Re: That big socialization thing
Becky Wollenslegel
Okay everyone, ponder this. DS went to day camp for a week this summer at
the church wher I work. I was busy that week and not around much. The
woman I work with has reservations about this HS thing so she was watching
him pretty closly, thinking that he has to be missing something important
and how will he ever learn to get along with other kids. So after the week
she tells me she was really concerned about him because he didn't come in
and talk to her like the other kids. I say so what was he doing and she
says well he spent all his time with Zach (one of his PS friends) I say so
did Zach come in and talk to you? Well, no. so does that make you think
there is something "wrong" with Zach? Well, no - but that's different.
(Hmm - Why?)
So I told her that They really hadn't had much time together this summer and
they were just enjoying each other's company. And if Zach hadn't been there
I was sure he would have made friends with some other kids, (because he has
in similar situations) but he just didn't need to with Zach around. Seemed
like pretty independant behavior to me.
The really amazing thing was there was another boy their same age that they
tried to interact with. His mother was along for the week and he was a real
pain, hanging on her, arguing about where they were going to sit on the bus,
wanting all of her attention, etc and not interacting with the other kids at
all - but no one questioned his behavior. (Except his mom - he was making
her crazy) I can only imagine what the response would have been had I gone
along and my DS had acted like that. I wonder why people set up different
standards for homeschooled kids?
Anyone else experienced anything like that?
Becky in Ohio
the church wher I work. I was busy that week and not around much. The
woman I work with has reservations about this HS thing so she was watching
him pretty closly, thinking that he has to be missing something important
and how will he ever learn to get along with other kids. So after the week
she tells me she was really concerned about him because he didn't come in
and talk to her like the other kids. I say so what was he doing and she
says well he spent all his time with Zach (one of his PS friends) I say so
did Zach come in and talk to you? Well, no. so does that make you think
there is something "wrong" with Zach? Well, no - but that's different.
(Hmm - Why?)
So I told her that They really hadn't had much time together this summer and
they were just enjoying each other's company. And if Zach hadn't been there
I was sure he would have made friends with some other kids, (because he has
in similar situations) but he just didn't need to with Zach around. Seemed
like pretty independant behavior to me.
The really amazing thing was there was another boy their same age that they
tried to interact with. His mother was along for the week and he was a real
pain, hanging on her, arguing about where they were going to sit on the bus,
wanting all of her attention, etc and not interacting with the other kids at
all - but no one questioned his behavior. (Except his mom - he was making
her crazy) I can only imagine what the response would have been had I gone
along and my DS had acted like that. I wonder why people set up different
standards for homeschooled kids?
Anyone else experienced anything like that?
Becky in Ohio
[email protected]
In a message dated 9/8/99 7:26:09 PM Pacific Daylight Time,
beckycraigw12@... writes:
<< Anyone else experienced anything like that? >>
Yep everytime my 7yo tells his cousins to go home they are getting on his
nerves <g>...
Cousin's parents get irate when he does that at his grandma's house. Of
course it's because he's unsocialized, not because the cousin's parents drop
them off for three and four day stretches and disappear into the blue. We go
out there for a 4 day visit and have to deal with 6 other kids hanging
around. The 7 yo has about enough socialization in 2 days from them than he
wants all year. Course it's all his fault, he's unsocialized.... I'd
disagree and say the cousins are underparented.
Charlotte
beckycraigw12@... writes:
<< Anyone else experienced anything like that? >>
Yep everytime my 7yo tells his cousins to go home they are getting on his
nerves <g>...
Cousin's parents get irate when he does that at his grandma's house. Of
course it's because he's unsocialized, not because the cousin's parents drop
them off for three and four day stretches and disappear into the blue. We go
out there for a 4 day visit and have to deal with 6 other kids hanging
around. The 7 yo has about enough socialization in 2 days from them than he
wants all year. Course it's all his fault, he's unsocialized.... I'd
disagree and say the cousins are underparented.
Charlotte
[email protected]
In a message dated 09/08/1999 10:26:08 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
beckycraigw12@... writes:
<< I wonder why people set up different
standards for homeschooled kids?
