Kristi Nelson

Hello! I am sure you all have been asked this question before, but I
am sure you need practice refining your answers.

I have been homeschooling my daughter for a little over 3 years. We
made a miserable attempt at unschooling when we started.
Unfortunately, we were socializing with homeschoolers that were very
school-at-home and I gave in. For the next couple of years we used an
eclectic approach with mixed results. This last year, we purchased a
curriculum. We have been muddling through it, but both my daughter and
I want something more.

Anybody have suggestions? I know she could go so far, if she would
just go! How do I get her started learning on her own? I have borrowed
The Teenage Liberation Handbook from the library and I have just
started reading it. I would like her to read it as well, but I am not
sure how to approach it. If she feels it is forced, she will
half-heartedly read it.

Thank you everyone in advance!

Kristi N.

plaidpanties666

--- In [email protected], "Kristi Nelson"
<cnknelson@...> wrote:
>> Anybody have suggestions? I know she could go so far, if she would
> just go! How do I get her started learning on her own?

Well, the first, last and hardest thing is this: let go of your own
agendas and expectations about what she should learn and how she
should learn it.

While you're working on that (it'll take awhile) declare a
homeschool-holiday and have some fun together. Do some things just
for the heck of it. Tell yourself firmly to *not*
evaluate "activities" for their "learning potential" and just *do*
stuff. Go window shopping. Watch silly movies together. Ask your dd
what she would do if she had a "free" day to do Anything she wanted.
A free week? Find ways to do those things. Learn about who she is
Right Now - not the future-potential person she could be.

Because, the thing is, she *is* learning on her own. You're just not
seeing it.

---Meredith (Mo 5, Ray 13)

Kristi Nelson

I know, I know! It is just soooo hard to let go of the school
mentality. I want her to see that learning is everywhere. But the more
we do curriculum, the less she is able to see this. This week for
example, we took spring break. She goes to the YMCA on Wednesdays for
swim/gym. I asked her if she wanted to go since we were on break and
she said, "yes, at least it's not educational." Is there a sneaky way
for me to work her into unschooling? Without even telling her that is
what we are doing?

Kristi N.




--- In [email protected], "plaidpanties666"
<plaidpanties666@...> wrote:
>
> --- In [email protected], "Kristi Nelson"
> <cnknelson@> wrote:
> >> Anybody have suggestions? I know she could go so far, if she would
> > just go! How do I get her started learning on her own?
>
> Well, the first, last and hardest thing is this: let go of your own
> agendas and expectations about what she should learn and how she
> should learn it.
>
> While you're working on that (it'll take awhile) declare a
> homeschool-holiday and have some fun together. Do some things just
> for the heck of it. Tell yourself firmly to *not*
> evaluate "activities" for their "learning potential" and just *do*
> stuff. Go window shopping. Watch silly movies together. Ask your dd
> what she would do if she had a "free" day to do Anything she wanted.
> A free week? Find ways to do those things. Learn about who she is
> Right Now - not the future-potential person she could be.
>
> Because, the thing is, she *is* learning on her own. You're just not
> seeing it.
>
> ---Meredith (Mo 5, Ray 13)
>

Kristie Cochran

Why don't you just tell her she's finished everything for the year and
it's time for summer vacation and just never come off of vacation. You
don't have to be sneaky about it.

Kristie

Kristi Nelson wrote:
>
> I know, I know! It is just soooo hard to let go of the school
> mentality. I want her to see that learning is everywhere. But the more
> we do curriculum, the less she is able to see this. This week for
> example, we took spring break. She goes to the YMCA on Wednesdays for
> swim/gym. I asked her if she wanted to go since we were on break and
> she said, "yes, at least it's not educational." Is there a sneaky way
> for me to work her into unschooling? Without even telling her that is
> what we are doing?
>
> Kristi N.
>
> -
>

[email protected]

-----Original Message-----
From: cnknelson@...

I know, I know! It is just soooo hard to let go of the school
mentality. I want her to see that learning is everywhere. But the more
we do curriculum, the less she is able to see this. This week for
example, we took spring break. She goes to the YMCA on Wednesdays for
swim/gym. I asked her if she wanted to go since we were on break and
she said, "yes, at least it's not educational." Is there a sneaky way
for me to work her into unschooling? Without even telling her that is
what we are doing?

-=-=-=-=-

Is your goal to be sneaky? Is that the way you'd like her to treat you?

Can you think of a better way?


