New and with a teenager
[email protected]
Hi,
I have a formerly conventionally schooled daughter aged 14. I feel that she would have been a fabulous unschooler, and should have been unschooled from the start, but I had reasons why I had to go to work full-time and could not stay home and unschool. Consequently, and sadly, she spent 9 years in school and I watched the life get sucked out of her until she just could not take it any more and voluntarily announced that she was not going to High School.
My question is: How does one start unschooling a child who has had an institutionalized education and is turned off to anything that reeks of having to learn something? Does anyone else have a teenager that is new to unschooling? I am battling the family scrutiny (she isnt DOING anything!) and the parents of her friends (she will never go to college!). I really dont give a horses you-know-what about their opinions, I just need some suggestions about how to inspire my daughter. She is admittedly more relaxed these days, and I am not pushing her, but what does unschooling look like given this situation?
Kathryn
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
I have a formerly conventionally schooled daughter aged 14. I feel that she would have been a fabulous unschooler, and should have been unschooled from the start, but I had reasons why I had to go to work full-time and could not stay home and unschool. Consequently, and sadly, she spent 9 years in school and I watched the life get sucked out of her until she just could not take it any more and voluntarily announced that she was not going to High School.
My question is: How does one start unschooling a child who has had an institutionalized education and is turned off to anything that reeks of having to learn something? Does anyone else have a teenager that is new to unschooling? I am battling the family scrutiny (she isnt DOING anything!) and the parents of her friends (she will never go to college!). I really dont give a horses you-know-what about their opinions, I just need some suggestions about how to inspire my daughter. She is admittedly more relaxed these days, and I am not pushing her, but what does unschooling look like given this situation?
Kathryn
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Wildflower Car
I think you should let her do what she wants. Watch T.V., listen to her
radio, talk on the phone, nd whatever else she might do during the day. You
have to give her time to de-school. It may appear that she is doing nothing,
but she is! When your home take her with you to the store or bank or
whatever if she wants. If not, let her have some down time. I wouldn't do
anything to her or for her as far as academics go unless she ask. Maybe get
her few subscriptions to whatever magazines she likes if you want her
reading.
In the mean time, start reading up on unschooling, look at web sites, read
the blogs, and stay on these type list. It will take a natural course.
I wasn't "Unschooled" until my freshman year of highschool and I went to
college. It was a waste of my time for the most part.
When I started unschooling It didn't look like I was doing anything for
almost a year, and even then it was slow. I had to learn a new thinking
pattern and redefine my own image of education. My parents had tried to show
me how to unschool, it was annoying. But when they showed me by example that
they were still students of life, I learned to become a student of my own
life.
Hope that helps!
Wildflower
Find a local pizza place, music store, museum and more�then map the best
route! http://local.live.com
radio, talk on the phone, nd whatever else she might do during the day. You
have to give her time to de-school. It may appear that she is doing nothing,
but she is! When your home take her with you to the store or bank or
whatever if she wants. If not, let her have some down time. I wouldn't do
anything to her or for her as far as academics go unless she ask. Maybe get
her few subscriptions to whatever magazines she likes if you want her
reading.
In the mean time, start reading up on unschooling, look at web sites, read
the blogs, and stay on these type list. It will take a natural course.
I wasn't "Unschooled" until my freshman year of highschool and I went to
college. It was a waste of my time for the most part.
When I started unschooling It didn't look like I was doing anything for
almost a year, and even then it was slow. I had to learn a new thinking
pattern and redefine my own image of education. My parents had tried to show
me how to unschool, it was annoying. But when they showed me by example that
they were still students of life, I learned to become a student of my own
life.
Hope that helps!
Wildflower
>From: airokat@..._________________________________________________________________
>Reply-To: [email protected]
>To: [email protected]
>Subject: [unschoolingbasics] New and with a teenager
>Date: Mon, 02 Oct 2006 21:45:04 +0000
>
>Hi,
>I have a formerly conventionally schooled daughter aged 14. I feel that she
>would have been a fabulous unschooler, and should have been unschooled from
>the start, but I had reasons why I had to go to work full-time and could
>not stay home and unschool. Consequently, and sadly, she spent 9 years in
>school and I watched the life get sucked out of her until she just could
>not take it any more and voluntarily announced that she was not going to
>High School.
>My question is: How does one start unschooling a child who has had an
>institutionalized education and is turned off to anything that reeks of
>having to learn something? Does anyone else have a teenager that is new to
>unschooling? I am battling the family scrutiny (she isnt DOING anything!)
>and the parents of her friends (she will never go to college!). I really
>dont give a horses you-know-what about their opinions, I just need some
>suggestions about how to inspire my daughter. She is admittedly more
>relaxed these days, and I am not pushing her, but what does unschooling
>look like given this situation?
>Kathryn
>
>[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
>
Find a local pizza place, music store, museum and more�then map the best
route! http://local.live.com
Lesa
First you need to give her time to deschool. She may want to read the
Teenage Liberation Handbook". Really... just give her time. My DD was in
the public school system from K-3... we quickly came to unschooling... it
took her about 6 months of *nothing* for her to express interest in even
going to the library to get videos or books about anything she's interested
in. I didn't push... I knew from hearing all the advice on this group that
she would eventually come out of the abyss.
Lesa
http://lifeacademy.homeschooljournal.net
-------Original Message-------
From: airokat@...
Date: 10/02/06 17:38:15
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] New and with a teenager
Hi,
I have a formerly conventionally schooled daughter aged 14. I feel that she
would have been a fabulous unschooler, and should have been unschooled from
the start, but I had reasons why I had to go to work full-time and could not
stay home and unschool. Consequently, and sadly, she spent 9 years in school
and I watched the life get sucked out of her until she just could not take
it any more and voluntarily announced that she was not going to High School.
My question is: How does one start unschooling a child who has had an
institutionalized education and is turned off to anything that reeks of
having to learn something? Does anyone else have a teenager that is new to
unschooling? I am battling the family scrutiny (she isnt DOING anything!)
and the parents of her friends (she will never go to college!). I really
dont give a horses you-know-what about their opinions, I just need some
suggestions about how to inspire my daughter. She is admittedly more relaxed
these days, and I am not pushing her, but what does unschooling look like
given this situation?
Kathryn
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Teenage Liberation Handbook". Really... just give her time. My DD was in
the public school system from K-3... we quickly came to unschooling... it
took her about 6 months of *nothing* for her to express interest in even
going to the library to get videos or books about anything she's interested
in. I didn't push... I knew from hearing all the advice on this group that
she would eventually come out of the abyss.
Lesa
http://lifeacademy.homeschooljournal.net
-------Original Message-------
From: airokat@...
Date: 10/02/06 17:38:15
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] New and with a teenager
Hi,
I have a formerly conventionally schooled daughter aged 14. I feel that she
would have been a fabulous unschooler, and should have been unschooled from
the start, but I had reasons why I had to go to work full-time and could not
stay home and unschool. Consequently, and sadly, she spent 9 years in school
and I watched the life get sucked out of her until she just could not take
it any more and voluntarily announced that she was not going to High School.
My question is: How does one start unschooling a child who has had an
institutionalized education and is turned off to anything that reeks of
having to learn something? Does anyone else have a teenager that is new to
unschooling? I am battling the family scrutiny (she isnt DOING anything!)
and the parents of her friends (she will never go to college!). I really
dont give a horses you-know-what about their opinions, I just need some
suggestions about how to inspire my daughter. She is admittedly more relaxed
these days, and I am not pushing her, but what does unschooling look like
given this situation?
