suggestions
Solé
And another question: I'm unsure how to "strew" and suggest things. I
found the texts on "strewing" at Sandra Dodd's site helpful, but I
keep wondering whether my suggestions are manipulating or not and if
I should wait for her to come, or not, if it disturbs if I keep
telling her while she watches tv or whenever that we could do X Y or
Z. I mean, If I say, hey, we could do X, and she says no – should I
just let her then? For how long until I suggest something new? Maybe
she would do Y instead of X and tv!, But I can't keep suggesting all
the time until there is something, can I? and I can't ask "Would you
like more suggestions" either, do I? So I'm kind of stuck. Apart from
laying out interesting things in the house and so on, how do you
suggest things to your children, when they aren't so creative yet?
She doesn't come herself and asks, she did before but now that there
is tv and pc without limits she kind of always goes there if she's
bored instead of asking – so I guess I should be suggesting things,
but how exactly? Like, if she's sitting 6 hours in front of the tv,
occasionally standing up to grab something from the fridge or going
to the toilet. Would you be saying things every hour, just in case?
Or whenever she stands up? Would you try to make it sound fun, or is
that manipulating?
Johanna :-)
found the texts on "strewing" at Sandra Dodd's site helpful, but I
keep wondering whether my suggestions are manipulating or not and if
I should wait for her to come, or not, if it disturbs if I keep
telling her while she watches tv or whenever that we could do X Y or
Z. I mean, If I say, hey, we could do X, and she says no – should I
just let her then? For how long until I suggest something new? Maybe
she would do Y instead of X and tv!, But I can't keep suggesting all
the time until there is something, can I? and I can't ask "Would you
like more suggestions" either, do I? So I'm kind of stuck. Apart from
laying out interesting things in the house and so on, how do you
suggest things to your children, when they aren't so creative yet?
She doesn't come herself and asks, she did before but now that there
is tv and pc without limits she kind of always goes there if she's
bored instead of asking – so I guess I should be suggesting things,
but how exactly? Like, if she's sitting 6 hours in front of the tv,
occasionally standing up to grab something from the fridge or going
to the toilet. Would you be saying things every hour, just in case?
Or whenever she stands up? Would you try to make it sound fun, or is
that manipulating?
Johanna :-)
Michelle Leifur Reid
On 9/22/06, Solé <solelokuai@...> wrote:
to do other things or even to seek to look deeper into anything. It
is about providing the resources for her. And she needs time (a lot
of time with school in the mix) to trust that this "strewing" isn't a
guise for "educational learning experience." Are you watching tv with
her or leaving her to watch alone. My children have finally figured
out that I am rather useless playing video games and that I have a
hard time following the story line in many of the games. That doesn't
lessen their desire for me to sit in the living room while they play.
They don't mind if I sit and knit or some other hand craft as long as
I am interacting with them. I ask a HUGE amount of (rather silly and
sometimes seemingly ditzy) questions and I tend to forget who the good
guys are from the bad guys (especially when they have alter egos and
have been controlled by higher forces).
Take baby steps in your discovery of unschooling. YOu may even find
you have to a lot of backtracking and looping over and over since you
have school to deal with. It's not going to happen overnight. Didn't
for most of us, especially those of us who have had children in school
or were very schooly before discovering the "enlightenment of
unschooling!" :)
Michelle
> IWhy are you suggesting anything. Strewing isn't about influencing her
> keep wondering whether my suggestions are manipulating or not and if
> I should wait for her to come, or not, if it disturbs if I keep
> telling her while she watches tv or whenever that we could do X Y or
> Z. I mean, If I say, hey, we could do X, and she says no – should I
> just let her then? For how long until I suggest something new?
to do other things or even to seek to look deeper into anything. It
is about providing the resources for her. And she needs time (a lot
of time with school in the mix) to trust that this "strewing" isn't a
guise for "educational learning experience." Are you watching tv with
her or leaving her to watch alone. My children have finally figured
out that I am rather useless playing video games and that I have a
hard time following the story line in many of the games. That doesn't
lessen their desire for me to sit in the living room while they play.
They don't mind if I sit and knit or some other hand craft as long as
I am interacting with them. I ask a HUGE amount of (rather silly and
sometimes seemingly ditzy) questions and I tend to forget who the good
guys are from the bad guys (especially when they have alter egos and
have been controlled by higher forces).
Take baby steps in your discovery of unschooling. YOu may even find
you have to a lot of backtracking and looping over and over since you
have school to deal with. It's not going to happen overnight. Didn't
for most of us, especially those of us who have had children in school
or were very schooly before discovering the "enlightenment of
unschooling!" :)
Michelle
Mara
One thing would be, say she is watching a program on X
and you are watching it with her, you could say things
like, 'I would like to go to the library/bookstore to
get a book I would like. I bet they have some more
interesting things on X, would you like to come and
check it out?'
Or, ' I have seen something about X at this or that
place, what do you think about travelling there
together?'
Or,' If there is a country she is interested in - get
a penpal maybe?
As long as the suggestions are casual and fun, and she
knows any answer she gives is fine, eventually she
might go along with something. If she would rather
stay home and you go yourself, bring her something she
might enjoy. And if she does not enjoy it, that is
fine too.
Alright, enough for tonight!
Mara
--- Solé <solelokuai@...> wrote:
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
http://mail.yahoo.com
and you are watching it with her, you could say things
like, 'I would like to go to the library/bookstore to
get a book I would like. I bet they have some more
interesting things on X, would you like to come and
check it out?'
Or, ' I have seen something about X at this or that
place, what do you think about travelling there
together?'
Or,' If there is a country she is interested in - get
a penpal maybe?
As long as the suggestions are casual and fun, and she
knows any answer she gives is fine, eventually she
might go along with something. If she would rather
stay home and you go yourself, bring her something she
might enjoy. And if she does not enjoy it, that is
fine too.
Alright, enough for tonight!
Mara
--- Solé <solelokuai@...> wrote:
> And another question: I'm unsure how to "strew" andmailto:[email protected]
> suggest things. I
> found the texts on "strewing" at Sandra Dodd's site
> helpful, but I
> keep wondering whether my suggestions are
> manipulating or not and if
> I should wait for her to come, or not, if it
> disturbs if I keep
> telling her while she watches tv or whenever that we
> could do X Y or
> Z. I mean, If I say, hey, we could do X, and she
> says no should I
> just let her then? For how long until I suggest
> something new? Maybe
> she would do Y instead of X and tv!, But I can't
> keep suggesting all
> the time until there is something, can I? and I
> can't ask "Would you
> like more suggestions" either, do I? So I'm kind of
> stuck. Apart from
> laying out interesting things in the house and so
> on, how do you
> suggest things to your children, when they aren't so
> creative yet?
> She doesn't come herself and asks, she did before
> but now that there
> is tv and pc without limits she kind of always goes
> there if she's
> bored instead of asking so I guess I should be
> suggesting things,
> but how exactly? Like, if she's sitting 6 hours in
> front of the tv,
> occasionally standing up to grab something from the
> fridge or going
> to the toilet. Would you be saying things every
> hour, just in case?
> Or whenever she stands up? Would you try to make it
> sound fun, or is
> that manipulating?
>
> Johanna :-)
>
>
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>
> (Yahoo! ID required)
>
>
>__________________________________________________
>
>
>
>
>
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
http://mail.yahoo.com