[email protected]

This is sort of off topic, not that that's new or anything :-), but with all
the talk of snobbery and doing things the 'right way', I wonder.

I don't anyone on here discussing the pure unschooling as any sort of Ms.
Superiority. In my short time here, I've sort of got the idea of what
unschooling is. And I really don't think it's a free for all. By that I mean,
it's not that parents get to do it however they see fit outside of the
curriculum confines. I think unschooling by definition means not to school a
child. Not even a little. It does sound extreme, but that's what it means to
me. And throwing any enforced 'format' into the mix changes it.
I love this concept, and believe in it completely. But I find it a somewhat
challenging road, mainly I think due to my own upbringing and current
environment. For someone to keep telling me when I veer off course, is
wonderful for me. I don't find it condascending, I find it eye opening. When
I get those cues, be it internal or external, I always have a choice.
Sometimes that choice is, well that sounds all wonderful and everything, that
may be fine for so-and-so, but not for us. And sometimes that choice is, wow,
that would be much better than what we're doing now. In my personal
experience, the former is usually a reluctance to change or give up something
that would allow a change.

There is a quote which I framed and put up in my living room, which I
detest....

"The downside to enlightenment no one ever mentions is that once you
understand how the Universe operates, you can't play dumb." Sarah Ban
Breathnach

This is not a specific reply to anyone, just a general thread I was reading...

Brenda


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 9/17/2001 5:34:27 AM Eastern Daylight Time,
brendaclaspell@... writes:


> But I find it a somewhat
> challenging road, mainly I think due to my own upbringing and current
> environment.


** I think a lot of us find a lot of hsing/unschooling challenging.

For someone to keep telling me when I veer off course, is

> wonderful for me. I don't find it condascending, I find it eye opening.


**This is where the rubber meets the road. I find it terribly condescending.
I don't need to be told that I have veered off course -- where was that
course again?? Maybe I like being off course every once in a while. Maybe
I'm on a different course. For a while. For a few minutes of the day. It's
up to me and mine. I have always despised being told what to do. A personal
failing I am sure.

So, I think that some people don't mind being led and guided and some of us
(me at least) object strenuously.



When

> I get those cues, be it internal or external, I always have a choice.
> Sometimes that choice is, well that sounds all wonderful and everything,
> that
> may be fine for so-and-so, but not for us. And sometimes that choice is,
> wow,
> that would be much better than what we're doing now.
>

**Exactly. Some days we can rise above the unsolicited advice or tone and
take what is useful to ourselves and move on. Some days we must respond.
Some days it is something actually useful.

In my personal
experience, the former is usually a reluctance to change or give up something
that would allow a change.

**Great insight into your own personal situation. If being led and guided
helps you this much, I can only applaud you learning process.

**But all of us are not cut from the same cloth. And will object when it is
appropriate. Some days with humor, some days not.

Nance




[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 9/17/01 9:40:14 AM US Eastern Standard Time,
marbleface@... writes:
>
>
> So, I think that some people don't mind being led and guided and some of us
> (me at least) object strenuously.
>
I cringe to think of myself as being led and guided, it's a blow to my ego.
(not that you at all intended that, it's just me :-)) I don't like to take
orders or have others guide my life. But I have to admit that at times there
are things others can see that I can't. This realization came to me very,
very, *very* slowly and reluctantly.
>
> **Exactly. Some days we can rise above the unsolicited advice or tone and
> take what is useful to ourselves and move on. Some days we must respond.
> Some days it is something actually useful.
>
I almost used the phrase unsolicited advice in my own post, but decided
against it. I can't really think of this forum under that term. This seems a
place for posting questions and offering support. I guess everyone may view
it differently, but I personally wouldn't put anything on here that I wasn't
comfortable debating/defending. Sure we shouldn't have to defend everything
we say, but if no one questioned anything, would that be helping or hurting?
And myself, if there's a parenting philosophy that I hold that I will not
discuss/debate, it's not something I believe in completely and am not ready
to look at it openly and honestly. So sure, sometimes I get irked that
someone brought it to my attention before I got there myself, but I'd rather
have it hard than not have it at all.

I'm certainly not trying to attack or direct this at anyone, I'm trying very
hard to just pull from my own thoughts and experience and share.

Brenda


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Sharon Rudd

A Guide doesn't force you to go any particular way any
more than a map does. The guide just has personality.
Sharon

> I cringe to think of myself as being led and
> guided, it's a blow to my ego.
> (not that you at all intended that, it's just me
> :-)) I don't like to take
> orders or have others guide my life. But I have to
> admit that at times there
> are things others can see that I can't. This
> realization came to me very,
> very, *very* slowly and reluctantly.


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