Mary Hickman

Responding the the question, when did you get unschooling, I realized I have
always trusted my kids to learn what ever they needed to learn when, in the
acedemic sense. Curious kids seek answers and ask all kinds of question.
They see things fresh. Now I get the difference though, that I struggle
with. That of an unschooling lifestyle vs. unschooling academically. I'm the
notoreous TV poster. I'm trying to grapple with my fears that my son will be
deprived academically from hours zoning out on TV. In my heart I do trust he
will grow and learn and thrive. He is already. I guess I need
recommendations on parenting more than I ever need help understanding
unschooling. I find unschoolers wise parents so I cross topics and ask my
parenting questions. Is this ok with you all?

Last night my hubby and I had a yell match. Some neighbor called and the
police showed up. Feeling a little bitter and sad today, though me and kids
3 had a great craft/park date, cleaned the house together, helped eachother
cook lunch, and now we are seeing if we know how to use the record button on
the VCR. Tonight it is Brownies for dd7 and little league for ds5. My kids
gave me another taste test. I get blindfolded and they put all kinds of
food, spices, and other edibles on my tongue. They love this. I'm a brave
subject. We laugh alot, something hubby need to try more often.

Mary, who is confident unschooling and frustrated with parenting.



_________________________________________________________________
MSN Photos is the easiest way to share and print your photos:
http://photos.msn.com/support/worldwide.aspx

sharon childs

Mary,
I am sure that if you are concerned about being a good parent then you are a
good parent. A parent that loves their kids and honestly tries to do right
by them is almost always a good parent.

If you love your kids they will feel it and know it,,,always.

Sounds to me like you have a great relationship with them.

I am sorry you had a bad night last night and it is probably definately
effecting how you are feeling. I think you just need a big hug.

((((((((((((((((((((( H U G )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I hope that helps and it is okay on my part about parenting questions.
Parenting is a big part of unschooling I am sure. Anyway it is all for the
kids, and isn't that why we are here? For their best interests?
.·:*´¨`*:·..·:*´¨`*:·.
*: * Sharon * *
*·. .·*
`*·-:¦:-*´
³´`*:»§«:*´`³

----- Original Message -----
From: "Mary Hickman" <mfhick@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Tuesday, April 16, 2002 4:26 PM
Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] When I got it


> Responding the the question, when did you get unschooling, I realized I
have
> always trusted my kids to learn what ever they needed to learn when, in
the
> acedemic sense. Curious kids seek answers and ask all kinds of question.
> They see things fresh. Now I get the difference though, that I struggle
> with. That of an unschooling lifestyle vs. unschooling academically. I'm
the
> notoreous TV poster. I'm trying to grapple with my fears that my son will
be
> deprived academically from hours zoning out on TV. In my heart I do trust
he
> will grow and learn and thrive. He is already. I guess I need
> recommendations on parenting more than I ever need help understanding
> unschooling. I find unschoolers wise parents so I cross topics and ask my
> parenting questions. Is this ok with you all?
>
> Last night my hubby and I had a yell match. Some neighbor called and the
> police showed up. Feeling a little bitter and sad today, though me and
kids
> 3 had a great craft/park date, cleaned the house together, helped
eachother
> cook lunch, and now we are seeing if we know how to use the record button
on
> the VCR. Tonight it is Brownies for dd7 and little league for ds5. My
kids
> gave me another taste test. I get blindfolded and they put all kinds of
> food, spices, and other edibles on my tongue. They love this. I'm a brave
> subject. We laugh alot, something hubby need to try more often.
>
> Mary, who is confident unschooling and frustrated with parenting.
>
>
>
> _________________________________________________________________
> MSN Photos is the easiest way to share and print your photos:
> http://photos.msn.com/support/worldwide.aspx
>
>
>
> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
> [email protected]
>
> Visit the Unschooling website:
> http://www.unschooling.com
>
>
>
> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
>
>
>

Fetteroll

on 4/16/02 7:26 PM, Mary Hickman at mfhick@... wrote:

{{{{{Mary}}}}}

> I find unschoolers wise parents so I cross topics and ask my
> parenting questions. Is this ok with you all?