Kathryn
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Meadow Linden
Hello! I would suggest she or you read Grace Llewelyn's books - Teenage Liberation Handbook or Real Lives: 11 teenagers who don't go to school, etc. Better yet, just get the books from your library and leave them laying around so that she can pick them up if she wants to. I am 36 and I feel that it took me a solid 18 years to get over being institutionalized. It won't take her so long with all your love and support but remember that she IS an amazing person and she WILL find her way. Trust her and trust what she wants to do. We have a 19 year old young woman in our lives (she lives with us off and on) who was taken out of school when she was 11. She deschooled for about a year (thanks to her cool, cool mom) and in the last three years has (completely on her own initiative) gone to Not-back-to-school-camp in Oregon (also a Grace Llewelyn thing), spent 3 months working on an organic farm in Japan, worked lots of jobs - scraping money wherever possible, travelled with us
and other friends taking care of small children, gone to a midwifery conference in Denmark then spent 5 months working on organic farms in Spain, learned to sew and to garden and to play the piano, read countless books, had a romantic relationship, worked this year at Not-back-to-school-camp as a cook, and many, many other things. And just let me say that she is not an exceptional person other than in the way that we all are if left to do as we should. Congratulations to your daughter and to you/your family for supporting her. She has a strong inner voice that will serve her well I'm sure!
Meadow
life learner with daughter Indigo (9), son Tashi (5), and lovely husband Kirk
Wildflower Car <unschoolfool@...> wrote:
I think you should let her do what she wants. Watch T.V., listen to her
radio, talk on the phone, nd whatever else she might do during the day. You
have to give her time to de-school. It may appear that she is doing nothing,
but she is! When your home take her with you to the store or bank or
whatever if she wants. If not, let her have some down time. I wouldn't do
anything to her or for her as far as academics go unless she ask. Maybe get
her few subscriptions to whatever magazines she likes if you want her
reading.
In the mean time, start reading up on unschooling, look at web sites, read
the blogs, and stay on these type list. It will take a natural course.
I wasn't "Unschooled" until my freshman year of highschool and I went to
college. It was a waste of my time for the most part.
When I started unschooling It didn't look like I was doing anything for
almost a year, and even then it was slow. I had to learn a new thinking
pattern and redefine my own image of education. My parents had tried to show
me how to unschool, it was annoying. But when they showed me by example that
they were still students of life, I learned to become a student of my own
life.
Hope that helps!
Wildflower
Find a local pizza place, music store, museum and more then map the best
route! http://local.live.com
Yahoo! Groups Links
---------------------------------
Talk is cheap. Use Yahoo! Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls. Great rates starting at 1¢/min.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
and other friends taking care of small children, gone to a midwifery conference in Denmark then spent 5 months working on organic farms in Spain, learned to sew and to garden and to play the piano, read countless books, had a romantic relationship, worked this year at Not-back-to-school-camp as a cook, and many, many other things. And just let me say that she is not an exceptional person other than in the way that we all are if left to do as we should. Congratulations to your daughter and to you/your family for supporting her. She has a strong inner voice that will serve her well I'm sure!
Meadow
life learner with daughter Indigo (9), son Tashi (5), and lovely husband Kirk
Wildflower Car <unschoolfool@...> wrote:
I think you should let her do what she wants. Watch T.V., listen to her
radio, talk on the phone, nd whatever else she might do during the day. You
have to give her time to de-school. It may appear that she is doing nothing,
but she is! When your home take her with you to the store or bank or
whatever if she wants. If not, let her have some down time. I wouldn't do
anything to her or for her as far as academics go unless she ask. Maybe get
her few subscriptions to whatever magazines she likes if you want her
reading.
In the mean time, start reading up on unschooling, look at web sites, read
the blogs, and stay on these type list. It will take a natural course.
I wasn't "Unschooled" until my freshman year of highschool and I went to
college. It was a waste of my time for the most part.
When I started unschooling It didn't look like I was doing anything for
almost a year, and even then it was slow. I had to learn a new thinking
pattern and redefine my own image of education. My parents had tried to show
me how to unschool, it was annoying. But when they showed me by example that
they were still students of life, I learned to become a student of my own
life.
Hope that helps!
Wildflower
>From: airokat@..._________________________________________________________________
>Reply-To: [email protected]
>To: [email protected]
>Subject: [unschoolingbasics] New and with a teenager
>Date: Mon, 02 Oct 2006 21:45:04 +0000
>
>Hi,
>I have a formerly conventionally schooled daughter aged 14. I feel that she
>would have been a fabulous unschooler, and should have been unschooled from
>the start, but I had reasons why I had to go to work full-time and could
>not stay home and unschool. Consequently, and sadly, she spent 9 years in
>school and I watched the life get sucked out of her until she just could
>not take it any more and voluntarily announced that she was not going to
>High School.
>My question is: How does one start unschooling a child who has had an
>institutionalized education and is turned off to anything that reeks of
>having to learn something? Does anyone else have a teenager that is new to
>unschooling? I am battling the family scrutiny (she isnt DOING anything!)
>and the parents of her friends (she will never go to college!). I really
>dont give a horses you-know-what about their opinions, I just need some
>suggestions about how to inspire my daughter. She is admittedly more
>relaxed these days, and I am not pushing her, but what does unschooling
>look like given this situation?
>Kathryn
>
>[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
>
Find a local pizza place, music store, museum and more then map the best
route! http://local.live.com
Yahoo! Groups Links
---------------------------------
Talk is cheap. Use Yahoo! Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls. Great rates starting at 1¢/min.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
lpodietz
Hi Kathryn,
I have been a lurker in this group for the past few weeks, but
you've inspired me to "chime in"... although I definitely don't have
big answers for you--just wanted to share our situation which sounds
like it may be similar. My son is almost 14 (in 8th grade--sounds
like your daughter is in 9th), and this is his first year out of
school. We also are new to unschooling/homeschooling, and it was not
something that we set out to do, as I and my husband both work full-
time. Our son, like your daughter, is just not cut out for the
structure of schooling, and it took a crisis (major meltdown and
depression starting last spring) for us to realize that school was
killing him slowly. We came to unschooling really because no other
option seemed right for our son... but I was extremely reluctant...
wondering what the family would think, wondering how I could
possibly handle this with a full time job (but I work at home which
helps)... and not really feeling cut out for this AT ALL. But to
our son, unschooling sounded like salvation, and it just felt like
the right thing to do for him. It's really hard on me I must admit,
but in a good way, and he is definitely a much happier person now...
We are still finding our way though, trying to rid ourselves of all
of the "shoulds" that really can screw things up!
There are a few things that have helped so far which I'll just share
in case they may be helpful to you:
One thing I've heard that does seem to be true is that when a kid
starts unschooling at a later age, it may take months
of "decompression" until they can even begin to see what they'd like
to pursue. So, your daughter probably needs time to just do nothing
for a while (or to do whatever she wants to do, even if it's to
watch TV all day). I don't think you can rush this (that's what I
keep having to remind myself of all day long).
As for the relatives and friends, you can perhaps tell them (and
yourself) that the mental health of your daughter is far more
important than missing a few months of "school". In the larger
scheme of things, taking a few months of her life to chill out from
what was a very damaging experience, will not sentence her to a life
of working in McDonald's... probably just the opposite. We are just
starting too, and definitely do NOT have this figured out, but I can
say that I have seen my son come back to life, and that is far more
wonderful to see than A's on a report card.
When we decided to do this, I sent a long e-mail to all the family
and friends to explain what homeschooling/unschooling was, I laid
out all the reasons for doing it, all the plusses, as well as all
the concerns... and how great our son was doing as a result... and
somehow this seemed to not only appease everyone, but everyone was
cheering us on!! Even my father (and believe me, this is EXTREMELY
out of character for him). So, I only mention this because it might
be a way to address everyone's concerns all at once, and might even
clarify your own thinking, and it might quiet them down a bit.
Last thing: I was really afraid that my son would be isolated
socially, even more so than fearing that he wouldn't get the proper
academic education, so I really tried hard to find a couple of group
activities around his interests. (We found a chess club and a
computer animation group) This was a great move---it made him feel
like there were others like him out there, and I met some like-
minded parents who are helpful and supportive. I've had to make
adjustments to my work schedule to accommodate getting him to these
classes, but it's worth it.
Sorry to have gone on so long... I should add that we also have a 16-
yr-old daughter in 11th grade in public school, and she's doing just
great there. She wouldn't consider unschooling if I paid her a
million dollars... so, to each their own.
