Lily James

I'm asking you because you're used to thinking outside the box, and I want
some different opinions from the ones I've been getting.

My son, age 27 months, is energetic. Spirited, some have called him. Hell on
wheels, say others. :) He very much lives to his own agenda -- didn't say a
single word in English until 18 months -- won't respond to anything if he's
engrossed in something -- refuses to communicate unless it's his idea --
etc. He's loving and responsive with me and with my husband, but with other
people he sometimes is charming and engaging, but mostly is aloof and looks
right through them. This includes grandparents, to their chagrin. I think he
has a delightful personality and I love just watching him when he's all
closed off from the world, doing his little thing.

So, the problem is that Benny has opposite reactions to things -- caffeine
makes him focus or go to sleep. Cough medicine makes him insanely hyper.
Uppers take him down, downers take him up. I don't know MUCH about this but
people are telling me I need to take him to a pediatrician and get him
"diagnosed" because he may have some sort of problem. I just don't feel that
he could possibly be any of these things (hyperactive, add, whatever)
because he has a very long attention span for something he is interested in,
very very long.

He's recently had some sleep pattern changes -- waking up at one am and
peacefully sitting in his bed reading to himself, or playing with whatever's
in his room. Going back to sleep at five or so. He's also gotten extremely
extremely obsessive about alphabet-related things. Like the Dr. Seuss ABC
book/video, which he must have many many times all the time (and it has to
be read exactly the same way every time). Like his sponge letters/magnet
letters, which he must put in order in ways that involve little rituals like
going from room to room, when he can't find one he goes crazy. He will type
the alphabet into the computer and then delete it up to 10 times in a row.
It's kind of TOO intense and weird. The only books he wants to look at are
alphabet/number books, the only videos are alphabet/number videos, etc. It's
all he thinks or talks about -- last night in the middle of the night the
first sound I heard out of the monitor when he woke up was "THE NUMBER
FOUR!" in a sonorous tone. ?????

What is going on with him? I *will not* allow some assembly line
pediatrician to stamp some label on him and hand me a prescription to fix
him -- I think he is just perfect. However, I worry that he's getting
stressed out with all these rituals he forces himself through and all this
repetition and "studying" -- he's only two ferchrissakes. And the thing with
the caffeine is worrying to my parents -- they are convinced there's
something wrong with him and that he needs ritalin. ??? Am I being stupid to
ignore this and just say HE IS FINE and press on? I mean, SHOULD I get him
looked at? The thought fills me with utter dread.

Love,
LILY

_________________________________________________________________
Send and receive Hotmail on your mobile device: http://mobile.msn.com

Camille Bauer

Lily wrote:
<<I don't know MUCH about this but
people are telling me I need to take him to a pediatrician and get him
"diagnosed" because he may have some sort of problem. >>

DON'T DO IT! Ok, really don't take him unless you really think something is going on with him.

and added:
<<(hyperactive, add, whatever)>>

I really hate these words, and their diagnoses. ADD... what does that mean? To me, conform to what *I (meaning school, adults, society) says is normal :P Blech!

Lily wrote:
<<I just don't feel that
he could possibly be any of these things because he has a very long attention span for something he is interested in,
very very long.>>

Your ds reminds me of my oldest, actually your entire post reminds me of things I have said before :) My oldest was/is spirited, but he has calmed down a lot since 2 :) I usually say that I was blessed with this child because he taught me SOOOO much!

then she asked:
<<they are convinced there's
something wrong with him and that he needs ritalin. ??? Am I being stupid to
ignore this and just say HE IS FINE and press on? I mean, SHOULD I get him
looked at? >>

No, I don't think you are being stupid at all! Again, if you really are concerned take him to see someone. Luckily I had a great ped (he was actually only a sub-ped ;( )who told me that because ds doesn't sit a whole lot, that school will be the first calling saying, He needs ritalin....

Just confirmed that unschooling for me, LOL!

CamilleGet more from the Web. FREE MSN Explorer download : http://explorer.msn.com


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

rumpleteasermom

--- In Unschooling-dotcom@y..., "Lily James" <glamatron@h...> wrote:
>
> What is going on with him? I *will not* allow some assembly line
> pediatrician to stamp some label on him and hand me a prescription
to fix
> him -- I think he is just perfect. However, I worry that he's
getting
> stressed out with all these rituals he forces himself through and
all this
> repetition and "studying" -- he's only two ferchrissakes. And the
thing with
> the caffeine is worrying to my parents -- they are convinced there's
> something wrong with him and that he needs ritalin. ??? Am I being
stupid to
> ignore this and just say HE IS FINE and press on? I mean, SHOULD I
get him
> looked at? The thought fills me with utter dread.
>
> Love,
> LILY

{{{{{LILY}}}}}

Okay, my first advice is to try not to worry. Whatever happens
happens and we deal with it and get through it and move on. Worrying
just makes it less fun.

