Rippy and Graham Dusseldorp

From another thread:

-=-  When my family started unschooling, ... my partner and I felt the spirituality of it immediately -=-

and

-=- Sandra pointed out in her last comment on the FB thread 
>>The point I was hoping to have made was that there is a spirituality that doesn't have to do with dogma, but that has to do with becoming a better, more thoughtful, aware, mindful, compassionate, patient, grateful sort of person.<<  -=-


We saw the spirituality inherent in unschooling very soon too. In fact, for our family, it was the most important factor in our decision to unschool.

Homeschooling (much less unschooling) was not on our radar when our kids were little. We just assumed they would go to school. We wanted to find a really nice school for them, so we visited over a dozen schools in our area. We would 'interview' the teachers and principals and ask them how they would deal with students in different situations - feeling left out, being insecure about their spelling, having a different learning speed, etc. We had a list of questions three pages long ;-) We were trying to get a feel for the environment and philosophy of the school. We wanted a school that was invested in helping children be peaceful, kind and thoughtful. We wanted a school that would bring out the best in their spirits.

We didn't find what we were looking for. There were some wonderful teachers that seemed to be filled with love and enthusiasm and some other teachers that seemed very tired and in survival mode. There was no guarantee which teacher our children would spend each year with.

Then a friend mentioned the possibility of homeschooling. We did not know a single homeschooler, but we discovered there was going to be a homeschooling conference. We packed our tent and our toddlers (aged 1 and 3) and went.

We attended a talk by Dr. Alan Thomas. He told stories about natural learning and how much knowledge and experience children soak up while they are living with their families and doing everyday things together. He also gave an example of an unschooled teenage girl who decided she wanted to try high school. Even though she had never been fond of math and had mostly avoided it in the past, she decided to enroll in an 18 week adult education remedial math class to catch up. Not only did she catch up, she excelled in the class.

That got us thinking. Even if we completely messed up and our kids learned nothing academic (which we knew would be impossible), we could be with them at home a bit longer and nurture their spirits in ways that we believed were important. We thought that would be more helpful to them as they grew up and became adults. And if we missed out on some Very Important Core Academic Skill, we could find people to help them with that skill. Or they could take a specific class and get that information from a school when they were a bit older. It seemed like a better and safer bet for their childhood.

Things that we considered important - spiritual - were not offered on school curricula. Things like being in love with life and loving yourself, being curious and in awe, being grateful, paying attention to the beauty in people and places and things, paying attention to your own thoughts, words and actions, being brave enough to see where you need to stretch and grow to be kinder, learning how to live with others in a peaceful way, being light hearted and helpful, being a good friend and partner, learning to breathe and take time to find your balance when life unsettles you. 

Of course we wanted them to be able to read, write, do math, science, and everything else academic, but after that conference, all of that seemed easier to do. We became more and more confident that we could help them with the academics in fun and interesting ways. We actually were excited about it!

We decided that we didn't want to share our limited time with our children with teachers and a school that didn't prioritize spiritual aspects as much as we did. I'm so happy we made that decision all those years ago. And soon after, we discovered that unschoolers on Always Learning were discussing and considering the very things that were so dear to our hearts.

To me, it seems like 18 years can go by in the blink of an eye. Right now we are the stars in our children's lives and they want to spend almost all their time with us. Eventually though, there will be friends, boyfriends/girlfriends, husbands/wives, their own children and grandchildren, that will overshadow us. And that is good and natural :-) We want them to have rich, love filled lives. 

We just want to make the best use of our time with them while we are the stars in their lives. We want to help them in the ways that we believe will benefit them most.

Rippy
(Gianluca 9, Gisele 7)

janine davies

>>>Things that we considered important - spiritual - were not offered on school curricula. Things like being in love with life and loving yourself, being curious and in awe, being grateful, paying attention to the beauty in people and places and things, paying attention to your own thoughts, words and actions, being brave enough to see where you need to stretch and grow to be kinder, learning how to live with others in a peaceful way, being light hearted and helpful, being a good friend and partner, learning to breathe and take time to find your balance when life unsettles you.<<<

Yes Yes Yes!!! This is it! This is exactly it. And I believe all these thoughts surface in most parents when school age looms, but we push them down - I know I did, feeling silly and odd to be thinking this way…. We have nurtured and developed this amazing bond and closeness with them, almost a secret language of love and learning of what they need, how they think and feel, and then suddenly boom! it ends as you hand them over to this place, away from you and with strangers and connections broken. 