Hope this helps....
Linda
I have been a lurker in this group for the past few weeks, but
you've inspired me to "chime in"... although I definitely don't have
big answers for you--just wanted to share our situation which sounds
like it may be similar. My son is almost 14 (in 8th grade--sounds
like your daughter is in 9th), and this is his first year out of
school. We also are new to unschooling/homeschooling, and it was not
something that we set out to do, as I and my husband both work full-
time. Our son, like your daughter, is just not cut out for the
structure of schooling, and it took a crisis (major meltdown and
depression starting last spring) for us to realize that school was
killing him slowly. We came to unschooling really because no other
option seemed right for our son... but I was extremely reluctant...
wondering what the family would think, wondering how I could
possibly handle this with a full time job (but I work at home which
helps)... and not really feeling cut out for this AT ALL. But to
our son, unschooling sounded like salvation, and it just felt like
the right thing to do for him. It's really hard on me I must admit,
but in a good way, and he is definitely a much happier person now...
We are still finding our way though, trying to rid ourselves of all
of the "shoulds" that really can screw things up!
There are a few things that have helped so far which I'll just share
in case they may be helpful to you:
One thing I've heard that does seem to be true is that when a kid
starts unschooling at a later age, it may take months
of "decompression" until they can even begin to see what they'd like
to pursue. So, your daughter probably needs time to just do nothing
for a while (or to do whatever she wants to do, even if it's to
watch TV all day). I don't think you can rush this (that's what I
keep having to remind myself of all day long).
As for the relatives and friends, you can perhaps tell them (and
yourself) that the mental health of your daughter is far more
important than missing a few months of "school". In the larger
scheme of things, taking a few months of her life to chill out from
what was a very damaging experience, will not sentence her to a life
of working in McDonald's... probably just the opposite. We are just
starting too, and definitely do NOT have this figured out, but I can
say that I have seen my son come back to life, and that is far more
wonderful to see than A's on a report card.
When we decided to do this, I sent a long e-mail to all the family
and friends to explain what homeschooling/unschooling was, I laid
out all the reasons for doing it, all the plusses, as well as all
the concerns... and how great our son was doing as a result... and
somehow this seemed to not only appease everyone, but everyone was
cheering us on!! Even my father (and believe me, this is EXTREMELY
out of character for him). So, I only mention this because it might
be a way to address everyone's concerns all at once, and might even
clarify your own thinking, and it might quiet them down a bit.
Last thing: I was really afraid that my son would be isolated
socially, even more so than fearing that he wouldn't get the proper
academic education, so I really tried hard to find a couple of group
activities around his interests. (We found a chess club and a
computer animation group) This was a great move---it made him feel
like there were others like him out there, and I met some like-
minded parents who are helpful and supportive. I've had to make
adjustments to my work schedule to accommodate getting him to these
classes, but it's worth it.
Sorry to have gone on so long... I should add that we also have a 16-
yr-old daughter in 11th grade in public school, and she's doing just
great there. She wouldn't consider unschooling if I paid her a
million dollars... so, to each their own.
Hope this helps....
Linda
--- In [email protected], airokat@... wrote:
>
> Hi,
> I have a formerly conventionally schooled daughter aged 14. I feel
that she would have been a fabulous unschooler, and should have been
unschooled from the start, but I had reasons why I had to go to work
full-time and could not stay home and unschool. Consequently, and
sadly, she spent 9 years in school and I watched the life get sucked
out of her until she just could not take it any more and voluntarily
announced that she was not going to High School.
> My question is: How does one start unschooling a child who has had
an institutionalized education and is turned off to anything that
reeks of having to learn something? Does anyone else have a teenager
that is new to unschooling? I am battling the family scrutiny (she
isnt DOING anything!) and the parents of her friends (she will never
go to college!). I really dont give a horses you-know-what about
their opinions, I just need some suggestions about how to inspire my
daughter. She is admittedly more relaxed these days, and I am not
pushing her, but what does unschooling look like given this
situation?
> Kathryn
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
[email protected]
Thank you for the advice. The fact that you say do nothing makes me feel more relaxed. She wanted to take a Digital Photography course so we enrolled in that at the Community College, but I am wondering if she is not mature enough for that yet. She is skipping tonight to hang out with friends. I just told her the decision was hers to go tonight or not but to remember that whatever she decided, it reflected on her. I also took her to the bookstore last night at her request and she picked out a couple of books to read. I guess I just need to relax. Its just hard sometimes to separate out the teenage issues from the deschooling issues and there is other stuff going on as well like we are in the middle of a move and her Dad is recovering from back surgery, so I cant quite quit my job yet. Yikes!
Kathryn
-------------- Original message --------------
From: "Wildflower Car" <unschoolfool@...>
Kathryn
-------------- Original message --------------
From: "Wildflower Car" <unschoolfool@...>
> I think you should let her do what she wants. Watch T.V., listen to her[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> radio, talk on the phone, nd whatever else she might do during the day. You
> have to give her time to de-school. It may appear that she is doing nothing,
> but she is! When your home take her with you to the store or bank or
> whatever if she wants. If not, let her have some down time. I wouldn't do
> anything to her or for her as far as academics go unless she ask. Maybe get
> her few subscriptions to whatever magazines she likes if you want her
> reading.
>
> In the mean time, start reading up on unschooling, look at web sites, read
> the blogs, and stay on these type list. It will take a natural course.
>
> I wasn't "Unschooled" until my freshman year of highschool and I went to
> college. It was a waste of my time for the most part.
>
> When I started unschooling It didn't look like I was doing anything for
> almost a year, and even then it was slow. I had to learn a new thinking
> pattern and redefine my own image of education. My parents had tried to show
> me how to unschool, it was annoying. But when they showed me by example that
> they were still students of life, I learned to become a student of my own
> life.
>
> Hope that helps!
> Wildflower
>
> >From: airokat@...
> >Reply-To: [email protected]
> >To: [email protected]
> >Subject: [unschoolingbasics] New and with a teenager
> >Date: Mon, 02 Oct 2006 21:45:04 +0000
> >
> >Hi,
> >I have a formerly conventionally schooled daughter aged 14. I feel that she
> >would have been a fabulous unschooler, and should have been unschooled from
> >the start, but I had reasons why I had to go to work full-time and could
> >not stay home and unschool. Consequently, and sadly, she spent 9 years in
> >school and I watched the life get sucked out of her until she just could
> >not take it any more and voluntarily announced that she was not going to
> >High School.
> >My question is: How does one start unschooling a child who has had an
> >institutionalized education and is turned off to anything that reeks of
> >having to learn something? Does anyone else have a teenager that is new to
> >unschooling? I am battling the family scrutiny (she isnt DOING anything!)
> >and the parents of her friends (she will never go to college!). I really
> >dont give a horses you-know-what about their opinions, I just need some
> >suggestions about how to inspire my daughter. She is admittedly more
> >relaxed these days, and I am not pushing her, but what does unschooling
> >look like given this situation?
> >Kathryn
> >
> >[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> >
> >
> >
>
> _________________________________________________________________
> Find a local pizza place, music store, museum and more�then map the best
> route! http://local.live.com
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
jlh44music
airokat@... wrote:
reeks of having to learn something? Does anyone else have a teenager
that is new to unschooling?>>
I also have a 14 yo daughter. This is her 2nd year out of school
(she left after 6th grade, she's at the older end of her class age
range). I, too, wish I had found unschooling long ago, but I'm at
least glad to have found it.
I came across the word unschooling when researching homeschooling.
The thing that helped me the most was to read (and I'm STILL
reading!) anything and everything I could get my hands on about
unschooling, learning, forgetting, education, whatever called to
me. Actually, the first book I read that was like a slap upside the
head was "Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory
Learning" by John Taylor Gatto. "Teenage Liberation Handbook" by
Grace Llewyllyn is good (my daughter won't read it, I've talked
about it with her), another by the same author is "Guerilla
Learning: How to give Your Kids a Read Education with or without
school". Anything by John Holt.
