Luz Shosie and Ned Vare

on 8/12/02 6:50 PM, [email protected] at
[email protected] wrote:

>
> Message: 8
> Date: Mon, 12 Aug 2002 22:38:44 +0200
> From: Alan & Brenda Leonard <abtleo@...>
> Subject: Re: Ned's recent unschooling post
>
> Thanks Ned, for a post that was (mostly) about unschooling and (partly)
> tactful.

No one has ever accused me of being tactful before . . . :-)
>> There's not much to unschooling, really. Until a kid is about seven, it's
> parenting, anyway, it's not even un-anything.
>
> I mean the following question seriously, and I'm not being nasty. But
> what's so special about seven? Why 7? Why not 9 or 5 or 14?

C'mon, I said "about seven." I agree. Why any age, really. I agree that
unschooling begins as parents prepare to have a child, and continues for
life. Unschooling is another way, perhaps, of saying "self-governing."

"About seven" is when most children's cognitive senses are fairly well
coordinated with their physical abilities. I took a course in child
development in which it was told that many children simply are not able to
coordinate their eyes with their hands and their brains until they are about
8. Before that age, for instance, they might actually "write" by drawing in
small circular motions in one spot on a page because they have no concept of
what writing is for yet, but see it only as making marks on paper, and have
no real sense about reading yet, either. (Nature does not program those
skills into them, they need to be learned, or acquired through their
intellect)

The lesson was that many children are simply not physically capable of doing
"schoolwork" until their bodies catch up with their minds. The obvious
question comes to mind then is, Why do we put them in schools (now at 3 or 4
! !) and force them to do what many are physically incapable of doing, and,
incidentally but equally important, what most have no interest in or need
for? The answer is that those activities provide jobs for adults, and
baby-sitting for working parents. Evidence points to NO benefits for the
kids. Kids still need, at those early stages, to explore the world on their
own terms as much as possible. That means free play and interaction with as
little interference as possible.

Not long ago, this state (CT) considered school-age to be 6 - 17. I suppose
the reason was that most people used to believe that children did not need
schooling until they were physically and emotionally ready to do school
stuff. That has changed, unfortunately for many kids, because the kids have
not. Early schooling can damage them in two ways: it puts them in an
unnatural setting doing unnatural things, and it deprives them of what they
truly need in order to develop well.

When kids get to be about seven, they often find their own reasons to read,
write, and cipher. Those things help them get a life of their own -- some
independence -- they understand that those concepts are tools they can use,
and they are excited by what they can do with them. Conversely, if they
don't acquire those skills, their parents become anxious, and start fretting
and cajoling, even teaching. It takes an unusually relaxed parent (a
supremely confident unschooler) to simply wait until a child shows an
interest in reading and calculating, especially after the child reaches
"school-age".

I agree with you, Brenda, that there is no certain age that should
determine anything when it comes to child development. Age-grading is what
schools do entirely for the convenience and purposes of the school -- they
are cutting cookies, not educating individuals. Parents need simply to be
watchful, engaged - but not to an extreme, available to help in the way it
is requested - but not hovering, and with lots of assurances for the child
that s/he is OK exactly the way s/he is. Disney's key is providing exactly
that for people -- REASSURANCE.

Ned Vare
PS Brenda wrote:
>>But Ned, we ARE free. . . . Your son WAS free to educate himself.<<
Yes, true compared to some places, but as you know, I was referring to how
much freer we could be, and my question was, Can you imagine that?

The true slave is the one who is comfortable in his chains.