Perfectly okay. The advice I've gotten from unschoolers has made me a *much*
better parent than I would be. :-)

> Last night my hubby and I had a yell match.

A book that got recommended a number of times on the message board recently
was His Needs, Her Needs by William Harley.
(http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0800717880/qid=1019034203/sr=8-1/ref
=sr_8_3_1/103-7284670-7282235)

A few people were swearing by it. (I clicked on his name on the Amazon page
and he's written a number of books that get 4-5 out of 5 stars.)

Joyce

[email protected]

In a message dated 4/16/02 6:43:50 PM, mfhick@... writes:

<< I'm trying to grapple with my fears that my son will be
deprived academically from hours zoning out on TV. >>

I wish you could cheaply and easily come and watch TV with my kids a couple
of days. They're plenty expressive and talkative about what they're seeing.
I think they would still be learning if they weren't chatty, but the fact
that they are makes a big picture window into their learning.

The hours zoning out on TV won't deprive him academically if he's watching
things that interest him, with pictures of people, places, things which he
wouldn't have seen otherwise, with music and dancing and sports he wouldn't
have heard or seen otherwise, with costumes and equipment and animals and...

If he's encouraged and not shamed, TV will seem bigger and better, too.
Parental encouragement is all that makes the difference between a toddler
exploring a park or being a bad boy who left the playground. (Look! I've
slipped right into a parenting discussion without intending to!) When Kirby
was little he sat by me a lot. He wanted me to set him on the swings and
push him. He wanted me to watch him go down the slide. Marty wanted to go
far and climb high. So rather than telling him no, I would find older kids
to go with him and climb with him to help him down if necessary, or I would
follow behind him far enough that he had that feeling of being all alone in
the wide world, but he still wasn't out of sight of me. Too many mom's, when
they say "Don't go out of sight of me" mean "I'm going to sit right here and
not move, and so that limits your range of movement."

That limited range of movement can happen if a mom just wants to stay home
and not change any of her ways or beliefs or practices, too. And if watching
TV for four hours is as bad as climbing up a hill looking for wild
strawberries even though there was no way to get lost, but the kid is told
"bad" anyway, there is sorrow where there didn't need to be any.

Sandra

Fetteroll

There's never been an aha moment for me. It's just been a series of little
aha blips in my schoolish mindset. Being of an engineering bent, I adore
linear, step by step learning. I love the feedback that a textbook gives --
getting the right answer and having a physical indication of progress
through the book -- and the feeling of completeness.

The only thing that saved my daughter from having that foisted on her was
that I'd always wondered why learning in school had to be so dull. It was
satisfying in the sense of accomplishment it provided. But tedious. Watching
historical movies was fun and interesting. Reading history texts was sleep
inducing. (My mother thought the D in gym was amusing. "How was it even
possible to get a D in gym?" she wondered. ;-) And it *is* ridiculous. What
*really* is there to grade in gym? She didn't think D in history, the only
other D I ever got, was so amusing.)

So, even though I read everything I could on AOL's homeschooling boards
while my daughter attended preschool, I hung around with the unschoolers for
fun because *they* were having so much fun. Their ideas on learning were way
too fuzzy for me. No one was working towards a particular academic goal. It
was "just throw everything at the kids and see what comes out". Way too
unsettling for an engineer!

And yet the theories behind unschooling started to make sense. (Sandra and
PamS were especially helpful :-) And I found I could actually explain it to
others even when I wasn't sure I totally bought it myself. I did
intellectually but it was ripping my poor engineering heart out ;-) But I'm
also an artist -- an artist inhibited by engineering love of one right
answer -- so perhaps that part of my brain asserted itself and saved my
daughter from Calvert ;-)

Joyce