This is our 2nd year and even though I know this is the right path
for her, I still have my moments of doubt. I can't offer as many
words of wisdom as well as so many of the seasoned unschoolers on
this list can, but I can share that there are others who pulled an
older child from school.
She has to deschool and heal (how long has she been out of
school?). The general rule is to allow one month of down time for
every year your child was in school (and I included daycare, so
that's most of her life!). This is not a hard and fast rule, it
might take less, it may take longer. YOU have to deschool as well
(I call it "dework" sometimes! I always worked full time). Give
her lots of space. My dd loves computer and video games. She's on
most of the day (unless we have something planned). Sometimes she
watches a favorite TV program. She dislikes reading for pleasure.
Her typing and spelling has improved dramatically from playing her
online games. She loves to draw. She just started taking a dance
class after being inspired by a summer theater camp. We're
exploring places to take horseback riding lessons and working with
the animals, after going horseback riding this summer during a
camping trip. She wants to do something with animals for her
life's work.
She was getting frequent migraine headaches towards the end of her
last year in school. She frequently was stressed and anxious. She
gave up because the teachers didn't understand how she learns and
thinks (despite my attempts to educate *them* - they thought she
just wasn't trying hard enough). Now she gets as much sleep as she
needs and is much more relaxed and confident. No migraines.
I'm not expressing myself very well tonight. If you're interested
in reading some of the things I've posted about as someone new to
unschooling with a teenager, search the archives under my name
(jlh44music). There are others in a similar situation as well.
Read. Absorb. Ask questions. Expect that your concept of school
and learning will be challenged and thrown out of wack. Be open to
new ideas. Stop trying to inspire her. She needs time to find her
own way.
Jann (who still says all these things to herself! And when needed,
posts and vents here!)
> My question is: How does one start unschooling a child who has hadan institutionalized education and is turned off to anything that
reeks of having to learn something? Does anyone else have a teenager
that is new to unschooling?>>
I also have a 14 yo daughter. This is her 2nd year out of school
(she left after 6th grade, she's at the older end of her class age
range). I, too, wish I had found unschooling long ago, but I'm at
least glad to have found it.
I came across the word unschooling when researching homeschooling.
The thing that helped me the most was to read (and I'm STILL
reading!) anything and everything I could get my hands on about
unschooling, learning, forgetting, education, whatever called to
me. Actually, the first book I read that was like a slap upside the
head was "Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory
Learning" by John Taylor Gatto. "Teenage Liberation Handbook" by
Grace Llewyllyn is good (my daughter won't read it, I've talked
about it with her), another by the same author is "Guerilla
Learning: How to give Your Kids a Read Education with or without
school". Anything by John Holt.
This is our 2nd year and even though I know this is the right path
for her, I still have my moments of doubt. I can't offer as many
words of wisdom as well as so many of the seasoned unschoolers on
this list can, but I can share that there are others who pulled an
older child from school.
She has to deschool and heal (how long has she been out of
school?). The general rule is to allow one month of down time for
every year your child was in school (and I included daycare, so
that's most of her life!). This is not a hard and fast rule, it
might take less, it may take longer. YOU have to deschool as well
(I call it "dework" sometimes! I always worked full time). Give
her lots of space. My dd loves computer and video games. She's on
most of the day (unless we have something planned). Sometimes she
watches a favorite TV program. She dislikes reading for pleasure.
Her typing and spelling has improved dramatically from playing her
online games. She loves to draw. She just started taking a dance
class after being inspired by a summer theater camp. We're
exploring places to take horseback riding lessons and working with
the animals, after going horseback riding this summer during a
camping trip. She wants to do something with animals for her
life's work.
She was getting frequent migraine headaches towards the end of her
last year in school. She frequently was stressed and anxious. She
gave up because the teachers didn't understand how she learns and
thinks (despite my attempts to educate *them* - they thought she
just wasn't trying hard enough). Now she gets as much sleep as she
needs and is much more relaxed and confident. No migraines.
I'm not expressing myself very well tonight. If you're interested
in reading some of the things I've posted about as someone new to
unschooling with a teenager, search the archives under my name
(jlh44music). There are others in a similar situation as well.
Read. Absorb. Ask questions. Expect that your concept of school
and learning will be challenged and thrown out of wack. Be open to
new ideas. Stop trying to inspire her. She needs time to find her
own way.
Jann (who still says all these things to herself! And when needed,
posts and vents here!)
[email protected]
-----Original Message-----
From: airokat@...
My question is: How does one start unschooling a child who has had an
institutionalized education and is turned off to anything that reeks of
having
to learn something?
-=-=-=-=-
1) Change your language. Understand the difference between teaching and
learning. Between have to and choose to. Between now and when I'm ready.
2)
-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Does anyone else have a teenager that is new to unschooling?
-=-=-=-
He's not new to unschooling---he's now 18 and left school at the end of
sixth grade.
-=-=-=-=-
I am battling the family scrutiny (she isnt DOING anything!)
-=-=-=-
Tell them you'd be happy to discuss uschooling with them AFTER they
read the following articles, books, and websites. (Give them a nice,
long list of *homework*.) They can't intelligently discuss something
they know *nothing* about, so until they research the subject and are
knowledgeable enough to carry on a decent discussion, the subject is
off-limits. Period.
-=-=-=-=-
and the parents of her friends (she will never go to college!).
-=-=-=--
What does it matter to *them*??? Seriously, why is it important to them?
-=-=-==
I really dont give a horses you-know-what about their opinions, I just
need some suggestions about how to
inspire my daughter.
-=-==-
BE inspiring yourself! Be interested in things. Be interesting. Have
hobbies and new things in your life. Go places. Do things. Be curious.
Be fun.
-=-=-=-=-=-
She is admittedly more relaxed these days, and I am not
pushing her, but what does unschooling look like given this situation?
-=-=-=-=-
Unfortunately, not much. Seriously. It may simply look like TV and
computers and the telephone. Oh---and sleep. Lots and lots of sleep.
But given time, it will look like soooo much more. Respect your child.
Let her heal---she's still hurting. Trust that she's getting what she
needs right now----even if it's the 400th rerun of That 70s Show!
Patience. Trust. Respect. More patience. <g>
I've been there and done that. It wasn't pretty.
But you don't have to answer to ANYBODY other than your daughter. Keep
others out of your lives for a while. Enjoy your daughter--watch
movies, eat at new restaurants, go to the zoo, travel. Just do fun
stuff for a while. Then KEEP doing it---that what unschooling is!
~Kelly
________________________________________________________________________
Check out the new AOL. Most comprehensive set of free safety and
security tools, free access to millions of high-quality videos from
across the web, free AOL Mail and more.
From: airokat@...
My question is: How does one start unschooling a child who has had an
institutionalized education and is turned off to anything that reeks of
having
to learn something?
-=-=-=-=-
1) Change your language. Understand the difference between teaching and
learning. Between have to and choose to. Between now and when I'm ready.
2)
-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Does anyone else have a teenager that is new to unschooling?
-=-=-=-
He's not new to unschooling---he's now 18 and left school at the end of
sixth grade.
-=-=-=-=-
I am battling the family scrutiny (she isnt DOING anything!)
-=-=-=-
Tell them you'd be happy to discuss uschooling with them AFTER they
read the following articles, books, and websites. (Give them a nice,
long list of *homework*.) They can't intelligently discuss something
they know *nothing* about, so until they research the subject and are
knowledgeable enough to carry on a decent discussion, the subject is
off-limits. Period.
-=-=-=-=-
and the parents of her friends (she will never go to college!).
-=-=-=--
What does it matter to *them*??? Seriously, why is it important to them?
-=-=-==
I really dont give a horses you-know-what about their opinions, I just
need some suggestions about how to
inspire my daughter.
-=-==-
BE inspiring yourself! Be interested in things. Be interesting. Have
hobbies and new things in your life. Go places. Do things. Be curious.
Be fun.