My second advice is to go to the website that Kate sent the other day
for NIMH and read up on Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder and other
disorders. The better educated you are yourself, the more likely you
will obtain proper treatment if it is needed and avoid unnecessary
treatment by doctors who think drugs are always the answer.

My third advice is to tell the grandparents that LOTS of kids react
that way to caffeine. It is not an idication that they must be put on
ritalin (which is also a stimulant).

The only thing that concerns me about your son as you describe him is
this:

> I worry that he's getting stressed out with all these rituals he
> forces himself through and all this repetition and "studying"

If he is unhappy and frustrated with himeself, I would do something,
I'd be cautious and learn all I could first, but I would take him for
an evaluation. If he is not unhappy and you are not overly concerned
about his health, I would leave it be for a while and just keep
learning all I could.

I hope this helps you in some way, even if it is just helpful knowing
that others are going through similar things and you are not alone.
Wyndham is going in for an evaluation next week because his repetitive
behaviours are starting to bother him. I never took him before
because he was never concerned but now he is, so I am.

Bridget

Nora or Devereaux Cannon

It sounds to me like you are framing your observations of his
behavior according to the labels you think folks want to put on
him. A Mom can deny that anything is wrong - just like we can
delude ourselves that the lump in our breast isn't really there -
but most often a Mom knows if there is something wrong.

I think you identified 3 areas of possible concern (1)
differences in interpersonal reactions (2) paradoxical reactions
to common drugs (3) intense concentration, characterized as
ritualistic. Let me take on #2 first, because it is the most
objective - Kids are supposed to have paradoxical reaction to
common drugs. That's why Ritalin, a stimulant for adults, is
used to "slow down" hyperactive kids. The interpersonal
reactions may be driving the concerns being raised by others - as
in "Any normal kid would love me to pieces; if he doesn't there
must be something wrong." Taint necessarily so. Some kids are
more attached than others, or may have periods of being more self
conscious/detached from strangers. The ritualized behavior you
describe is harder to get a hold of, because the label itself
carries so much weight. Can you remember a time when he was
trying to learn something else - like first mastering walking or
using eating utensils? If he conquers new important tasks with a
single minded concentration you may be on the cusp of early
reading; you certainly have discovered something about his
learning style that will help you in offering new information
over the years. One thing to try, to see if the letters are a
compulsion or a fascination, is to do something different. Go to
a woodsy park and walk around looking at wild flowers - or go to
the zoo - or hit a kid's museum - find a train display -
something that he is likely to like, but that is not going to
trigger alphabet thoughts. See if he engages in a different
situation or if he dreadfully misses the letters. If he does,
wait a couple of weeks and try again with a different activity.

While early identification of some disabilities may make a world
of difference for some kids, misdiagnosis and early mislabeling
always makes a difference, typically a bad one.
----- Original Message -----
From: "Lily James" <glamatron@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Wednesday, April 17, 2002 2:32 PM
Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] I need help


| I'm asking you because you're used to thinking outside the box,
and I want
| some different opinions from the ones I've been getting.
|
| My son, age 27 months, is energetic. Spirited, some have called
him. Hell on
| wheels, say others. :) He very much lives to his own agenda --
didn't say a
| single word in English until 18 months -- won't respond to
anything if he's
| engrossed in something -- refuses to communicate unless it's
his idea --
| etc. He's loving and responsive with me and with my husband,
but with other
| people he sometimes is charming and engaging, but mostly is
aloof and looks
| right through them. This includes grandparents, to their
chagrin. I think he
| has a delightful personality and I love just watching him when
he's all
| closed off from the world, doing his little thing.
|
| So, the problem is that Benny has opposite reactions to
things -- caffeine
| makes him focus or go to sleep. Cough medicine makes him
insanely hyper.
| Uppers take him down, downers take him up. I don't know MUCH
about this but
| people are telling me I need to take him to a pediatrician and
get him
| "diagnosed" because he may have some sort of problem. I just
don't feel that
| he could possibly be any of these things (hyperactive, add,
whatever)
| because he has a very long attention span for something he is
interested in,
| very very long.
|
| He's recently had some sleep pattern changes -- waking up at
one am and
| peacefully sitting in his bed reading to himself, or playing
with whatever's
| in his room. Going back to sleep at five or so. He's also
gotten extremely
| extremely obsessive about alphabet-related things. Like the Dr.
Seuss ABC
| book/video, which he must have many many times all the time
(and it has to
| be read exactly the same way every time). Like his sponge
letters/magnet
| letters, which he must put in order in ways that involve little
rituals like
| going from room to room, when he can't find one he goes crazy.
He will type
| the alphabet into the computer and then delete it up to 10
times in a row.
| It's kind of TOO intense and weird. The only books he wants to
look at are
| alphabet/number books, the only videos are alphabet/number
videos, etc. It's
| all he thinks or talks about -- last night in the middle of the
night the
| first sound I heard out of the monitor when he woke up was "THE
NUMBER
| FOUR!" in a sonorous tone. ?????
|
| What is going on with him? I *will not* allow some assembly
line
| pediatrician to stamp some label on him and hand me a
prescription to fix
| him -- I think he is just perfect. However, I worry that he's
getting
| stressed out with all these rituals he forces himself through
and all this
| repetition and "studying" -- he's only two ferchrissakes. And
the thing with
| the caffeine is worrying to my parents -- they are convinced
there's
| something wrong with him and that he needs ritalin. ??? Am I
being stupid to
| ignore this and just say HE IS FINE and press on? I mean,
SHOULD I get him
| looked at? The thought fills me with utter dread.
|
| Love,
| LILY
|
|
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|
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|
|
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http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
|
|
|