Anyone else experienced anything like that? >>
Oh yes!!! I especially detest the ps moms who will say, "Let's play a math
game "...or spelling, or whatever, and then use it to "test" how much your
kid knows!!!! My dd can hold her own, but it makes me sooooo mad that the
moms do this only to hs/us kids, that I always jump in and say "Ooooh,
that'll be fun....I'll play too!!" Hehehe
Sam
beckycraigw12@... writes:
<< I wonder why people set up different
standards for homeschooled kids?
Anyone else experienced anything like that? >>
Oh yes!!! I especially detest the ps moms who will say, "Let's play a math
game "...or spelling, or whatever, and then use it to "test" how much your
kid knows!!!! My dd can hold her own, but it makes me sooooo mad that the
moms do this only to hs/us kids, that I always jump in and say "Ooooh,
that'll be fun....I'll play too!!" Hehehe
Sam
[email protected]
In a message dated 9/8/99 6:26:05 PM, beckycraigw12@... writes:
<<I wonder why people set up different
standards for homeschooled kids?
Anyone else experienced anything like that?>>
Yes, last time we visited the inlaws, my sister-in-law pounced on the fact
that James was shy and didn't say anything for the first 5-10 minutes after
we arrived. **Shouldn't he be going to Kindergarden this year so he can
learn to get over that?**
It seems obvious that she was watching him like a hawk, looking for any
excuse to bring up her suggestion that he should go to school.
Regarding your situation, I always figure that the kids who cluster around
the teacher-figure for attention aren't getting enough adult attention at
home. Your friend's judgement seems VERY biased.
Betsy
<<I wonder why people set up different
standards for homeschooled kids?
Anyone else experienced anything like that?>>
Yes, last time we visited the inlaws, my sister-in-law pounced on the fact
that James was shy and didn't say anything for the first 5-10 minutes after
we arrived. **Shouldn't he be going to Kindergarden this year so he can
learn to get over that?**
It seems obvious that she was watching him like a hawk, looking for any
excuse to bring up her suggestion that he should go to school.
Regarding your situation, I always figure that the kids who cluster around
the teacher-figure for attention aren't getting enough adult attention at
home. Your friend's judgement seems VERY biased.
Betsy
[email protected]
In a message dated 9/9/99 4:43:46 AM !!!First Boot!!!, Rhiahl@... writes:
<< Course it's all his fault, he's unsocialized.... I'd
disagree and say the cousins are underparented.
remember it when I'm good and ticked off at someone.
Hey, here's some good news on the hsing front. We finalized registration
(paid) for the kids' music lessons. This was our 2nd visit to the music
school. Between the 1st and 2nd visit the music teacher has pulled his
daughter out of ps and is hsing her! She will be there (along with another
hsed boy) when my kids are getting their lessons. And I feel like the
teahcer will be more understanding of where we are coming from. He seems
great anyway but this was the icing on the cake. And my husband got to meet
him and liked him too! He rarely gets to actually meet any of the people we
deal with during the day, so this was a nice plus for him.
Take care.
Nance
<< Course it's all his fault, he's unsocialized.... I'd
disagree and say the cousins are underparented.
>>Oh, I'm definitely going to have to quote you this time! Now if I can just
remember it when I'm good and ticked off at someone.
Hey, here's some good news on the hsing front. We finalized registration
(paid) for the kids' music lessons. This was our 2nd visit to the music
school. Between the 1st and 2nd visit the music teacher has pulled his
daughter out of ps and is hsing her! She will be there (along with another
hsed boy) when my kids are getting their lessons. And I feel like the
teahcer will be more understanding of where we are coming from. He seems
great anyway but this was the icing on the cake. And my husband got to meet
him and liked him too! He rarely gets to actually meet any of the people we
deal with during the day, so this was a nice plus for him.
Take care.
Nance
[email protected]
In a message dated 9/9/99 10:51:41 AM EST, Marbleface@... writes:
<< paid) for the kids' music lessons. This was our 2nd visit to the music
school. Between the 1st and 2nd visit >>
Nance,
I didn't know you were going to music school., must have been sleeping. My
guys go to music school too. oldest ds plays keyboard and guitar, youngest
plays guitar and will soon start keyboard, or bass or drums. They love the
school, all the teachers are young people and we have several hsers there
also. what will your kids be playing?