-=-=-=-=-=-
She is admittedly more relaxed these days, and I am not
pushing her, but what does unschooling look like given this situation?
-=-=-=-=-
Unfortunately, not much. Seriously. It may simply look like TV and
computers and the telephone. Oh---and sleep. Lots and lots of sleep.
But given time, it will look like soooo much more. Respect your child.
Let her heal---she's still hurting. Trust that she's getting what she
needs right now----even if it's the 400th rerun of That 70s Show!
Patience. Trust. Respect. More patience. <g>
I've been there and done that. It wasn't pretty.
But you don't have to answer to ANYBODY other than your daughter. Keep
others out of your lives for a while. Enjoy your daughter--watch
movies, eat at new restaurants, go to the zoo, travel. Just do fun
stuff for a while. Then KEEP doing it---that what unschooling is!
~Kelly
________________________________________________________________________
Check out the new AOL. Most comprehensive set of free safety and
security tools, free access to millions of high-quality videos from
across the web, free AOL Mail and more.
Michelle Leifur Reid
On 10/2/06, airokat@... <airokat@...> wrote:
lot of time to get that institutionalization out of her. :-) Start
saying no less and yes more. Be with her when she watches tv, plays
computer games, vegges outside watching clouds go by. Pursue your own
passions and invite her along. It may take her a year (or more)
before you start to value what she is doing as learning. And you need
to deschool yourself as well. You've had probably twice (if not more)
schooling thoughts than she has. One important thing to remember is
that she is not going to necessarily pick up a math book one day and
start doing algebra and what she does do may not look like the
"learning" that you know now. Read Sandra Dodd's website
http://www.sandradodd.com/unschooling Read the archives here. Read
books that you see here. Get the Teenage Liberation Handbook. You've
got homework! :-)
Michelle - unschooling mom to a 14yo teen herself
> My question is: How does one start unschooling a child who has had an institutionalized education and is turned off to anything that reeks of having to learn something?Deschool deschool deschool deschool deschool. She is going to need a
lot of time to get that institutionalization out of her. :-) Start
saying no less and yes more. Be with her when she watches tv, plays
computer games, vegges outside watching clouds go by. Pursue your own
passions and invite her along. It may take her a year (or more)
before you start to value what she is doing as learning. And you need
to deschool yourself as well. You've had probably twice (if not more)
schooling thoughts than she has. One important thing to remember is
that she is not going to necessarily pick up a math book one day and
start doing algebra and what she does do may not look like the
"learning" that you know now. Read Sandra Dodd's website
http://www.sandradodd.com/unschooling Read the archives here. Read
books that you see here. Get the Teenage Liberation Handbook. You've
got homework! :-)
Michelle - unschooling mom to a 14yo teen herself
[email protected]
First of all, I want to thank everyone who responded with words of advice on my post about my daughter. I feel more relaxed about the unschooling since I found this community. I belong to another homeschooling list, and I am finding that the unschoolers are more in line with my thinking. It helps to read this list because it is a constant reminder or shall we say affirmation that allowing my daughter time to "deschool" is the right thing to do. Sometimes it is difficult when I am not surrounded on a daily basis in real life with people who share my values on this, and have to deal with the parents of her schooled friends, the neighbors, family, etc.
One thing I did do was what someone else sugessted on this board: document in "schooled terms" everything she does that can be considered educational or schoolish, and I have a good list of documentation so if anyone pokes their nose into our business, I have stuff for show and tell.
As for Not Back To School Camp, she attended this past summer and had a WONDERFUL time! I had shown her the website and asked her if she thought it would be a good way to meet other homeschoolers and she decided on her own to go. I put her on a train alone at night in Emmeryville Ca for a 17 hour trip to Oregon. (Wait, Mom....you wont let me take the bus across town at night but I can take a train at night to another state?) I gave her "Life Skills" credit for that. Anyway, she did the Natural Building workshop and a lot of other stuff including belly and swing dancing. And she wants to go back next year for the whole two weeks. She was amazed at the unschoolers and commented how accomplished they were "at more than one thing!," and that they were more educated than her peers. So I know she will be fine....i just need to trust the process and not be influenced by everyone else.
thanks again to all and I will keep reading!
Kathryn
-------------- Original message --------------
From: Meadow Linden <meadowblue4@...>
Hello! I would suggest she or you read Grace Llewelyn's books - Teenage Liberation Handbook or Real Lives: 11 teenagers who don't go to school, etc. Better yet, just get the books from your library and leave them laying around so that she can pick them up if she wants to. I am 36 and I feel that it took me a solid 18 years to get over being institutionalized. It won't take her so long with all your love and support but remember that she IS an amazing person and she WILL find her way. Trust her and trust what she wants to do. We have a 19 year old young woman in our lives (she lives with us off and on) who was taken out of school when she was 11. She deschooled for about a year (thanks to her cool, cool mom) and in the last three years has (completely on her own initiative) gone to Not-back-to-school-camp in Oregon (also a Grace Llewelyn thing), spent 3 months working on an organic farm in Japan, worked lots of jobs - scraping money wherever possible, travelled with us
and other friends taking care of small children, gone to a midwifery conference in Denmark then spent 5 months working on organic farms in Spain, learned to sew and to garden and to play the piano, read countless books, had a romantic relationship, worked this year at Not-back-to-school-camp as a cook, and many, many other things. And just let me say that she is not an exceptional person other than in the way that we all are if left to do as we should. Congratulations to your daughter and to you/your family for supporting her. She has a strong inner voice that will serve her well I'm sure!
Meadow
life learner with daughter Indigo (9), son Tashi (5), and lovely husband Kirk
Wildflower Car <unschoolfool@...> wrote:
I think you should let her do what she wants. Watch T.V., listen to her
radio, talk on the phone, nd whatever else she might do during the day. You
have to give her time to de-school. It may appear that she is doing nothing,
but she is! When your home take her with you to the store or bank or
whatever if she wants. If not, let her have some down time. I wouldn't do
anything to her or for her as far as academics go unless she ask. Maybe get
her few subscriptions to whatever magazines she likes if you want her
reading.
In the mean time, start reading up on unschooling, look at web sites, read
the blogs, and stay on these type list. It will take a natural course.
I wasn't "Unschooled" until my freshman year of highschool and I went to
college. It was a waste of my time for the most part.
When I started unschooling It didn't look like I was doing anything for
almost a year, and even then it was slow. I had to learn a new thinking
pattern and redefine my own image of education. My parents had tried to show
me how to unschool, it was annoying. But when they showed me by example that
they were still students of life, I learned to become a student of my own
life.
Hope that helps!
Wildflower
Find a local pizza place, music store, museum and more�then map the best
route! http://local.live.com
Yahoo! Groups Links
---------------------------------
Talk is cheap. Use Yahoo! Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls. Great rates starting at 1�/min.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
One thing I did do was what someone else sugessted on this board: document in "schooled terms" everything she does that can be considered educational or schoolish, and I have a good list of documentation so if anyone pokes their nose into our business, I have stuff for show and tell.
As for Not Back To School Camp, she attended this past summer and had a WONDERFUL time! I had shown her the website and asked her if she thought it would be a good way to meet other homeschoolers and she decided on her own to go. I put her on a train alone at night in Emmeryville Ca for a 17 hour trip to Oregon. (Wait, Mom....you wont let me take the bus across town at night but I can take a train at night to another state?) I gave her "Life Skills" credit for that. Anyway, she did the Natural Building workshop and a lot of other stuff including belly and swing dancing. And she wants to go back next year for the whole two weeks. She was amazed at the unschoolers and commented how accomplished they were "at more than one thing!," and that they were more educated than her peers. So I know she will be fine....i just need to trust the process and not be influenced by everyone else.
thanks again to all and I will keep reading!