Stephanie Elms

Well, I was going to keep quiet for a little while (I just joined yesterday) but your son sounds very much like the son of a good friend of mine, especially the intense focus (near obsession) when learning something new and the strong reactions to chemicals. Have you read "Raising Your Spirited Child: A Guide For Parents Whose Child is More *Intense *Sensitive *Perceptive *Persistent *Energetic" by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka? It was my friend's bible in the early years (her son is now 5).

MY friend also has a extremely informative website on spirited children:

http://www.nurturingourfamilies.com/spirited/index.html

Tons of reading and info on nurturing the spirit of these wonderful, intense children.

I hope that this helps...I will try to post an intro soon, my 2 yo just woke up and is sitting on my lap...not really conducive to typing fast lol!

Stephanie

Bonni Sollars

I worry that he's getting
stressed out with all these rituals he forces himself through and all
this
repetition and "studying" -- he's only two ferchrissakes...
my parents -- they are convinced there's
something wrong with him and that he needs ritalin. ??? Am I being stupid
to
ignore this and just say HE IS FINE and press on?

Lily, I remember being two and being just as fascinated with things like
your son. People used to say I was "retarded" because I didn't talk
until I was three. But when I talked, I talked like an adult. I can
remember listening to adult conversation and understanding every bit of
it when I was one and a half . I tuned people out to explore my
imagination. I was also fascinated with letters and words. When I
learned to read, I would read a book forwards and literally backwards
several times. It was fun for me. I also used to "obsess" over noises I
could make with my nose and mouth and throat. I would go for long
periods of time gazing at the patterns on linoleum and wallpaper and
ceilings with symmetrical patterns. I would make up songs and sing them
over and over again. My brother used to spend long periods of time
looking at himself in the mirror and making weird faces at himself. He
has a very good sense of humor. My brother is a genius. He used to be
obsessed with electrical parts. He knew how the truck motor worked when
he was four. When he was two, he would have a daily ritual of
disassembling our phonograph and tape recorder. We would scold him, so
he would reassemble them and they worked fine. I used to think, what a
strange kid, but now I know my step mom just unschooled him, letting him
explore his interests. As an older child, his bedroom floor was
literally covered with circuits and parts for circuits. He works for
Microsoft and is doing just fine. Maybe some would say I had ADD as a
child and others would say my brother was hyperactive.
You say he forces himself to do this. My son Rex was sort of like that
only in different things when he was young. For example, his shoelaces
had to be tied perfectly symmetrically. He would do them over and over
again, and squeal in frustration every time it wasn't. His toys had to
be in a certain order. He seemed like maybe he was hyperactive or
something, but the teachers always said they didn't think so because he
did have such a long attention span when it was something he liked. My
cousin was on ritalin as a child. When I mentioned it to her talking
about my son's behavior, she was very much passionately against it. She
said it ruined her childhood. She said we should just let children be
and they will turn out okay. I think you should keep giving him what he
wants-the opportunity to "repeat and study" and new things to explore.
Hey, that is how the brain learns things. At any rate, how does your
son's behavior hurt him. Since he is only two, I wouldn't worry about
it. There is no hurry. But then, I am not a doctor and am not qualified
to give medical advice. He sounds like he wants to read. Can he read?
I have a friend whose son taught himself to read at two asking her what
the words said in books as she was reading to him. Your son sounds like
he knows what he wants. Let him lead, I say.
Bonni

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

Does he seem extremely stressed to you, keeping in mind that the average two
year old can seem pretty stressed?