Teresa
<< paid) for the kids' music lessons. This was our 2nd visit to the music
school. Between the 1st and 2nd visit >>
Nance,
I didn't know you were going to music school., must have been sleeping. My
guys go to music school too. oldest ds plays keyboard and guitar, youngest
plays guitar and will soon start keyboard, or bass or drums. They love the
school, all the teachers are young people and we have several hsers there
also. what will your kids be playing?
Teresa
[email protected]
In a message dated 9/9/99 3:57:37 PM !!!First Boot!!!, Hsmotgo@... writes:
<< Nance,
I didn't know you were going to music school., must have been sleeping. My
guys go to music school too. oldest ds plays keyboard and guitar, youngest
plays guitar and will soon start keyboard, or bass or drums. They love the
school, all the teachers are young people and we have several hsers there
also. what will your kids be playing?
Teresa >>
Well, we are just starting. We have a piano at home so I guess we better
learn how to use it! Seriously, both the kids are interested in learning
more. How to read music and how to write their own songs. My daughter wants
to conduct and sing. Son wants to quickly move to another instrument --
guitar or trumpet. Where can I buy some ear plugs?? But the classes start
with the basics of reading music and keyboarding -- the teacher has all sorts
of electronic/computer pianos. He was very quick to tell me that he will be
getting a regular piano moved into the next room -- "so the kids don't think
this is what a real piano looks like." He seems very enthusiastic and fun.
He also repeated that "they can't just sit at the keyboard when they are so
young (4 and 6)" so he has lots of different instruments and activities for
them. They will be in groups of no more than 4, 1 or 2 times a week, we have
to get the final schedule still, but it will be 20 lessons over a semester
worked into everyone's schedule. Glad to hear your kids are enjoying the
music so much -- maybe we're doing the right thing!!
Nance
<< Nance,
I didn't know you were going to music school., must have been sleeping. My
guys go to music school too. oldest ds plays keyboard and guitar, youngest
plays guitar and will soon start keyboard, or bass or drums. They love the
school, all the teachers are young people and we have several hsers there
also. what will your kids be playing?
Teresa >>
Well, we are just starting. We have a piano at home so I guess we better
learn how to use it! Seriously, both the kids are interested in learning
more. How to read music and how to write their own songs. My daughter wants
to conduct and sing. Son wants to quickly move to another instrument --
guitar or trumpet. Where can I buy some ear plugs?? But the classes start
with the basics of reading music and keyboarding -- the teacher has all sorts
of electronic/computer pianos. He was very quick to tell me that he will be
getting a regular piano moved into the next room -- "so the kids don't think
this is what a real piano looks like." He seems very enthusiastic and fun.
He also repeated that "they can't just sit at the keyboard when they are so
young (4 and 6)" so he has lots of different instruments and activities for
them. They will be in groups of no more than 4, 1 or 2 times a week, we have
to get the final schedule still, but it will be 20 lessons over a semester
worked into everyone's schedule. Glad to hear your kids are enjoying the
music so much -- maybe we're doing the right thing!!
Nance
[email protected]
In a message dated 9/9/99 11:35:47 AM EST, Marbleface@... writes:
<< Glad to hear your kids are enjoying the
music so much -- maybe we're doing the right thing!! >>
They really are! We will be going into our 3rd year starting in Feb. The
boys love it, especially the big festival over memorial weekend. They get to
compete with 3 other schools, duets , solos and bands. It is a lot of fun.
They have learned a great deal and the school has become their social club!
Good luck,
Teresa
<< Glad to hear your kids are enjoying the
music so much -- maybe we're doing the right thing!! >>
They really are! We will be going into our 3rd year starting in Feb. The
boys love it, especially the big festival over memorial weekend. They get to
compete with 3 other schools, duets , solos and bands. It is a lot of fun.
They have learned a great deal and the school has become their social club!
Good luck,
Teresa
Jeff & Diane Gwirtz
> hehehe....that extended nursing gets blamed for just about everything. myThis was my son (now 13), right down to the living next door.
