reading WAS abberavtions and reading
Lisa H
<<Cheyenne wrote: My daughter is 10 and isn't doing either and her peers are. ...but it would be nice to know I'm not alone because sometimes I certainly feel it.>>
Hi Cheyenne,
You are not alone. My 11yo dd is not doing math and reading as are her ps peers - or her hs peers (as far as anyone is willing to disclose). I will tell you what helps me. I focus on all the wonders, beauty and amazing things she is doing. And when my fear pushes me into the comparison headset i stop and recognize all the things that she does that are unique to her and that none (or few) of her peers (by age) might be doing.
The hardest part of the situation has been other peoples perceptions. Primarily family because outside of family no one seems to notice (at this point most people just assume the skills are there already). It helped tremendously for my dh to go to the LiveandLearn conference and to never hear from anyone - "you're kidding, she's not reading yet...have you had her tested?"
It does require my assistance in anything that requires reading. And while at times it would be nice to have a dd who is more independent in this area it does not seem to reflect in anyway her ability to cope with the world or her intelligence.
I've always had complete confidence in the inevitability of her learning to read. However, in the past year i've been challenged by my unschooling friends to consider the possibility that she may never be fully literate. It's been really enlightening to once again recognize a preconceived expectation that i need to let go of. Though, as i continue to see her growing in this area (albeit in slow motion - as i call it) i still have confidence that it will happen.
Lisa Heyman
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Hi Cheyenne,
You are not alone. My 11yo dd is not doing math and reading as are her ps peers - or her hs peers (as far as anyone is willing to disclose). I will tell you what helps me. I focus on all the wonders, beauty and amazing things she is doing. And when my fear pushes me into the comparison headset i stop and recognize all the things that she does that are unique to her and that none (or few) of her peers (by age) might be doing.
The hardest part of the situation has been other peoples perceptions. Primarily family because outside of family no one seems to notice (at this point most people just assume the skills are there already). It helped tremendously for my dh to go to the LiveandLearn conference and to never hear from anyone - "you're kidding, she's not reading yet...have you had her tested?"
It does require my assistance in anything that requires reading. And while at times it would be nice to have a dd who is more independent in this area it does not seem to reflect in anyway her ability to cope with the world or her intelligence.
I've always had complete confidence in the inevitability of her learning to read. However, in the past year i've been challenged by my unschooling friends to consider the possibility that she may never be fully literate. It's been really enlightening to once again recognize a preconceived expectation that i need to let go of. Though, as i continue to see her growing in this area (albeit in slow motion - as i call it) i still have confidence that it will happen.
Lisa Heyman
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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In a message dated 10/13/04 5:06:54 AM, Lmanathome@... writes:
<< My 11yo dd is not doing math and reading as are her ps peers - or her hs
peers (as far as anyone is willing to disclose). I will tell you what helps
me. I focus on all the wonders, beauty and amazing things she is doing. And
when my fear pushes me into the comparison headset i stop and recognize all the
things that she does that are unique to her and that none (or few) of her peers
(by age) might be doing. >>
Holly didn't read until she was 11. It really surprised the heck out of me.
The only excuse/justification is that she was a preemie. No other straws for
me to cling to.
She's not quite 13, though, and her most recent chosen reading was "The
Body" by Stephen King (the story on which the movie "Stand by Me" was based).
She went from 5mph to 60, as it were, in a year and a half. I think most kids
her age (based on having taught that age and seen kids reading, seeing their
reading choices, dealing with a badillion (okay, hundreds) of one-on-one oral
book reports (I shunned that whole written report or stand-up review), lots of
kids her age who have officialy been reading since they were six would NOT
choose something that adult or that difficult, or their parents wouldn't let them,
or their teachers would say "That's not a whole book, you have to read a
whole book," at which point the kid would put down the Stephen King and pick up
some insipid 58 page bit of fluff.
My browser is being slow or I would quote it, but there's info on some
advantages we found with Holly when she wasn't reading, linked here:
http://sandradodd.com/reading
Sandra
<< My 11yo dd is not doing math and reading as are her ps peers - or her hs
peers (as far as anyone is willing to disclose). I will tell you what helps
me. I focus on all the wonders, beauty and amazing things she is doing. And
when my fear pushes me into the comparison headset i stop and recognize all the
things that she does that are unique to her and that none (or few) of her peers
(by age) might be doing. >>
Holly didn't read until she was 11. It really surprised the heck out of me.
The only excuse/justification is that she was a preemie. No other straws for
me to cling to.
She's not quite 13, though, and her most recent chosen reading was "The
Body" by Stephen King (the story on which the movie "Stand by Me" was based).
She went from 5mph to 60, as it were, in a year and a half. I think most kids
her age (based on having taught that age and seen kids reading, seeing their
reading choices, dealing with a badillion (okay, hundreds) of one-on-one oral
book reports (I shunned that whole written report or stand-up review), lots of
kids her age who have officialy been reading since they were six would NOT
choose something that adult or that difficult, or their parents wouldn't let them,
or their teachers would say "That's not a whole book, you have to read a
whole book," at which point the kid would put down the Stephen King and pick up
some insipid 58 page bit of fluff.
My browser is being slow or I would quote it, but there's info on some
advantages we found with Holly when she wasn't reading, linked here:
http://sandradodd.com/reading
Sandra