Do you worry about him on days when you don't have friends and family telling
you to worry?

If you think that having a diagnosis could help you to understand him better
and improve his life and yours, you have reason to have him evaluated.
Otherwise, tell the critics to hush.

If you're interested in doing some reading on autism spectrum disorders the
very best place on the web to start is at the Ooops.... Wrong Planet!
Syndrome website at http://www.isn.net/~jypsy/

Deborah in IL

[email protected]

In a message dated 4/18/2002 10:30:28 AM Pacific Daylight Time,
glamatron@... writes:


> I mean, SHOULD I get him
> looked at? The thought fills me with utter dread.

Do some reseasrch yourself - look at some of the websites about
obsessive-compulsive disorder in children, for example. Also look for sites
about "idiosyncratic" reactions to stimulants, etc.

I once read up on obsessive-compulsive disorder and one thing that really
struck me was that adults with it so often said that they wished their
parents had recognized it and dealt with it when they were children - that it
would have saved them many years of difficulty if their parents had admitted
there was something wrong and sought help for them as early as possible.

--pamS


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 4/18/02 11:30:31 AM, glamatron@... writes:

<< He will type
the alphabet into the computer and then delete it up to 10 times in a row.
It's kind of TOO intense and weird. >>

But if he's having fun, it's no different from a kid who draws the same
picture a hundred times, in notebooks, on napkins, whatever... At least
he's not using up paper!

<<Am I being stupid to
ignore this and just say HE IS FINE and press on? I mean, SHOULD I get him
looked at?>>

I wouldn't. He has the one big proving symptom of ADD, which is that uppers
slow him. You can have all the OTHER symptoms, but if they then give you
ritalin and and speeds you up more, they'll say it wasn't ADD.

If you know what you already know, maybe you could get him to like iced tea!
<bwg>
Or let him drink coffee. Or get the coffee-bean snacky stuff or something.

I can't imagine that use of caffeine could be more dangerous than a steady
"diet" of ritalin.

Others might already have said all this. I have a lot of mail in the box.
But since he's not in school, he's not disrupting a classroom. Since he's
not disrupting a classroom, and you can plan your day around his patterns,
and you're not personally upset by it, no problem requiring medication.

I would NOT get a diagnosis, and I would just tell the grandparents he'll
change as he gets older. I had one who avoided eye contact with new people
(including relatives, on the first few meetings), and in a way he still does.
His meeting of new people is more tentative than the other two kids', and if
the house gets crowded he'll find something to do in his room or outside for
a while, until he's recharged and comes back out.

Sandra

[email protected]

In a message dated 4/18/02 12:38:49 PM, dcannon@... writes:

<< That's why Ritalin, a stimulant for adults, is
used to "slow down" hyperactive kids. >>

There are adults on ritalin too. It's not just being a kid that makes
ritalin act as it does in some people.

If all stimulants slowed all kids down, coca cola would be a great bedtime
beverage for children.

Sandra

Julie Stauffer

Hi Lilly,

Your ds sounds amazingly bright. Occasionally, kids who are extremely
intelligent look "a little nuts" to others. I had a friend whose child was
breezing through 7th grade curriculums at 8 yo. This child was truly
different acting as a young child. She didn't sleep, banged her head, all
kinds of stuff.

If you have your son checked out and are not happy with what is recommended,
you might consider going to someone experienced with very gifted children.

Julie

rumpleteasermom

--- In Unschooling-dotcom@y..., SandraDodd@a... wrote:

> I would NOT get a diagnosis, and I would just tell the grandparents
he'll
> change as he gets older.

I might not worry at age 2 or 3 about getting a diagnosis, but if the
child is getting frustrated or upset with himself, even at that age,
I'd consider it. THAT is the one symptom I would never ignore or
brush off as normal. An unhappy child needs something and it is the
parent's job to find out what.

But the one thing I would definitely do, is educate myself about the
various disorders and their symptoms. That way you will be less
likely to get mistreated by the medical system.

Bridget

rumpleteasermom

--- In Unschooling-dotcom@y..., PSoroosh@a... wrote:

>
> I once read up on obsessive-compulsive disorder and one thing that
really
> struck me was that adults with it so often said that they wished
their
> parents had recognized it and dealt with it when they were children
- that it
> would have saved them many years of difficulty if their parents had
admitted
> there was something wrong and sought help for them as early as
possible.
>
> --pamS
>

Thank you for writing this. It makes me feel much better about taking
Wyndham into the nedical system now instead of waiting until he is
worse.

Bridget

Camille Bauer

An unhappy child needs something and it is the
parent's job to find out what.>>

She never said he was unhappy. I think you are throwing some of what you have dealt with onto someone else.