> older son is pretty clingy andfamily oriented (much more outgoing--he now
> has 4 friends whose houses he would go to for short periods) but he still
> wouldn't let me leave the park during soccer or leave the building where
> he has an art class. many people are convinced if he would totally wean
> he would ask to go to school , on over nights, to camp.....NOT ON HIS
> LIFE! he still claims he will live next door to me when he is married
> (which is an improvement. a few years ago, he was going to live next door
> to me, but come home to sleep in my bed at night)
>
Actually he and I were supposed to live next door. Daddy and his
sister could live here. I always heard that my kids were too clingy,
that I needed to leave them more, etc., etc., etc. Now my 19 year
old daughter lives on her own and my 13 year old son is spending this
week on a trip to D.C. with his grandparents - no hesitation, nada.
They grow up so fast - no need to push them away!
Diane from KS
jagwirtz@...
Jeff & Diane Gwirtz
> I burst into tears everytime I read "Love You Forever" by Robert Munsch. MyWe love this book too! My kids are older and we don't read it out
> children watch me carefully when I read it because they know the waterworks will
> start. It is too hard for me to read much.
>
loud anymore. In fact, I didn't know where it had gone. Then, we
got ready to paint our bedroom and wanted to move the bed. There,
under the mattress was the book. Dh had put it there because he
wanted it close by. Turns out the kids knew where it was all the
time. I was the only one in the dark.
Diane from KS
jagwirtz@...
Mary E Gates
My nearly 7 year old has never been to school and is very clingy. We
have periodically tried classes (gymnastics, VBS, & that sort) and after
literally peeling her off my leg I decided it wasn't worth it. So
personality could be a factor as well.
She does have some places she happily (ecstatically!) goes without me,
otherwise I would be quite worried about this. If it's not because we
hs, then it's my fault bc I breastfed her too long!
Mary Ellen
was a real pain, hanging on her, arguing about where they were going to
sit on the bus, wanting all of her attention, etc and not interacting
with the other kids at all - but no one questioned his behavior. (Except
his mom - he was making her crazy) I can only imagine what the response
would have been had I gone along and my DS had acted like that. I wonder
why people set up different standards for homeschooled kids?>>
___________________________________________________________________
Get the Internet just the way you want it.
Free software, free e-mail, and free Internet access for a month!
Try Juno Web: http://dl.www.juno.com/dynoget/tagj.
have periodically tried classes (gymnastics, VBS, & that sort) and after
literally peeling her off my leg I decided it wasn't worth it. So
personality could be a factor as well.
She does have some places she happily (ecstatically!) goes without me,
otherwise I would be quite worried about this. If it's not because we
hs, then it's my fault bc I breastfed her too long!
Mary Ellen
>>The really amazing thing was there was another boy their same age thatthey tried to interact with. His mother was along for the week and he
was a real pain, hanging on her, arguing about where they were going to
sit on the bus, wanting all of her attention, etc and not interacting
with the other kids at all - but no one questioned his behavior. (Except
his mom - he was making her crazy) I can only imagine what the response
would have been had I gone along and my DS had acted like that. I wonder
why people set up different standards for homeschooled kids?>>
___________________________________________________________________
Get the Internet just the way you want it.
Free software, free e-mail, and free Internet access for a month!
Try Juno Web: http://dl.www.juno.com/dynoget/tagj.
dawn
> otherwise I would be quite worried about this. If it's not because wehehehe....that extended nursing gets blamed for just about everything. my
> hs, then it's my fault bc I breastfed her too long!
older son is pretty clingy andfamily oriented (much more outgoing--he now
has 4 friends whose houses he would go to for short periods) but he still
wouldn't let me leave the park during soccer or leave the building where
he has an art class. many people are convinced if he would totally wean
he would ask to go to school , on over nights, to camp.....NOT ON HIS
LIFE! he still claims he will live next door to me when he is married
(which is an improvement. a few years ago, he was going to live next door
to me, but come home to sleep in my bed at night)
d h-s
[email protected]
In a message dated 99-09-09 22:05:07 EDT, you write:
<< he still claims he will live next door to me when he is married
(which is an improvement. a few years ago, he was going to live next door
to me, but come home to sleep in my bed at night)
d h-s
He said he didnt want me to have to get a ladder out (If you have read :Love
you forever" you will know what he means)
Rachael
<< he still claims he will live next door to me when he is married
(which is an improvement. a few years ago, he was going to live next door
to me, but come home to sleep in my bed at night)
d h-s
>>that is so cute! Mine said the same thing, ut it was the apartment upstairs.