Kathryn
-------------- Original message --------------
From: Meadow Linden <meadowblue4@...>
Hello! I would suggest she or you read Grace Llewelyn's books - Teenage Liberation Handbook or Real Lives: 11 teenagers who don't go to school, etc. Better yet, just get the books from your library and leave them laying around so that she can pick them up if she wants to. I am 36 and I feel that it took me a solid 18 years to get over being institutionalized. It won't take her so long with all your love and support but remember that she IS an amazing person and she WILL find her way. Trust her and trust what she wants to do. We have a 19 year old young woman in our lives (she lives with us off and on) who was taken out of school when she was 11. She deschooled for about a year (thanks to her cool, cool mom) and in the last three years has (completely on her own initiative) gone to Not-back-to-school-camp in Oregon (also a Grace Llewelyn thing), spent 3 months working on an organic farm in Japan, worked lots of jobs - scraping money wherever possible, travelled with us
and other friends taking care of small children, gone to a midwifery conference in Denmark then spent 5 months working on organic farms in Spain, learned to sew and to garden and to play the piano, read countless books, had a romantic relationship, worked this year at Not-back-to-school-camp as a cook, and many, many other things. And just let me say that she is not an exceptional person other than in the way that we all are if left to do as we should. Congratulations to your daughter and to you/your family for supporting her. She has a strong inner voice that will serve her well I'm sure!
Meadow
life learner with daughter Indigo (9), son Tashi (5), and lovely husband Kirk
Wildflower Car <unschoolfool@...> wrote:
I think you should let her do what she wants. Watch T.V., listen to her
radio, talk on the phone, nd whatever else she might do during the day. You
have to give her time to de-school. It may appear that she is doing nothing,
but she is! When your home take her with you to the store or bank or
whatever if she wants. If not, let her have some down time. I wouldn't do
anything to her or for her as far as academics go unless she ask. Maybe get
her few subscriptions to whatever magazines she likes if you want her
reading.
In the mean time, start reading up on unschooling, look at web sites, read
the blogs, and stay on these type list. It will take a natural course.
I wasn't "Unschooled" until my freshman year of highschool and I went to
college. It was a waste of my time for the most part.
When I started unschooling It didn't look like I was doing anything for
almost a year, and even then it was slow. I had to learn a new thinking
pattern and redefine my own image of education. My parents had tried to show
me how to unschool, it was annoying. But when they showed me by example that
they were still students of life, I learned to become a student of my own
life.
Hope that helps!
Wildflower
>From: airokat@...__________________________________________________________
>Reply-To: [email protected]
>To: [email protected]
>Subject: [unschoolingbasics] New and with a teenager
>Date: Mon, 02 Oct 2006 21:45:04 +0000
>
>Hi,
>I have a formerly conventionally schooled daughter aged 14. I feel that she
>would have been a fabulous unschooler, and should have been unschooled from
>the start, but I had reasons why I had to go to work full-time and could
>not stay home and unschool. Consequently, and sadly, she spent 9 years in
>school and I watched the life get sucked out of her until she just could
>not take it any more and voluntarily announced that she was not going to
>High School.
>My question is: How does one start unschooling a child who has had an
>institutionalized education and is turned off to anything that reeks of
>having to learn something? Does anyone else have a teenager that is new to
>unschooling? I am battling the family scrutiny (she isnt DOING anything!)
>and the parents of her friends (she will never go to college!). I really
>dont give a horses you-know-what about their opinions, I just need some
>suggestions about how to inspire my daughter. She is admittedly more
>relaxed these days, and I am not pushing her, but what does unschooling
>look like given this situation?
>Kathryn
>
>[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
>
Find a local pizza place, music store, museum and more�then map the best
route! http://local.live.com
Yahoo! Groups Links
---------------------------------
Talk is cheap. Use Yahoo! Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls. Great rates starting at 1�/min.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Betsy Hill
**I put her on a train alone at night in Emeryville Ca**
Hi!
I'd like to invite you and anyone else who unschools within driving
distance of Emeryville, CA to join the "SFBUN" group on Yahoo. (SFBUN
stands for San Francisco Bay Unschoolers Network, I think.)
We've got a picnic scheduled TODAY in Kensington (that may rain out)
and a game day at a Berkeley cafe tomorrow and a fun Halloween event
coming up. If your daughter liked the unschooled teens she met at
NBTSC, then maybe she'd enjoy meeting more kids that are local. (If
you live a long drive from Emeryville, then I apologize for torturing
you.)
This is a fun group and I think most all of it's members would be
happy if the group got bigger.
link : http://groups.yahoo.com/group/SFBUN/
I enjoy our online long distance relationships, but would be enthused
about meeting more people locally.
(OK, back to the main topic.)
Betsy, in Benicia
PS Maybe there is more than one Emeryville, CA???
Hi!
I'd like to invite you and anyone else who unschools within driving
distance of Emeryville, CA to join the "SFBUN" group on Yahoo. (SFBUN
stands for San Francisco Bay Unschoolers Network, I think.)
We've got a picnic scheduled TODAY in Kensington (that may rain out)
and a game day at a Berkeley cafe tomorrow and a fun Halloween event
coming up. If your daughter liked the unschooled teens she met at
NBTSC, then maybe she'd enjoy meeting more kids that are local. (If
you live a long drive from Emeryville, then I apologize for torturing
you.)
This is a fun group and I think most all of it's members would be
happy if the group got bigger.
link : http://groups.yahoo.com/group/SFBUN/
I enjoy our online long distance relationships, but would be enthused
about meeting more people locally.
(OK, back to the main topic.)
Betsy, in Benicia
PS Maybe there is more than one Emeryville, CA???
[email protected]
Betsy,
thanks! I joined. We live in Pinole, just over the bridge from you.
Kathryn
-------------- Original message --------------
From: "Betsy Hill" <ecsamhill@...>
**I put her on a train alone at night in Emeryville Ca**
Hi!
I'd like to invite you and anyone else who unschools within driving
distance of Emeryville, CA to join the "SFBUN" group on Yahoo. (SFBUN
stands for San Francisco Bay Unschoolers Network, I think.)
We've got a picnic scheduled TODAY in Kensington (that may rain out)
and a game day at a Berkeley cafe tomorrow and a fun Halloween event
coming up. If your daughter liked the unschooled teens she met at
NBTSC, then maybe she'd enjoy meeting more kids that are local. (If
you live a long drive from Emeryville, then I apologize for torturing
you.)
This is a fun group and I think most all of it's members would be
happy if the group got bigger.
link : http://groups.yahoo.com/group/SFBUN/
I enjoy our online long distance relationships, but would be enthused
about meeting more people locally.
(OK, back to the main topic.)
Betsy, in Benicia
PS Maybe there is more than one Emeryville, CA???
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
thanks! I joined. We live in Pinole, just over the bridge from you.
Kathryn
-------------- Original message --------------
From: "Betsy Hill" <ecsamhill@...>
**I put her on a train alone at night in Emeryville Ca**
Hi!
I'd like to invite you and anyone else who unschools within driving
distance of Emeryville, CA to join the "SFBUN" group on Yahoo. (SFBUN
stands for San Francisco Bay Unschoolers Network, I think.)
We've got a picnic scheduled TODAY in Kensington (that may rain out)
and a game day at a Berkeley cafe tomorrow and a fun Halloween event
coming up. If your daughter liked the unschooled teens she met at
NBTSC, then maybe she'd enjoy meeting more kids that are local. (If
you live a long drive from Emeryville, then I apologize for torturing
you.)
This is a fun group and I think most all of it's members would be
happy if the group got bigger.
link : http://groups.yahoo.com/group/SFBUN/
I enjoy our online long distance relationships, but would be enthused
about meeting more people locally.
(OK, back to the main topic.)
Betsy, in Benicia
PS Maybe there is more than one Emeryville, CA???
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
-----Original Message-----
From: airokat@...
As for Not Back To School Camp, she attended this past summer and had a
WONDERFUL time! I had shown her the website and asked her if she
thought it
would be a good way to meet other homeschoolers and she decided on her
own to
go. I put her on a train alone at night in Emmeryville Ca for a 17 hour
trip to
Oregon. (Wait, Mom....you wont let me take the bus across town at night
but I
can take a train at night to another state?) I gave her "Life Skills"
credit for
that. Anyway, she did the Natural Building workshop and a lot of other
stuff
including belly and swing dancing. And she wants to go back next year
for the
whole two weeks. She was amazed at the unschoolers and commented how
accomplished they were "at more than one thing!," and that they were
more
educated than her peers. So I know she will be fine....i just need to
trust the
process and not be influenced by everyone else.
thanks again to all and I will keep reading!