CamilleGet more from the Web. FREE MSN Explorer download : http://explorer.msn.com


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Tia Leschke

>An unhappy child needs something and it is the
>parent's job to find out what.>>
>
>She never said he was unhappy. I think you are throwing some of what you
>have dealt with onto someone else.

No, she *asked* if he was unhappy. She said that would be her criterion
for getting help at that age or not.
Tia

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
Eleanor Roosevelt
*********************************************
Tia Leschke
leschke@...
On Vancouver Island

Heather More

My sister's son is autistic spectrum and she has often commented on how
important it was to get him an early diagnosis since alot of intervention is
aimed at a young age.

Heather
----- Original Message -----
From: "rumpleteasermom" <rumpleteasermom@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Saturday, April 20, 2002 10:13 AM
Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] Re: I need help


> --- In Unschooling-dotcom@y..., PSoroosh@a... wrote:
>
> >
> > I once read up on obsessive-compulsive disorder and one thing that
> really
> > struck me was that adults with it so often said that they wished
> their
> > parents had recognized it and dealt with it when they were children
> - that it
> > would have saved them many years of difficulty if their parents had
> admitted
> > there was something wrong and sought help for them as early as
> possible.
> >
> > --pamS
> >
>
> Thank you for writing this. It makes me feel much better about taking
> Wyndham into the nedical system now instead of waiting until he is
> worse.
>
> Bridget
>
>
>
> ~~~ Don't forget! If you change the topic, change the subject line! ~~~
>
> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
> [email protected]
>
> Visit the Unschooling website:
> http://www.unschooling.com
>
>
>
> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
>
>

Fetteroll

on 4/20/02 4:03 PM, Tia Leschke at leschke@... wrote:

>> An unhappy child needs something and it is the
>> parent's job to find out what.>>
>>
>> She never said he was unhappy. I think you are throwing some of what you
>> have dealt with onto someone else.
>
> No, she *asked* if he was unhappy. She said that would be her criterion
> for getting help at that age or not.
> Tia

And on *that* note ... it doesn't help anyone understand more about
unschooling to banter over who has properly interpretted a post. I don't
think the goal is to offer as little advice as possible. The more the
better! And if one interpretation is off, it might help someone who is
reading.

*Lily* is undoubtedly the best interpretter of what she meant and can decide
which advice works for her and which doesn't. :-)

Joyce
Unschooling-dotcom moderator

[email protected]

<< An unhappy child needs something and it is the
parent's job to find out what.>>

<<She never said he was unhappy. I think you are throwing some of what you
have dealt with onto someone else. >>

It's highly likely that the person who made the statement about an unhappy
child was talking about any unhappy child, and not the particular child of
another person here. "Throwing some of what [we've] dealt with" is always a
part of discussions which involve personal experience.

If an answer comes that doesn't seem pertinent or useful, it's okay to just
let it slide by.

Sandra

Lynda

Have you read any book about diet such as the Feingold Diet? Some food
combination can literally cause kidlets to bounce off walls!

Lynda
----- Original Message -----
From: "Lily James" <glamatron@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Wednesday, April 17, 2002 12:32 PM
Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] I need help


> I'm asking you because you're used to thinking outside the box, and I want
> some different opinions from the ones I've been getting.
>
> My son, age 27 months, is energetic. Spirited, some have called him. Hell
on
> wheels, say others. :) He very much lives to his own agenda -- didn't say
a
> single word in English until 18 months -- won't respond to anything if
he's
> engrossed in something -- refuses to communicate unless it's his idea --
> etc. He's loving and responsive with me and with my husband, but with
other
> people he sometimes is charming and engaging, but mostly is aloof and
looks
> right through them. This includes grandparents, to their chagrin. I think
he
> has a delightful personality and I love just watching him when he's all
> closed off from the world, doing his little thing.
>
> So, the problem is that Benny has opposite reactions to things -- caffeine
> makes him focus or go to sleep. Cough medicine makes him insanely hyper.
> Uppers take him down, downers take him up. I don't know MUCH about this
but
> people are telling me I need to take him to a pediatrician and get him
> "diagnosed" because he may have some sort of problem. I just don't feel
that
> he could possibly be any of these things (hyperactive, add, whatever)
> because he has a very long attention span for something he is interested
in,
> very very long.
>
> He's recently had some sleep pattern changes -- waking up at one am and
> peacefully sitting in his bed reading to himself, or playing with
whatever's
> in his room. Going back to sleep at five or so. He's also gotten extremely
> extremely obsessive about alphabet-related things. Like the Dr. Seuss ABC
> book/video, which he must have many many times all the time (and it has to
> be read exactly the same way every time). Like his sponge letters/magnet
> letters, which he must put in order in ways that involve little rituals
like
> going from room to room, when he can't find one he goes crazy. He will
type
> the alphabet into the computer and then delete it up to 10 times in a row.
> It's kind of TOO intense and weird. The only books he wants to look at are
> alphabet/number books, the only videos are alphabet/number videos, etc.
It's
> all he thinks or talks about -- last night in the middle of the night the
> first sound I heard out of the monitor when he woke up was "THE NUMBER
> FOUR!" in a sonorous tone. ?????
>
> What is going on with him? I *will not* allow some assembly line
> pediatrician to stamp some label on him and hand me a prescription to fix
> him -- I think he is just perfect. However, I worry that he's getting
> stressed out with all these rituals he forces himself through and all this
> repetition and "studying" -- he's only two ferchrissakes. And the thing
with
> the caffeine is worrying to my parents -- they are convinced there's
> something wrong with him and that he needs ritalin. ??? Am I being stupid
to
> ignore this and just say HE IS FINE and press on? I mean, SHOULD I get him
> looked at? The thought fills me with utter dread.
>
> Love,
> LILY
>
> _________________________________________________________________
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>
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>
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>
>