>>>It seemed like a better and safer bet for their childhood.<<<

And it is, it so is - Grateful everyday for unschooling and listening to my heart finally...

>>>To me, it seems like 18 years can go by in the blink of an eye. Right now we are the stars in our children's lives and they want to spend almost all their time with us. Eventually though, there will be friends, boyfriends/girlfriends, husbands/wives, their own children and grandchildren, that will overshadow us. And that is good and natural :-) We want them to have rich, love filled lives.<<

And they will make a deep and profound difference to the lives of the people they meet, and love, and share their lives with - because we and our children Have chosen this way to live and learn, and because they have rich, love filled lives. 

Janine 





To: [email protected]
From: ripgray@...
Date: Sun, 2 Mar 2014 12:02:00 +0100
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Spirituality and Unschooling

 
From another thread:

-=-  When my family started unschooling, ... my partner and I felt the spirituality of it immediately -=-

and

-=- Sandra pointed out in her last comment on the FB thread 
>>The point I was hoping to have made was that there is a spirituality that doesn't have to do with dogma, but that has to do with becoming a better, more thoughtful, aware, mindful, compassionate, patient, grateful sort of person.<<  -=-


We saw the spirituality inherent in unschooling very soon too. In fact, for our family, it was the most important factor in our decision to unschool.

Homeschooling (much less unschooling) was not on our radar when our kids were little. We just assumed they would go to school. We wanted to find a really nice school for them, so we visited over a dozen schools in our area. We would 'interview' the teachers and principals and ask them how they would deal with students in different situations - feeling left out, being insecure about their spelling, having a different learning speed, etc. We had a list of questions three pages long ;-) We were trying to get a feel for the environment and philosophy of the school. We wanted a school that was invested in helping children be peaceful, kind and thoughtful. We wanted a school that would bring out the best in their spirits.

We didn't find what we were looking for. There were some wonderful teachers that seemed to be filled with love and enthusiasm and some other teachers that seemed very tired and in survival mode. There was no guarantee which teacher our children would spend each year with.

Then a friend mentioned the possibility of homeschooling. We did not know a single homeschooler, but we discovered there was going to be a homeschooling conference. We packed our tent and our toddlers (aged 1 and 3) and went.

We attended a talk by Dr. Alan Thomas. He told stories about natural learning and how much knowledge and experience children soak up while they are living with their families and doing everyday things together. He also gave an example of an unschooled teenage girl who decided she wanted to try high school. Even though she had never been fond of math and had mostly avoided it in the past, she decided to enroll in an 18 week adult education remedial math class to catch up. Not only did she catch up, she excelled in the class.

That got us thinking. Even if we completely messed up and our kids learned nothing academic (which we knew would be impossible), we could be with them at home a bit longer and nurture their spirits in ways that we believed were important. We thought that would be more helpful to them as they grew up and became adults. And if we missed out on some Very Important Core Academic Skill, we could find people to help them with that skill. Or they could take a specific class and get that information from a school when they were a bit older. It seemed like a better and safer bet for their childhood.

Things that we considered important - spiritual - were not offered on school curricula. Things like being in love with life and loving yourself, being curious and in awe, being grateful, paying attention to the beauty in people and places and things, paying attention to your own thoughts, words and actions, being brave enough to see where you need to stretch and grow to be kinder, learning how to live with others in a peaceful way, being light hearted and helpful, being a good friend and partner, learning to breathe and take time to find your balance when life unsettles you. 

Of course we wanted them to be able to read, write, do math, science, and everything else academic, but after that conference, all of that seemed easier to do. We became more and more confident that we could help them with the academics in fun and interesting ways. We actually were excited about it!

We decided that we didn't want to share our limited time with our children with teachers and a school that didn't prioritize spiritual aspects as much as we did. I'm so happy we made that decision all those years ago. And soon after, we discovered that unschoolers on Always Learning were discussing and considering the very things that were so dear to our hearts.

To me, it seems like 18 years can go by in the blink of an eye. Right now we are the stars in our children's lives and they want to spend almost all their time with us. Eventually though, there will be friends, boyfriends/girlfriends, husbands/wives, their own children and grandchildren, that will overshadow us. And that is good and natural :-) We want them to have rich, love filled lives. 

We just want to make the best use of our time with them while we are the stars in their lives. We want to help them in the ways that we believe will benefit them most.

Rippy
(Gianluca 9, Gisele 7)