He said he didnt want me to have to get a ladder out (If you have read :Love
you forever" you will know what he means)
Rachael
dawn
Love youforever, like you for always......
My son thinks the last time the mom rocks the man that the man nurses....
tell ya, he's out of touch with reality in some areas
dawn h-s
"Our eyes were originally right, but went wrong because of teachers."
--Zen proverb
My son thinks the last time the mom rocks the man that the man nurses....
tell ya, he's out of touch with reality in some areas
dawn h-s
"Our eyes were originally right, but went wrong because of teachers."
--Zen proverb
On Thu, 9 Sep 1999 Roop0625@... wrote:
> From: Roop0625@...
>
> In a message dated 99-09-09 22:05:07 EDT, you write:
>
> << he still claims he will live next door to me when he is married
> (which is an improvement. a few years ago, he was going to live next door
> to me, but come home to sleep in my bed at night)
>
> d h-s
> >>
> that is so cute! Mine said the same thing, ut it was the apartment upstairs.
> He said he didnt want me to have to get a ladder out (If you have read :Love
> you forever" you will know what he means)
> Rachael
>
> --------------------------- ONElist Sponsor ----------------------------
>
> Enter ONElist's Friends & Family Program
> WIN $100 to Amazon.com! Through Sept. 17. To enter, click here
> <a href=" http://clickme.onelist.com/ad/ff ">Click Here</a>
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> Check it out!
> http://www.unschooling.com
>
>
[email protected]
In a message dated 9/9/99 8:42:29 AM Pacific Daylight Time, ECSamHill@...
writes:
<< It seems obvious that she was watching him like a hawk, looking for any
excuse to bring up her suggestion that he should go to school.
their transparent attempt to find fault with my parenting because they don't
want to have to ask if they might be doing better or more. Grrrrrr!
I get the same thing because I won't spank. People look for my daughter to
do the slightest thing and pounce with "she needs to be spanked". It doesn't
help that she's so friendly, easy going and eager to please. It just seems
to bug them more.
LouisaM
writes:
<< It seems obvious that she was watching him like a hawk, looking for any
excuse to bring up her suggestion that he should go to school.
>>I run into this ALL the time!! I just wanna dress them down verbally for
their transparent attempt to find fault with my parenting because they don't
want to have to ask if they might be doing better or more. Grrrrrr!
I get the same thing because I won't spank. People look for my daughter to
do the slightest thing and pounce with "she needs to be spanked". It doesn't
help that she's so friendly, easy going and eager to please. It just seems
to bug them more.
LouisaM
[email protected]
In a message dated 99-09-09 22:22:08 EDT, you write:
<<
I get the same thing because I won't spank. People look for my daughter to
do the slightest thing and pounce with "she needs to be spanked". It
doesn't
help that she's so friendly, easy going and eager to please. It just seems
to bug them more.
LouisaM
is having wonderful kids!
Rachael
<<
I get the same thing because I won't spank. People look for my daughter to
do the slightest thing and pounce with "she needs to be spanked". It
doesn't
help that she's so friendly, easy going and eager to please. It just seems
to bug them more.
LouisaM
>>How does it go? "The best revenge is living well"? Maybe the best revenge
is having wonderful kids!
Rachael
[email protected]
In a message dated 9/9/99 7:30:19 PM Pacific Daylight Time, Roop0625@...
writes:
<< How does it go? "The best revenge is living well"? Maybe the best
revenge
is having wonderful kids!
Rachael >>
Hehehe! Actually she is a pretty good slap in the face for those who have
predicted I'll change my mind about all this as she get's older. She'll be 9
next month and it only gets easier and more fun.
Kris
writes:
<< How does it go? "The best revenge is living well"? Maybe the best
revenge
is having wonderful kids!
Rachael >>
Hehehe! Actually she is a pretty good slap in the face for those who have
predicted I'll change my mind about all this as she get's older. She'll be 9
next month and it only gets easier and more fun.