Kathryn
-=-=-=-=-
I can't recommend NBTSCamp (and the L&L Conference, of course!) enough.
It's so helpful for teens to see other teens living this lifestyle.
Helps them to realize that we parents aren't crazy either! <g>
Smart, interested, interesting, full of life! It's just wonderful.
Cameron went to NBTSCamp in West Virgnia last year. This year he went
to the Oregon AND the Vermont camps.
It's a powerful week. And they get to meet so many neat teens.
Unfortunately, several that Cam met were unschooling withOUT parental
involvement. The had just quit school and were trying to better
themselves completely on their own. That's hard. One boy got home from
camp and was immediately grounded because he hadn't cleaned his room
before he left for camp. :-( So many of the kids don't have the
home-life that our kids do. That was eye-opening for Cameron!
Anyway---back to the point: <g> It's really good for kids to see other
kids living this lifestyle. I'd make it a priority to let my child
connect with other unschoolers as much as possible. Plan
parties/camp-outs/whatever! Get them in touch with each other!
~Kelly
________________________________________________________________________
Check out the new AOL. Most comprehensive set of free safety and
security tools, free access to millions of high-quality videos from
across the web, free AOL Mail and more.
From: airokat@...
As for Not Back To School Camp, she attended this past summer and had a
WONDERFUL time! I had shown her the website and asked her if she
thought it
would be a good way to meet other homeschoolers and she decided on her
own to
go. I put her on a train alone at night in Emmeryville Ca for a 17 hour
trip to
Oregon. (Wait, Mom....you wont let me take the bus across town at night
but I
can take a train at night to another state?) I gave her "Life Skills"
credit for
that. Anyway, she did the Natural Building workshop and a lot of other
stuff
including belly and swing dancing. And she wants to go back next year
for the
whole two weeks. She was amazed at the unschoolers and commented how
accomplished they were "at more than one thing!," and that they were
more
educated than her peers. So I know she will be fine....i just need to
trust the
process and not be influenced by everyone else.
thanks again to all and I will keep reading!
Kathryn
-=-=-=-=-
I can't recommend NBTSCamp (and the L&L Conference, of course!) enough.
It's so helpful for teens to see other teens living this lifestyle.
Helps them to realize that we parents aren't crazy either! <g>
Smart, interested, interesting, full of life! It's just wonderful.
Cameron went to NBTSCamp in West Virgnia last year. This year he went
to the Oregon AND the Vermont camps.
It's a powerful week. And they get to meet so many neat teens.
Unfortunately, several that Cam met were unschooling withOUT parental
involvement. The had just quit school and were trying to better
themselves completely on their own. That's hard. One boy got home from
camp and was immediately grounded because he hadn't cleaned his room
before he left for camp. :-( So many of the kids don't have the
home-life that our kids do. That was eye-opening for Cameron!
Anyway---back to the point: <g> It's really good for kids to see other
kids living this lifestyle. I'd make it a priority to let my child
connect with other unschoolers as much as possible. Plan
parties/camp-outs/whatever! Get them in touch with each other!
~Kelly
________________________________________________________________________
Check out the new AOL. Most comprehensive set of free safety and
security tools, free access to millions of high-quality videos from
across the web, free AOL Mail and more.
[email protected]
>>Anyway---back to the point: <g> It's really good for kids to see other kids living this lifestyle. I'd make it a priority to let my child connect with other unschoolers as much as possible. Planparties/camp-outs/whatever! Get them in touch with each other!>>
Come on up to Corvallis, OR in November! We'll have a bunch of unschoolers hanging out to talk and share with. Details here: http://tinyurl.com/ekoen
--
~Mary
http://zenmommasgarden.blogspot.com/
"The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the
green earth, dwelling deeply in the present moment and feeling truly
alive."
~Thich Nhat Hanh
-------------- Original message ----------------------
From: kbcdlovejo@...
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: airokat@...
>
> As for Not Back To School Camp, she attended this past summer and had a
> WONDERFUL time! I had shown her the website and asked her if she
> thought it
> would be a good way to meet other homeschoolers and she decided on her
> own to
> go. I put her on a train alone at night in Emmeryville Ca for a 17 hour
> trip to
> Oregon. (Wait, Mom....you wont let me take the bus across town at night
> but I
> can take a train at night to another state?) I gave her "Life Skills"
> credit for
> that. Anyway, she did the Natural Building workshop and a lot of other
> stuff
> including belly and swing dancing. And she wants to go back next year
> for the
> whole two weeks. She was amazed at the unschoolers and commented how
> accomplished they were "at more than one thing!," and that they were
> more
> educated than her peers. So I know she will be fine....i just need to
> trust the
> process and not be influenced by everyone else.
> thanks again to all and I will keep reading!
> Kathryn
>
>
> -=-=-=-=-
>
> I can't recommend NBTSCamp (and the L&L Conference, of course!) enough.
>
> It's so helpful for teens to see other teens living this lifestyle.
> Helps them to realize that we parents aren't crazy either! <g>
>
> Smart, interested, interesting, full of life! It's just wonderful.
>
> Cameron went to NBTSCamp in West Virgnia last year. This year he went
> to the Oregon AND the Vermont camps.
>
> It's a powerful week. And they get to meet so many neat teens.
> Unfortunately, several that Cam met were unschooling withOUT parental
> involvement. The had just quit school and were trying to better
> themselves completely on their own. That's hard. One boy got home from
> camp and was immediately grounded because he hadn't cleaned his room
> before he left for camp. :-( So many of the kids don't have the
> home-life that our kids do. That was eye-opening for Cameron!
>
> Anyway---back to the point: <g> It's really good for kids to see other
> kids living this lifestyle. I'd make it a priority to let my child
> connect with other unschoolers as much as possible. Plan
> parties/camp-outs/whatever! Get them in touch with each other!
>
> ~Kelly
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> ________________________________________________________________________
> Check out the new AOL. Most comprehensive set of free safety and
> security tools, free access to millions of high-quality videos from
> across the web, free AOL Mail and more.
>
[email protected]
Oh, how I want to come to this!!!
We might, *might* be in Northern California sometime this month, for I don't
know how long.
To save myself the 'hassle' (haha!) of looking it up myself, is it far from
Northern CA to where you lovelies will be hanging out?
Thanks,
Karen
We might, *might* be in Northern California sometime this month, for I don't
know how long.
To save myself the 'hassle' (haha!) of looking it up myself, is it far from
Northern CA to where you lovelies will be hanging out?
Thanks,
Karen
[email protected]
I will try and make it up to Corvallis. It depends on whether we get a couple of new folks trained at work. Can you send out a reminder in a few weeks?
Kathryn
-------------- Original message --------------
From: zenmomma@...
Come on up to Corvallis, OR in November! We'll have a bunch of unschoolers hanging out to talk and share with. Details here: http://tinyurl.com/ekoen
--
~Mary
http://zenmommasgarden.blogspot.com/
"The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the
green earth, dwelling deeply in the present moment and feeling truly
alive."
~Thich Nhat Hanh
-------------- Original message ----------------------
From: kbcdlovejo@...
Kathryn
-------------- Original message --------------
From: zenmomma@...
>>Anyway---back to the point: <g> It's really good for kids to see other kids living this lifestyle. I'd make it a priority to let my child connect with other unschoolers as much as possible. Planparties/camp-outs/whatever! Get them in touch with each other!>>
Come on up to Corvallis, OR in November! We'll have a bunch of unschoolers hanging out to talk and share with. Details here: http://tinyurl.com/ekoen
--
~Mary
http://zenmommasgarden.blogspot.com/
"The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the
green earth, dwelling deeply in the present moment and feeling truly
alive."
