Liking these slow days...
[email protected]
The neighbor boy is here today. He's kind of starved for attention and
so sometimes does things he knows will get him attention, only not the
positive kind.
Dylan has been having a hard time with him lately. He's been a little
mean but Dylan starts off every day hopeful that it will be one of their
good days. He's ten, and hopeful is easy to come by.
Today Tyson was being destructive to our cactus. He was pulling spines
out of it and stabbing them into his tongue. (ok, destructive to his
tongue too.) I won't speculate on how weird that is. But Dylan asked
him not to harm the cactus and when he said "why not?" this was my son's
answer.
Because our cactus needs to be fully armed and ready for the pending war
with the French. The French are angry that we are using the term "French
fries" for our potatoes. They demanded compensation, all our bologna,
and we refused. In retaliation they are stealing all our bicycles and
turning the yellow ones into a hideous cheese they intend to market to us
in order to exact their revenge.
At this point Tyson, who is twelve, says "naw, you're just pullin' my
leg" and Dylan says, no, it was on the news. World News at 12. Tyson
says - no such thing -and Dylan asks if Tyson usually watches World New
at 11, because if so, THAT's not real and haven't you ever noticed how
that guy's hair never moves and he never changes expression? He's really
just a puppet under the control of the angry French trying to lull us all
into a stupor so we're more likely to buy and eat the deadly new French
cheese, which is really just stolen, yellow American bicycles. They are
going to market it first at McDonald's because they believe that would be
the most direct and fastest way to get it to the population.
The cheese, so evil and deadly will turn those it doesn't immediately
kill into zombies who will willingly give up the term "French fries," AND
hand over all their bologna.
By this time Tyson has forgotten entirely about the cactus.
But, there is a chance of failure. So their contingency plan is to
invade. We know a secret however, and that is the French love cactus and
eat it by the hordes. It's a delicacy over there, only NOT American
cactus which is acutely toxic to anyone who has eaten French cactus. And
so, of course, we need our cactus.
Tyson says..."Tell another one..."
There's something about sharks on surf boards right now.
Deb L
so sometimes does things he knows will get him attention, only not the
positive kind.
Dylan has been having a hard time with him lately. He's been a little
mean but Dylan starts off every day hopeful that it will be one of their
good days. He's ten, and hopeful is easy to come by.
Today Tyson was being destructive to our cactus. He was pulling spines
out of it and stabbing them into his tongue. (ok, destructive to his
tongue too.) I won't speculate on how weird that is. But Dylan asked
him not to harm the cactus and when he said "why not?" this was my son's
answer.
Because our cactus needs to be fully armed and ready for the pending war
with the French. The French are angry that we are using the term "French
fries" for our potatoes. They demanded compensation, all our bologna,
and we refused. In retaliation they are stealing all our bicycles and
turning the yellow ones into a hideous cheese they intend to market to us
in order to exact their revenge.
At this point Tyson, who is twelve, says "naw, you're just pullin' my
leg" and Dylan says, no, it was on the news. World News at 12. Tyson
says - no such thing -and Dylan asks if Tyson usually watches World New
at 11, because if so, THAT's not real and haven't you ever noticed how
that guy's hair never moves and he never changes expression? He's really
just a puppet under the control of the angry French trying to lull us all
into a stupor so we're more likely to buy and eat the deadly new French
cheese, which is really just stolen, yellow American bicycles. They are
going to market it first at McDonald's because they believe that would be
the most direct and fastest way to get it to the population.
The cheese, so evil and deadly will turn those it doesn't immediately
kill into zombies who will willingly give up the term "French fries," AND
hand over all their bologna.
By this time Tyson has forgotten entirely about the cactus.
But, there is a chance of failure. So their contingency plan is to
invade. We know a secret however, and that is the French love cactus and
eat it by the hordes. It's a delicacy over there, only NOT American
cactus which is acutely toxic to anyone who has eaten French cactus. And
so, of course, we need our cactus.
Tyson says..."Tell another one..."
There's something about sharks on surf boards right now.
Deb L
Pam Hartley
----------
From: ddzimlew@...
To: [email protected]
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Liking these slow days...
Date: Fri, Jul 26, 2002, 12:54 PM
Because our cactus needs to be fully armed and ready for the pending war
with the French.
I KNEW IT!!!!
And they said I was crazy.
Pam
P.S. Deb, may I please put in a bid for an arranged marriage between Brit
and Dylan? They're made for each other. <g>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
From: ddzimlew@...
To: [email protected]
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Liking these slow days...
Date: Fri, Jul 26, 2002, 12:54 PM
Because our cactus needs to be fully armed and ready for the pending war
with the French.
I KNEW IT!!!!
And they said I was crazy.
Pam
P.S. Deb, may I please put in a bid for an arranged marriage between Brit
and Dylan? They're made for each other. <g>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Nancy Wooton
on 7/26/02 12:54 PM, ddzimlew@... at ddzimlew@... wrote:
be able to search Snopes.com for "armed cactus French bologna."
btw, does Dylan read The Onion?
Nancy, still imagining bicycle cheese.... Is that why the leader in the
Tour de France wears yellow???
> ..."Tell another one..."You know, this must be how internet hoaxes get started. Pretty soon you'll
>
> There's something about sharks on surf boards right now.
be able to search Snopes.com for "armed cactus French bologna."
btw, does Dylan read The Onion?