Kris
The O'Donnells
At 10:24 PM 9/8/99 -0400, you wrote:
kids were invited to a kids club meeting. Ten children showed up,
including my 2. We were the only hs kids in the lot. I never saw such an
unruly bunch in my life - no respect for the teacher at all. My kids just
sat or stood and looked at them. These kids couldn't/wouldn't sit still,
interrupted the teacher, argued with her, were mean to one another, etc. I
stood by watching and thinking to myself - Hmmm, so that is what ps
socialization gets you. Glad we hs!
Now really I know that these things are learned at home not at ps. But we
all know hs kids are compared to ps kids in socialization skills. Well,
why was it my two were the only ones who would line up when asked, listened
when asked, sat still, raised their hands when they needed to, etc. Sure
showed me that socialization is not a hsers problem at all if they teach
respect and orderliness.
In His Service,
Laraine
praxis@...
>From: "Becky Wollenslegel" <beckycraigw12@...>Well, not quite but recently we visited a church in our local area and the
>Anyone else experienced anything like that?
>
kids were invited to a kids club meeting. Ten children showed up,
including my 2. We were the only hs kids in the lot. I never saw such an
unruly bunch in my life - no respect for the teacher at all. My kids just
sat or stood and looked at them. These kids couldn't/wouldn't sit still,
interrupted the teacher, argued with her, were mean to one another, etc. I
stood by watching and thinking to myself - Hmmm, so that is what ps
socialization gets you. Glad we hs!
Now really I know that these things are learned at home not at ps. But we
all know hs kids are compared to ps kids in socialization skills. Well,
why was it my two were the only ones who would line up when asked, listened
when asked, sat still, raised their hands when they needed to, etc. Sure
showed me that socialization is not a hsers problem at all if they teach
respect and orderliness.
In His Service,
Laraine
praxis@...
Joel Hawthorne
I am very rushed right now but I want to raise "attachment" parenting as a
topic. In Vancouver, B.C. is a psychologist, Gordon Neufeld, who teaches
attachment parenting in workshops. He believes much "independence" that
people are so proud of in their children is actually displaced dependence
which winds up being dependence on peers. So you wind up with peer dependent
kids role modeling themselves after their peer group which is a highly
abnormal and dangerous state of affairs given that children don't really have
all they need to guide each other. Many of these kids appear very independent
but looks are deceiving.
So cherish the "clingyness" of your kids because it is a healthy
manifestation of adult identified kids. It is a normal characteristic of
children which should be treated with respect. Their fearfulness keeps them
where they need to be until they are truly ready to face the challenges of the
larger world.
Again someone commented on the way in which are culture concentrates on
separation from family as you grow older instead of seeing the family as an
ongoing entity with many generations which supports all of its members and
from which you never need to "separate" because it is a loving supportive
network..
The children in the world that are most at risk are not the least bit shy
around strangers and don't have that healthy amount of caution which keeps
them pointed in the right direction which is towards their parents.
Gotta run though I would love to go on a greater length. I am being
delinquent as it is.
dawn wrote:
best wishes
Joel
All children behave as well as they are treated. The Natural Child
Project http://naturalchild.com/home/
Work together to reinvent justice using methods that are fair; which conserve,
restore and even create harmony, equity and good will in society i.e.
restorative justice.
We are the prisoners of the prisoners we have taken - J. Clegg
http://www.cerj.org
topic. In Vancouver, B.C. is a psychologist, Gordon Neufeld, who teaches
attachment parenting in workshops. He believes much "independence" that
people are so proud of in their children is actually displaced dependence
which winds up being dependence on peers. So you wind up with peer dependent
kids role modeling themselves after their peer group which is a highly
abnormal and dangerous state of affairs given that children don't really have
all they need to guide each other. Many of these kids appear very independent
but looks are deceiving.
So cherish the "clingyness" of your kids because it is a healthy
manifestation of adult identified kids. It is a normal characteristic of
children which should be treated with respect. Their fearfulness keeps them
where they need to be until they are truly ready to face the challenges of the
larger world.
