAINY
PHOENIX
& TIA

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the_clevengers <[email protected]>

--- In [email protected], Tia Leschke <leschke@s...>
wrote:
> That works really well for a tiny baby. I had two who absolutely
refused
> the blanket over thing once they were 9 months or so. One used to
insist on
> pulling my shirt *all* the way up. I had to stop nursing that one
in public
> before I would have otherwise.

Neither of mine would ever have let me put a blanket over their head
while nursing either. While they were little, the sling worked great
for nursing. When bigger, I used nursing shirts or a t-shirt with a
button-up shirt over it and just did the best I could. After awhile,
you get used to it and most people don't ever guess that you're
nursing anyways. Then again, I nursed my 3.5 year old in a pizza
parlor today, I'm not real, real concerned with what other people
think, I guess :-). Most of the 3 and 4, and even some of the 5 and 6
year olds in our homeschool group are nursing, so it's pretty normal
to see bigger nursing kids anywhere we hang out. Of course, after
they're verbal, or even real verbal, it's a lot easier to get the
point across about keeping mommy's shirt down :-)

Ironically, only one person has ever said *anything* to me about
nursing in public, and that was when my youngest was an infant, and I
was nursing her in a sling, *and* I had a nursing shirt on.
Absolutely no skin was showing at all, nothing. I think people's
problems with nursing are less about skin and more about their own
hang-ups. There's more boob skin showing on a cover of Cosmo than
I've ever displayed in 6 years of nursing in public.

Blue Skies,
-Robin-

Have a Nice Day!

I was very large breasted after I had my kids. We're talking F and G cups.

I managed ok but my kids didn't mind the shirt down close to them (not over them, but close enough that the rest of me didn't show.

Kristen


----- Original Message -----
From: Patrick <unschooling1@...>
To: [email protected]
Sent: Tuesday, February 04, 2003 3:43 PM
Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] Re: public nursing


I am also very large breasted, and I pretty much avoided nursing in
public. I never had any luck with the traditional cradle hold, and I
always nursed at home with the football position and lots of pillows
to help out. It was just very difficult to get in a good position
discreetly. I always wondered if other women had this same problem.

-Christy (I'm new here)

--- In [email protected], "Mary Bianco"
<mummyone24@h...> wrote:
> >From: debsusedbooks@a...
>
> <<I did not practice extended nursing with my first two but am
doing so with
> my son (now 9 mos old) and at home I am so NOT modest that I find
it
> difficult to nurse in public. I do not wear nursing bras but
rather just
> lift my bra and take my breast from the underside of my bra. This
is a bit
> of a feat when trying to be discrete. And I am a very large
breasted woman
> so that I think makes it more difficult to not "expose" myself.
AND my son
> hates to have his head covered since we don't do that at home AT
ALL! He
> will tug and pull at a cover and even at my shirt if I try to put
it too
> close to his face. He is very much like a puppy when he nurses in
that he
> has to have his hand directly on the skin of my breasts at all
times and it
> is a fight if you try to keep his hands down and a blanket on.>>
>
>
> Gee now that I'm thinking of it.......my breasts are so small,
maybe no one
> ever even knew I was breastfeeding!!!! I actually found it a lot
easier for
> me to go from the top. My boobs are so high, I showed much skin
going from
> the bottom up.
>
> Have you tried maybe using a sling when you nurse? Your son's head
wouldn't
> be covered but the majority of you would be. Kind of makes getting
situated
> easier and more discreet. Also maybe trying to put like a cloth
diaper
> draped from your shoulder down like a tent. It wouldn't exactly be
covering
> his head but covering you. Just some thoughts.
>
> Mary B
>
>
>
>
>
> _________________________________________________________________
> Protect your PC - get McAfee.com VirusScan Online
> http://clinic.mcafee.com/clinic/ibuy/campaign.asp?cid=3963


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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

Mary,

You made me giggle......

Oh for me going from the top would be just as unsightly, I would REALLY look
exposed then...did I mention I am a 44DDD and that is non-pregnant,
non-nursing. My bras prepregnant are snug now. There really is no high or
low to boobs this big. Honestly, my partner says my boobs make my son's head
look very small in comparison.

I have tried a diaper or receiving blanket from the shoulder-he still tugs at
it. I find he is really too big (20 lbs and gosh knows how long but really
long-21 inches at birth)
to nurse in a sling. And to me it was akward even when he was smaller,
never could figure out how mom's nursed while baby was in the sling...maybe
again, it has to do with having such huge boobs. He really doesn't lay in a
sling anymore...when he is in it he is upright, either on my hip or facing me
sleeping on my chest or facing out as I watch tv or work on the computer.
But that is getting to be a challenge since now he wants to type with mommy.


