Marriage and a happy home
Sherry Franklin
What excerpts or passages of Sandra's or others do you read when you feel yourself spinning out of control and need a reset? I'm looking specifically for words that will help me to be as kind, patient and loving towards my husband as I am towards my children.
Think you,
Sherry
Jo Isaac
"If your child is more important than your vision of your child, life becomes easier' - Sandra Dodd. Replace 'child' with 'husband' :)
Jo Isaac, PhD
Post-Doctoral Research Assistant,
Centre of Tropical Biodiversity and Climate Change,
James Cook University, Townsville.
Scientific Writer and Researcher: http://joisaac.wordpress.com
To: [email protected]
From: [email protected]
Date: Sun, 15 Feb 2015 21:16:42 -0300
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Marriage and a happy home
Jo Isaac, PhD
Post-Doctoral Research Assistant,
Centre of Tropical Biodiversity and Climate Change,
James Cook University, Townsville.
Scientific Writer and Researcher: http://joisaac.wordpress.com
To: [email protected]
From: [email protected]
Date: Sun, 15 Feb 2015 21:16:42 -0300
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Marriage and a happy home
What excerpts or passages of Sandra's or others do you read when you feel yourself spinning out of control and need a reset? I'm looking specifically for words that will help me to be as kind, patient and loving towards my husband as I am towards my children.
Think you,
Sherry
Laura Zackery
I can't point you to a specific excerpt, but I can share the concept that helped me the most. I read, somewhere, the suggestion to be a peaceful spouse the same way one is a peaceful parent. Even though I have been attempting attachment parenting/peaceful parenting since my oldest was born 15 years ago, my family just began deschooling about six months ago. A very real paradigm shift happened for me when I read someone (probably Sandra) say to stop trying to make things that are important to ME important to THEM. I tried it. I stopped fussing at my kids AND at my husband. It has changed everything, because I was the one creating the conflicts by trying to make things that were important to me important to them and it just wouldn't take. For 15 years I've been doing that! I don't know if this will help your specific situation, but it has definitely helped mine, and I am sure the broad principle can be applied to other situations.
Best wishes,
Laura Zackery
On Feb 15, 2015, at 7:16 PM, "Sherry Franklin sherryfranklin150@... [AlwaysLearning]" <[email protected]> wrote:
What excerpts or passages of Sandra's or others do you read when you feel yourself spinning out of control and need a reset? I'm looking specifically for words that will help me to be as kind, patient and loving towards my husband as I am towards my children.
Think you,Sherry
BRIAN POLIKOWSKY
Here:
On Feb 15, 2015, at 7:16 PM, "Sherry Franklin sherryfranklin150@... [AlwaysLearning]" <[email protected]> wrote:
On Monday, February 16, 2015 7:37 AM, "Laura Zackery zackerylaura@... [AlwaysLearning]" <[email protected]> wrote:
I can't point you to a specific excerpt, but I can share the concept that helped me the most. I read, somewhere, the suggestion to be a peaceful spouse the same way one is a peaceful parent. Even though I have been attempting attachment parenting/peaceful parenting since my oldest was born 15 years ago, my family just began deschooling about six months ago. A very real paradigm shift happened for me when I read someone (probably Sandra) say to stop trying to make things that are important to ME important to THEM. I tried it. I stopped fussing at my kids AND at my husband. It has changed everything, because I was the one creating the conflicts by trying to make things that were important to me important to them and it just wouldn't take. For 15 years I've been doing that! I don't know if this will help your specific situation, but it has definitely helped mine, and I am sure the broad principle can be applied to other situations.
Best wishes,
Laura Zackery
On Feb 15, 2015, at 7:16 PM, "Sherry Franklin sherryfranklin150@... [AlwaysLearning]" <[email protected]> wrote:
What excerpts or passages of Sandra's or others do you read when you feel yourself spinning out of control and need a reset? I'm looking specifically for words that will help me to be as kind, patient and loving towards my husband as I am towards my children.Think you,Sherry
LEAH
I found this article of Sandra's incredibly useful. I keep it book-marked on my laptop for easy access:
~ Leah Rose
To: [email protected]
From: [email protected]
Date: Sun, 15 Feb 2015 21:16:42 -0300
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Marriage and a happy home
To: [email protected]
From: [email protected]
Date: Sun, 15 Feb 2015 21:16:42 -0300
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Marriage and a happy home
What excerpts or passages of Sandra's or others do you read when you feel yourself spinning out of control and need a reset? I'm looking specifically for words that will help me to be as kind, patient and loving towards my husband as I am towards my children.
Think you,
Sherry
robin.bentley@...
I like this, from Colleen Prieto (on Sandra's "Becoming a Better Partner" page):
"For me I think the biggest applications of unschooling in terms of my marriage are the ideas of embracing and supporting other people's passions and interests—not just my child's, but my husband's too. And accepting people for who they are, not trying or wanting to change them or 'fix' them. Valuing everyone in our family for who they are and working together to meet everyone's needs. Unschooling is good for marriages."
Robin B.
"For me I think the biggest applications of unschooling in terms of my marriage are the ideas of embracing and supporting other people's passions and interests—not just my child's, but my husband's too. And accepting people for who they are, not trying or wanting to change them or 'fix' them. Valuing everyone in our family for who they are and working together to meet everyone's needs. Unschooling is good for marriages."
Robin B.
On Feb 15, 2015, at 7:16 PM, "Sherry Franklin sherryfranklin150@... [AlwaysLearning]" <[email protected]> wrote:
What excerpts or passages of Sandra's or others do you read when you feel yourself spinning out of control and need a reset? I'm looking specifically for words that will help me to be as kind, patient and loving towards my husband as I am towards my children.
Think you,Sherry
Deb Lewis
Sorry, sent this to the wrong thread at first.
Here's a link to the Becoming a Better Partner page:
http://sandradodd.com/betterpartner
And here's another excerpt from that page:
***Gratitude/Abundance/Photos***
"It is possible for someone to see through a lens of negativity. Pessimism
and cynicism can do irreversible damage to relationships, so dismantle those
if you're living with them in you. In your choice making, in your moments,
choose to see the good side of each coin. Decide to see what you have, with
eyes of gratitude. See the abundance around you. Be abundantly supportive.
Be someone another will be grateful for.
Occasionally look at photos. Not wall portraits—they become invisible to
those who see them every day. Look through photos from when you were young
and first in love. Remember the times when your partner was new to you, and
you didn't know so much about his family and medical history or problems at
work or failure to finish projects. Remember the spark of love between you,
and remind yourself of the passion of youth. No one makes it to a 50th
anniversary without patiently enduring some imperfect times on the way." ~
Sandra Dodd
Deb Lewis
Here's a link to the Becoming a Better Partner page:
http://sandradodd.com/betterpartner
And here's another excerpt from that page:
***Gratitude/Abundance/Photos***
"It is possible for someone to see through a lens of negativity. Pessimism
and cynicism can do irreversible damage to relationships, so dismantle those
if you're living with them in you. In your choice making, in your moments,
choose to see the good side of each coin. Decide to see what you have, with
eyes of gratitude. See the abundance around you. Be abundantly supportive.
Be someone another will be grateful for.
Occasionally look at photos. Not wall portraits—they become invisible to
those who see them every day. Look through photos from when you were young
and first in love. Remember the times when your partner was new to you, and
you didn't know so much about his family and medical history or problems at
work or failure to finish projects. Remember the spark of love between you,
and remind yourself of the passion of youth. No one makes it to a 50th
anniversary without patiently enduring some imperfect times on the way." ~
Sandra Dodd
Deb Lewis