Nancy, still imagining bicycle cheese.... Is that why the leader in the
Tour de France wears yellow???
[email protected]
>may I please put in a bid for an arranged marriage between BritWell, he says he KNOWS he'll never be interested in girls <g> and that
>and Dylan? They're made for each other. <g>
he's going to stay with me forever.
At ten this is just so sweet but if he's still saying it in a few years
we'll all be going for therapy.
Deb L
[email protected]
>You know, this must be how internet hoaxes get started. Pretty soonyou'll
>be able to search Snopes.com for "armed cactus French bologna."There was no way I could retell in and do it justice. The bologna bit
came about because the other boy had said "that's bologna" and without
hesitation it was just incorporated into the story. I can't tell you how
funny it was.
>btw, does Dylan read The Onion?I don't think he's ever seen it. What is it?
>Is that why the leader in theI think that's how it all came about, we were reading about Lance
>Tour de France wears yellow???
Armstrong this morning.
Deb L
Nancy Wooton
on 7/26/02 3:08 PM, ddzimlew@... at ddzimlew@... wrote:
It's a newspaper parody, online at www.theonion.com
Very funny but R-rated.
Nancy
>> btw, does Dylan read The Onion?Oh, I guess he's a bit young for The Onion =:-0 but you might like it.
>
> I don't think he's ever seen it. What is it?
It's a newspaper parody, online at www.theonion.com
Very funny but R-rated.
Nancy
[email protected]
In a message dated 7/26/02 6:17:56 PM, ikonstitcher@... writes:
<< Oh, I guess he's a bit young for The Onion =:-0 but you might like it.
It's a newspaper parody, online at www.theonion.com
<<Very funny but R-rated. >>
But you can find articles there and give them to him.
Same with Brunching Shuttlecocks. Some are nasty, but others aren't.
Choose Your Own Damned Harry Potter Adventure isn't too bad, as I recall.
And on The Onion there's an article about Mario and game guys ...
Well I'l just find it for you.
Sandra
<< Oh, I guess he's a bit young for The Onion =:-0 but you might like it.
It's a newspaper parody, online at www.theonion.com
<<Very funny but R-rated. >>
But you can find articles there and give them to him.
Same with Brunching Shuttlecocks. Some are nasty, but others aren't.
Choose Your Own Damned Harry Potter Adventure isn't too bad, as I recall.
And on The Onion there's an article about Mario and game guys ...
Well I'l just find it for you.
Sandra
meghan anderson
on 7/26/02 3:14 PM, [email protected] at
[email protected] wrote:
Meghan
--
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety
deserve neither liberty nor safety, and ultimately will have neither."
~ Benjamin Franklin
[email protected] wrote:
> The neighbor boy is here today. He's kind of starved for attention andI am dying to meet Dylan! He sounds so FUN!
> so sometimes does things he knows will get him attention, only not the
> positive kind.
> Dylan has been having a hard time with him lately. He's been a little
> mean but Dylan starts off every day hopeful that it will be one of their
> good days. He's ten, and hopeful is easy to come by.
> Today Tyson was being destructive to our cactus. He was pulling spines
> out of it and stabbing them into his tongue. (ok, destructive to his
> tongue too.) I won't speculate on how weird that is. But Dylan asked
> him not to harm the cactus and when he said "why not?" this was my son's
> answer.
>
> Because our cactus needs to be fully armed and ready for the pending war
> with the French. The French are angry that we are using the term "French
> fries" for our potatoes. They demanded compensation, all our bologna,
> and we refused. In retaliation they are stealing all our bicycles and
> turning the yellow ones into a hideous cheese they intend to market to us
> in order to exact their revenge.
> At this point Tyson, who is twelve, says "naw, you're just pullin' my
> leg" and Dylan says, no, it was on the news. World News at 12. Tyson
> says - no such thing -and Dylan asks if Tyson usually watches World New
> at 11, because if so, THAT's not real and haven't you ever noticed how
> that guy's hair never moves and he never changes expression? He's really
> just a puppet under the control of the angry French trying to lull us all
> into a stupor so we're more likely to buy and eat the deadly new French
> cheese, which is really just stolen, yellow American bicycles. They are
> going to market it first at McDonald's because they believe that would be
> the most direct and fastest way to get it to the population.
> The cheese, so evil and deadly will turn those it doesn't immediately
> kill into zombies who will willingly give up the term "French fries," AND
> hand over all their bologna.
> By this time Tyson has forgotten entirely about the cactus.
> But, there is a chance of failure. So their contingency plan is to
> invade. We know a secret however, and that is the French love cactus and
> eat it by the hordes. It's a delicacy over there, only NOT American
> cactus which is acutely toxic to anyone who has eaten French cactus. And
> so, of course, we need our cactus.
>
> Tyson says..."Tell another one..."
>
> There's something about sharks on surf boards right now.
>
> Deb L
Meghan
--
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety
deserve neither liberty nor safety, and ultimately will have neither."
~ Benjamin Franklin
Tia Leschke
>Where is this? I just googled on your title and didn't find anything. I
>
>Choose Your Own Damned Harry Potter Adventure isn't too bad, as I recall.
don't think I want to wade through what I'd get by googling on Harry Potter
Adventure.
Tia
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
Eleanor Roosevelt
*********************************************
Tia Leschke
leschke@...
On Vancouver Island
[email protected]
> btw, does Dylan read The Onion?Ah, man! It was a funny and I missed it.
Where have I been?
Deb L