I have wanted to try another type of sling though because right now I am
using the NoJo which I love but it has no tail to help with nursing. I am
afraid I won't like a sling without padding. I guess with the next one I
might try a different sling...I just need to get rid of one or two of the 4
NoJos I have in order to justify getting another sling.

But thanks for the tries and the laugh

Debra

> Gee now that I'm thinking of it.......my breasts are so small, maybe no one
> ever even knew I was breastfeeding!!!! I actually found it a lot easier for
>
> me to go from the top. My boobs are so high, I showed much skin going from
> the bottom up.
>
> Have you tried maybe using a sling when you nurse? Your son's head wouldn't
>
> be covered but the majority of you would be. Kind of makes getting situated
>
> easier and more discreet. Also maybe trying to put like a cloth diaper
> draped from your shoulder down like a tent. It wouldn't exactly be covering
>
> his head but covering you. Just some thoughts.
>
> Mary B



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

Welcome Christy, I'm new as well...so we have something in common. I guess
we are just destined to nursing at home and/or just struggling when it is
absolutely necessary to nurse in public. As I sit and think about the last
time I had to nurse in public I recall how in an uproar I felt, so paniced
just from the stuggle to stay covered and get him fed. Then glad the deed
was done and I could get dressed again...
Debra


> I am also very large breasted, and I pretty much avoided nursing in
> public. I never had any luck with the traditional cradle hold, and I
> always nursed at home with the football position and lots of pillows
> to help out. It was just very difficult to get in a good position
> discreetly. I always wondered if other women had this same problem.
>
> -Christy (I'm new here)



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

linda salb

I nursed for ten years straight. In all indigenous societies it is totally acceptable (there are more of them and it is a very old tradition. Our society has too many hang ups. I have never felt out of place or uneasy about nursing anywhere, I think ppl like when you can keep a baby quiet. I have also never been insulted even as i nursed into their 3 yrs. There is a reason creator made our bodies and that is their primary purpose, it is the cycle of life. Later breasts are used as a stimulant to procreat therefore circle is complete. I must say I have always been descreet because its my parenting. I do not advertise but the above is my point of view. BTW.....the world average age to nurse is 4.2 yrs.
Tia Leschke <leschke@...> wrote:I was with you this far.
>
> It kind of reminds me of the cigarette smoking debate. Where does a
person's right to smoke end with another's right to breath fresh air. How
is someone to say my child should not nurse in comfort just because someone
else's "stuff" makes them uncomfortable by seeing him nurse.

I hope you're *not* saying that you equate nursing in public with smoking in
public, because the objection to smoking in public is not just someone
else's "stuff". I had trouble in smoky rooms when I *did* smoke. Now I
really can't stand it. It's a health issue. The objection to seeing
exposed breast tissue is not.
Tia


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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

Tia,
I realize the health issue and that was not where I was going with the
smoking issue...it was more about the discomfort either would cause another
person. I mean if someone will go out of their way to come and say to a
woman, "How about taking that to the restroom" it must really be an issue for
them. Not justified but I guess real to them. I too am bothered by smoke in
public areas, although I never smoked. My parents did and they made a huge
deal out of the fact that they felt like their rights were being infringed on
by exclusively non-smoking places. Anyway...
Debra


> I was with you this far.
> >
> > It kind of reminds me of the cigarette smoking debate. Where does a
> person's right to smoke end with another's right to breath fresh air. How
> is someone to say my child should not nurse in comfort just because someone
> else's "stuff" makes them uncomfortable by seeing him nurse.
>
> I hope you're *not* saying that you equate nursing in public with smoking
> in
> public, because the objection to smoking in public is not just someone
> else's "stuff". I had trouble in smoky rooms when I *did* smoke. Now I
> really can't stand it. It's a health issue. The objection to seeing
> exposed breast tissue is not.
> Tia



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

linda salb

If someone had come all the way over and be offended (1st I would be covered) but i would say that is their problem, that person would never have been born if someone in his ancestry didnt nurse. EDUCATION EDUCATION EDUCATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT IS THE MOST NATURAL AND PURE ESSENCE OF A BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
debsusedbooks@... wrote:Tia,
I realize the health issue and that was not where I was going with the
smoking issue...it was more about the discomfort either would cause another
person. I mean if someone will go out of their way to come and say to a
woman, "How about taking that to the restroom" it must really be an issue for
them. Not justified but I guess real to them. I too am bothered by smoke in
public areas, although I never smoked. My parents did and they made a huge
deal out of the fact that they felt like their rights were being infringed on
by exclusively non-smoking places. Anyway...
Debra


> I was with you this far.
> >
> > It kind of reminds me of the cigarette smoking debate. Where does a
> person's right to smoke end with another's right to breath fresh air. How
> is someone to say my child should not nurse in comfort just because someone
> else's "stuff" makes them uncomfortable by seeing him nurse.
>
> I hope you're *not* saying that you equate nursing in public with smoking
> in
> public, because the objection to smoking in public is not just someone
> else's "stuff". I had trouble in smoky rooms when I *did* smoke. Now I
> really can't stand it. It's a health issue. The objection to seeing
> exposed breast tissue is not.
> Tia



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]


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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 2/4/03 5:50:01 PM, baref00tmamax3@... writes:

<< The only reason I feel it may be percieved as
rude is that it is no longer common in our culture.
When/if it becomes a mainsteam practice once again, I
doubt it will be considered rude. >>

It has never been common in western culture for a woman to have a fully
exposed breast.
It has never been common for women to feed babies in public.