Cheryl Jones

--- SandraDodd@... wrote:
>
> In a message dated 4/18/02 12:38:49 PM, dcannon@... writes:
>
> << That's why Ritalin, a stimulant for adults, is
> used to "slow down" hyperactive kids. >>
>
> There are adults on ritalin too. It's not just being a kid that makes
> ritalin act as it does in some people.
>
> If all stimulants slowed all kids down, coca cola would be a great bedtime
> beverage for children.
>
> Sandra
>

My understanding is that stimulants slow hyper people down because it
"stimulates" the neurons that inhibit response. That is, hyper people's
neurons fire slower which makes them more impulsive or distracted etc and then
the stimulant helps those thingies fire faster making them have more impulse
control.
Sorry my medical terminalogy is so inadequate.
Cheryl


__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Yahoo! Games - play chess, backgammon, pool and more
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Fetteroll

No one has a right to dictate *how* someone offers unschooling advice.

The purpose of this list is to help people become or be better at
unschooling. And the way people will go about helping others do that will
naturally reflect that purpose.

So *what* advice people give will always be naturally steered back in the
direction of unschooling because Unschooling Is The Purpose Of This List.

That doesn't mean anyone is wrong for doing what they feel is best. But the
list isn't for advice on doing what you feel is best, it's for advice on how
to unschool.

*Everyone* is welcome! :-) I hung out with the unschoolers long before I
became one just for the flow of ideas and new way of looking at things. But
it helps to keep the purpose of the list in mind.

If you're mad enough to spit bullets right now over something someone said,
go ahead and write the post to get it out of your system but send it to your
Drafts Folder. Or send it to me. Or send it to your best friend. Or your
worst enemy. Just *don't* send to the list until you can view the situation
without anger.

Joyce
Unschooling-dotcom moderator

rumpleteasermom

No, Camille, what I said was *IF* he is unhappy I'd worry. I'm not
there and can't assess his happiness, she is. And she did say one
thing that made me wonder if he is getting frustrated, she talked
about him stressing out over some of the things she talked about.
Which is why I said *IF*.

Bridget




--- In Unschooling-dotcom@y..., "Camille Bauer"
<goddessofwisdom2@h...> wrote:
> An unhappy child needs something and it is the
> parent's job to find out what.>>
>
> She never said he was unhappy. I think you are throwing some of what
you have dealt with onto someone else.
>
> CamilleGet more from the Web. FREE MSN Explorer download :
http://explorer.msn.com
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

rumpleteasermom

--- In Unschooling-dotcom@y..., "Lynda" <lurine@s...> wrote:
> Have you read any book about diet such as the Feingold Diet? Some
food
> combination can literally cause kidlets to bounce off walls!
>
> Lynda

Hey Lynda,

I poked about on Feingold's site a bit. I have a question maybe you
know the answer to and can save me the time hunting for . . .
Has anyone ever made a link between genetic predisposition to
addictive personality and genetic predisposition to allergies and
sensitivities?

Bridget

[email protected]

In a message dated 4/21/02 8:12:22 AM Central Daylight Time,
[email protected] writes:

<< Has anyone ever made a link between genetic predisposition to
addictive personality and genetic predisposition to allergies and
sensitivities? >>

Not trying to answer a post intended for someone else, but .....
I have heard of children labeled with ADD often having many, many allergies
and/or food sensitivities. So it seems there may be some kind of link with
that one?