Again someone commented on the way in which are culture concentrates on
separation from family as you grow older instead of seeing the family as an
ongoing entity with many generations which supports all of its members and
from which you never need to "separate" because it is a loving supportive
network..
The children in the world that are most at risk are not the least bit shy
around strangers and don't have that healthy amount of caution which keeps
them pointed in the right direction which is towards their parents.
Gotta run though I would love to go on a greater length. I am being
delinquent as it is.
dawn wrote:
> From: dawn <dawn@...>--
>
> > otherwise I would be quite worried about this. If it's not because we
> > hs, then it's my fault bc I breastfed her too long!
>
> hehehe....that extended nursing gets blamed for just about everything. my
> older son is pretty clingy andfamily oriented (much more outgoing--he now
> has 4 friends whose houses he would go to for short periods) but he still
> wouldn't let me leave the park during soccer or leave the building where
> he has an art class. many people are convinced if he would totally wean
> he would ask to go to school , on over nights, to camp.....NOT ON HIS
> LIFE! he still claims he will live next door to me when he is married
> (which is an improvement. a few years ago, he was going to live next door
> to me, but come home to sleep in my bed at night)
>
> d h-s
>
> --------------------------- ONElist Sponsor ----------------------------
>
> WIN a trip to Hawaii!
> Enter ONElist's Hawaiian Sweepstakes. Go to:
> <a href=" http://clickme.onelist.com/ad/hawaii1 ">Click Here</a>
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> Check it out!
> http://www.unschooling.com
best wishes
Joel
All children behave as well as they are treated. The Natural Child
Project http://naturalchild.com/home/
Work together to reinvent justice using methods that are fair; which conserve,
restore and even create harmony, equity and good will in society i.e.
restorative justice.
We are the prisoners of the prisoners we have taken - J. Clegg
http://www.cerj.org
Joel Hawthorne
I burst into tears everytime I read "Love You Forever" by Robert Munsch. My
children watch me carefully when I read it because they know the waterworks will
start. It is too hard for me to read much.
Roop0625@... wrote:
best wishes
Joel
All children behave as well as they are treated. The Natural Child
Project http://naturalchild.com/home/
Work together to reinvent justice using methods that are fair; which conserve,
restore and even create harmony, equity and good will in society i.e. restorative
justice.
We are the prisoners of the prisoners we have taken - J. Clegg
http://www.cerj.org
children watch me carefully when I read it because they know the waterworks will
start. It is too hard for me to read much.
Roop0625@... wrote:
> From: Roop0625@...--
>
> In a message dated 99-09-09 22:05:07 EDT, you write:
>
> << he still claims he will live next door to me when he is married
> (which is an improvement. a few years ago, he was going to live next door
> to me, but come home to sleep in my bed at night)
>
> d h-s
> >>
> that is so cute! Mine said the same thing, ut it was the apartment upstairs.
> He said he didnt want me to have to get a ladder out (If you have read :Love
> you forever" you will know what he means)
> Rachael
>
> --------------------------- ONElist Sponsor ----------------------------
>
> Enter ONElist's Friends & Family Program
> WIN $100 to Amazon.com! Through Sept. 17. To enter, click here
> <a href=" http://clickme.onelist.com/ad/ff ">Click Here</a>
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> Check it out!
> http://www.unschooling.com
best wishes
Joel
All children behave as well as they are treated. The Natural Child
Project http://naturalchild.com/home/
Work together to reinvent justice using methods that are fair; which conserve,
restore and even create harmony, equity and good will in society i.e. restorative
justice.
We are the prisoners of the prisoners we have taken - J. Clegg
http://www.cerj.org
[email protected]
In a message dated 9/9/99 9:53:14 PM EST, jhawthorne@... writes:
<< He believes much "independence" that
people are so proud of in their children is actually displaced dependence
which winds up being dependence on peers. >>
That is just fascinating! I had never thought of it that way but it makes
good sense! Of course, it makes me feel much better too! Lol! thanks for that
insight, Joel.
Blessings, Lori in TX
<< He believes much "independence" that
people are so proud of in their children is actually displaced dependence
which winds up being dependence on peers. >>
That is just fascinating! I had never thought of it that way but it makes
good sense! Of course, it makes me feel much better too! Lol! thanks for that
insight, Joel.
