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In a message dated 9/21/99 11:37:53 AM, RRAINENJ@... writes:

<< "What can I do to make your day better?" >> what a great idea! it reminds
me of the daily 10+ second kiss idea-- and is similar in promoting spouses
reuniting each day...

i also love the "realizing unlovable behavior usually needs more love"
concept and often have to remind myself about that for my kids and myself,
too-- as well as my spouse.

i was thinking tami, since your children are older, what about calling a
"team meeting" with them and sharing that you are concerned about dad's
discontent and see if they have any creative suggestions-- they might be
willing to do a lot for dad. it is DAD, after all. and if it is approached
with a we-love-dad-&-respect-his-opinion-so-what-can-we-do-about-this
attitude, it might be well received.... (my oldest is only 9 so if am being a
bit too idyllic for teens, sorry! i would think as they are older they would
have some great ideas though!!)

your letter brings up a lot of issues... sounds like dad feels powerless
against the tide and just giving him rallied attn. might help.

erin

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In a message dated 9/21/99 3:20:27 PM Central Daylight Time, MORELFAM@...
writes:

<< was thinking tami, since your children are older, what about calling a
"team meeting" with them and sharing that you are concerned about dad's
discontent and see if they have any creative suggestions-- they might be
willing to do a lot for dad. it is DAD, after all >>


Erin,
That sounds good. Since dh and I have had our long talk tonight, I
think I will also have a long talk with the kids tomorrow. Since their dad
has agreen that we can all compromise and work with each other, I will get
some ideas from the kids on how we can help Dad feel better in this.
Thanks,
Tami