Lynda

Anyone else watch "The Weakest Link?" Anne, the host is seen by different
folks as being funny or in-your-face or rude. However, that is part of the
show and everyone who participates knows what to expect, or should know what
to expect.

Without a disclaimer on this list, lots of folks aren't expecting
comments/responses that could be/have been called rude,
up-along-side-your-head or wake up calls.

Maybe along with angry responses going into the draft file for review, other
posts could go there to be reviewed for "how will other people see this" and
"is this a knee jerk reaction" and "maybe I should ask somemore questions
first to understand 'exactly' what this poster is saying."

There have been dozens of threads that errupted into "fights" that could
have been easily resolved if the draft folder had been used for the above as
well as the angry. There have been dozens of folks who left the list very
quickly who might not have had the above been used.

Just a thought on that draft folder.

Lynda
----- Original Message -----
From: "Fetteroll" <fetteroll@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Sunday, April 21, 2002 3:12 AM
Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] TIME OUT!


> No one has a right to dictate *how* someone offers unschooling advice.
>
> The purpose of this list is to help people become or be better at
> unschooling. And the way people will go about helping others do that will
> naturally reflect that purpose.
>
> So *what* advice people give will always be naturally steered back in the
> direction of unschooling because Unschooling Is The Purpose Of This List.
>
> That doesn't mean anyone is wrong for doing what they feel is best. But
the
> list isn't for advice on doing what you feel is best, it's for advice on
how
> to unschool.
>
> *Everyone* is welcome! :-) I hung out with the unschoolers long before I
> became one just for the flow of ideas and new way of looking at things.
But
> it helps to keep the purpose of the list in mind.
>
> If you're mad enough to spit bullets right now over something someone
said,
> go ahead and write the post to get it out of your system but send it to
your
> Drafts Folder. Or send it to me. Or send it to your best friend. Or your
> worst enemy. Just *don't* send to the list until you can view the
situation
> without anger.
>
> Joyce
> Unschooling-dotcom moderator
>
>
>
> ~~~ Don't forget! If you change the topic, change the subject line! ~~~
>
> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
> [email protected]
>
> Visit the Unschooling website:
> http://www.unschooling.com
>
>
>
> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
>
>

Cheryl Jones

--- rumpleteasermom <rumpleteasermom@...> wrote:
> --- In Unschooling-dotcom@y..., "Lynda" <lurine@s...> wrote:
> > Have you read any book about diet such as the Feingold Diet? Some
> food
> > combination can literally cause kidlets to bounce off walls!
> >
> > Lynda
>
> Hey Lynda,
>
> I poked about on Feingold's site a bit. I have a question maybe you
> know the answer to and can save me the time hunting for . . .
> Has anyone ever made a link between genetic predisposition to
> addictive personality and genetic predisposition to allergies and
> sensitivities?
>
> Bridget
>

Most doctor say that these things have genetic components. And I really can't
speak to genetic predisposition to allergies but wanted to point out that food
allergies do seem to run in families. Often it is only due to similar diets
and lifestyle. A lot of food allergies are caused by the digestive process
letting larger particles pass through the intestinal wall when it shouldn't.
Then the body treats these as invaders and begins the process to fight them
(allergies). Often when the leaky gut has been repaired, those foods no longer
cause allergic reaction. That has been our experience.
Cheryl

__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Yahoo! Games - play chess, backgammon, pool and more
http://games.yahoo.com/

joanna514

> There have been dozens of threads that errupted into "fights" that
could
> have been easily resolved if the draft folder had been used for the
above as
> well as the angry. There have been dozens of folks who left the
list very
> quickly who might not have had the above been used.
>
> Just a thought on that draft folder.
>
> Lynda

Of all the people that go off in a huff, I'm willing to bet there
are more coming closer to seeing what unschooling is.
I would never want any of the helpful posts to be "drafted" and
probably discarded eventually, because someone can't handle someones
opinion.
There have been a few people lately telling of leaving in a huff, or
almost leaving but sticking around because the words said, even
though they felt defensive, stuck with them.
Not everyone is going to like it. When people leave, it is their
loss(or not), but people do stay and gain many valuable insights. I
would hate for the passionate experiences unschoolers to not speak
their mind. Including you.
Joanna

Tia Leschke

>
>Of all the people that go off in a huff, I'm willing to bet there
>are more coming closer to seeing what unschooling is.
>I would never want any of the helpful posts to be "drafted" and
>probably discarded eventually, because someone can't handle someones
>opinion.

