homeschooling an only child
Sherry Hagen
Hi folks,
I wonder how many people out there are homeschooling an only child. I
have a six year old boy that we unschool. The older he gets the more
self directed he gets. There are times that I'm bored and feel like I
have not purpose other than being the adult at home. I suppose I could
start cleaning my house more. I'm trying to involve him more in what I
do but on the other hand when he's on a roll of discovery I don't want
to interfer. Today I road in the back of a train he made to go down
into a iron mine. (we saw an iron mine last week and took a train down
in it.) We are sort of trying to have another child, I'm 42 and it's
been about a year. Our son said today, "He'd be happier if he had a
brother or sister but he'd still be happy if he didn't."
I guess the question is how to handle a day that is an endless discovery
for my son but rather isolating and boring to me at times?
Sherry
PS: We do try and do daily outing. We have some outside activities
scheduled.
I wonder how many people out there are homeschooling an only child. I
have a six year old boy that we unschool. The older he gets the more
self directed he gets. There are times that I'm bored and feel like I
have not purpose other than being the adult at home. I suppose I could
start cleaning my house more. I'm trying to involve him more in what I
do but on the other hand when he's on a roll of discovery I don't want
to interfer. Today I road in the back of a train he made to go down
into a iron mine. (we saw an iron mine last week and took a train down
in it.) We are sort of trying to have another child, I'm 42 and it's
been about a year. Our son said today, "He'd be happier if he had a
brother or sister but he'd still be happy if he didn't."
I guess the question is how to handle a day that is an endless discovery
for my son but rather isolating and boring to me at times?
Sherry
PS: We do try and do daily outing. We have some outside activities
scheduled.
Shannon Brophy
Sherry,
We are unschooling an only child, 3.5 years, and I look forward to his
independence as it seems your son has at 6. Now you can get involved in
hobbies/interests and unschool yourself. It will be good for him to see you
learn something new, and passionate about a project. Is there something you
always wanted to know more about? Start dabbling. Craft or art projects?
Musical interests? Volunteering?
Causes you believe in and want to help? The Society for Creative Anachronism
got me going on making medieval costumes, a fun thing for me. Maybe there is
a class you would like to take? A dance happening in your town? Making
friends that are adults can also help, other hs parents or just parents. I
like the idea of working together on whatever with friends with kids near in
one person's home.
Best wishes,
Shannon
In response to:
I wonder how many people out there are homeschooling an only child. (snip
I guess the question is how to handle a day that is an endless discovery
for my son but rather isolating and boring to me at times?
Sherry
We are unschooling an only child, 3.5 years, and I look forward to his
independence as it seems your son has at 6. Now you can get involved in
hobbies/interests and unschool yourself. It will be good for him to see you
learn something new, and passionate about a project. Is there something you
always wanted to know more about? Start dabbling. Craft or art projects?
Musical interests? Volunteering?
Causes you believe in and want to help? The Society for Creative Anachronism
got me going on making medieval costumes, a fun thing for me. Maybe there is
a class you would like to take? A dance happening in your town? Making
friends that are adults can also help, other hs parents or just parents. I
like the idea of working together on whatever with friends with kids near in
one person's home.
Best wishes,
Shannon
In response to:
I wonder how many people out there are homeschooling an only child. (snip
I guess the question is how to handle a day that is an endless discovery
for my son but rather isolating and boring to me at times?
Sherry
Olivia
Hi Sherry:
I am unschooling only one child, a boy who is seven, and there are lots of
times I ask myself the question you have asked. There are days when I
suggest many activities my son and I could do together and he doesn't like
any of them; he would prefer to work alone, on a computer program usually,
or finish some Lego project. I feel quite unnecessary sometimes, except for
lunches, driving him to the activities he likes, and the
all-important touch-base-with Mom hugs that are needed here and
there. Also, I am coming to realize that parents won't always share the
passions of their children; although I play with my son and share his
projects, my passions tend towards nature and natural history, not cars and
computer games. (Sometimes I just can't stand playing car racing games just
one more time, and my son yawns when I get excited about seeing a new bird
in the yard!) I guess it's good that these children can self-direct, but
that points up the fact that we adults should also be self-directed and
find things about which we can become passionate. Of course, that requires
deciding what interests us and pursuing those interests, thus providing a
good example of adults (especially female adults) leading full lives. This
is sometimes easier said than done, at least I have found it
so. Unschoolers say that boredom is often a good thing because it leads us
on to new interests. Are there any hobbies or past interests that you may
want to revisit? Or perhaps learn something new? Well, I am still working
on finding my interests, but I can definitely say they won't include more
housework! :-)
On another note, I feel we are in a similar place as far as age (I'm
turning 41) and more children go. I had a miscarriage over two years ago
and we haven't really been trying since, but I am rethinking this idea
(although I am worried about childbirth at this age). I am also thinking
about adopting an older child (perhaps toddler age?), but wonder how
homeschooling would affect adoption. I feel I have the time and love to
give to another child, but my son has been used to being an only for so
long that he prefers not sharing his parents with anyone else. I have
suggested the idea and he isn't thrilled. It is true that I am more
available to him now for sports play, field trips and one-on-one play than
I would be if we had another child, especially another infant. But there
are other personal, emotional issues that go into the decision to add to
one's family that need to be considered. It is difficult to weigh all the
options sometimes.