Blessings, Lori in TX
[email protected]
In a message dated 9/9/99 6:53:14 PM, jhawthorne@... writes:
<<Gordon Neufeld, who teaches
attachment parenting in workshops. He believes much "independence" that
people are so proud of in their children is actually displaced dependence
which winds up being dependence on peers. So you wind up with peer dependent
kids role modeling themselves after their peer group which is a highly
abnormal and dangerous state of affairs given that children don't really have
all they need to guide each other. Many of these kids appear very independent
but looks are deceiving.>>
Thank you for posting this. This is a key to helping me understand something
that had been bugging me. In the last year I read the book _The Nurture
Assumption_, which analyzes a bunch of psychological studies and proves that
(when you look at large populations) almost all of a parents contribution to
their child's behavior is genetic. The variable that has the most impact on
how the kids turn out is the quality of the peer group the kids hang out
with. When this book was published, there was a big splash in the media
saying *parents don't count*.
What you had to say makes me see her ideas in a whole new light.
Betsy
<<Gordon Neufeld, who teaches
attachment parenting in workshops. He believes much "independence" that
people are so proud of in their children is actually displaced dependence
which winds up being dependence on peers. So you wind up with peer dependent
kids role modeling themselves after their peer group which is a highly
abnormal and dangerous state of affairs given that children don't really have
all they need to guide each other. Many of these kids appear very independent
but looks are deceiving.>>
Thank you for posting this. This is a key to helping me understand something
that had been bugging me. In the last year I read the book _The Nurture
Assumption_, which analyzes a bunch of psychological studies and proves that
(when you look at large populations) almost all of a parents contribution to
their child's behavior is genetic. The variable that has the most impact on
how the kids turn out is the quality of the peer group the kids hang out
with. When this book was published, there was a big splash in the media
saying *parents don't count*.
What you had to say makes me see her ideas in a whole new light.
Betsy
[email protected]
In a message dated 09/10/1999 8:33:06 AM Eastern Daylight Time,
praxis@... writes:
<< We were the only hs kids in the lot. I never saw such an
unruly bunch in my life - no respect for the teacher at all. >>
I remember when our unschoolers group went to a performance of "The
Nutcracker" which was specifically for school kids. That theatre was a mess
... except for the 2 rows of our kids....they were quiet and orderly because
they were unschooled, yes, but I also think they were quiet because they were
in shock!!! They all just sat there in amazement that kids would act like
that!!
Sam
praxis@... writes:
<< We were the only hs kids in the lot. I never saw such an
unruly bunch in my life - no respect for the teacher at all. >>
I remember when our unschoolers group went to a performance of "The
Nutcracker" which was specifically for school kids. That theatre was a mess
... except for the 2 rows of our kids....they were quiet and orderly because
they were unschooled, yes, but I also think they were quiet because they were
in shock!!! They all just sat there in amazement that kids would act like
that!!
Sam
Cathy Howard
At 09:07 AM 09/10/1999 -0400, you wrote:
because ours were the only children who were not wild!!!!! If I had not
seen the film on sound before I would have been lost. All the children but
ours were screaming and shouting so you could hardly hear.
Also I have found that my ds always gets compliments when we go to the
doctor or dentist or when he has had to go to the hospital for testing and
sickness. They always tell him and me what a sweet, polite and well
behaved child he is. They almost always think that hs has everything to do
with his behavior.
>From: Sam926@...Discovery this past spring. We must have been the only hs group there
>
>In a message dated 09/10/1999 8:33:06 AM Eastern Daylight Time,
>praxis@... writes:
>
><< We were the only hs kids in the lot. I never saw such an
> unruly bunch in my life - no respect for the teacher at all. >>
>
>We have had many similar experiences. Our homes school group went to Fort
because ours were the only children who were not wild!!!!! If I had not
seen the film on sound before I would have been lost. All the children but
ours were screaming and shouting so you could hardly hear.
Also I have found that my ds always gets compliments when we go to the
doctor or dentist or when he has had to go to the hospital for testing and
sickness. They always tell him and me what a sweet, polite and well
behaved child he is. They almost always think that hs has everything to do
with his behavior.