Julie Stauffer

Speaking as a psychologist, I think you should contact the "tester". At
least in Texas, what was done with your children is unethical. (Here, if
the child is not with their parents, we are required to have a notarized
note stating that the person with the children has the parents' permission
to have the kids tested.)

I would tell the psychologist that unless they want you to contact the State
Board of Psychologists, you want all the originals of the testing materials
NOW.

Julie

[email protected]

In a message dated 9/1/02 1:37:14 PM Central Daylight Time, jnjstau@...
writes:


> Speaking as a psychologist, I think you should contact the "tester". At
> least in Texas, what was done with your children is unethical. (Here, if
> the child is not with their parents, we are required to have a notarized
> note stating that the person with the children has the parents' permission
> to have the kids tested.)
>
> I would tell the psychologist that unless they want you to contact the State
> Board of Psychologists, you want all the originals of the testing materials
> NOW.
>
> Julie

We were at a family reunion today (my side of the family) and I spoke to my
cousin who is a lawyer. This is what he had to say about the situation. We
could get a restraining order against mommie dearest, we could compel her to
tell us who she took the kids to see, and we could possibly sue her for all
sorts of things including, but not limited to; misrepresentation, slander,
maleficence, psychological damage, and so on. The problem is that it costs
money, and its not like she has bundles. My cousin and I decided that it
isn't worth it to put a restraining order against her, it would just cause
strife amongst family that we do get along with, and it could, possibly, make
things between Darin and I difficult. We aren't going to sue her, because of
the a fore mentioned too much time and effort for too little result. My
cousin IS going to help me take her to court to compel her to tell us who she
took the children to see, and he says that she will probably tell us before
we ever get to court. And we are going to put a __ (I can't remember what it
is called?) order out to keep any test results from her, regardless if they
are good or bad. As for the psychiatrist, psychologist, therapist, LMSW or
whom ever she took the kids to, we are going to wait and see who it was, what
she told him, and exactly what tests were given.
Honestly, if she outright lied to him, and said something like she is their
legal guardian or something, then I can forgive and forget. To me it will be
enough to know that HE knows he was duped. IF, that is the case.
Anyway, my cousin and I are meeting at his office Tuesday and we are going to
try and straighten this all out with a phone call first. So thanks to you all
for your advice, and your rage too! <g> It really helped!
~Nancy


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

Good luck Nancy. I hope it all turns out well for you. And then you and the
family can get things back to normal!
God Bless,
Collette


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Joseph Fuerst

Maybe because my dh works with attorneys...but I think the idea of a good
letter from an attorney is often enough to convey a few messages....one
being that you have counsel and are not afraid to use it. This letter would
best be directed to the 'tester' who is likely some professional who will
get the message about the potential (legal) liability. Of course, you
still have the detective work of discovering who did the testing.
I wish you well in this!


> Speaking as a psychologist, I think you should contact the "tester". At
> least in Texas, what was done with your children is unethical. (Here, if
> the child is not with their parents, we are required to have a notarized
> note stating that the person with the children has the parents' permission
> to have the kids tested.)
>
> I would tell the psychologist that unless they want you to contact the
State
> Board of Psychologists, you want all the originals of the testing
materials
> NOW.
>
> Julie
>
>
>
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>

Pam Hartley

----------
>From: [email protected]
>To: [email protected]
>Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] Digest Number 2315
>Date: Sun, Sep 1, 2002, 8:59 PM
>

> My
> cousin IS going to help me take her to court to compel her to tell us who she
> took the children to see, and he says that she will probably tell us before
> we ever get to court. And we are going to put a __ (I can't remember what it
> is called?) order out to keep any test results from her, regardless if they
> are good or bad. As for the psychiatrist, psychologist, therapist, LMSW or
> whom ever she took the kids to, we are going to wait and see who it was, what
> she told him, and exactly what tests were given.
> Honestly, if she outright lied to him, and said something like she is their
> legal guardian or something, then I can forgive and forget. To me it will be
> enough to know that HE knows he was duped. IF, that is the case.
> Anyway, my cousin and I are meeting at his office Tuesday and we are going to
> try and straighten this all out with a phone call first. So thanks to you all
> for your advice, and your rage too! <g> It really helped!


Nancy, you're my hero! This sounds like a good solid plan for closure to me,
and IF the woman is trainable this might do it!

Pam

[email protected]

In a message dated 9/1/02 11:00:09 PM Central Daylight Time,
[email protected] writes:

<< Anyway, my cousin and I are meeting at his office Tuesday and we are going
to
try and straighten this all out with a phone call first. >>

I think this is a GREAT move Nancy!! I totally agree with you on not sueing,
that is above and beyond what would benefit everyone. But pursuing this
avenue is a great way to deal with a difficult situation (in my humble
opinion :)....
The MIL will know you aren't going to lay down and let her walk all over you,
your views and do whatever the H*** she wants to your kids behind your back.
I certainly don't think she has any right to the test results either.
Good for you for pursuing this in such a balanced way.

Ren

Liza Sabater

Nancy,

This sounds great!

As much as I like to vilify lawyers, isn't it great to have one in
the family? Makes a world of a difference. It's like having an envoy
from the Dark Side; but one you can trust :-)

Liza




>Anyway, my cousin and I are meeting at his office Tuesday and we are going to
>try and straighten this all out with a phone call first. So thanks to you all
>for your advice, and your rage too! <g> It really helped!
>~Nancy
>
>

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 9/2/02 9:56:54 AM Central Daylight Time,
starsuncloud@... writes:


> I think this is a GREAT move Nancy!! I totally agree with you on not sueing,
> that is above and beyond what would benefit everyone. But pursuing this
> avenue is a great way to deal with a difficult situation (in my humble
> opinion :)....
> The MIL will know you aren't going to lay down and let her walk all over
> you,
> your views and do whatever the H*** she wants to your kids behind your
> back.
> I certainly don't think she has any right to the test results either.
> Good for you for pursuing this in such a balanced way.
>
> Ren

Thank you Ren. I am glad we have decided to go this route too. I was a little
queasy about this whole thing, and really just wanted it to be over.
~Nancy


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Betsy

**
The MIL will know you aren't going to lay down and let her walk all over
you,
your views and do whatever the H*** she wants to your kids behind your
back.
I certainly don't think she has any right to the test results either.
Good for you for pursuing this in such a balanced way.**

Yeah, show her your bite! If she won't respect you for your character
and your convictions at least you can get her to respect your ferocity.

Betsy

Tia Leschke

>
>Thank you Ren. I am glad we have decided to go this route too. I was a little
>queasy about this whole thing, and really just wanted it to be over.

I think you're sending her a strong message by having the lawyer
involved. Does she know that the lawyer is a cousin? Even better if she
doesn't. If she thinks you're paying a lawyer, she'll be even more clear
that you mean business.
Tia, who really appreciates the MIL who disagrees with lots of what we do
but doesn't say anything.


No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
Eleanor Roosevelt
*********************************************
Tia Leschke
leschke@...
On Vancouver Island

[email protected]

In a message dated 9/2/02 1:02:01 PM Central Daylight Time,
leschke@... writes:


> I think you're sending her a strong message by having the lawyer
> involved. Does she know that the lawyer is a cousin? Even better if she
> doesn't. If she thinks you're paying a lawyer, she'll be even more clear
> that you mean business.
> Tia, who really appreciates the MIL who disagrees with lots of what we do
> but doesn't say anything.
>

No, she doesn't know my cousin is a lawyer. Why? Because she has never shown
an interest in my family at all. Never comes to anything I have invited her
to, never asks how anyone is doing... Oh well her loss.
~Nancy


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]