~Thich Nhat Hanh
-------------- Original message ----------------------
From: kbcdlovejo@...
>[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> -----Original Message-----
> From: airokat@...
>
> As for Not Back To School Camp, she attended this past summer and had a
> WONDERFUL time! I had shown her the website and asked her if she
> thought it
> would be a good way to meet other homeschoolers and she decided on her
> own to
> go. I put her on a train alone at night in Emmeryville Ca for a 17 hour
> trip to
> Oregon. (Wait, Mom....you wont let me take the bus across town at night
> but I
> can take a train at night to another state?) I gave her "Life Skills"
> credit for
> that. Anyway, she did the Natural Building workshop and a lot of other
> stuff
> including belly and swing dancing. And she wants to go back next year
> for the
> whole two weeks. She was amazed at the unschoolers and commented how
> accomplished they were "at more than one thing!," and that they were
> more
> educated than her peers. So I know she will be fine....i just need to
> trust the
> process and not be influenced by everyone else.
> thanks again to all and I will keep reading!
> Kathryn
>
>
> -=-=-=-=-
>
> I can't recommend NBTSCamp (and the L&L Conference, of course!) enough.
>
> It's so helpful for teens to see other teens living this lifestyle.
> Helps them to realize that we parents aren't crazy either! <g>
>
> Smart, interested, interesting, full of life! It's just wonderful.
>
> Cameron went to NBTSCamp in West Virgnia last year. This year he went
> to the Oregon AND the Vermont camps.
>
> It's a powerful week. And they get to meet so many neat teens.
> Unfortunately, several that Cam met were unschooling withOUT parental
> involvement. The had just quit school and were trying to better
> themselves completely on their own. That's hard. One boy got home from
> camp and was immediately grounded because he hadn't cleaned his room
> before he left for camp. :-( So many of the kids don't have the
> home-life that our kids do. That was eye-opening for Cameron!
>
> Anyway---back to the point: <g> It's really good for kids to see other
> kids living this lifestyle. I'd make it a priority to let my child
> connect with other unschoolers as much as possible. Plan
> parties/camp-outs/whatever! Get them in touch with each other!
>
> ~Kelly
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> __________________________________________________________
> Check out the new AOL. Most comprehensive set of free safety and
> security tools, free access to millions of high-quality videos from
> across the web, free AOL Mail and more.
>
[email protected]
>>Can you send out a reminder in a few weeks?>>I'll try to remember. This is going to be a REALLY informal gathering of unschoolers, so I haven't set up any structure or schedule for us.
I'm also planning a Regional Unschooling Conference for the Spring. That will have some form to it. <g> I'll keep everyone posted.
--
~Mary
http://zenmommasgarden.blogspot.com/
"The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the
green earth, dwelling deeply in the present moment and feeling truly
alive."
~Thich Nhat Hanh
-------------- Original message ----------------------
From: airokat@...
> I will try and make it up to Corvallis. It depends on whether we get a couple of[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> new folks trained at work. Can you send out a reminder in a few weeks?
> Kathryn
>
> -------------- Original message --------------
> From: zenmomma@...
> >>Anyway---back to the point: <g> It's really good for kids to see other kids
> living this lifestyle. I'd make it a priority to let my child connect with other
> unschoolers as much as possible. Plan
> parties/camp-outs/whatever! Get them in touch with each other!>>
>
> Come on up to Corvallis, OR in November! We'll have a bunch of unschoolers
> hanging out to talk and share with. Details here: http://tinyurl.com/ekoen
> --
> ~Mary
> http://zenmommasgarden.blogspot.com/
>
> "The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the
> green earth, dwelling deeply in the present moment and feeling truly
> alive."
> ~Thich Nhat Hanh
>
> -------------- Original message ----------------------
> From: kbcdlovejo@...
> >
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: airokat@...
> >
> > As for Not Back To School Camp, she attended this past summer and had a
> > WONDERFUL time! I had shown her the website and asked her if she
> > thought it
> > would be a good way to meet other homeschoolers and she decided on her
> > own to
> > go. I put her on a train alone at night in Emmeryville Ca for a 17 hour
> > trip to
> > Oregon. (Wait, Mom....you wont let me take the bus across town at night
> > but I
> > can take a train at night to another state?) I gave her "Life Skills"
> > credit for
> > that. Anyway, she did the Natural Building workshop and a lot of other
> > stuff
> > including belly and swing dancing. And she wants to go back next year
> > for the
> > whole two weeks. She was amazed at the unschoolers and commented how
> > accomplished they were "at more than one thing!," and that they were
> > more
> > educated than her peers. So I know she will be fine....i just need to
> > trust the
> > process and not be influenced by everyone else.
> > thanks again to all and I will keep reading!
> > Kathryn
> >
> >
> > -=-=-=-=-
> >
> > I can't recommend NBTSCamp (and the L&L Conference, of course!) enough.
> >
> > It's so helpful for teens to see other teens living this lifestyle.
> > Helps them to realize that we parents aren't crazy either! <g>
> >
> > Smart, interested, interesting, full of life! It's just wonderful.
> >
> > Cameron went to NBTSCamp in West Virgnia last year. This year he went
> > to the Oregon AND the Vermont camps.
> >
> > It's a powerful week. And they get to meet so many neat teens.
> > Unfortunately, several that Cam met were unschooling withOUT parental
> > involvement. The had just quit school and were trying to better
> > themselves completely on their own. That's hard. One boy got home from
> > camp and was immediately grounded because he hadn't cleaned his room
> > before he left for camp. :-( So many of the kids don't have the
> > home-life that our kids do. That was eye-opening for Cameron!
> >
> > Anyway---back to the point: <g> It's really good for kids to see other
> > kids living this lifestyle. I'd make it a priority to let my child
> > connect with other unschoolers as much as possible. Plan
> > parties/camp-outs/whatever! Get them in touch with each other!
> >
> > ~Kelly
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > __________________________________________________________
> > Check out the new AOL. Most comprehensive set of free safety and
> > security tools, free access to millions of high-quality videos from
> > across the web, free AOL Mail and more.
> >
>
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
[email protected]
>>To save myself the 'hassle' (haha!) of looking it up myself, is it far from Northern CA to where you lovelies will be hanging out?>>I think it's about a 4 hour drive to the CA border from Corvallis.
--
~Mary
http://zenmommasgarden.blogspot.com/
"The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the
green earth, dwelling deeply in the present moment and feeling truly
alive."
~Thich Nhat Hanh
-------------- Original message ----------------------
From: buxcel@...
> Oh, how I want to come to this!!!
> We might, *might* be in Northern California sometime this month, for I don't
> know how long.
>
> To save myself the 'hassle' (haha!) of looking it up myself, is it far from
> Northern CA to where you lovelies will be hanging out?
>
> Thanks,
> Karen
>
Shields
It also depends on what part of northern CA you're in. The Bay area is
considered northern by most people, but it's 5 hours from the border. Just
for comparison, it takes us 9 hours to drive from Bend, OR to the South Bay
(all depends on traffic too).
_____
From: [email protected]
[mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of zenmomma@...
Sent: Friday, October 06, 2006 3:13 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] New and with a teenager
I think it's about a 4 hour drive to the CA border from Corvallis.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
considered northern by most people, but it's 5 hours from the border. Just
for comparison, it takes us 9 hours to drive from Bend, OR to the South Bay
(all depends on traffic too).
_____
From: [email protected]
[mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of zenmomma@...
Sent: Friday, October 06, 2006 3:13 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] New and with a teenager
>>To save myself the 'hassle' (haha!) of looking it up myself, is it farfrom Northern CA to where you lovelies will be hanging out?>>
I think it's about a 4 hour drive to the CA border from Corvallis.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Karen Buxcel
Cool!
Maybe we can swing that, we're still waiting to hear if they'll be sending John to work there, or not!
fingers crossed!!
Karen
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Maybe we can swing that, we're still waiting to hear if they'll be sending John to work there, or not!
fingers crossed!!
Karen
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]