The thing is, if you draft them and let them "simmer" for a bit, you'll
probably know when you have another look whether they would be helpful or not.
Tia

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
Eleanor Roosevelt
*********************************************
Tia Leschke
leschke@...
On Vancouver Island

James Holley

Cheryl;

You inherit the allergic gene from your parents, but how it manifests
itself can be different. For example, you have hayfever and your
husband does not have allergies. Your child inherits the allergic gene
from you, but your child's allergies are to different foods, ie. eggs,
wheat, gluten, etc.

Stacy

Cheryl Jones wrote:
>
> --- rumpleteasermom <rumpleteasermom@...> wrote:
> > --- In Unschooling-dotcom@y..., "Lynda" <lurine@s...> wrote:
> > > Have you read any book about diet such as the Feingold Diet? Some
> > food
> > > combination can literally cause kidlets to bounce off walls!
> > >
> > > Lynda
> >
> > Hey Lynda,
> >
> > I poked about on Feingold's site a bit. I have a question maybe you
> > know the answer to and can save me the time hunting for . . .
> > Has anyone ever made a link between genetic predisposition to
> > addictive personality and genetic predisposition to allergies and
> > sensitivities?
> >
> > Bridget
> >
>
> Most doctor say that these things have genetic components. And I really can't
> speak to genetic predisposition to allergies but wanted to point out that food
> allergies do seem to run in families. Often it is only due to similar diets
> and lifestyle. A lot of food allergies are caused by the digestive process
> letting larger particles pass through the intestinal wall when it shouldn't.
> Then the body treats these as invaders and begins the process to fight them
> (allergies). Often when the leaky gut has been repaired, those foods no longer
> cause allergic reaction. That has been our experience.
> Cheryl
>
> __________________________________________________
> Do You Yahoo!?
> Yahoo! Games - play chess, backgammon, pool and more
> http://games.yahoo.com/
>
>
> ~~~ Don't forget! If you change the topic, change the subject line! ~~~
>
> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
> [email protected]
>
> Visit the Unschooling website:
> http://www.unschooling.com
>
>
>
> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/

--
==============================

James O. Holley
Ernst & Young
Litigation Advisory Services &
Computer Forensic Services
http://litigation.ey.com

Office: 703.747.1059
Fax: 703.747.0104
Pager: 888.620.5275
Pager email: 6205275@...

==============================

Lynda

they are tracing some food allergies to ethnic ancestry and as such they do
run in families. Other allergies are being traced to local with the family
members having simpy a predisposition to being sensitive.

We use to live in what some thought was the allergy capital of the world.
The local radio station and the newspaper use to tell you what to watch out
for each day!

My mother use to come visit and go home miserable. I finally asked one of
the docs why. I couldn't figure it out since they had the same allergens
where she lived. He said the difference was that her sinuses were so busy
fending off the smog where she lived that the allergens never really got
through to bother her. Then when she's come to visit us it was instant
allergy bomb.

Allergies are really strange to track and find out how they work. It was a
kidlet project a few years ago when they bought a microscope. You do NOT
want to know all the things they looked at with that thing. Yuck, yuck,
yuck!!!!

Lynda
----- Original Message -----
From: "Cheryl Jones" <cherylj30@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Sunday, April 21, 2002 4:56 PM
Subject: Re: [Unschooling-dotcom] Re: I need help


> --- rumpleteasermom <rumpleteasermom@...> wrote:
> > --- In Unschooling-dotcom@y..., "Lynda" <lurine@s...> wrote:
> > > Have you read any book about diet such as the Feingold Diet? Some
> > food
> > > combination can literally cause kidlets to bounce off walls!
> > >
> > > Lynda
> >
> > Hey Lynda,
> >
> > I poked about on Feingold's site a bit. I have a question maybe you
> > know the answer to and can save me the time hunting for . . .
> > Has anyone ever made a link between genetic predisposition to
> > addictive personality and genetic predisposition to allergies and
> > sensitivities?
> >
> > Bridget
> >
>
> Most doctor say that these things have genetic components. And I really
can't
> speak to genetic predisposition to allergies but wanted to point out that
food
> allergies do seem to run in families. Often it is only due to similar
diets
> and lifestyle. A lot of food allergies are caused by the digestive
process
> letting larger particles pass through the intestinal wall when it
shouldn't.
> Then the body treats these as invaders and begins the process to fight
them
> (allergies). Often when the leaky gut has been repaired, those foods no
longer
> cause allergic reaction. That has been our experience.
> Cheryl
>
> __________________________________________________
> Do You Yahoo!?
> Yahoo! Games - play chess, backgammon, pool and more
> http://games.yahoo.com/
>
>
> ~~~ Don't forget! If you change the topic, change the subject line! ~~~
>
> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
> [email protected]
>
> Visit the Unschooling website:
> http://www.unschooling.com
>
>
>
> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
>
>