We're in new territory.

It hasn't been that long ago that there weren't even many public restrooms
for women (like in office buildings) because they weren't expected to be out
in public.

The idea that there was a time when it was okay is baseless.

Sandra

Kelly Grimes

--- SandraDodd@... wrote:
>
> In a message dated 2/4/03 5:50:01 PM,
> baref00tmamax3@... writes:
>
> << The only reason I feel it may be percieved as
> rude is that it is no longer common in our culture.
> When/if it becomes a mainsteam practice once again,
> I
> doubt it will be considered rude. >>
>
> It has never been common in western culture for a
> woman to have a fully
> exposed breast.
> It has never been common for women to feed babies in
> public.
>
> We're in new territory.
>
> It hasn't been that long ago that there weren't even
> many public restrooms
> for women (like in office buildings) because they
> weren't expected to be out
> in public.
>
> The idea that there was a time when it was okay is
> baseless.
>
> Sandra
>
Not true
Art from impressionists in Europe has subjects of
women casually breastfeeding at a party or on a
wagon.I'm sure all colonial women did not run and hide
everytime their child had to nurse, although they were
usually at home. There is even evidence that early
schools used recess time for kg children to nurse.
Don't forget , bottle feeding is new. It was created
in the industrial age as a new product for working
mothers. It was rejected for a long time, but like
disposable diapers, eventualy became mainstream due to media.

=====
KELLY
mama to:
RAINY
PHOENIX
& TIA

__________________________________________________
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Kelly Grimes

--- debsusedbooks@... wrote:
>
> I find he is really too big (20 lbs and gosh
> knows how long but really
> long-21 inches at birth)
> to nurse in a sling. And to me it was akward even
> when he was smaller,
> never could figure out how mom's nursed while baby
> was in the sling...maybe
> again, it has to do with having such huge boobs.

I have 36 DD's and when my kids were siting and hip
riding in the sling, I would just slide them a little
forward to be on my front and lower the sling so they
could nurse. You don't get to use the sling itself as
a cover though, but the child's head and body will
mostly block the view. I had aparenting concepts sling
originally for my first two kids, but for my third I
got a baby bundler. It's great!

=====
KELLY
mama to:
RAINY
PHOENIX
& TIA

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[email protected]

<< Don't forget , bottle feeding is new. It was created
in the industrial age as a new product for working
mothers. >>

Artificial feeding is documented back to the Greeks.
There are American colonial cribs in museums with iron olders for artifical
feeding contraptions that used pigs' nipples.

There were pewter feeding cans in England and the U.S. both, in which "pap"
(milk and cereal) sat and wasn't even washed out.

There's a gravestone in the 17th century which bragged that a mother had
nursed her children herself. England. Where for a long time women had
wetnurses nurse their babies if they were of a certain rank and did NOT do it
themselves.

<<It was rejected for a long time, but like
disposable diapers, eventualy became mainstream due to media.>>

What media? Artificial feeding with rubber nipples was "scientific" before
television or radio came along.

I used to think it was a WWII and later thing myself, but when I started
reading about it I was appalled.

Women's history isn't much discussed or dispersed. And especially not when
it's shamefully embarrassing for the women.

-=-Art from impressionists in Europe has subjects of
women casually breastfeeding at a party or on a
wagon.-=-

There are tons of Renaissance paintings of Mary nursing Jesus, and in a few
of them it seems obvious the artist never actually saw a nursing baby. Lots
are realistic, but a few are... huh!?

Sandra

Cindy White

In a message dated Wed, 5 Feb 2003 11:06:54 -0800 (PST)

Kelly Grimes baref00tmamax3@... writes:



<<.I'm sure all colonial women did not run and hide everytime their
child had to nurse, although they were usually at home.>>



My grandmother, who was born in 1909, told stories in which she was not
allowed to be seen while she was pregnant. She remembers one time that
the local preacher came by unexpectedly and she was hurriedly sent into
the kitchen for fear she would be seen. My mother was born in 1926,
that's not that long ago. If a woman should be ashamed to be seen
pregnant, I can imagine that nursing in "mixed company" may have been
taboo also. Nursing in the company of other women was probably very
natural, but my grandmother was in a very agricultural, rural society so
I feel sure the women were rarely in "mixed company", except on Sunday.



Cindy



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