Re: [Unschooling-dotcom] new sibling was Extended nursing,
[email protected]
In a message dated 10/19/00 8:57:29 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
emersonsage@... writes:
<< She loves
her baby brother so much and is never mean or even crabby with him. But she
seems very angry with me. I understand that part of that is the adjustment
to not being the baby anymore. I wonder though if she isn't upset about not
nursing. We had a stop nursing party for her where she enjoyed telling us
how big she was. When we go to bed together at night she always wants to
cuddle and fondle my breasts. I ask her if she still wants to nurse and she
says sometimes. >>
My daughter weaned herself when I was three month pregnant. When her brother
come along she did great durning the first three month, but then she started
getting really angry and hitting me. Around six months the anger turning
towards her bother. When Matthew was born, and many months afterwards, I
still asked her if she would like to start nursing again. She tried twice,
and said "Yuck" but was really happy that I offered. In her mind, I think
she equated nursing with love, even though she wanted to be the really big
girl, a part of her wanted to still be the baby. I noticed that if I held
her as much as possible and as ofter as she wanted (as possible) even if I
didn't get last nights dishes done, or a shower until my hubby came home, she
was more happy and less aggressive.
If you haven't read "Siblings without Rivarly" it is an excellent book. In
the opening around pg 39, it talkes about how we would feel if our hubbys
said "Sweetheart, I love you sooooo much I have decided to have another wife"
then proceeds to spend almost all of his time taking care her.....hmmmm I am
feeling jealous and angry just in that statement alone but it goes on...and
on with common statements that we used with our older baby when we bring a
new baby in the house.
like this before. Any advice?>>
She may just want you to offer, she may not even take you up on the offer,
but don't count on it. Having two little ones can be overwhelming,
ecspecially when you have tons of other stuff to do....I think whether you
have 2 children or more the advice stays the same, when you add a new baby
get rid of everything extra you can, ask for more help from hubby or whoever,
and simplify, simplify, simplify......so the floor doesn't get washed this
week, spend that extra 10 minutes cuddling the older baby....you get the
idea....
I am new to unschooling and am still having some trouble with it. My
children have never been in school but we homeschooled in a fairly
traditional way.
Simplify, simplify.....even traditional schooling is flexible and can take
some "teacher "days off.....that is one of the joys of homeschooling....you
kids may love the free time to look for things that interest them....
Good Luck,
Happy Mothering,
Julie
Mommy to Ali and Matthew, Wife to a Great Man, Adam
Please check out a few of my favorite sites:
http://www.mothering.com
http://www.AttachmentParenting.org
http://www.LaLecheLeague.org
http://www.naturalchild.org
"It helps me to remember that people are more important than ideas and that
being kind is more important than being right."
-Peggy O'Mara, Publisher of Mothering Magazine.
emersonsage@... writes:
<< She loves
her baby brother so much and is never mean or even crabby with him. But she
seems very angry with me. I understand that part of that is the adjustment
to not being the baby anymore. I wonder though if she isn't upset about not
nursing. We had a stop nursing party for her where she enjoyed telling us
how big she was. When we go to bed together at night she always wants to
cuddle and fondle my breasts. I ask her if she still wants to nurse and she
says sometimes. >>
My daughter weaned herself when I was three month pregnant. When her brother
come along she did great durning the first three month, but then she started
getting really angry and hitting me. Around six months the anger turning
towards her bother. When Matthew was born, and many months afterwards, I
still asked her if she would like to start nursing again. She tried twice,
and said "Yuck" but was really happy that I offered. In her mind, I think
she equated nursing with love, even though she wanted to be the really big
girl, a part of her wanted to still be the baby. I noticed that if I held
her as much as possible and as ofter as she wanted (as possible) even if I
didn't get last nights dishes done, or a shower until my hubby came home, she
was more happy and less aggressive.
If you haven't read "Siblings without Rivarly" it is an excellent book. In
the opening around pg 39, it talkes about how we would feel if our hubbys
said "Sweetheart, I love you sooooo much I have decided to have another wife"
then proceeds to spend almost all of his time taking care her.....hmmmm I am
feeling jealous and angry just in that statement alone but it goes on...and
on with common statements that we used with our older baby when we bring a
new baby in the house.
>>I feel overwhelmed sometimes just withmy new son but it upsets me to see how angry she gets.She never acted out
like this before. Any advice?>>
She may just want you to offer, she may not even take you up on the offer,
but don't count on it. Having two little ones can be overwhelming,
ecspecially when you have tons of other stuff to do....I think whether you
have 2 children or more the advice stays the same, when you add a new baby
get rid of everything extra you can, ask for more help from hubby or whoever,
and simplify, simplify, simplify......so the floor doesn't get washed this
week, spend that extra 10 minutes cuddling the older baby....you get the
idea....
I am new to unschooling and am still having some trouble with it. My
children have never been in school but we homeschooled in a fairly
traditional way.
Simplify, simplify.....even traditional schooling is flexible and can take
some "teacher "days off.....that is one of the joys of homeschooling....you
kids may love the free time to look for things that interest them....
Good Luck,
Happy Mothering,
Julie
Mommy to Ali and Matthew, Wife to a Great Man, Adam
Please check out a few of my favorite sites:
http://www.mothering.com
http://www.AttachmentParenting.org
http://www.LaLecheLeague.org
http://www.naturalchild.org
"It helps me to remember that people are more important than ideas and that
being kind is more important than being right."
-Peggy O'Mara, Publisher of Mothering Magazine.
uebinger robyn
Thank you all for the great advice. It is so great to know that someone is
out there. I have one question. Why isn't simplifying simple?
Thanks again. You made my week.
sincerely and with great appreciation,
Robyn (mom to Ashton,Given,Sage, and Emerson)
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out there. I have one question. Why isn't simplifying simple?
Thanks again. You made my week.
sincerely and with great appreciation,
Robyn (mom to Ashton,Given,Sage, and Emerson)
>From: Jaam1224@..._________________________________________________________________________
>Reply-To: [email protected]
>To: [email protected]
>Subject: Re: [Unschooling-dotcom] new sibling was Extended nursing,
>Date: Fri, 20 Oct 2000 08:56:11 EDT
>
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