Well, I am rambling. As a final thought, sometimes when I am feeling
isolated and my son has spent a lot of time absorbed in one thing, I try to
get us out of the house to do something we both like, or I spend some time
investigating fresh ideas for field trips and start planning something. A
change of scene breaks the monotony, and if we involve other friends and
their parents, I get to exchange ideas with other adults while my son has a
good time with other kids.
Sorry if this was too long!
Olivia
I am unschooling only one child, a boy who is seven, and there are lots of
times I ask myself the question you have asked. There are days when I
suggest many activities my son and I could do together and he doesn't like
any of them; he would prefer to work alone, on a computer program usually,
or finish some Lego project. I feel quite unnecessary sometimes, except for
lunches, driving him to the activities he likes, and the
all-important touch-base-with Mom hugs that are needed here and
there. Also, I am coming to realize that parents won't always share the
passions of their children; although I play with my son and share his
projects, my passions tend towards nature and natural history, not cars and
computer games. (Sometimes I just can't stand playing car racing games just
one more time, and my son yawns when I get excited about seeing a new bird
in the yard!) I guess it's good that these children can self-direct, but
that points up the fact that we adults should also be self-directed and
find things about which we can become passionate. Of course, that requires
deciding what interests us and pursuing those interests, thus providing a
good example of adults (especially female adults) leading full lives. This
is sometimes easier said than done, at least I have found it
so. Unschoolers say that boredom is often a good thing because it leads us
on to new interests. Are there any hobbies or past interests that you may
want to revisit? Or perhaps learn something new? Well, I am still working
on finding my interests, but I can definitely say they won't include more
housework! :-)
On another note, I feel we are in a similar place as far as age (I'm
turning 41) and more children go. I had a miscarriage over two years ago
and we haven't really been trying since, but I am rethinking this idea
(although I am worried about childbirth at this age). I am also thinking
about adopting an older child (perhaps toddler age?), but wonder how
homeschooling would affect adoption. I feel I have the time and love to
give to another child, but my son has been used to being an only for so
long that he prefers not sharing his parents with anyone else. I have
suggested the idea and he isn't thrilled. It is true that I am more
available to him now for sports play, field trips and one-on-one play than
I would be if we had another child, especially another infant. But there
are other personal, emotional issues that go into the decision to add to
one's family that need to be considered. It is difficult to weigh all the
options sometimes.
Well, I am rambling. As a final thought, sometimes when I am feeling
isolated and my son has spent a lot of time absorbed in one thing, I try to
get us out of the house to do something we both like, or I spend some time
investigating fresh ideas for field trips and start planning something. A
change of scene breaks the monotony, and if we involve other friends and
their parents, I get to exchange ideas with other adults while my son has a
good time with other kids.
Sorry if this was too long!
Olivia
>Message: 2
> Date: Fri, 13 Oct 2000 22:19:56 -0500
> From: Sherry Hagen <oilmagic@...>
>Subject: homeschooling an only child
>
>Hi folks,
>
>I wonder how many people out there are homeschooling an only child. I
>have a six year old boy that we unschool. The older he gets the more
>self directed he gets. There are times that I'm bored and feel like I
>have not purpose other than being the adult at home. I suppose I could
>start cleaning my house more. I'm trying to involve him more in what I
>do but on the other hand when he's on a roll of discovery I don't want
>to interfer. Today I road in the back of a train he made to go down
>into a iron mine. (we saw an iron mine last week and took a train down
>in it.) We are sort of trying to have another child, I'm 42 and it's
>been about a year. Our son said today, "He'd be happier if he had a
>brother or sister but he'd still be happy if he didn't."
>I guess the question is how to handle a day that is an endless discovery
>for my son but rather isolating and boring to me at times?
>
>Sherry
>
>PS: We do try and do daily outing. We have some outside activities
>scheduled.
Sherry Hagen
Hi folks,
Thanks everyone for responding. It's nice to know other folks are out
there and coming up with creative solutions.
I'll be making Christmas presents for family soon, which can be fun.
I'll be doing some sewing of skirts, shirts and pants.
It's basically Ren. Fair type clothes. My son likes to push the peddle
on the machine for a little while (until something else
excites him). If I'm spending any more time on housework it's going to
be a group project!
Sherry
Thanks everyone for responding. It's nice to know other folks are out
there and coming up with creative solutions.
I'll be making Christmas presents for family soon, which can be fun.
I'll be doing some sewing of skirts, shirts and pants.
It's basically Ren. Fair type clothes. My son likes to push the peddle
on the machine for a little while (until something else
excites him). If I'm spending any more time on housework it's going to
be a group project!
Sherry