~Kelly

Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org


________________________________________________________________________
AOL now offers free email to everyone. Find out more about what's free
from AOL at AOL.com.

chandelle'

i am also confused why you can't just discuss with her your feelings about
the "education" she is currently receiving openly and honestly. you said
yourself that the more she does curriculum the less she wants to actually
learn. why wait? and why sneak it in when it can be a joint effort between
you? as for the book, you could read her passages that you find
significant, just because you'd like to share them with her, not to be
sneaky, and be straightforward with her that you think it would be a fun
thing for her to read, but let her take the lead on whether or not to read
it. leave it laying around a lot. (i do this with my husband, who loves to
read but rarely has the time to read everything i want him to...i just read
him passages or leave it open by the toilet to a page i want him to read.
seems like that's the only time he gets a chance, LOL!)

chandelle'

On 4/6/07, kbcdlovejo@... <kbcdlovejo@...> wrote:
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: cnknelson@...
>
> I know, I know! It is just soooo hard to let go of the school
> mentality. I want her to see that learning is everywhere. But the more
> we do curriculum, the less she is able to see this. This week for
> example, we took spring break. She goes to the YMCA on Wednesdays for
> swim/gym. I asked her if she wanted to go since we were on break and
> she said, "yes, at least it's not educational." Is there a sneaky way
> for me to work her into unschooling? Without even telling her that is
> what we are doing?
>
> -=-=-=-=-
>
> Is your goal to be sneaky? Is that the way you'd like her to treat you?
>
> Can you think of a better way?
>
>
> ~Kelly
>
> Kelly Lovejoy
> Conference Coordinator
> Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
> http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
>
>
> ________________________________________________________________________
> AOL now offers free email to everyone. Find out more about what's free
> from AOL at AOL.com.
>
>
>
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>
>


--
"Years ago I recognized my kinship with all living things, and I made up my
mind that I was not one bit better than the meanest on the earth. I said
then and I say now, that while there is a lower class, I am in it; while
there is a criminal element, I am of it; while there is a soul in prison, I
am not free."
-Eugene V. Debs


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

-----Original Message-----
From: cnknelson@...

Anybody have suggestions? I know she could go so far, if she would
just go! How do I get her started learning on her own? I have borrowed
The Teenage Liberation Handbook from the library and I have just
started reading it. I would like her to read it as well, but I am not
sure how to approach it. If she feels it is forced, she will
half-heartedly read it.

-=-=-=-

I HIGHLY recommend a conference. She would be on board almost
immediately.

But she needs *healing* first! She needs to "veg out" for a few months.
To get her head together.

Before she can rediscover learning, she'll have to do nothing for a
while. She won't actually *BE* doing nothing. It'll just look that way.

She'll be healing and finding out about what makes her tick. *YOU* just
have to be patient. Very, very patient. Trust that she's doing what's
needed. It will probably look like sleeping, talking on the phone, and
watching TV. But it will soon (and certainly NOT soon enough!) start
looking like something---like gardening or drawing or sewing or
skateboarding---or something interesting.

You can read the book TO her. I read the TLH to Cameron when he was
deschooling. He really doesn't remember much---if anything. But he
remembers talking about it. And now he's been to Grace's camps, so he
knows her personally.

This will be the most painful period for *you* because it is! Watching
your child do nothing. It sucks. But it's necessary for the healing to
take place. And the more patient you are, the quicker it'll happen!

Patience. Patience. Patience!

Oh---also go to or rent lots and lots of movies. Eat out at or fix
ethnic food. Do things considered "vacation-y." PLAY!



~Kelly

Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org


________________________________________________________________________
AOL now offers free email to everyone. Find out more about what's free
from AOL at AOL.com.

Ren Allen

~~Anybody have suggestions? I know she could go so far, if she would
just go! How do I get her started learning on her own?~~

She's been learning on her own from the day she was born...not
entirely on her own of course. There have been people and experiences
and books and tv shows and all sorts of things that have assisted her
learning.

Are you wanting her learning to look a certain way? It might never
look anything like school work. How "far" does she need to go? Maybe
she just wants to explore right in her own home for a while.

Learning isn't about milestones, or "going far" or looking a certain
way. It's a journey. And it's best defined by living well.

Ren
learninginfreedom.com

Kristi Nelson

Thank you everyone for your advice! I have had the answers all along.
Just need to take the plunge!

Kristi N.

--- In [email protected], "Ren Allen"
<starsuncloud@...> wrote:
>
> ~~Anybody have suggestions? I know she could go so far, if she would
> just go! How do I get her started learning on her own?~~
>
> She's been learning on her own from the day she was born...not
> entirely on her own of course. There have been people and experiences
> and books and tv shows and all sorts of things that have assisted her
> learning.
>
> Are you wanting her learning to look a certain way? It might never
> look anything like school work. How "far" does she need to go? Maybe
> she just wants to explore right in her own home for a while.
>
> Learning isn't about milestones, or "going far" or looking a certain
> way. It's a journey. And it's best defined by living well.
>
> Ren
> learninginfreedom.com
>