Janice Aquino

Hi,

This isn't my first post, but I won't go into details of my 8 year stint
as an unschooler to three kids, aged 13, 11, and 8. I have tried to
keep things light, and 'flowing' for quite some time now, but I have
noticed things flowing right out the window! There seems to be more
unschooling than 'unschooling' if you know what I mean, and while I realize
as the kids get older, especially the 13 year old who just 'became a
woman' two days ago, and an 11 year old boy who has more important things
to do, I feel somewhat frustrated by the lack of interest and sometimes
just plain laziness. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to get
us all back in the swing of things, and recharge our batteries somehow,
even though I know we all feel somewhat burned out at this point. I
feel so guilty when my husband comes home from work and asks, "How was
school?' and we look at him with blank stares and silence. I would really
appreciate anyone's advice on getting a handle on this problem before
it gets completely out of control. Thanks so much, and I'll be looking
forward to hearing from you. love, Janice

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Kerry Kibort

*I
feel so guilty when my husband comes home from work
and asks, "How was
school?' and we look at him with blank stares and
silence*
Tell him you dont go to school. I think that you need
to make dh aware of your philosophy. Things will be
much easier if you can talk honestly with your
partner. They are his kids, too, right?
As far as laziness, everyone here will tell you IT
WILL PASS! And, if it really bothers you, maybe you
could try to be a little lazy yourself. I've been
working on this, and I spent a whole day playing video
games with my kids this week. It was quite freeing!
Kerry

DiamondAir

From: "Janice Aquino" <janiceaquino@...>
>. I
>feel so guilty when my husband comes home from work and asks, "How was
>school?' and we look at him with blank stares and silence. I would really
>appreciate anyone's advice on getting a handle on this problem before
>it gets completely out of control. Thanks so much, and I'll be looking
>forward to hearing from you.


I'm having a hard time from your post grasping what exactly the problem is.
Do you feel like the kids aren't learning enough? That they aren't learning
the "right" things? Are they complaining that they're bored? Are you bored?

One of the things that helps us is that at the beginning of each month, we
peruse the local papers, calendars, homeschooling newsletter, etc. and write
out all the possible things that we might want to do on a giant wall
calendar. This might be a local folk dancing time, homeschool hour at the
roller-skating rink, story time at the library, a craft workshop, swimming
lessons, or whatever - those go up in one color (tentative things). We also
write up our regular things, like my swim team practice, our weekly
homeschoolers activities (we go to a regular open craft time and park/gym
day), those go up in another color because we know we're definitely going to
them. We add any holidays, doctor's appointments, etc. in and try to work
out any scheduling conflicts (like for activities where I need my husband to
have the kids with him). At this time, we discuss any potential activities
that anyone wants to do (new kinds of lessons or activities) and add those
if necessary. Then there is the normal stuff we do - gardening outdoors,
going to the library, etc. You might have a talk with your kids and see what
things they are interested in doing, or maybe present some things you think
might tickle their fancy. How about volunteer opportunities - these can be a
good free way to get involved and active in some area and your kids are old
enough to really participate in something like that.

As for the "How was school?" question, I personally would be tempted to
reply something like "life is learning, we're living, therefore we're
learning!". But I guess it depends on why your husband is asking. Is he not
bought into the whole unschooling concept? What are his specific worries?
Maybe you can do something like keeping a homeschool journal for a couple of
weeks so he can see what your daily activities are like. You can even
categorize them by what "subject area" they might fall under. Like "Biology:
spent 45 minutes birdwatching and categorizing birds"

And last but definitely not least - what are your own passions? Follow them,
pursue them, let your kids see how you go about doing things you're
interested in. Chances are they will find their own passions to pursue,
sooner or later.

Blue Skies!
-Robin-
Mom to Mackenzie (8/28/96) "I'm going to puff a bunch of hot air into the
atmosphere and then it will be spring!"
and Asa (10/5/99) the aspiring gymnast
http://www.geocities.com/the_clevengers Flying Clevenger Family